Sorry that this update took so long. My gramma passed away and it took me a little while to get back into focus for writing. This chapter is a little shorter then usual, it's because it felt natural to leave it off where I did. I want to thank all of my readers and reviewers, you guys make me want to leave the one I'm with and start a new relationship with you!! Seriously you guys make my day!!

I also want to give a shout out to my beta Yuki Sakura-Chan. Check out her stories, they are awesome!!

Just a reminder I put the links to their outfits on my profile. Check em out!!

Disclaimer: I sadly do not own Twilight or any of the lovely characters. They belong to the wonderfully talented Stephenie Meyer. I do own the original story line and any original characters. But I do own: All of the books, soundtracks to both movies, Team Edward t-shirt, Twilight the movie, and used ticket stubs to Twilight and New Moon.

Last Chapter:

"Do you want me to come over? he asked after a long silence.

I sat motionless for a second, considering what he just asked me. Did I want him to come over here? I mean, I knew why I had called him. It wasn't to have him come over here. I just needed to hear his voice. I knew that I could handle talking to him on the phone and be friendly, but I don't know if I could handle a face to face with him just yet. I figured the next time that I saw him, it would be to discuss everything that he and Esme had told me. Was I ready for that conversation? No. I was at an all time vulnerable high, I don't think I could muster the anger and energy it took to have it out with him. But a smaller part of me wanted to see him; to see his eyes full of life, not the dead unstaring ones that were forever burned into my brain.

"Bella, are you still there," he said, breaking me out of my thoughts.

"Yeah," my voice was horse from crying.

"Do you want to come over, love?" he repeated the question; his voice had a desperate quality to it.

"I don't think that would be a good idea, Edward," I finally decided.

"Your upset Bella, please let me come and calm you down," he begged.

"No really Edward, I was upset when I woke up, but I now realize that it was a bad idea to call you," I said, my voice stronger now, no signs of the emotions that were still running rampant in my body.

"Bella please," he whimpered.

"I am so very sorry for waking you up at this ungodly hour, please apologize to Tanya also," I added the Tanya part in as a afterthought.

"Why would you apologize to Tanya for calling me?" he asked.

"Because it was very rude for me to call and wake you and your girlfriend up," I explained. Maybe Tanya doesn't sleep over.

"You think that…," he started, but I quickly cut him off.

"I am going to let you go, Edward," I said. I really didn't want to have this conversation with him now and over the phone.

"Bella, please let me explain something," his voice was becoming impatient.

"No Edward, I'm sorry for calling you. It won't happen again. Goodnight." I pushed the end button, cutting him off.

I threw my phone onto the floor and let out a groan. Why did I call him? That was a very stupid idea. I am an adult, just because I have a bad dream doesn't mean that I someone's reassurance. I rolled over and buried my face into my pillow, trying to find the sleep that now eluded me. Why did I have to have that dream, what was my subconscious trying to tell me. I knew that Edward was okay, I knew that he had an accident. Why does my brain think that it needs to conjure up these horrible images?

Flopping back over onto my back, I decided that I wasn't going back to sleep tonight. Tomorrow I would call Edward and make plans to sit down and talk about everything; then maybe I can get back to my Edward-free existence. I laid in the dark for a few more minutes trying to decide what to do until morning, I could get up and work on the manuscript I brought home or maybe get some house work done that had got neglected from being away this weekend. Before I could decided on anything a loud pounding started on my front door, causing me to shot out of bed.

What the heck, it's like four o'clock in the morning, didn't stop you from calling Edward my subconscious reminded me. Choosing to ignore my inner ramblings, I grabbed the bottle of mace that I kept stashed next to my bed and slowly creped out of room and headed towards the door. The pounding had softened to a light knock.

"Who is it?" my voice shook more then I wanted it too.

"Bella, it's Edward, open the door," his voice was harsh and angry.

I un-did the locks and threw the door open, there stood a very disheveled Edward in his pajamas. Once the door was open enough, he pushed his way past me, into the apartment.

"What are you doing here Edward?" I snapped; his behavior was totally pissing me off.

"I'm here because you called him crying." He snapped back, oh goody angry Edward is here to play.

"And I told you not to come over."

"And I don't care. I know that I told you that I would give you time to deal with everything that I told you. But I feel the need to clarify something, and since you wouldn't let me let me do it on the phone, I decided to come over here and make sure you listened." He ranted as he passed back in forth in my living room. His hand yanking through his hair, something he does when he is really worked up.

"Well get to it then Cullen." Patience was now gone, and I was on the verge of a rant of my own.

He stopped and turned his eyes onto me. "Do you think that I am dating Tanya?"

"What?" I asked in surprise, I wasn't expecting that of all things.

"I said, "Do you think that I am dating Tanya?"

"Of course."

"Why?" he asked, his facing showing signs of confusion.

"You are seriously asking me why I think that you and Barbie are dating? I mean you are the movie store together, and then at the club. Finally you are out to dinner with her and your parents. Why wouldn't I think that?"

He groaned in frustration. "I guess I could see where you would get that impression, I never really thought about it. It's not like we acted like we were together."

I stopped to think about every time I had seen him with Tanya, the video store, she wrapped her arm around his waist. The club, she grabbed his arm when he started to walk away from her. Then lastly at the restaurant, they weren't touching then. But Alice did make that comment to him about having a girlfriend. Why wouldn't he dispute it? Not only that, what is he trying to say?

"What are you trying to say Edward?" I repeated my inner ramblings out loud.

"Tanya and I aren't together Bella."

"But…you have to be," I said weakly.

"Why? Because you saw us together a few times? There could be no other reason for us to be out together unless we are together."

"But Alice accused you of having a girlfriend in the restaurant. You didn't deny it." My head was starting to pound.

"I vaguely remember Alice sprouting something off about a girlfriend that night, but I was so focused on you she could have told me that she was a man and I probably wouldn't have flinched," he reasoned.

"So you aren't dating her then?" I needed to hear it out loud again.

"No Bella, I'm not."

"Then why wouldn't your mom just tell me that the other day, then trying to be all cryptic." I was so sick and tired of the games these Cullens play.

"Hmm.. That would probably be my fault too. I need to start at the beginning with this," he said, sitting next to me on the couch.

"Go ahead."

"When I went back to Chicago, after coming home, I got a job bartending at a club. It wasn't the best job, but I made pretty good tips. Tanya also worked there as a promoter. We became fast friends, nothing more than that though. After about a year, Tanya decided to branch out and start her own promotion business. She offered me a partnership and since I was pretty fed up with bartending I became her silent partner of sorts. I was drinking pretty heavily then and it was better for the business to keep me in the background. I would go to the events with her and what not, but my name was never associated with anything. We have made a pretty good name for ourselves, once I got my drinking under control; I started pouring all of my time into the business." He stopped there; he had the look on his face, like he was trying to figure out what to say next.

"So you work together then?"

"Yes, Tanya was the first friend I made in Chicago. She stood by me throughout my drinking and recovery. She never gave up on me. She deserves some sort of medal for dealing with me and my bullshit"

I jumped up from the couch, I couldn't listen to this. Him talking about her never giving up on him, he never gave me a chance to stand by him. But she deserves a fucking medal for being there for him. I turned to him and he actually flinched at the expression I had on my face.

"What Bella? What did I do?"

"You asshole. She deserves a medal, you prick. I wouldn't have given up on you either, but obviously I wasn't worth giving a chance. What Edward, was I not blonde enough, or pretty enough. Sorry that I am not some super model look alike. Maybe if I was, I would have stood a chance in your eyes." I could feel angry tears welling up in my eyes. God I hate the fact that I am an emotional crier, no matter what I am, happy, sad, angry, I cry. "Since she is so great, why aren't you with her?" I spat out.

And there it was. The flash of anger that crosses his face right before he snaps. He stood up from the couch and closed the distant in-between us. Just as his face was inches from mine he seethed out "You are so much more than any of that. I am the stupidest fucking person for walking away from you. If I could go back and re-do one thing in my life, it would be that night. I would have crawled in bed with you and never left. I would have spent the night making love to you, instead of ripping my own heart out. You want to know why I am not with Tanya, and it's not because she didn't try. It's because I love you. I can never love anyone else. I can't see anyone else, you may think that Tanya is gorgeous, I suppose she is. But I don't see her, not like that. You are it for me."

I gasped and took two steps back from him. I…him…..I couldn't even form a rational thought.

"But your mom," I said weakly.

He thrust his hand through his hair again, causing it to stand on end. "Tanya may have alluded to my mom at a lunch the other day that she and I are together. I think that she is hoping that coming here would rid you from my system, especially when we saw you out with Riley. I haven't had the chance to tell my mom the truth; I will be doing that first thing in the morning." he explained, well that would explain why she was acting all cryptic, she wasn't really sure herself what was going on.

"Does Tanya know how you feel?"

"Of course. When she first broached the subject, right after I returned to Chicago, I let her know then that it was never going to happen."

"Then why would she tell your mom that," I asked, grasping at straws now. I knew that I was going to have to deal with what he said about loving me, but that was going to happen with copious amounts of alcohol and Alice and Rosalie present.

"Like I said, I think she was hoping I would change my mind. I think that she thought that she could get my mom on her side. That would never happen. I guess I am going to have to make that clearer to her."

The sleep that had eluded me earlier was now fogging up my brain. I glanced at the clock and saw that it was a little after five. Great, I have to be to work in just a few hours. Edward took a step in my direction, reaching his hand out he softly stroked my arm.

"You're tired."

"And you're a mind reader."

"You should go back to bed," he led me to the couch and helped me sit down.

"I can't, I have to be to work in a few hours."

"Call in. You need some sleep."

"I would if I could, but I have an important meeting," I said.

We sat in silence for a few minutes. I finally turned to him, deciding that it was time for him to leave. But before I could say anything, he opened his mouth. "Bella?"

"Edward?"

"I need to know something."

"Okay."

"Do I still have a chance?" he asked timidly.

"A chance for what?"

"With you," he whispered.

"Are seriously kidding me right now?" Anger swelled back up and the fogginess was gone.

"No, I am serious."

"You have to be joking Edward. You show back up after four years and think that and I'm sorry and I still love you, is going to fix everything? Did you honestly think that I was going to accept you back into my life with open arms?"

"No, I didn't think it was going to be that easy. I know that what I did was unforgivable, but I was hoping that maybe eventually I could prove myself to you and have another chance at making everything right."

"It's beyond unforgivable Edward and I am not having this conversation with you right now." I said, getting up off of the couch and walking towards the door. He didn't take the hint to leave though. He stayed planted on the couch like he belonged there.

"We are eventually going to have to have this conversation Bella."

"No we don't. You said your piece, now you can go."

"You can't run away from this forever," he snapped, jumping up off of the couch.

"That's hilarious coming from you. Didn't you define the term running away Edward?" I retorted.

He stalked across the room to me, stopping once again inches from my face.

"And look what mistake that was. Running away doesn't solve shit."

"There isn't anything to solve here Edward. I am with Riley."

"You can't be serious about that guy," he scoffed

"Why not? He is a nice guy," I countered.

"I'm sure that he's super nice Bella, but he's not your type," he said leaning in closer to me, I could feel his breathe on my lips.

"How do you know that?"

"Call it intuition."

"Well you're wrong, he is my type and I happen to have very strong feelings for him."

"Do you love him?" he asked, his jaw clenched and his breathes came out in short pants.

"What?"

"I asked if you loved him," he was impossibly close now, I couldn't see anything but his face.

"I….uh….we just started dating," I defended myself.

"So, you told me that you knew I was the one after our first kiss."

"And look where that got me," I snipped back.

And then his mouth was on mine. Biting and angry. At first I stood there in shock and then I went to push him away, but he was persistent, dragging his tongue across my bottom lip and I was a goner. I started kissing him back with the same amount of passion that he was kissing me with. It was everything I remembered and more. The electricity was there and he tasted just like he always did. I gasped a little and he took that as an open invitation to explore my mouth. Finally my brain caught up with my body and started screaming obscenities at me.

I yanked back and quickly stepped away from him. We were both panting heavily, trying to catch our breaths.

"How dare you?" I growled out.

He chose to ignore my anger. "Tell me you didn't feel it and I will leave you alone."

"Feel what?" I asked defiantly. I knew what he was talking about, the spark.

"You know damn well what."

"I didn't feel anything," I lied

"You were always a bad liar Isabella," he said with an amused expression on his face.

"And you were always an asshole."

"Just admit it," he demanded.

I tried to force another lie out, but I couldn't. Angry tears started to well up in my eyes again.

"Will you please leave?" My voice was shaking.

"Fine, but we will finish this conversation, soon," he relented. He took a step closer to me. "I'm sorry; kissing you was not my intention. But with that said, I won't apologize for doing it. The only thing that I feel bad about is hurting you and I am sorry if all of this is hurting you. But I won't give up on us, not until I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that you don't want me."

He then leaned in and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me into a gentle hug. I remained stiff and unresponsive. I closed my eyes and breathed in his unique scent. I felt myself wavering and it made me angry. There never was a black or white with Edward and I was sick and tired of all this gray. He slowly pulled away, stopping only to press a gentle kiss to my forehead.

I stood there with my eyes closed until I heard the door shut behind him and then I collapsed onto the floor, letting the tears finally loose. I laid there and cried. I hated these feelings that he made well up in me, I hated the fact that I hadn't been able to lie to him and tell him that I felt nothing and the thing I hated the most, was the I didn't hate him.

I hope that lived up to everyone standards, I am a little afraid of what y'all are going to say to me in reviews!! I can take it, I think. I know that this chapter is a little shorter than normal, but it felt natural to leave it there. Actually I will be sending out an excerpt from next chapter to everyone that reviews. I can only send it to signed reviews. So if you are reviewing anonymously then I won't be able to send you anything, So, sign your reviews and get a little treat!!! The next update will be up way earlier!! Have a great week!! Go on and review...you know you want to make my day ;)