Chapter 10

TThe earth smelled bad, sickly sweet yet…rotten, like death. Wet dirt, not quite mud, squished between her toes and made her gag, but she had to keep going forward. It was so dark. She tripped over roots, they seemed to move underneath her feet. Sap oozed out of the trees, the dark rust color of old blood. Smelled like it too, metallic copper that burned her nostrils and made her stomach turn. Something pulled her forward, urging, calling. She came to a clearing in the trees, dimly illuminated by moonlight. The moon itself looked wrong. It was too close, like a watchful predator's eye, gauging her every move. It was a sickly yellow-orange, like it was infected.

There were figures in the clearing.

Three children were on their knees, facing away from her. Their hands were pinned behind their backs, wrapped tightly with gnarled roots that reached up from the ground. The children were struggling weakly, tired and afraid, but the roots tightened around their tiny wrists the more they struggled. She trembled, stepping slowly closer. Too afraid but unable to stop. It was silent, except for the panicked breaths of the children, and the odd crackling of the roots. She had to keep going forward. She got close enough to touch the middle child's shoulder, but she couldn't. His flesh was so white, too white, his blue veins like angry rivers cutting through snow.

He struggled and turned towards Lucy. She stumbled backwards, trying to scream but no voice could be found, just her mouth trying to work as panic bubbled in her belly. His throat had been cut, the rust-sap trickling down his chin, his collarbone. He had no eyes. When he opened his mouth, there was only blackness inside.

"Youuuu didddd thiiiiisssss…" he wheezed. He struggled harder, trying to move towards her. The other two children turned their heads to face her as well, eyeless with cut throats.

"Youuuu kiiiilllledddd ussssss…" they said together.

Lucy tried to stand up and run, but as she lay stunned, the roots had wrapped themselves around her ankles, traveling up her calves, snaking up her thighs. Unable to scream, unable to move, she was dragged down, down into the death-earth, down into darkness below.

Lucy jolted upright, scattering blankets and her flashlight across the balcony. Something clattered over the edge, plinking against metal railings on its way down. Sunlight blasted her in the eyes when she pulled off a sleep mask Kevin had brought last night (or was it technically this morning?), creating a white haze as her pupils adjusted. She was covered in sweat, still gasping for air, blinded by spotted white lights, heart pounding.

It was just another morning, really. Well, she was slightly more hungover than usual. The dream in the woods always came, whether sleep came through pills, alcohol, or simply exhaustion. Lucy sat in a daze, piecing together the basics of who she was, where she was, and what she was doing. As the pieces fell together, she scrunched her nose and looked around, blinking to adjust her eyes to daylight. The sun had been out for a few hours, she estimated the time around eight or nine in the morning, and it was already getting hot outside. It was the longest she had been able to sleep, undisturbed by outside forces, in a very long time. It felt better and worse, simultaneously.

She peeked over the balcony and saw people milling around, drinking coffee and getting started with their day. Coffee! Her heart soared at the sound of their chatter, a sound she never realized she missed until she had heard it again. She felt that awful voice trying to tell her how little she deserved to feel happy, but she shoved it into a corner of her mind.

"Not today. I'll shut you up, just you wait," she whispered.

The little balcony was surprisingly cozy. Kevin had burst through the doors last night, barely able to see over the sleeping cot and bag, pillow, lantern, toiletries and clothes piled in his arms. Negan had resurfaced to give her a spare door key as Kevin helped her set up, grumbling about freeloaders and disappearing just as quickly as he appeared. She tidied up her little nook, rolling up her bed-things to tuck into the storeroom. She didn't know if she was going to stay. Best not get too attached. She was a ship without an anchor, cast adrift with no direction. But she was here now, might as well make the best of the situation and figure the rest out later.

I suppose it's time to go join the living.

Kevin had brought her a set of fresh clothes, surprisingly good choices that didn't look matronly or immodest. She lifted a lacey set of bra and panties with her pinky, raising an eyebrow. I doubt this was Kevin's doing, she chuckled to herself. Sure enough, unceremoniously shoved into a pair of black pants was a smushed (but unopened) pack of very average cotton panties and two plain-colored bras, functional without frills. Did Kevin add these before or after those lacey things stowed away in this bundle? The mystery of the day. She might even ask him, but feared he would just melt into a puddle of embarrassment.

Speaking of which, she needed to pee and she needed a shower. Desperately, on both accounts. She headed through the storeroom door, locked the entrance to her balcony and slid the key under a nearby box that coated in dust. She opened the storeroom door to the hallway, only to be met by a very startled-looking Kevin, who had been picking at a wayward thread on his shirt.

"OH! Hey. Uh, yeah. I'm s'pposed to… give you the ropes, show you a tour. Wait, no- I fucked that up. Give you a tour, show you the ropes. Orders from the boss." He grinned sheepishly.

"Alright…I gotta use the commode though, and really need a shower," Lucy said, shifting around the armful of items she was balancing. A pair of the cotton underwear dropped to the floor and she quickly snatched them up.

Kevin blushed heavily. Lucy placed him in his mid-to-late twenties, same as her, but he had the worry lines of an old man, and an unkempt stubble that tried desperately to be a beard. His blondish hair was always standing to attention, despite him constantly running his fingers through his hair nervously. Paired with his always startled looking eyes, he always looked like he'd recently been electrocuted. His constant jitters and fidgeting certainly didn't help argue against the case.

Kevin cleared his throat as they headed towards the stairs. "Uh, yeah. There aren't showers on this floor, not for-uh, ladies. We'll go downstairs. I'll, uh…wait nearby. But not too nearby. Not in a creepy way. A respectful nearby." Lucy had learned, through her limited experience with him, that trying to get Kevin to relax usually just made him even more nervous. It was easier to just roll with it, and maybe he would settle down in his own time. He certainly seemed less like a deer in headlights when Negan wasn't around. Lucy didn't blame him, Negan made her feel all kinds of things when he was around…

Ten minutes later, she was praying to the shower gods and thanking them for the religious experience she was currently having underneath the sweet, sweet water pressure. The cold water made no difference, it was still glorious. The healing power of washing away grime, dirt, blood, aches, and sorrows was intense. She had only been able to take a few showers since the collapse, mainly taking to jumping in rivers to clean off, the occasional tepid bath like the farmhouse, when she could find someplace that was off the grid. When that wasn't an option, a quick wipe down was the only other option, which never seemed satisfying.

How on Earth could Negan call me 'gorgeous' when I was so gross? Probably out of irony…

Despite the bath she had taken at the abandoned farmhouse, the shower could get into all the nooks and crannies and more. She could lather, rinse, AND repeat if she so desired, only mildly aware that Kevin was probably impatiently waiting, picking at that loose thread on his shirt.

Maybe it turned into a crop-top by now, she thought, suppressing a giggle.

She emerged from the showers with fresh clothes, brushed (and flossed!) teeth, feeling like a new woman. She hummed dreamily, a small smile on her lips, as she patted her hair dry with a starched towel. It was still stifling to be inside, but when she had a purpose it was much easier to shove down the claustrophobia.

Kevin was sleeping in a rickety folding chair, his mouth hanging open as his neck lolled awkwardly. She touched his shoulder and softly called his name. Despite the gentle touch, he jerked awake, nearly decking her in the spastic movement.

"WHASSAT? Hum. Oh, hey! Sorry – must've dozed off. Hey, you look way better! Shit. Not that you didn't before. You just looked- you know…shit. Sorry. Like everyone else that comes from the outside, I mean. Like you need a good shower and a good sleep. Shit. Sorry."

Lucy smiled. "Well, I've had both, now. A good sleep and a good shower." Sleep hadn't been that good, but it wasn't worth it to mention to Kevin. She patted his shoulder and used the recently abandoned chair to lace up her boots. "Thanks for waiting – I really needed that. REALLY needed it," she laughed. "Can we start the real tour now?"

Ten overwhelming minutes later, Lucy found herself unable to comprehend the sheer amount of people and stuff they'd just swept through.

"Aaaaaand this here's the main floor." Kevin made a wide gesture, as if showing off a grand display. "There's showers every few floors (but restrooms are every other floor), ladies on the uhhh..third and fifth and gents on the ground floor and eighth floor. Ninth floor is generally off limits for the usual riff-raff, 'cept for you, I suppose. Mainly Negan's quarters and his wives. And your balcony." So, he really does have multiple wives, Lucy thought. It wasn't really any of her business, she just met the guy, but it left an odd taste in her mouth. Bitter. She shook the thought away, it was ridiculous to be petty and jealous.

Kevin shot an odd look at her current scowl, vaguely wondering if his tour was not as exciting as he'd hoped, but nonetheless continued. "Alrighty. Here's the canteen- cafeteria, whatever. Everyone calls it somethin' different." Lucy and Kevin walked through a door and arrived at a large cafeteria, metal tables and plastic chairs lined up neatly. By now, it was fairly empty and being cleaned by tired-faced workers, wiping countertops and pushing mops.

He led her through quickly, rattling off information like a well-seasoned museum docent. "Breakfast is served at eight, so we just missed service, but they usually leave out some leftovers for stragglers. Might be cold, but it's food, I guess. Negan don't like waste. There's almost always hot coffee, though, I don't think we'd get much done if we didn't have it. We got more tea than we know what to do with, if that's your thing." A pretty young woman emerged from the kitchen to clear a few remaining plates, and Kevin nearly tripped over a chair as he watched her. "Hey Becca," he choked out and waved at the woman, but she didn't hear him and turned back to the kitchen with full arms. Kevin turned back and noticed Lucy's raised eyebrow. He coughed and continued as if the brief interruption hadn't happened.

"Lunch is your own business, either purchase goods or save some leftovers. We get jerky sometimes from one of the settlements, it keeps for a bit. Dinner is served at seven…gives the gents- and ladies I suppose too, enough time to clean up before draggin' their sorry asses back here. The kitchen gals complained about all the muddy boots and dust they was bringin' in." Kevin quickly glanced down at his own boots and realized the dried dirt trail he had made. "Whoops. Shit. Let's get outta here before I get hollered at. Red Meg can throw pans with pretty good aim."

"Red Meg?"

"Yeah, we got a few Megs here. Red Meg, uh, has red hair, and her face is red half the time from how fuckin' hot the kitchen gets. Hot temper too, and she could knock out most any of the guys here. Don't call her that to her face, she hates it."

Kevin led them to a small hallway off the kitchen. "Rec room is through there, it ain't used too much, though. Board games, cards, puzzles and stuff are mainly in there. Most people are too tired by the end of the day, most of the times it's used by Joanie, she's our teacher and kid-watcher, I guess. She and the kids use it for crafts n' shit. Sometimes ladies use it for card games, the guys usually have their poker games upstairs." His eyes brightened. "Sometimes we get a movie night in there, but usually it's for the kids, something appropriate for them or some shit. Negan don't like the adults to be idle too much. Says it causes trouble."

Children? Alive? "How many children are here?" Lucy asked. Her heart was pounding, her hands a little damp from anxious sweat.

Kevin scratched his scraggly beard in thought. "Mmmm. Mebbe a dozen or so? Probably a little less. There's a little classroom down the hall there that Joanie uses for the kids. They got little desks and cubbies and shit. We're always s'pposed to be on the lookout for classroom shit, whatever that means. 'Children are the future' or whatever. Alright, let's head out to the market. We're nearly done."

Lucy looked back and noticed a door covered in paper leaves, little names scrawled on them. A flood of memories threatened to spill over. She closed her eyes and shoved it down, the memories and fear.

Kevin shoved open the double doors in the hallway, and Lucy was suddenly overwhelmed by a clamor of noise and activity. The market was in a vast warehouse, the ceiling several stories above, with doors open to the outside. People seemed to filter in and out, and it was bustling with activity. A few pigeons fluttered around in the rafters, strutting along beams as if mimicking (honoring?) the swaggering walk of the Sanctuary leader. Kiosks full of goods and wares littered the area, and dozens of people darted around making their quick errands before starting their day. Lucy felt suspicious eyes on her, scrutinizing and judging, but they quickly lost interest. It's just Kevin, they seemed to say. Kevin and some woman.

A man with smudged glasses was tucked away in the corner, ledgers stacked up as he hastily scribbled in each one. Kevin jerked a thumb towards the little man. "The Accountant. I don't know if anyone remembers what his name is, really. Negan does, probably. He keeps track of everyone's points and keeps all the ledgers up to date so's that the sellers know how much everyone's got."

"Points?" Lucy asked.

Kevin led her through, walking backwards and avoiding obstacles with a surprising grace. Lucy thought he was born to give tours, it was the only time he seemed to not stumble over himself, except when he saw the pretty kitchen girl. "We don't have currency here, no sir. Worthless, anyhow. Instead we got points. You earn points to your name and you use points to buy shit. Cafeteria food don't cost points, Negan ain't stupid. Gotta keep people fed or they'll revolt. But everything extra'll cost ya. Most people that ain't…hostages…get a free set of clothes, depending on supplies maybe a toothbrush or other shit like that when they get here, but that's about it. Better or riskier jobs earn you more points. Running a shop earns points too, but not much. They mainly get access to discounted shit."

He coughed up some phlegm and spat it on the concrete floor nearby. A nearby shopkeeper, a woman with graying hair and a sour face, glared at him but said nothing. "The shopkeepers here keep track o' points in their ledgers, then at the end of the day it all gets tallied up by 'The Accountant' you saw over there." Kevin made air-quotes and rolled his eyes, unimpressed. "Some nerdy fella that did numbers and shit before. He drives Negan crazy. But Negan used to be the one to do it every night 'cause he didn't trust no one else to do it, so he's grateful for the help, I guess. What's he say? 'Necessary evils' or some shit. The Accountant ain't the most exciting to talk to, especially when he meets with Negan about the current state of affairs. Had to sit in on one of those meetings and I was bored to tears."

Lucy thought of Negan in glasses with tons of papers flying around, a calculator with tape overflowing to the ground as he tallied. It was easier to picture him lighting the papers on fire and laughing, like they did together watching the walkers pick their way through the maze. What did he do before all this? She wondered.

Two children chasing each other and shrieking darted past, nearly slamming into Lucy but instinct kicked in and she artfully dodged them. "Sorry!" one hollered over their shoulder as they ran inside.

"Do people get to pick their job or are they assigned?" she asked, sidestepping an older woman chasing after the shrieking kids.

"Bit o' both really. Just depends. If they was people that tried to fuck with us, they get put in the shit jobs. If you step outta line, you might get put in a shit job…if you're lucky. Just like anywhere I s'ppose, if you got useful skills then you are good as gold. People get put where we need ya. Well, sometimes. Sometimes it's where Negan wants ya."

She nodded. The system seemed harsh, totalitarian, but there was a logic to it. Negan didn't seem the type to be giving away things for free out of the kindness of his heart, so it didn't seem out of character to make his people work for it. There were so many people here, it was probably tough to supply. The adults had tired faces, empty eyes, but the few children she saw had bright, lively faces. We weren't meant to live in a world like this, she thought sadly.

Suddenly a thought jumped into her head and she turned to Kevin. "What's my job?"

He chuckled. "Don't rightly know, missy. I just got told you show you around, then introduce you to Dr. Smartypants. Are you stayin' here? Shit, I wasn't too sure of that."

Lucy shrugged, honestly not sure either. She noticed Kevin had been much more relaxed once they started the tour, he seemed comfortable and wasn't stumbling over each word like a newborn fawn discovering its legs.

"Well, if you do, just know what you're gettin' into, I suppose. Life here ain't easy, but we're safe n' shit for the most part. Negan likes useful people. He likes you. Shit- don't say that I said that. I can just tell, he's softer with you. Just follow the rules and everything'll be roses."

They reached another set of doors that led to an asphalt yard outside. A group of Saviors fiddled on a car and shit-talked one another, a few others were hauling lumber or scrap metal around. Some patrols were scattered around, looking at the surrounding landscape with binoculars. It was…oddly normal, for this world at least.

A large workshop stood on one end of the yard, near the front gate. A dark-haired man with a mullet stood outside, picking through some building materials that were piled outside and making marks on a notepad. He glanced up and noticed the pair approaching and watched placidly, his expression never changing.

After Kevin made introductions (and explained it was at Negan's request), Lucy quickly realized this was the Dr. Smartypants that the Saviors referred to.

"Well, I suppose there is no time like the present," Eugene said monotonously, shaking hands with Lucy. "Shall I provide you a tour of the facilities that I have been assigned to occupy myself in?"

Lucy nodded, trying hard not to giggle at Eugene's manner of speech. The workshop had a garage access for vehicles, a few of which were parked to the side in various states of disarray. Benches were full of boxes of various hardware and equipment, labeled with precise, neat lettering. Although it was full, it was meticulously organized in some sort of system that only the organizer could make sense of.

"What are you currently working on?" Lucy asked, as they finished the tour near a bench with stacks of blueprints.

Eugene spoke as he sifted through boxes. "Well, I have been primarily assigned to bring a former bullet factory to a functional status. However, I currently lack the required materials to make said bullets- materials which are being acquired as we speak by Savior supply runs. In the meantime, in order to make myself useful and contribute to the Sanctuary, I have been analyzing how to best reinforce sections of the west fence. The fencing there has been more worn down and battered by walkers then other areas, on account of more populous areas are located west of here, driving them first to that fence."

The pair of visitors were silent, digesting the torrent of words that Eugene unleashed. Kevin finally chuckled. "Jesus fuckin' Christ, Doc. Hasn't anyone ever told you to use less fuckin' words to say the same shit?"

Eugene sighed and shifted some papers around, as if he was too busy to answer such questions. "I have been accused by many by the length of my speech, but I find it near impossible to bring it down to an acceptable level. Therefore, I maintain my current status and hope for the best, I suppose."

He turned to Lucy. "I am not usually sent new recruits, so you must be the creator of the walker maze. There was talk here this morning about it that I was privy to. I am Sanctuary's Chief Engineer, a position which I now know takes an impressive amount of time and effort under immense pressure and scrutiny. I assume Negan has sent you to be of use to my projects."

"She went to school for engineering or some shit," Kevin said, shrugging. He suddenly felt uncomfortable, entirely out of his league. He gentle kicked a nearby box and pretended to scrutinize the contents.

Eugene offered him much needed relief. "Thank you for your service in bringing the new recruit here. You are dismissed and may return to your duties. Should Negan require either of our services, please inform him of our location."

Kevin stared for a moment, then turned to Lucy and shrugged. "Alright. I'll tell Negan where you guys are, if he asks. Good luck, I guess."

Lucy smiled, and shook his hand. "Thanks for the tour, it was…enlightening. You should really consider it full-time!" Kevin laughed and clamored out of the workshop.

Eugene turned back to Lucy, a glimmer in his eyes. "You have useful skills, no doubt about it. You will be a valuable contributing member to my little one-man operation I have here. Maybe I can even get you the title Assistant to the Chief Engineer."

Lucy smiled at her new co-worker (or boss…she wasn't clear yet on the dynamics here). "Not Assistant Chief Engineer?" Eugene's face flickered a hint of annoyance, missing her reference to an old TV show. "Oh- don't worry, It was a joke… I don't need a title. I don't care for one, even."

She glanced around the workshop at all the materials, possibilities flooding her head. Yes, she could be useful here.

"Alright, Eugene…shall we get started?"

/ / / / /

**Updated to fix formatting issues**

AN: A Lucy-heavy chapter, but a little break from the constant excitement. What are your thoughts on Kevin? He started off as just a brief mention in Chapter 1 as a contrast to Negan and wasn't going to make another appearance really, but as the story progressed I found that he is so much fun to write, and a good foil to play other characters off of. Happy New Year to all, let's make it a great one!

Take care lovelies xoxox.