The boys lay in bed enveloped by their dreams. Not dream bubbles, but actual dreams; the windows to their own minds, and fears, and aspirations.

Karkat was currently dreaming of his ideal life on Alternia. As a threshecutioner, respected by those around him, no caste system holding him back. After a hard day at work he returned to his hive to find his human matesprit sobbing. No, what happened. He rushed to the boy's side, asking what happened, was he hurt? Did someone attack him? Is he okay? All he received tremulous chant "Please, don't hurt me. I'm sorry. Please, I'm sorry." Over and over again.

"Dave! It's okay, I won't hurt you, I love you Dave. Please look at me." The boy refused to move his head from his hands though; shaking and fearful all he could do was mutter non-sensical apologies and pleads for leniency. Karkat was yelling, begging his matesprit to look at him, talk to him. What happened? It will be okay, he loves his matesprit, he will protect him; not hurt him. The sounds from both males only seemed to grow, creating a cacophony of discordant sounds; overwhelming the senses. The world was shaking and chaotic…it wasn't real. It wasn't real. It wasn't real.

And Karkat awoke with a jump. Just a dream. Breathe, just a dream. Only the cries weren't a dream. He could still hear them. He rolled over, now facing his human boyfriend. Dave was whimpering in his sleep; practically choking on his own tears, gasping for breath as he uttered pleas for mercy "Please don't hurt me. I'm sorry. I'll try harder. Sorry. Sorry. No more. Please, no more." It wrenched Karkat's heart, the boy whom always had a stoic mask on around others; hell even around himself sometimes; was now a blubbering mess and sounded so very scared. How do you comfort a human? If he were a troll, Karkat would gently stroke his horns to calm him down; but Dave didn't have horns. What to do? What does he do in this situation? The blood player lightly place his hand on the blonde's shoulder, trying to wake him without alarming him. C'mon, it's not real. He's here, it's okay. Unfortunately for Karkat; Dave's reflexes were too honed for that kindness. Dave instinctually punched the owner of the hand that touched him; not aware of where or when he was for several moments. He was panting, wild eyed, not that anyone could see it under the shades; yes, he always wore his shades, even to bed, for this very reason.

Karkat clutched his face, damn, the boy could really hurt someone when he wanted to. The troll wasn't angry, just a little caught off guard. After a moment or two to recover he looked at his boyfriend. The time player was trembling, hyperventilating, and perhaps a little disoriented. Karkat reached out once more, petting his hair, whispering reassurances "You're safe, it's not real. Talk to me Dave. It's okay." Dave's breaths started to become slower and more rhythmic. He looked over, seeing the damage he had done to the troll's face. Reaching out, tenderly caressing the bruise that was already starting to form, eyebrows raised from behind his shades.

"It's okay, don't worry about it." Karkat didn't care about his face right now, he wanted to know what caused that emotional state. Dave just grabbed him, squeezing him so tight in almost hurt. Karkat recovered quickly and returned the hug, sweet nothings creating a soothing echo in Dave's ear. When they finally separated Karkat had to ask, "Dave, what the fuck happened? What was that dream about?"

Dave turned his head away, ashamed of his emotional display. Karkat wasn't letting him get away though; he gingerly took hold of the human's chin and steered it back to face him once more. Those damn shades; they needed to go. Karkat respected Dave's need for them; but right now they were counter-productive. "I'm going to take off your shades, okay?" Dave didn't say anything, somewhat lost in his own mind, partially just so vulnerable and pliable in that moment that he would do anything Karkat said; he trusted him, Karkat wouldn't hurt him.

Yet, as Karkat removed his shades a new tidal wave of anxiety washed over him; turbulent and menacing, filled with trepidation about possible rejection. Never had anyone seen his eyes. He shut them tight, worry and dread about the inevitable reveal filling his heart and mind, adding to the discordance of his mental state. This wasn't happening, all of this was fake, a trick of the mind, the lights, the sound. Nothing is real, he isn't real, he isn't here. The defense mechanism in full force, just like when he lay battered and discolored after strifes with bro, no tears, tears make it worse, don't be a wuss.

Karkat couldn't see much of the clamor of thoughts crowding Dave's mind, the din which prevented him from achieving any true level of ease. Still, there was an intuitive understanding. Karkat couldn't place it, but he just felt the impending need to shower Dave with affection. The troll rose to his knees, cupping his matesprit's naked face in his hands. Kissing the eyelids, the nose, the mouth, the jaw, the ear, the cheek of his panicked darling. Yes, darling, Dave was his to hold and comfort and love. The trail of tears left down Dave's face, Karkat kissed them away, the heat from his lips evaporating them in an instant.

Dave was floating, that's the only way he could phrase it. Floating between the warmth of the comfort he was receiving and the cold brutality of his nightmare. He was only four during their first strife. How giant Bro appeared to the young boy's small stature. He didn't know how to fight yet, Bro had just given him a sword; no warning. How he cried and begged for mercy, the strife felt like it lasted for hours. He tried to run, but where could he go? The apartment was small and he couldn't reach the lock that barred him from the outside world. At the end Dave was just curled in a ball, crying hysterically, Bro was taking notes; "We have a lot to work on; I suggest you stop crying. I didn't hurt you." It's true, there were no broken bones, no bruises, some stinging from a few slaps of the sword, some ache from being thrown backward…but he was a little boy. It still hurt, even though the evidence had faded from his body. What did he do? He'll be good, just tell him what to do…

"Dave? Come back, what's wrong? Please open your eyes and talk to me."

And Dave was finally planted in the world of the living, not the dead former him in his dreams. The living, the survivor, one whom still had some control of his fate. He opened his eyes.

Karkat let out a soft gasp. The incarnadine glass looking back at him. The glossy quality of them clearing as he watched. The water that had threatened to spill over, receding back into the sockets. He saw his own self-loathing, his own fear of judgement, his own vulnerability reflected back at him through those eyes. My dear, is this the pain I cause you? This ache you feel for another, wishing to heal their wounds. Karkat leaned forward, brushing his lips against Dave's; and the blonde reciprocated with a desperate fervor. Wanting nothing more than to forget his thoughts, forget his life and exist only in the moment. Was it because he was a time player that he must constantly revisit not only his own past, but those of the other timelines as well? It haunted his dreams like a plague, infecting his mind, an unwelcome parasite to his well-being. Karkat pulled back after a few minutes, returning to the silent eye contact; he had never seen the knight of time so vulnerable. "You want to talk about it?"
"Maybe later. Cuddles now." And so Karkat gave him what he needed, they could talk later.

****Linda065cliva:

Thank you! I'm so glad you are enjoying the series! ^-^***