Title: This Tear
Author: SydGillyKC
Author's Notes: Here's chapter ten guys! Keep up the reviews! I'm having such an anxious time lately, waiting for all my college decisions that should start coming soon, so these reviews definitely help cheer me up during my time of anxiety lol. So thank to everyone who's reviewed so far, keep it up! And to those of you who are reading but not reviewing, now's a great time to start lol (. Hope you enjoy this chapter!
* * * * * * * * * * * *
"Syd, are you okay?" She heard Vaughn asked. She tried to nod, but only kept coughing. He moved his hand so that it was rubbing her back. It was another minute or two before, finally, her coughing fit subsided. She brought her hand away from her mouth and was surprised at what she saw.
Blood.
"Oh my God. Syd."
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Chapter 10: Unnatural Silence
Sydney was speechless. She felt frozen. She didn't know what to say. It took her a moment to snap out of her shock and do something. Without looking back at Vaughn, she reached out and turned the water on in the sink. She washed her hands off before taking a paper cup from the stack next to the sink and filling it with water. She washed out her mouth before taking a few sips and letting the cool liquid soothe her throat.
"I'm going to go get Dr. Anderson," Vaughn said, turning to the door.
"Vaughn, wait!" She said urgently, reaching out and grabbing his arm to stop him. He turned to face her. "It's what, 3 in the morning?"
"Closer to four, actually," he said, checking his watch.
"He'll be up early to take me for testing anyway. I feel okay right now. There's no use waking him up. We can just as easily tell him in a few hours. There's nothing he can do until I'm tested anyway," she reasoned with him.
"I don't know Syd. what if it gets worse?" He asked her, his voice full of concern.
"Okay, look, if it happens again, we'll wake him up. But I promise you, beside a soar throat, I feel fine right now. There's no use waking him," she insisted. Vaughn sighed.
"Fine. but you should at least go lie down in your bed until then. And if you start coughing again, blood or not, I want you to come get me immediately, okay?"
"Okay," she replied. He continued to look at her, his eyes holding so many emotions. She forced herself to look away. She paused for a moment before walking out of the bathroom and heading to her bedroom to lie back down. Vaughn watched her retreating form, praying with everything in him that she would be okay.
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Sydney awoke slowly, her senses coming to awareness one by one. She was aware before she opened her eyes that her chest felt heavy, making it slightly more difficult than normal to breathe. Then she remembered. the blood. She had to go in for testing today. She groaned, dreading spending an entire day at the hospital. Even more, she dreaded what the tests would tell them. Normal, healthy people didn't cough up blood. And though her brain tumor ruled her out of that category, she didn't quite understand how the two could be connected. A brain tumor shouldn't be effecting her chest and lungs.
Sighing, she threw off the covers and sat up. She took a deep breath, trying to eliminate the feeling of heaviness on her chest before standing up. She went over to her closet and found her suitcase inside. She silently wondered who'd packed it for her. It had a number of her clothes and personal belongings. Whoever had packed it, she was grateful to them. She pulled out some clothes and a bag of toiletries and headed into her bathroom. When she emerged, she instantly felt better, having showered, dressed, and even put on a bit of make-up. She finally felt human again. A day of testing should end that fairly quickly, she though to herself.
She left her room and headed towards the kitchen, instantly hearing the voices of all three men living in the house with her. They were all seated at the table. Even from across the room, she could see the serious expressions on their faces. She knew they were most likely discussing her. She debated silently whether to do what came naturally and listen to what they were saying before they noticed her or whether to announce her presence and not hear what she was sure she didn't really want to hear. She opted for the latter. She walked up to the table. Vaughn, as usual, noticed her first.
"Hey, Syd, you're up. How'd you sleep?" He asked her, as the conversation the three were having instantly came to a halt. She smiled at their obviousness and sat down in the empty chair across from Vaughn.
"I slept fine," she replied, wondering how much Vaughn had already told the doctor about the incident earlier that morning.
"I told Dr. Anderson about the blood you coughed up earlier," Vaughn told her, as if reading her mind. She nodded, turning to Dr. Anderson.
"I'm guessing that's not normal," she said to him.
"Not quite. At this point, I could only guess as to why that happened, but we'll make sure to do some specific tests to find out," Dr. Anderson assured her. "How do you feel now?"
"Fine. When did you want to leave for the hospital?" She asked.
"Whenever you're ready," Dr. Anderson replied.
"I'm ready as I'll ever be."
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Vaughn silently stared at the door Sydney had just gone through. He hated so much that she had to go through this. He hated even more that he couldn't at least be there with her. Being seen in public together was too much of a risk. Her going to the hospital was quite risky in itself, but that risk was unavoidable.
"She just went for testing, you know. She'll be back in a few hours," Weiss said suddenly, causing Vaughn to snap out of his daze and realize he must've been staring at the door for a little too long.
"I know, it's just." Vaughn trailed off, unsure of how to express how he felt.
"Yeah, I get it. You're worried about her," Weiss said sympathetically. Vaughn just looked at his friend, knowing there was no need for him to confirm that he was worried about Sydney. That pretty much went unsaid.
"It just scared me when she coughed up all that blood. It was pretty bad," Vaughn admitted, not meeting Weiss's eyes.
"I'd imagine it was if it woke you up all the way down the hall," Weiss commented. Vaughn immediately bit his lip and looked at the ground, reminding Weiss a child who'd been caught sneaking into the cookie jar. "Mike. I know that look. Did I miss something?" Weiss asked, eyeing Vaughn suspiciously.
"I wasn't exactly in my room," Vaughn admitted, still not meeting Weiss's eyes.
"Don't even tell me you were-"
"No!" Vaughn said hastily, cutting Weiss off. "No, it's nothing like that. We were just watching some movie on TV and we both fell asleep on the couch. It was nothing."
"Uh-huh," Weiss said sarcastically.
"Don't even start. She's sick and she just had to abandon her entire life. She needs a friend right now, that's all," Vaughn argued.
"Okay, Mike. You just keep telling yourself that."
Vaughn shook his head at Weiss, muttering something about how impossible his friend was before he walked out of the room.
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Sydney removed her coat and shut the door behind her. It had been an incredibly long day of testing. After four hours of sitting around waiting for the next vial of blood to be drawn or the next X-ray to be taken, she was finally done with the testing. Dr. Anderson told her that he had to go over the tests himself and get a radiologist to go over the MRI images with him. Since he knew that would take several more hours, he told Sydney to take the car and drive home. He said when he had all the results, he'd get his friend, also a doctor at the hospital, to drop him off at his house so he could get his own car.
She suddenly saw Vaughn walk down the hallway and into the room. She smiled at him. "I thought I heard someone come in," he said. "How'd the tests go?"
"Okay," she replied.
"Any results yet?"
"Not yet. Dr. Anderson's at the hospital still to get them, though. He said it would take a few hours." Vaughn nodded. "Where's Weiss?" She asked.
"Grocery shopping," Vaughn replied.
"As if we don't have enough food here already," Sydney said sarcastically.
"Apparently not enough for him," Vaughn joked. Sydney giggled. Then, suddenly, her face grew serious. "What is it?" Vaughn asked her, concerned.
"Oh, no, it's just. I realized that, even with everything that's going on right now, this is probably the most normal I've lived in a long time," she explained.
"Funny how it works out like that, huh?"
"Yeah," she said, looking at him for a moment before walking over to the couch and sitting down. He followed her almost immediately, sitting down next to her. He looked over at her, waiting for her to say something. She didn't meet his gaze, though, but looked down at the ground instead. "Do you think we'll ever see them again?" She asked suddenly. There was no need to ask who she was talking about.
"Eventually. SD-6 won't be around forever," Vaughn assured her.
"But without me or my dad working as double agents to take them down, there's nothing significant working against them anymore," she said, her voice low.
"The CIA is working on that. They're not going to halt their efforts against SD-6 just because they're onto us. They've still got your dad and all that he knows. I'm sure he'll figure out a way."
"What did they tell your family?" Sydney asked suddenly, surprising Vaughn.
"Um. Well, they didn't have to fake my death like they did yours. My mother knows the truth. She knows that I work for the CIA. I don't know much else, but I think she's telling the rest of my family that I'm on a long-term assignment in some foreign country. I don't know the specifics," he explained.
"I'm so sorry, Vaughn," she said softly.
"This is *not* your fault, Sydney. Don't you dare apologize to me," he said firmly, his voice rising a bit.
"How can you say that, Vaughn? Had you never been assigned to me, had I not made them replace Lambert with you-" He cut her off before she could finish by reaching over and laying a hand on her arm. She stopped and looked at him.
"You know as well as I do that there were a million times I could've chosen to be reassigned. I could've declined being your hander in the first place. This was as much my choice as it was yours, if not more. I don't regret a day of it. I don't doubt that I'm right where I should be."
His speech had caused tears to rise in her eyes. Blinking them back, she focused on his face. He smiled at her tentatively. She didn't try to speak, the combination of the lump in her throat and the tightening that was starting to return in her chest making it too difficult. She smiled back and slowly leaned towards him, wrapping her arms around his neck. She felt his arms come around her waist instantaneously. She tightened her grip on him and closed her eyes, trying to forget about the tightening in her chest and focus simply on how it felt to be in his arms. She almost succeeded.
"Syd, are you okay? You're wheezing a little," Vaughn said softly into her ear. Sydney immediately opened her eyes. She hadn't even realized. She pulled away slowly.
"It's nothing," she said, hoping she sounded more certain than she felt.
"It's not nothing," he argued. She sighed and shut her eyes.
"If it is something, there's nothing we can do until we know. Let's just leave it alone until then," she requested, opening her eyes again. He looked at her skeptically a moment, but finally nodded.
Whatever was wrong with her didn't want to let her forget it, though. At that exact moment, she started coughing again.
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Dr. Anderson returned two hours later, a manila folder in his hands. Vaughn was seated at the table and Weiss was in the kitchen, putting a few things away. Both men immediately stopped what they were doing and looked up at the doctor.
"Those the results?" Vaughn asked, gesturing to the folder. Dr. Anderson nodded.
"Where's Agent Bristow?" Dr. Anderson asked.
"She started coughing again. I made her go lie down," Vaughn replied.
"More blood?" Dr. Anderson asked. Vaughn nodded. "Well, we should get her up. She needs to hear these."
"I'll get her," Vaughn told the doctor as he got up from his seat. He headed down the hallway and stopped at the door to her bedroom. He knocked softly, entering after he heard her muffled reply. He found her sitting up in her bed, reading. She looked at him intently.
"What's up?" She asked.
"Dr. Anderson's back. He has the results," Vaughn told her. She looked at him, her expression almost frightened. After a moment, she took a deep breath and closed her book. Without looking at him, she got up and walked over to him, pausing slightly before she walked past him, through the door. He followed her down the hallway and into the main room. They both sat at the table where Weiss and Dr. Anderson already sat.
"Did you find something?" Sydney asked, wasting no time.
"I did. I think I know why you've been coughing up blood lately. It was pretty much as I suspected. You have a tumor in your lung, Agent Bristow." Sydney was too busy trying to take in the information to remind him to call her by her first name.
"What exactly does that mean, doctor?" Vaughn asked before Sydney even had the chance. All three of the agents turned to the doctor and waited intently for his answer. Vaughn stole a quick glance at Sydney's pale face before looking to the doctor for his answer.
"Though I luckily didn't find any other tumors, that suggests that the cancer's spread to her blood-stream. We're going to have to start some more aggressive treatment. It also means she's going to need surgery as soon as possible," the doctor explained to them.
All eyes turned on Sydney. She simply stared down at the table, refusing to look up. No one spoke. The room went unnaturally silent.
To be continued.
A/N: Yaaaay, this part is done. I swear, I worked on this every spare second when I wasn't working on the two English papers I had to write this week. It took me a long time, but it's here, thank God. I hope you liked it, please review! I've been stressed out all week and I'm really looking forward to a nice relaxing weekend, reading lots of reviews, and working non-stop on the next part. Enough reviews could definitely motivate me to get it up tomorrow or Saturday. So hit that little button and review! Thanks guys (.
Author: SydGillyKC
Author's Notes: Here's chapter ten guys! Keep up the reviews! I'm having such an anxious time lately, waiting for all my college decisions that should start coming soon, so these reviews definitely help cheer me up during my time of anxiety lol. So thank to everyone who's reviewed so far, keep it up! And to those of you who are reading but not reviewing, now's a great time to start lol (. Hope you enjoy this chapter!
* * * * * * * * * * * *
"Syd, are you okay?" She heard Vaughn asked. She tried to nod, but only kept coughing. He moved his hand so that it was rubbing her back. It was another minute or two before, finally, her coughing fit subsided. She brought her hand away from her mouth and was surprised at what she saw.
Blood.
"Oh my God. Syd."
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Chapter 10: Unnatural Silence
Sydney was speechless. She felt frozen. She didn't know what to say. It took her a moment to snap out of her shock and do something. Without looking back at Vaughn, she reached out and turned the water on in the sink. She washed her hands off before taking a paper cup from the stack next to the sink and filling it with water. She washed out her mouth before taking a few sips and letting the cool liquid soothe her throat.
"I'm going to go get Dr. Anderson," Vaughn said, turning to the door.
"Vaughn, wait!" She said urgently, reaching out and grabbing his arm to stop him. He turned to face her. "It's what, 3 in the morning?"
"Closer to four, actually," he said, checking his watch.
"He'll be up early to take me for testing anyway. I feel okay right now. There's no use waking him up. We can just as easily tell him in a few hours. There's nothing he can do until I'm tested anyway," she reasoned with him.
"I don't know Syd. what if it gets worse?" He asked her, his voice full of concern.
"Okay, look, if it happens again, we'll wake him up. But I promise you, beside a soar throat, I feel fine right now. There's no use waking him," she insisted. Vaughn sighed.
"Fine. but you should at least go lie down in your bed until then. And if you start coughing again, blood or not, I want you to come get me immediately, okay?"
"Okay," she replied. He continued to look at her, his eyes holding so many emotions. She forced herself to look away. She paused for a moment before walking out of the bathroom and heading to her bedroom to lie back down. Vaughn watched her retreating form, praying with everything in him that she would be okay.
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Sydney awoke slowly, her senses coming to awareness one by one. She was aware before she opened her eyes that her chest felt heavy, making it slightly more difficult than normal to breathe. Then she remembered. the blood. She had to go in for testing today. She groaned, dreading spending an entire day at the hospital. Even more, she dreaded what the tests would tell them. Normal, healthy people didn't cough up blood. And though her brain tumor ruled her out of that category, she didn't quite understand how the two could be connected. A brain tumor shouldn't be effecting her chest and lungs.
Sighing, she threw off the covers and sat up. She took a deep breath, trying to eliminate the feeling of heaviness on her chest before standing up. She went over to her closet and found her suitcase inside. She silently wondered who'd packed it for her. It had a number of her clothes and personal belongings. Whoever had packed it, she was grateful to them. She pulled out some clothes and a bag of toiletries and headed into her bathroom. When she emerged, she instantly felt better, having showered, dressed, and even put on a bit of make-up. She finally felt human again. A day of testing should end that fairly quickly, she though to herself.
She left her room and headed towards the kitchen, instantly hearing the voices of all three men living in the house with her. They were all seated at the table. Even from across the room, she could see the serious expressions on their faces. She knew they were most likely discussing her. She debated silently whether to do what came naturally and listen to what they were saying before they noticed her or whether to announce her presence and not hear what she was sure she didn't really want to hear. She opted for the latter. She walked up to the table. Vaughn, as usual, noticed her first.
"Hey, Syd, you're up. How'd you sleep?" He asked her, as the conversation the three were having instantly came to a halt. She smiled at their obviousness and sat down in the empty chair across from Vaughn.
"I slept fine," she replied, wondering how much Vaughn had already told the doctor about the incident earlier that morning.
"I told Dr. Anderson about the blood you coughed up earlier," Vaughn told her, as if reading her mind. She nodded, turning to Dr. Anderson.
"I'm guessing that's not normal," she said to him.
"Not quite. At this point, I could only guess as to why that happened, but we'll make sure to do some specific tests to find out," Dr. Anderson assured her. "How do you feel now?"
"Fine. When did you want to leave for the hospital?" She asked.
"Whenever you're ready," Dr. Anderson replied.
"I'm ready as I'll ever be."
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Vaughn silently stared at the door Sydney had just gone through. He hated so much that she had to go through this. He hated even more that he couldn't at least be there with her. Being seen in public together was too much of a risk. Her going to the hospital was quite risky in itself, but that risk was unavoidable.
"She just went for testing, you know. She'll be back in a few hours," Weiss said suddenly, causing Vaughn to snap out of his daze and realize he must've been staring at the door for a little too long.
"I know, it's just." Vaughn trailed off, unsure of how to express how he felt.
"Yeah, I get it. You're worried about her," Weiss said sympathetically. Vaughn just looked at his friend, knowing there was no need for him to confirm that he was worried about Sydney. That pretty much went unsaid.
"It just scared me when she coughed up all that blood. It was pretty bad," Vaughn admitted, not meeting Weiss's eyes.
"I'd imagine it was if it woke you up all the way down the hall," Weiss commented. Vaughn immediately bit his lip and looked at the ground, reminding Weiss a child who'd been caught sneaking into the cookie jar. "Mike. I know that look. Did I miss something?" Weiss asked, eyeing Vaughn suspiciously.
"I wasn't exactly in my room," Vaughn admitted, still not meeting Weiss's eyes.
"Don't even tell me you were-"
"No!" Vaughn said hastily, cutting Weiss off. "No, it's nothing like that. We were just watching some movie on TV and we both fell asleep on the couch. It was nothing."
"Uh-huh," Weiss said sarcastically.
"Don't even start. She's sick and she just had to abandon her entire life. She needs a friend right now, that's all," Vaughn argued.
"Okay, Mike. You just keep telling yourself that."
Vaughn shook his head at Weiss, muttering something about how impossible his friend was before he walked out of the room.
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Sydney removed her coat and shut the door behind her. It had been an incredibly long day of testing. After four hours of sitting around waiting for the next vial of blood to be drawn or the next X-ray to be taken, she was finally done with the testing. Dr. Anderson told her that he had to go over the tests himself and get a radiologist to go over the MRI images with him. Since he knew that would take several more hours, he told Sydney to take the car and drive home. He said when he had all the results, he'd get his friend, also a doctor at the hospital, to drop him off at his house so he could get his own car.
She suddenly saw Vaughn walk down the hallway and into the room. She smiled at him. "I thought I heard someone come in," he said. "How'd the tests go?"
"Okay," she replied.
"Any results yet?"
"Not yet. Dr. Anderson's at the hospital still to get them, though. He said it would take a few hours." Vaughn nodded. "Where's Weiss?" She asked.
"Grocery shopping," Vaughn replied.
"As if we don't have enough food here already," Sydney said sarcastically.
"Apparently not enough for him," Vaughn joked. Sydney giggled. Then, suddenly, her face grew serious. "What is it?" Vaughn asked her, concerned.
"Oh, no, it's just. I realized that, even with everything that's going on right now, this is probably the most normal I've lived in a long time," she explained.
"Funny how it works out like that, huh?"
"Yeah," she said, looking at him for a moment before walking over to the couch and sitting down. He followed her almost immediately, sitting down next to her. He looked over at her, waiting for her to say something. She didn't meet his gaze, though, but looked down at the ground instead. "Do you think we'll ever see them again?" She asked suddenly. There was no need to ask who she was talking about.
"Eventually. SD-6 won't be around forever," Vaughn assured her.
"But without me or my dad working as double agents to take them down, there's nothing significant working against them anymore," she said, her voice low.
"The CIA is working on that. They're not going to halt their efforts against SD-6 just because they're onto us. They've still got your dad and all that he knows. I'm sure he'll figure out a way."
"What did they tell your family?" Sydney asked suddenly, surprising Vaughn.
"Um. Well, they didn't have to fake my death like they did yours. My mother knows the truth. She knows that I work for the CIA. I don't know much else, but I think she's telling the rest of my family that I'm on a long-term assignment in some foreign country. I don't know the specifics," he explained.
"I'm so sorry, Vaughn," she said softly.
"This is *not* your fault, Sydney. Don't you dare apologize to me," he said firmly, his voice rising a bit.
"How can you say that, Vaughn? Had you never been assigned to me, had I not made them replace Lambert with you-" He cut her off before she could finish by reaching over and laying a hand on her arm. She stopped and looked at him.
"You know as well as I do that there were a million times I could've chosen to be reassigned. I could've declined being your hander in the first place. This was as much my choice as it was yours, if not more. I don't regret a day of it. I don't doubt that I'm right where I should be."
His speech had caused tears to rise in her eyes. Blinking them back, she focused on his face. He smiled at her tentatively. She didn't try to speak, the combination of the lump in her throat and the tightening that was starting to return in her chest making it too difficult. She smiled back and slowly leaned towards him, wrapping her arms around his neck. She felt his arms come around her waist instantaneously. She tightened her grip on him and closed her eyes, trying to forget about the tightening in her chest and focus simply on how it felt to be in his arms. She almost succeeded.
"Syd, are you okay? You're wheezing a little," Vaughn said softly into her ear. Sydney immediately opened her eyes. She hadn't even realized. She pulled away slowly.
"It's nothing," she said, hoping she sounded more certain than she felt.
"It's not nothing," he argued. She sighed and shut her eyes.
"If it is something, there's nothing we can do until we know. Let's just leave it alone until then," she requested, opening her eyes again. He looked at her skeptically a moment, but finally nodded.
Whatever was wrong with her didn't want to let her forget it, though. At that exact moment, she started coughing again.
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Dr. Anderson returned two hours later, a manila folder in his hands. Vaughn was seated at the table and Weiss was in the kitchen, putting a few things away. Both men immediately stopped what they were doing and looked up at the doctor.
"Those the results?" Vaughn asked, gesturing to the folder. Dr. Anderson nodded.
"Where's Agent Bristow?" Dr. Anderson asked.
"She started coughing again. I made her go lie down," Vaughn replied.
"More blood?" Dr. Anderson asked. Vaughn nodded. "Well, we should get her up. She needs to hear these."
"I'll get her," Vaughn told the doctor as he got up from his seat. He headed down the hallway and stopped at the door to her bedroom. He knocked softly, entering after he heard her muffled reply. He found her sitting up in her bed, reading. She looked at him intently.
"What's up?" She asked.
"Dr. Anderson's back. He has the results," Vaughn told her. She looked at him, her expression almost frightened. After a moment, she took a deep breath and closed her book. Without looking at him, she got up and walked over to him, pausing slightly before she walked past him, through the door. He followed her down the hallway and into the main room. They both sat at the table where Weiss and Dr. Anderson already sat.
"Did you find something?" Sydney asked, wasting no time.
"I did. I think I know why you've been coughing up blood lately. It was pretty much as I suspected. You have a tumor in your lung, Agent Bristow." Sydney was too busy trying to take in the information to remind him to call her by her first name.
"What exactly does that mean, doctor?" Vaughn asked before Sydney even had the chance. All three of the agents turned to the doctor and waited intently for his answer. Vaughn stole a quick glance at Sydney's pale face before looking to the doctor for his answer.
"Though I luckily didn't find any other tumors, that suggests that the cancer's spread to her blood-stream. We're going to have to start some more aggressive treatment. It also means she's going to need surgery as soon as possible," the doctor explained to them.
All eyes turned on Sydney. She simply stared down at the table, refusing to look up. No one spoke. The room went unnaturally silent.
To be continued.
A/N: Yaaaay, this part is done. I swear, I worked on this every spare second when I wasn't working on the two English papers I had to write this week. It took me a long time, but it's here, thank God. I hope you liked it, please review! I've been stressed out all week and I'm really looking forward to a nice relaxing weekend, reading lots of reviews, and working non-stop on the next part. Enough reviews could definitely motivate me to get it up tomorrow or Saturday. So hit that little button and review! Thanks guys (.