CARRY ON WAYWARD ROAD

SPIDERS IN THE WEB

CHAPTER 10

Sam came down the stairs to find Dean and Angel standing in the living room.

"Hey, Sammy, Angel and I are going to head into town, get some food for the house, you wanna come?" Dean asked.

Sam glanced back up the stairs, "No, I think I'm fine here."

"He's not being rude to you, is he?" Angel asked, shocked at Sam's answer.

"No, actually we were having a nice conversation."

"Conversation?" Angel repeated in shock. "Like one sided or like you were both talking to each other? He doesn't ever talk to anyone, not even me usually."

Sam gave her a smile. "As in we were both talking to each other, you know, a normal two-way conversation."

Angel was truly shocked now. "Hey, Sam, please, be careful with him. If he's talking to you, it means he trusts you, he's comfortable with you. He… he doesn't ever leave the house, when he does, well, the other people who know him, kids he went to school with, they just taunt him. They pick on him and even get physical. I wish I could get him to get out of the house, but…"

Her head dropped in sadness. "I understand, so I just let him be, I don't know what else to do. Everyone thinks he's a freak, but I know better, he's my brother and even if he was a freak I still love him and I would never want to see him hurt."

Sam nodded, understanding. He knew what it was like to feel like a freak. "I won't hurt him, I promise. In fact, I think I may have made a new friend."

Sam shifted his attention to his brother. "Hey, Dean, can I talk to you for a minute before you leave? In private?"

Sam and Dean walked into another room and quietly he hatched a plan with Dean that he agreed with.

The boys returned to the room where Angel waited.

"Everything okay?" she asked.

"Yeah." Dean reassured her. "I'll talk to you about it in the car." He said as he wrapped his arm into the crook of her elbow and walked her out the door.

Sam smiled as they left. He knew he needed to talk to Andrew more, find out about these monsters he's been drawing. Find out what he meant when he asked if that's why they were there. He walked back upstairs and knocked on Andrew's door.

"Andrew?"

"Yeah?" Came the quiet voice from within.

Sam cracked the door opened. "Can I come in?"

"Yeah." Andrew replied again.

Sam walked in the room and assumed his position on the edge of the bed.

"They went to town to get some groceries." Sam informed him, Andrew in turn gave him a confused look.

"It's not pay day." He stated, full of innocence. "we don't have money for food."

Sam's heart broke, he understood. "Well, maybe my brother is paying for it then?"

He kept his voice calm, knowing Dean had a couple different credit cards, one that he had just recently received. Andrew gave him a look, questioning why he would do that for them. Sam decided not to answer his puzzled look.

"My sister..." Andrew started, "She works hard, she uses all her money on me. She redone my room." He fanned his hand around the room. "Even put new carpet and windows in. She even bought me a heater. And she does what she can with food, it isn't much, but she eats at work so she says she doesn't need a lot of food at the house for herself."

Sam's heart sunk just a little more. He saw the look in Andrew's eyes, the look that said he thought his sister was lying about that.

"Yeah, my brother used to tell me similar stories growing up, sometimes, when money gets tight, he still does, but we don't have it as hard as we did when we were younger."

Andrew turned, facing Sam, fully interested in the knowledge of how much their lives were alike. Sam knew if he was going to get Andrew to open up to him he had to continue to be as honest as possible and give him way more personal information than he was comfortable with.

"I know, what it's like." Sam started speaking with a soft, almost sad, tone. "My mom died when my brother was 4 and I was just 6 months old. A… a monster killed her."

Sam couldn't believe he just said that, but to tell him it was a demon seemed like it might be a little scary to Andrew so he stuck with the words they had already spoke about.

"My brother raised me too. Our dad, he got obsessed with hunting down the monster that killed our mom. So, he was never really around. And now, well, now he's not around at all. He died, a couple years ago."

"Did the monster kill him?"

"Kinda, yeah, I guess in a way you could say that. But, even though he wasn't always the nicest person, because he drunk a lot, and that made him mean, but he still loved me and Dean. I know he did, and he…well, he let the monster kill him, in order to save Dean, actually. It's hard to explain but, one of them was going to die and Dad, he made the decision without discussing it with us."

"Did anyone ever find the monster? The one that killed your mom?"

"Yeah, Dean actually killed it, not long after Dad died. But, he did more than just hunt down that monster. In the process, he hunted down every monster he came across, and killed them, to protect innocent people. And, he taught Dean and me to do the same. It's like… a family business. Without the pay. But we help save people, help protect them. Because…"

Sam paused, making sure he wasn't talking too much, but Andrew seemed to have all his attention on the words Sam was speaking. "Most people, they don't know that monsters are real. They don't know what's really out there."

He pointed back toward the pictures on the wall as he said that. "But, you do. Don't you?"

Andrew just paused, looking up at the pictures he had drawn of the monsters. And shrugged his shoulders.

"It's okay." Sam reassured him. "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to. I'm not pushing you, I just want you to know, that I understand, you and me, we aren't so different. And, if you ever want to talk I'll listen."

"You'll think I'm crazy. You'll think I'm a freak, just like everyone else."

Sam wasn't sure how much more his heart could break. "I won't. I swear, I won't think you're crazy, or a freak. Some people, they think I'm a freak too."

"Does your brother?"

"No, well, not really. He jokes that I am, but he jokes that we both are, because of the life we have, because only 'freaks' would hunt monsters like we do. But, he doesn't really think that about me anymore than he thinks it about himself. He's been the one person who has always accepted me for who I am. The one person who had always loved me, no matter what. The one person I've always been able to depend on, no matter how much I screw up, or how scared it get. He's always there."

"Angel too."

Sam nodded his head, he knew that. Her and Dean, they seemed so much alike he couldn't imagine her not being there for her little brother. "She told me to be careful with you." Sam chuckled. "Said she didn't want me to say or do anything that would hurt you."

Sam just shook his head slowly. "That sounds so much like Dean! If I'm in an emotional phase or something happened that bothered me, or… well pretty much anything, he would say the same thing if our places were swapped. Sometimes… sometimes, I mean I love him for it, I know he means well and he's just looking out for me, trying to protect me, but, sometimes, it gets old. It irritates me, even when I know it shouldn't."

Andrew nodded his head with a slight smile. "I know what you mean."

Sam smiled back.

"My sister, she's always trying to protect me, like a mother hen. And sometimes, I wish she would just stop, I get tired of it. But, I don't tell her that because I know she means good. She's just doing what she thinks is best for me. She's always been that way. Always thought she had to protect me. Even when we were little. She would do everything she could."

It seemed like once Andrew had started talking he couldn't stop. "Our dad, he wasn't so nice either. I don't know if he drunk or not, but he was mean. I remember… I remember sometimes, when he came home, he didn't come home too often, he was always too busy with work. He didn't want to be around me anyhow. He hated me. He told me that enough times. He told me he wished I was dead, that he would have sent me with mom if it wasn't for my whiney sister."

Andrew paused, making sure he was still safe to talk, he saw Sam's understanding eyes. He wasn't judging, he was just… listening, so he continued. "I remember times Dad would come home and hit on me. Grandma, she would try to tell him to stop but he would just hit her too, so she stopped trying. He would come home with pictures of our mom. I don't really remember her, but Angel does, and the pictures he showed her made her really upset."

Sam knew all too well what it was like only seeing your mom in pictures. "They were pictures of what she looked like then, pictures of the torture my sister said they put her through. But, then Dad stopped beating on me, but I'm not stupid, not like people think I am. I know why he stopped. I saw the bruises my sister tried to hide. Angel and I, we shared a room and when Dad was home. They would think I was asleep and he would make her go to his room with him."

Andrew's eyes saddened. "I would hear her cry and the bed squeak. Sometimes, there were even muffled screams. He hurt her, instead of me, and she let him, to protect me." Andrew's voice was a mixture of sadness and anger. Sam knew it was okay to let out his emotions but, he didn't want too much anger to come out at the beginning.

"Yeah, my dad, my brother, pretty much the same. In a way. He, Dean, he would get beat and punished for things I did. He would try to hide it, but as I got older, I noticed the bruises and cuts on his body. Dad had these, training exercises, that he would make us do, and Dean, he had to do them twice as much and twice as hard."

He hoped Dean didn't mind him telling Andrew these things. "I didn't know everything back then, but I've found a lot out just recently. He told my dad that he could do anything he wanted to him, that he wouldn't fight him on it, as long as he didn't touch me and didn't do anything in front of me, so I wouldn't know. And, for the most part Dad kept his end of the deal. He didn't beat on me and I was clueless until I was old enough to notice that things weren't right, but even then, I still didn't know everything."

Sam and Andrew seemed to settle into the conversation like old friends. "I didn't know that dad would make my big brother join him in bed while I was asleep. I didn't know how bad the beatings were. I didn't know that while I slept, my dad would make my brother run for hours, beating him if he stopped. I didn't realize Dad forced Dean not to eat, and when Dad wasn't around, if there wasn't enough money or food, Dean would make up some excuse as to why he wasn't hungry, but he always made sure I ate, even if he had gone days without food."

Sam couldn't believe what he was admitting to, but by the look in Andrew's eyes, it was exactly what he needed to hear. "But," Sam added, "we didn't have any grandparents, or any adults to take care of us, Dean had to do it alone. He had to figure out how to take care of a baby and everything on his own."

"I'm glad we had my grandma, at least Angel wasn't completely alone in raising me."

Sam just nodded, agreeing with that, wishing Dean had someone who could have helped him too.

"I think we turned out alright." Sam said. "We always had each other, and really, that's all that matters. Everything else is just… well it's just material stuff. But you can never replace your brother, or sister. Dean and I we never even had a home, we've lived out of the car or motel rooms or crappy ass apartments our whole lives. Never stayed at one place too long. But, no matter where we were, we were always 'home' because we had each other."

"I wish we could have moved around like that, not stayed in one place very long."

"Why's that?"

"Because, then maybe, people wouldn't think I was such a freak."

"Andrew, why do people think you're a freak?"

Andrew dropped his head again. "I can't say."

"Hey, it's okay, I promise, I won't think you're a freak, besides I'm one too, remember?"

Andrew gave a slight smile. "I see things, in my dreams I guess. Angel says sometimes I day dream, just stare off into space, or something like that."

Sam nodded his head, he understood more than Andrew could possibly understand. "And, what kind of things do you see in your dreams?"

Andrew shrugged, "monsters, I guess."

Sam knew there was more to it than that, but didn't want to push him too much. "Like the ones you drew?"

Andrew nodded his head.

"And, what do the monsters do in your dreams?"

"Hurt people."

"Who? And, how?"

"They hurt the people at the hospital that my mom was at. They killed people, different monsters, different ways. Some of them… well… some of them would just make people so scared that it would kill them. Some of them, I saw… I saw them take their hands, with claws for nails, and rip their hearts out, I saw them still beating in their hands until they died." Andrew looked scared, like he was seeing it all happen again.

Sam moved over on the edge of the bed so he was beside him. He pulled the chair Andrew was sitting on so he was right in front of him, he then reached out and wrapped both arms around him, embracing him in a hug, giving him some much-needed physical support.

"Andrew, it's okay, as long as I'm here, as long as Dean is here, nothing is going to hurt you, okay? Those images in your head, that's all they are. I know they seem real, and they might actually be real, but the hospital is shut down now, so, no one is being hunted by them anymore, okay? It's okay it's all in the past."

Andrew had started crying into Sam's shoulder and nodded his head, understanding what Sam was saying as truth. He wrapped his arms around Sam, leaning into the support he needed. He had never had anyone understand him like this before.

No one, even though his sister tried, no one ever came close to knowing exactly what he needed. But, Sam seemed to know, he seemed to understand. He knew that he needed the physical reassurance, he knew that he needed someone to talk to, even though Andrew didn't know that himself, Sam did.

Andrew, for the first time in as long as he can remember, felt safe, he felt truly safe. He didn't feel like a freak. He didn't feel like there was something wrong with him. He felt… normal. He wasn't sure how long he had cried for, but Sam was there the entire time. He never loosened his grip on him, he held him in his arms like Dean had done with him so many times before.

Sam did understand, he understood how badly he had wanted someone to understand him when he was going through his demon blood thing. Dean tried, he knows he did, but it wasn't like he could exactly understand. Just like, Sam couldn't understand exactly what all Dean had been through, even though he tries and he'll always be there for his big brother, but he can't truly understand it, not unless he's been through it himself.

But, this. This thing that was happening with Andrew. Sam understood. And, he knew Andrew understood him, even if he hadn't told him about the dreams he would have, Andrew would understand. There was something calming to that. Something Sam had never felt before. Something that made him not want to let go of the embrace he had with Andrew.

He knew it couldn't last forever, but he was willing to let it last as long as he needed it to. He was willing to speak whatever truths he needed to in order to make sure that Andrew didn't feel the way he did when they first arrived. He wanted, more than anything, for him to know he wasn't a freak, that there was nothing wrong with him, that monsters were real, and if he saw them, even just in his dreams, that was okay. There was nothing wrong with any of it.

Andrew loosened his grip on Sam, and Sam followed his cue. Andrew wiped the tears from his eyes, trying to dry his face on his shirt sleeve. Sam wiped both of his hands down his face, to wipe away any emotion that may be hanging around.

"I'm sorry." Andrew said, a bit embarrassed.

"For what?" Sam questioned.

Andrew just motioned to Sam's shoulder that had been soaked with his tears.

Sam just shrugged it off and gave Andrew a smile. "Ah, it's okay. No worries, besides, if I remember correctly, I was the one who put your head there in the first place. Besides, nothing wrong with letting some emotions out in the privacy of your friends."

He saw the flicker in Andrew's eyes as a smile crept across his face.

"Friends?" he questioned.

"Well, yeah. I would think so."

He hadn't realized Andrew never had a friend before. Another small break in Sam's heart. Sam patted Andrew on the shoulder after he was informed he was his first friend, ever.

"I feel honored." He said with a large smile.

Neither of them had realized Angel and Dean had returned. Not only had they returned, but together, they fixed supper 'for the kids' they joked.

"SAM, ANDREW, SUPPER'S READY!" Angel shouted from the bottom of the stairs.

They were both startled to hear her home, and supper? Ready? Sam and Andrew looked at each other with wide, excited eyes, they were both hungry.

"Race you!" Sam said, sounding like a 10-year-old again.

Andrew's grin covered his whole face.

"On your mark, get set, GO!" Andrew shouted as they both made a B line for the door, pushing each other out of the way, almost running over Angel at the bottom of the stairs and rushing to be the first to sit in a chair.

Secretly, Sam let Andrew win, but not by much, and if he was being honest, he wasn't sure if he would have won even if he didn't take it easy with Andrew. He had a lot more speed and strength than Sam thought he would. Dean and Angel both just shook their heads and laughed at each other.

"kids" Dean said with a chuckle.

Angel was surprised to see her brother acting that way. He was usually shy and slow, even around her. He was acting just like a kid, one who made his first friend, and finally had him over for dinner. Sam, well, he was just being Sam. That boy had seen enough in his life that he felt he had every right to be goofy and enjoy life when he got the chance.

"You never know what tomorrow holds" he would tell Dean when he tried to tell him to act his age. He gave up trying to understand his kid brother a long time ago. They all sat at the table and ate their supper.

"So," Dean announced. "Sam, Andrew…"

He was trying to make it sound like it was his and Angel's idea, that Sam had nothing to do with it. "You both need to get some sleep tonight, we," He pointed between him and Angel, "have some things for you to do tomorrow."

Sam knew what he was talking about but Andrew looked confused.

"That's right." Angel chimed in, looking at her brother, "you're going to get out of this house! Do some things outside tomorrow. There's a lot of things that need to be fixed up around here, and Dean was generous enough to buy some things we needed, so you and Sam are going to work on fixing them, outside, starting in the morning."

Sam groaned, again like he had no idea and disapproved, his groan was met by Andrew's, which made him pleased that it appeared they were on the same page.

"Hey sis." Andrew said.

"Yeah?"

"Can Sam sleep with me, in my room tonight?" he asked, again acting like a little boy, having his first sleep over.

Sam just shrugged his shoulders, like he didn't mind, and gave Angel a slight nod, telling her it was okay.

"Yeah, if he wants to, that's fine." she replied, giving Sam a thankful grin.

"Sleepover!" Sam shouted as he shoveled in the last bite of his food into his mouth.

Andrew was beyond pleased.

"But, first," Angel pointed to Andrew, "Shower." then moved her point to the bathroom.

Andrew dropped his head, "Okay, fine." he said as he ran upstairs to get some clean clothes and headed into the bathroom.

Angel waited until Andrew was in the bathroom before checking on him and Sam. "Everything okay between the two of you?"

"Yeah, I think he's just excited because I told him we were friends." He chuckled at that, at the pure innocence of Andrew, remembering when he was that innocent.

Angel smiled. "He's never had a friend before."

"Yeah," Sam agreed, "that's what he told me." He paused for a moment, switching his glance between Angel and Dean. "Um, I just wanted… I wanted to make sure… that it's okay…" He was stuttering, not sure exactly what he was wanting to say.

"Sam, you're stuttering, get on with it." Dean interrupted.

"I just wanted to make sure it's okay that we, me and Andrew, talk about you, both." Sam finally got the words out, both of them looking a little shocked and confused. "Look, he's… he's obviously never had anyone to talk to about… things… before, and I can relate, a lot, to him, but he's… he's told me some things, and well, I've told him some things, and we've gotten kinda personal, and since both of our lives evolve around our older siblings, personal means it kinda involves you guys too." Sam didn't realize he was blushing.

"I don't care." Angel answered, still a bit shocked. "Look, if you can bring my brother out of his shell, I don't care what you or he says about me. I just want him to be the happy boy he once was, before his nightmares started." She sounded sad at the last part.

"He's coming around." Sam reassured her, brushing at the still dampness of the shoulder of his shirt.

She was even more shocked. "He… he cried?"

Sam just nodded his head.

Dean was impressed, but knew how Sam could manage to get emotions out of someone that no one else could. "Sam." Dean chimed in, hearing the shower turn off. "You know how to handle yourself and what to say and not say in certain situations."

He then picked up a couple plates and walked into the kitchen. Sam nodded, even though Dean's back was to him. He knew that was Dean's way of telling him that he had permission to say whatever he deemed necessary.

Andrew came bouncing out of the bathroom. "All ready for bed!" he announced. "Ready?" he asked Sam.

Sam gave a grin. "Yeah, friend, let's go have our first sleepover!" He said as he followed Andrew up the stairs and to his room.