Imperial City Library #4
Imperial City
Coruscant
Lando Calrissian gazed around at the twelve children sitting in a circle at his feet. They gazed back, some smiling, some with brows furrowed, all with total focus.
He looked back down at the holobook in his hands and began reading again.
"Luke was weakening, I knew that. But that indomitable spirit won through as he continued to battle, blue lightsaber against my red, as we struggled and fought. Beneath us, the catwalk shook with our blows. Around us, the winds howled. Below us stretched a chasm of darkness broken by distant lights.
With a careful push, I knocked him to the ground, stood over him, threatened him with death if he did not submit to my will. But with blue eyes blazing, he gathered his flagging strength and fought back, knocking my saber out the way.
A moment later, he broke through my defenses. His lightsaber crashed through the armor in my right shoulder, his blade caught my flesh burned long ago in the lava fields of Mustafar. With a roar of pain and rage, I raised my saber and ..."
"Baron Calrissian!"
Lando stopped, frowned, looked up.
The Twi'lek librarian was standing at the door, lekku twitching in the grips of some strong emotion.
"Yes?" Lando asked, pulling himself with difficulty out of his dramatic reading.
The library appeared to take a few calming breaths, then said with saccharine sweetness, "You have an urgent holocall in my office. Can you please come this way?"
Lando glanced at his comlink, startled. Oh, that's right, he had turned it off.
"Ok," he said, standing up, then looked down at the disappointed faces of his young listeners, "Sorry about that, kids. Another time."
"Aw ... I want to know how it ends!" a Togruta boy with blue montrals complained.
The librarian stepped forward, a muscle in her cheek twitching frenetically, "My assistant will fill in for the Baron now, children."
A red headed human woman in her 30's smiled at the children and said, "How about The Wondrous Wanderings of the Woolly Bantha Cub, children?"
There were cheers of delight from the younger ones, and Calrissian smiled a bit as he stepped out of the library meeting room and into the corridor.
That book was very cute.
His smile faded away at the sight of Twi'lek librarian, whose eyes were now gleaming with rage and disbelief.
"Are you out of your mind, Calrissian?" she demanded, "How could you read My Life as a Psychotic Sith Lord to a group of children under the age of eight?"
Lando frowned in bewilderment, "It's at the top of the best seller list, Madame!"
The Twi'lek actually banged her orange head against the wall punctuating her next 6 words, "IT IS NOT APPROPRIATE FOR CHILDREN, Baron Calrissian!"
The head banging seemed to have vented enough of her anger that she was able to pull herself back into sweet librarian mode. With a deep breath and a fresh smile, she continued, "Do you want those little ones to go to bed tonight thinking that their fathers might possibly chop off their hands? That is not the kind of idea you want to introduce to an impressionable youngling."
Lando blinked, still startled at the normally mellow librarian banging her head on the wall, "Luke and Lord Vader have a wonderful relationship now, so I don't think it is a problem. And that's clear at the end of the book ..."
"You don't know much about children, do you?" the librarian interrupted him, still smiling her librarian smile.
The man lowered his eyes slightly, "No, I don't, really. I just thought it would be exciting for them, you know?"
"Baron," the librarian sighed, "I very much appreciate that you loyally and faithfully come to read to the boys and girls every week. You're one of my best volunteers. But let's stick with more juvenile fare, shall we? The Exquisite Angels of Iago, the Very Hungry Rancor, those are all fine books for children. Leave Lord Vader's book for teens and adults, agreed?"
"Agreed," Lando responded, abashed.
The wild look in her eyes faded, showing he was forgiven, and opened the door to her office, "Your caller is waiting."
The dark skinned man blinked in surprise. He had thought the 'call' was an excuse to get him out of the room so the librarian could yell at him in private.
He clicked the holoterminal on. The image showed Han Solo, in the cockpit of his speeder. The images behind his old friend indicated that Solo was flying far too fast to be safe in the notoriously crazy Imperial City traffic.
"Lando, it's about time you answered!" Solo yelled. "I need you to get to the Palace right now! Leia's in labor!"
Lando blinked.
"Is ... is something wrong?" he demanded worriedly.
"No," Solo began, then yelped indignantly, "Idiot! Get out of my way. No, I think she's Ok but Vader's there and Luke says he's throwing a fit. I need you to come keep him company!"
Lando choked, "You want me to what?"
"Keep my father-in-law company!" Solo snapped back, "At least until Luke can get there. He's dealing with a Reekcat Horde issue that can't wait. I am going to be in the delivery room with Leia and Vader needs a friend."
"I am not a friend, Han!" Lando responded with a near howl. "The last time I saw Vader he looked me up and down and told me I was lucky to be alive. He definitely does not like me!"
"He likes you more than most people, Lando," Solo said irritably. "Look, I don't have time for this. You betrayed us at Bespin and I spent close to a year in carbon freeze thanks to you. You are going to do this. Come to the Palace and hang out with Vader until Luke gets there. Got that?"
Lando closed his eyes, wondering to himself what was worse, incensed librarians scolding him or old frenemies calling in favors, took a deep breath, sighed and finally said "All right, Han. I'm coming."
/-
Medical Bay #1
Darth Vader's Palace
20 minutes later
Lando stepped hesitantly into the small room off the main corridor of Medical Bay #1. Security was very tight, with numerous guards, mostly of the large and hulking variety, hovering in various corners and beside doors, all bent on protecting the Empress from holojournalists and enthusiastic assassins and anyone in between.
But Lando had obviously been expected. He had entered the public entrance of the palace to be met by a young, dark haired human woman who had greeted him with a near shriek of delight and quickly guided him into this room.
Based on his initial first glance, this was some kind of waiting room for family members whose loved ones were being medically treated nearby. Which was odd, in Darth Vader's palace. He didn't seem the kind of individual to care about random family members. But he had family members now. So maybe he had ...
Calrissian's hovertrain of thought got derailed as his eyes focused on the gigantic form of Darth Vader, who sat on a large chair facing away from the door and toward the transparisteel window; the view was incredible – Imperial City in all its frenetic glory. Next to the cyborg was R2D2, and the behemoth's left hand was resting on the droid's domed head.
Lando froze, unsure of what to do, only to be startled when the former Sith spoke.
"Calrissian, I am honored that you could join me."
Lando flinched openly at this reminder of Bespin. Gathering all his rapidly dissipating courage, he walked deliberately over to the window and turned directly to face the Dark Lord.
And then his face grew slack. Vader held a bottle in his right hand, and a tube snaked from the bottle into the lower reaches of Vader's mask.
"Uh, what's that?" Lando asked nervously.
Vader gestured slightly with his right hand and said irritably, "Corellian brandy. The best that money can buy. Not that it matters."
The Baron stilled, his mind racing.
"I thought that your mask, you know, had to be sealed or something," he muttered rather absurdly.
There was a growl from the former Dark Lord, which made Lando cringe slightly.
"I built C-3PO when I was a 9 year old slave. I'm entirely capable of refitting my mask so that I can drink alcohol when I wish to."
Calrissian perked up slightly. Perhaps this was an area where he and Vader could discuss a common interest. Until Luke showed up and saved him from this bizarre situation.
"Really? What's your favorite?"
The mask seemed more blank than usual for a long moment, and then Vader said dully, "This is my first drink in more than 25 years. I don't have a favorite."
Vader tilted his head to stare at the bottle, "What if she dies?"
Lando was briefly confused before he realized who the Dark Lord was referring to.
He took a couple of deep breaths and said carefully, "Leia is very strong, Lord Vader. And she has the very best medical care. I'm sure her delivery will go well."
Vader seemed to rock slightly, "Her mother ... her mother was also strong. And she died. She died! In childbirth. What if Leia dies? I can't bear it."
The furniture in the room shook, and Lando came to a sudden conclusion.
The kind of conclusion that would likely get him killed.
"Lord Vader, you shouldn't be drinking alcohol," he said boldly.
The black mask lifted to face Calrissian directly. Lando took a few experimental breaths.
Good, he was still able to inhale necessary oxygen.
"Others do, in times of crisis," Vader finally said in what could be construed, in another sentient, as a whiny tone. In the Dark Lord's bass voice, he sounded merely petulant.
"Other sentients cannot take down a building while in the throes of alcohol induced distress," Lando pointed out.
There was a long pause, and Vader nodded slowly, "You are correct, Calrissian."
The Baron waited with bated breath and a moment later, the tube separated from Vader's mask, then from the bottle. The bottle floated over to Lando.
"Perhaps you would be kind enough to watch over the brandy, Calrissian."
Lando nodded, incredibly relieved. A quick glance at the label made him start in astonishment. Brothers' First! A special brandy commemorating the Brother's Shockball triumph, and specially aged using radiative crystals from one of Corellia's minor moons!
The Baron sank down into a nearby chair, hesitated, then decided to go for it.
"Do you mind if I, uh, have a little?"
"Be my guest," Vader said absently, his posture still gloomy.
Lando glanced around for a cup, saw nothing, and decided to be barbaric.
He lifted the bottle (still more than half full) and took a long swig.
The first sip was like a jolt of lightning. His mouth was a confused maelstrom of potent alcoholic flavors, his esophagus briefly became a lava field. His brain promptly, and ecstatically, killed five million brain cells.
Heavenly.
"I'm a terrible father," Vader pronounced suddenly.
Lando lifted his eyes, considered, took another drink, then nodded, "Yeah, you are. Or were, anyway."
The Dark Lord swung his chair slightly, and the black helmet tilted so that the blank mask faced directly at the former administrator of Cloud City.
The alcohol was affecting Lando's courage, probably in very unreliable ways, because he continued, "I'm just saying it like it is, Lord Vader. Tortured your daughter twice, chopped your son's hand off, carbon froze your now son in law, not to mention providing moral support to that idiot Tarkin when your daughter's planet was blown up. You won't be getting any awards for Father of the Year, for sure."
His brain, which had been off in a corner relishing its alcoholic euphoria, caught up and managed to shut his mouth.
Probably too late, thought Lando gloomily, waiting to be strangled.
After a very long minute, during which Lando kept being surprised he was still breathing, Vader said, "Thank you."
"Uh, huh?" the Baron demanded incoherently.
Vader stood up now, all two meters of him, and moved closer to the window so that his right side was now facing toward Calrissian.
"My son is one of the most forgiving persons in the galaxy. I know he has forgiven me, I know he loves me, in spite of how little I deserve that. He had never berated me or accused me in spite of my myriad sins against him, against our family. My daughter has a more astringent personality, but she is so attached to her twin that she has held back most of her vituperative statements about my character. Solo, too, cares so deeply for both twins that he doesn't care to rock the spacecraft. And my officers and people are afraid of me, of course. Only Artoo is candid about my many transgressions. And now you have been as well. It is true, I am a terrible father, and I would rather be honest about it."
Lando took another long sip of brandy and leaned back in relief. Then his brow wrinkled.
"I would say," he said carefully, "that you were a lousy father, but now you are not."
"It hardly matters, Calrissian. I have wrecked both their lives."
"No," Lando almost slurred the word, then caught himself. "No, you haven't. Because they are ... they are amazing people, Luke and Leia. And Han too, he's amazing too. You can't ruin their lives because they are too strong for that. I mean, that gives you even more power than you've got, you know? And you wanna talk about being a lousy father, Ok, you were lousy. But me, I was a horrible friend too. I sold them out to you and Han was tortured on my watch. I'm just as bad as you are."
Vader turned now, his great head shaking slowly, "I gave you no choice, Calrissian."
Lando found himself shaking the bottle a little, then stopped worriedly. It wouldn't do for any of this golden nectar to spill.
"I always had a choice," he said, and closed his eyes, "always did. Could have said no. Yeah, you'd have killed me, but I could have. Could have warned them, could have tried to flee instead of taking them to that blasted banquet hall. I had options. I convinced myself I was ... doin' it for my people but really just wanted to save my own skin and my money. Yeah, I'm a rotten friend, too ..."
/-
Medical suite across the hall
"You're doing great, sweetheart," Han Solo said, his eyes filled with tears.
"The first baby is crowning, your Highness," the med droid said. "Please wait for the next contraction and push..."
/-
Vader's Palace, Main Entrance
"Knight Skywalker, let me take you up to the medical suite ..."
/
"It's a girl!"
"Shmi ..." Leia said softly, "Dear Shmi."
/-
Family medical waiting room
"She was an angel, Calrissian, an angel," Vader said, "My angel. I never deserved her ..."
The door opened, interrupting his enthusiastic Padme rant.
Luke stepped in, his eyebrows raised high.
"Are you all right, Father?" he asked worriedly. "I was picking up some weird Force vibes."
Lando raised the bottle in his right hand, a bottle which was now almost empty, "We're ... uh ... we're good, Luke. Jusht ... jusht talking about things we regret, you know? Like, you know ..."
"Bespin," Vader finished.
Luke stared incredulously at Calrissian, "Are you drunk, Lando?"
The older man stood up and swayed slightly, "Yep, I am. But ... but your old man ishn't. 'Cause I shaid he shouldn't. He was drinking ... drinking thish brandy and I shaid he shouldn't. So he stopped, gave it to me. I get drunk, I just get shtupid and shometimes shlur. He gets drunk, whole building comes down. Not good!"
Luke nodded carefully, "I agree, Lando. I think you were very noble to drink that brandy. Thank you so much for keeping Father company. But now maybe you should go home."
The Baron nodded, bowed slightly to Vader, bowed slightly to Luke, and walked carefully toward the door, "I'm shure ... shure Leia will be jusht fine."
"She's doing great," Luke said absently, as he signaled for a guard to come. "She's already had one of the babies and the other one is almost born."
"Great news ... great news ..." Lando slurred.
Luke grabbed the guard who had appeared, and said firmly, "See that Baron Calrissian makes it home safely. And do not let him drive."
The man nodded in agreement, and Lando did as well, "I reeeeally shouldn't drive."
Luke clapped his old friend on the shoulder and heard Lando prattling on to the guard as they disappeared down a hallway, " ... Do you like flapjacks? ..."
Luke turned back toward Vader, who was standing in an anxious position near the window.
"Your sister is well, then?"
"She's great, Father, just great. We've been in contact telepathically and I've learned some new words in Shyrriwook, I think. Whatever helps, right? The second baby is just being born now ..."
/-
Leia's medical suite.
"It's a boy!" Han said excitedly.
"Bail," Leia said, and leaned back against the bed in relief. Her body was trembling from exhaustion and pain, but she had never, in her entire life, been so happy.
A few minutes later, she and the babies were wrapped up in bed, with her husband on a chair next to her.
The two little faces, both red, both looking vaguely surprised, stared at her. She gazed back, her eyes filled with tears.
"Welcome to the big wide galaxy, little ones," Leia said softly, even as Han wrapped one long arm around her.
Author Note: Many thanks to Cywolf10 who gave me the idea of including a bit of Vader's book, starring his dramatic prose. Also, I'm with the librarian – Vader's book, regardless of how well it is or isn't written, is not appropriate for impressionable children. I think I'm going to take a break from this fanfic as I need to get back to finishing up the Importance of a Name. But if I think of more funny chapters, I'll come back to Galactic Shockball Championship. Thanks for reading and following and reviewing, and many thanks to my husband, who is my best friend and editor.