Admission

-Four Months Prior-

Bella lay tangled in the sheets of the bed looking at the man sleeping next to her. The sheet just barely covered his bottom half and she found herself entranced as she watched him sleep. His hair was tousled, more so than usual, and his mouth was slightly open. He snored, but that fact didn't bother her.

She rested her head against his shoulder, feeling the gentle rise and fall of his chest as he slept. It was calming, almost soothing her frayed nerves. She placed a gentle kiss on his chest before scooting out of bed and pulling his shirt on over her bare body.

Her feet made a padding noise on the hotel carpet as she walked through the room picking up items, folding and sorting them. Bella made her way into the living area before settling in a small chase that faced a window overlooking a small lake.

Resting her forehead against her hand she sat and stared out the window thinking about how she had lied, once again, to get free time. She was more surprised by the fact that it didn't bother her to do it, than the lying itself.

How easily Mike bought her story of a girls shopping trip.

She momentarily wondered what Edward had told his wife but then pushed those images out of her mind. It hurt too much to think about the fact that they were both living lives apart from each other.

It was becoming too hard.

The thought terrified and thrilled her. She knew she loved him, loved him to the very core of her being. And she could also tell that he felt the same way. Bella questioned herself constantly though, on how much of a relationship they could have that was built on all the lies they told.

Her thoughts were depressing.

She had tried so hard not to notice the fact that she counted down the hours till she could see him again. Tried not to notice that her every thought and feeling revolved around him.

She couldn't keep up this charade any longer.

The tears began to fall.

It seemed like only minutes later that she heard the steady thud of his feet against the carpet as he made his way through the hotel room looking for her. It only took him a moment to find her.

He didn't say anything as he lifted her up and placed her in his lap, his lips met her head with a gentle peck as he looked out the window alongside her.

"Don't cry." Edward whispered softly "Please, I can't stand to see you cry."

His face looked pained. She reached her hand over to gently run it across his face.

"You're so cold." Edward stated frowning softly "How long have you been out here?"

"Awhile," Bella whispered "I couldn't sleep."

He nodded his head in acknowledgement of everything that was currently being unsaid. "You should have woken me."

"You looked so peaceful. I couldn't bear to."

He frowned for a moment before running his hands up and down her arms trying to ease the chill that had settled in her body.

"I can't do this anymore, Edward" Bella admitted the tears forming once again as she heard his sharp intake of breath.

"What?" he asked softly. His voice shook as he spoke.

"I can't keep up this charade any longer, Edward. I can't and I won't. I love you so much, please understand."

His body went rigid beneath hers and she could feel his shoulders shaking.

"I love you too," Edward declared. Bella felt a few tear drops hit her head. "You need to do what is best for you, I will understand eventually."

She looked at him in confusion for a moment before settling on annoyance.

"Edward!" Bella exclaimed "That is not what I meant, I love you."

His face was now a mask of confusion, hurt and anger. "I don't understand, Bella. If you can't see me anymore that's fine but don't make this harder on both of us."

Bella let out a sigh and reached up placing her hand over his heart. "That is not what I meant, please don't be angry just hear me out."

He nodded, his eyes focusing on the ripples in the water as she spoke.

"I can't stop thinking about how much we have to lie to be together. How big of a toll this is taking on both of our lives. We can't keep doing this, Edward."

He opened his mouth to interrupt her but she placed her free hand over it and chuckled. "Let me finish!"

"I think about you even when I am not with you. Just the thought of you can make me smile, brighten my day. I count down the hours until I see you again. You make me feel alive, whole. I'm tired of sneaking around with you, tired of falling asleep to thoughts of you but not having you with me. When we go back home I am going to ask Mike for a divorce."

Edward's eyes locked onto hers. His hand reached up and gripped the one laying gently against his heart.

"I'm not telling you what to do. I'm not asking you to leave your wife, but I am making myself available for you and only you Edward. I want to fall asleep next to you and be able to wake up the next morning in your arms. I want to be able to call you and not have to worry about who is answering the phone. I want to be yours and for you to be mine. I love you Edward, unconditionally and irrevocably, I love you!"

She leaned in and placed a gentle kiss on his lips.

"I love you too, you know that!" Edward exclaimed a small smile playing on his lips as he spoke. "I have thought about us together so often that this just seems like a dream." He shook his head for a moment before an even bigger smile broke out on his face. "I love you!"

"You already said that!" Bella giggled smiling softly and trying not to let her nerves show through.

"I know, but I need to say it. You're leaving Mike?"

"Yes."

He smiled fully then and she suddenly felt her heart flutter. "I want you too! I want to be with you, I want to be able to call you mine. Oh, god I love you Bella. You make me so happy, make me feel so alive."

"Edward?" Bella asked smiling softly "Are you saying what I think your saying?"

"I'm leaving Tanya."

Special thanks to my beta meluvpirates! Thanks to all of you who reviewed, or added to your alerts or favorites!