A/N: Set after 6x01 "The Savior". Outlaw Queen.
The light was too bright for a place so grief-ridden. The white of the walls was reflecting too much of it and blinding her while the black consumed it, looking like a void ready to digest her any second now. She rushed to the window and closed the curtains but the light was coming from the inside of the office. She turned around to look for the source but it became too bright, forcing her to close her eyes to protect them.
A wave of warmth passed through her, causing a stir in her frozen insides, and the light disappeared, leaving darkness behind her eyelids. Her eyes welled up with tears the moment she opened them, her lower lip trembling.
"Regina." A new wave of warmth flooded her system at the sound of his voice, thawing whatever ice inside her hadn't melted.
"Robin," she whispered, the tears spilling down her face at the sight of blue eyes that she thought she'd never see again. He was just out of reach but she was afraid to move, afraid to breathe lest he turned out to be just a vision, a fruit of her imagination.
He made the first step and the desire to hold him in her arms again overrode every thought and fear in her mind, pushing her to close the space between them in a few quick strides. She threw herself in his open arms, causing him to stumble a bit, but he was strong enough to support her weight which had already lessened in the few days he was gone. He wrapped her in his embrace, holding her tightly, but that didn't stop her hands from moving frantically over his arms and back, touching every inch of him to make sure he was really there.
"You're here," she smiled through tears, her fingers finding his face and stroking it. Her heart was pounding so fast that she was afraid it would burst to pieces in her chest.
"Neither of us is really here," Robin said but she didn't seem to hear him, her fingers tracing patterns on his skin absent-mindedly as she was drinking in the sight of him, her gaze wandering all over his face. "Regina," he called her name, snapping her out of her trance and locking eyes with her. "I came to tell you something but we don't have much time." His hold on her waist tightened when her fingers froze and the tears that had subsided filled her eyes again.
"No," she shook her head. "No," she grabbed at the collar of his jacket, drawing him closer, "I can't lose you again."
He caught her hands, coaxing her fists to open and let go of the fabric. "You won't." He brought one hand to his lips and kissed it as his gaze stayed fixed on her. The first tear that fell from her eye when it dawned on her that he was never there hurt worse than having his soul torn from his body. He let go of her hands, which landed limply on his chest, and cupped her face. "Don't cry, love," he said, his thumbs wiping away her tears. "You have to move on."
She shook her head again, grabbing at his forearms. "I can't."
"You should," he tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. "Don't hesitate and miss your chance like me."
Her brows knitted in confusion. "What..."
"I should've chosen you instead of Marian at the very beginning. My heart was yours all along but instead of giving it to you, I broke yours. Right here." He looked around, remembering all the quiet moments they have spent there. He missed feeling the warmth of the fireplace on his skin and the warmth of her love in his heart. Maybe making the right choice wouldn't have changed the ending, but it would've given him more moments to spend in her embrace and love her when she couldn't love herself.
"You gave your life for me. Right here." He had chosen her over himself without hesitating even for a second and it had cost him everything. All because of her. Every time the people who loved her paid for her mistakes. But not anymore. She'd gotten rid of the part of herself that was like a curse to those she loved. It was the right decision regardless of the gnawing emptiness inside her.
"And I would do it again if I had to." He wrapped her in his arms when the violent sobs started shaking her frame in an attempt to shield her from a reality he had no control over.
"I miss you," she cried into the crook of his neck.
"I'm still alive in your heart," he whispered soothingly in her hair while stroking it.
Regina woke with a start, her head turning instinctively towards the left side of the bed to find it empty and her hand brushing against the sheets to feel their coldness. Her body was trembling and she brought her hand to her cheek to wipe away the hot tear that fell from her eye. She knew the reason behind that tear deep into her heart although she didn't remember it. A hesitant ray of sunlight that sneaked in between the curtains drew her attention and she got up to pull them away and let the morning light in.