AN: Alright, it's official. I suck. I know it's been 2 months but I hope you guys are still reading. I'm currently on Spring Break right now so hopefully I'll be able to get out another chapter before classes start again on Monday. And just for waiting, this chapter is extra long. It's practically double the length of the rest. I hope you enjoy it!
foxyfeline, I apologize. I know I promised an update by Friday but the week passed faster than I thought it would. So, here's the new chapter! I hope you enjoy it. I think I did a pretty decent job. More of JJ's (and Emily's) pasts will be discussed in the next chapter.
Thanks again to everyone who's reading! Please let me know what you think!
Chapter 10
"Emily! Seriously! Hurry up!" JJ exclaimed for the third time. It was almost nine o'clock and Lauren's Halloween party had started at eight-thirty.
"I'm done! I'm done!" Emily fixed her headband once more before standing from her desk where she had been applying her makeup. "Good Lord, JJ, you have no patience."
"I was being patient. An hour and a half ago!" She replied dramatically.
"Sorry! I'm, I'm just a little nervous. This is the first time Spencer and I are going out, together, in public… you know, with other college kids around."
"Em, you'll be fine. You guys have gone on like a billion dates, you hang out every day… you'll be fine. You're practically dating already." JJ tried to reassure her.
"Speak for yourself. You and Derek still haven't figured out what you guys are doing." Emily pointed out. "I mean, I thought you were going to ask him about it?"
"I was. And then that game happened. We've barely gone out since then. Classes are kicking our asses right now. I'll ask him tonight." She replied as there was a knock on the door. "Now come on, ladybug. We have a party to get to." She pulled the door open to reveal Derek and Spencer, dressed as a gangster and a geeky scientist, respectively.
"Hey, JJ, stop." Emily said from behind her before readjusting the skirt to her costume. "You're bumblebee-hind was showing."
"You're obnoxious." JJ told her but couldn't help from laughing. She took Derek's outstretched hand and headed down the hallway of the dorm; Emily and Spencer following close behind. "Hey, can I ask you something?" JJ stopped walking suddenly, causing Emily to walk right into her. "Sorry, Em. You guys go ahead. I… forgot my cellphone."
Emily nodded, catching onto JJ's unspoken words. "We'll wait for you downstairs."
Once the other two were out of earshot, Derek turned to face JJ. "What's up, babe?"
"I, I've never had this conversation before so sorry if it sounds ridiculous, but what are we doing?" She asked, not wanting to beat around the bush. "Like, are we friends? Are we dating? Are we a couple? I've never needed to stop and define a relationship before. I'm not sure exactly how to do it."
"JJ, stop." Derek squeezed her hand, interrupting her ramble. "I like you, you like me, correct?"
JJ nodded slowly, not sure where he was going with this. "Yes, yes that's correct."
"Okay, so what's the problem?" He asked. "Do we really need to find a definition for it?"
"I just…" JJ paused, not wanting her words to come out wrong and be misconstrued. "We're dating. That's what I think is happening here. I think you're my boyfriend. I think that means I don't see other guys or flirt with emergency room doctors. I want to know what you think though, because if you think we're just friends who mess around then you need to tell me before I get myself in too deep."
"No!" Derek exclaimed. "No. We're not just messin' around, JJ. I told you that before. And no, I don't see or flirt with other girls. You're my girlfriend. That's what I think. We are dating. We're a couple. We're together. We're … well, you get the point." He shrugged. "But there's more, isn't there?"
JJ sighed and nodded. "Yeah, uh, I… Derek, I come with some baggage. And I know I told you this before but I'm going to repeat myself so that you really understand. I won't hold it against you if you bail. I'm not good at this relationship situation so you're going to have to be patient. I've had boyfriends, yes, but I've only had one serious relationship, and that is a different story for a different day. What I'm sayin' is that I don't know how to be a girlfriend. I'm going to make mistakes but so does everyone else. And you aren't allowed to bail when I do because… because I said so."
"JJ, I wouldn't bail on you because you made a mistake." He placed his hands on her waist and pulled her towards him. "I don't expect you to be perfect."
"I just… I want you understand, understand what you're getting yourself into." She sighed, resting her head against his chest.
Derek lifted her chin with his finger so he could meet her eyes. "Babe, I do. Trust me. I know exactly what I'm doing."
"You're sure?"
"Absolutely." He nodded, leaning down to place a kiss on her lips.
"Okay." She whispered when they broke apart.
"Come on. Let's get to downstairs before Emily comes up here and makes some awkward comment." He smirked, taking her hand in his and entwining their fingers. "I think we should let Spencer and Emily have the room tonight. What do you think?"
"My room?" She asked, following him into the stairwell. "Or your room?"
Derek chuckled. "Either way if you're bunking with me."
"Oh!" JJ exclaimed. "Wait, are you… you mean…?"
"I mean I want to spend the night sleeping to the most beautiful bumblebee I know." He replied, pausing and turning around on the step in front of her to face, making him just about eye level with her.
"So you don't…?" She trailed off, not knowing how to form the question she wanted to ask.
"Babe, you know I do, but I don't want to rush things." He told her seriously. "I want to make sure we're both sure about everything and that we're both ready to take it to the next level. It's only been a month and a half. I want to do this right."
JJ pulled her bottom lip in between her teeth and nodded. "Okay."
"And besides, you said there were things I needed to know before we did that. So, when you're ready to talk about those things, and take your time, I mean it, and then we'll go from there."
"I want to tell you, Derek. I do. I just don't know how. I've never told anyone, besides Em, and that's because she was there."
Derek nodded. "It's okay. We'll talk about it later, babe." Grabbing her hand once more, Derek continued down the staircase and out of the building, where Spencer and Emily were standing with their arms wrapped around each other, whispering quietly. "Hey, get a room, you two."
Emily leaned into Spencer and laughed. "Don't mind if we do." She turned to look at her best friend and boyfriend. "We thought you decided to bail on us."
JJ shook her head, smiling at her best friends' obvious happiness. "Nope. Just made a pit stop."
"Riiight." Emily nodded and pulled back from Spencer. "C'mon, let's get to the party. I want a beverage of the alcoholic variety."
"I'm down with that." Derek laughed and followed the other two across the campus quad.
Two hours later, JJ was severely intoxicated and giggling obnoxiously at a corny joke that one of Derek's teammates had made. Spencer and Emily were in the kitchen, refilling their drinks and Derek had decided to make a trip to the bathroom.
"JJ!" Lauren, the hostess, sat down next to the blonde. "There's a guy here that is looking for you. I told him you weren't here but he didn't believe me. He's kind of creepin' me out though. He was at the last party I had, too. I think he said his name was Doug?"
A sober JJ would have calmly left the room and convinced Doug to leave, but a drunken JJ had a different plan. She chugged down the rest of her drink and walked into the back room, where students were either making out with each other or drunkenly playing pool. She easily found Doug searching the room and made her way over to him.
"What do you want, Doug?" She snapped.
"I told you we weren't over and I meant it, JJ." He replied calmly.
"No, Doug, we ARE over. It's been months. Leave me alone. I let you get away with what you did. Take it and run before I do something to ruin your life." JJ refused to let him get his way this time. She was sick of seeing him and didn't want to deal with his drama anymore.
"JJ. C'mon. I apologized. You know I was drunk and -."
"No!" She exclaimed. "You were not drunk! Yes, there was drinking involved but you were NOT drunk! Stop pretending you didn't do anything wrong! I was there, remember? I KNOW what you did. Emily KNOWS what you did. And everyone in this state will know what you did if you don't leave me alone now!"
"What's going on?" Emily appeared in the doorway. Most of the other partiers had cleared out when JJ started yelling and someone had told Emily that she was freaking out. "Doug, what are you doing here?"
"I just want to talk to JJ, Emily. This isn't any of your business." He replied dismissively.
"Yes, yes it is her business, Doug. She was the one that witnessed what you did! She took care of me afterwards. She helped me through it. She was there! She had to suffer through this just as much as I did, if not more, because she couldn't stop you and your dumbass friends! So yes, it is her business!" JJ was fuming now and the alcohol was not helping the situation at all. "Leave. Now. Or I'm calling the police and ratting out you and every single one of your friends."
"JJ -."
"Now!" She yelled, bringing her hand up and slapping him directly across the face.
"You stupid bitch. You deserved everything that you got. You brought it on yourself." He growled before storming out the back door, slamming it shut behind him with enough force to shake the house.
The room was silent for about thirty seconds before JJ started to sob. Emily was by her side in a flash, wrapping an arm around her waist as her knees buckled and she fell towards the floor.
"JJ, c'mon. Let's go outside." She whispered forcefully. "You need to breath. In and out. C'mon, JJ."
"I can't, he just, so furious! Why me? Why didn't we -." She stammered, struggling to catch her breath in between sobs.
"We still can, JJ. We can go now. I'll drive you to the station now. It's only been six weeks." Emily replied once she had helped her best friend to sit on a lounge chair in the backyard.
JJ shook her head. "I can't. My parents, they'd be so, so disappointed. And Derek? He wouldn't want anything to do with me afterwards. Emily, you were there. You know what happened. Would you wanna be with someone after that happened to them?"
"JJ. Stop." Emily sat down next to the blonde and took both of her hands in hers. "Stop. You didn't do anything wrong. I swear you didn't. Doug and his friends, they took advantage of you –"
"And you." JJ added quietly.
"Mentally, yes, but JJ, they hurt you physically. More than once. I'm only hurting because you're hurting."
"No, Em, I know what happened. I remember. I, I had a nightmare a few weeks back. The first week of school. I know what they did to you, too. You went through the same thing."
"JJ, I did NOT go through what you went through. You went through weeks of it. It only happened to me once."
"Still -."
"JJ, please, stop." Emily sighed, pulling her headband off her head and running a hand through her dark hair. "Do we need to go to the station? Or the hospital? Because we can. The, the evidence is there. It won't take much."
JJ didn't respond at first, silently contemplating everything in her head. "Em, I'm scared. What if I do and nothing happens and he comes back again? He'll be even angrier than before."
"And what if you don't say anything? You know he'll be back again. JJ, this has to be your decision. You know I'm going to support you either way though."
"Can, can we do it tomorrow?" JJ asked hesitantly. "When we haven't been drinking? If I'm going to do this, they have to take me seriously. And they, they won't, if I can't even pass a stupid breathalyzer."
"Of course." Emily nodded, wrapping an arm around JJ's shoulder and pulling her into her. "Do you want to go back to the room? Or do you wanna stay?"
"I, Derek wants me to stay with him tonight." JJ admitted quietly. "Not to, you know, have sex, but, but he wanted you and Spence to have a night to yourselves."
"Do you want to do that? Spencer isn't my priority right now, JJ. You are." She replied, holding her close still.
"I… don't know that I can." She whispered as the tears started streaming down her face again.
"JJ, that's fine. We can talk to Derek. You know he'll understand."
"I, I'm just afraid. Afraid that he's going to bail be, because I'm a freakin' mess. No one wants to, to deal with this crap." She confessed. "He's going to find out and run."
"I told you I wasn't going to run away from you, JJ." A new voice spoke quietly, causing both girls to raise their heads in that direction. "What happened, babe? Someone said you were freaking out."
Dropping her head onto Emily's shoulder, JJ sniffled and squeezed her eyes closed again. "Doug showed up again and, and…"
"JJ spoke her mind." Emily finished. "It's complicated, Derek. And I know you're probably frustrated but we need you to be okay with this. It will make sense in a few days."
"A few days?"
"We have something important to take care of tomorrow." Emily informed him. "And it's going to …"
"Cause a lot of problems." JJ opened her eyes to meet his concerned gaze. "I'm sorry, Der. I told you I'm a mess. If you want to -."
"If the next word out of your mouth is leave, Jennifer Jareau, I'm going to scream." He interrupted, grabbing her free hand in his. "I told you once and I'll tell you again. I don't want to leave. I'm not going to leave. You couldn't force me to leave. Everyone has their complications, I get it."
JJ sniffled again, picking her head up off of Emily's shoulder and rolling her lips together. "Do you mean it? One hundred percent?"
"Yes. One hundred and fifty percent. JJ, please, believe me." He all but begged.
Nodding, JJ squeezed her boyfriends' hand and smiled before turning to Emily. "Let's go back to the room. Go get Spencer."
Knowing she wanted a minute with Derek, Emily climbed to her feet and headed back inside to find her own boyfriend.
"Are you okay, babe?" Derek asked sincerely. "Do we need to call someone? Your parents? The Dean? Local authorities?"
JJ shook her head. "I'm sorry for putting you through this, Derek. I, we're going to deal with it tomorrow. In the morning. Can we talk about it tomorrow night? After your practice gets out?"
"Of course." He nodded, pulling JJ into his arms and holding her tightly while they waited for Emily and Spencer to return.
"Thank you." She whispered into his ear, wrapping her arms around him tightly before kissing his cheek.