I wish I own this anime...But no such luck...This is chapter 10...Excuse me for my lousy grammar and hope you enjoy this story...

Tears of angels that falls for me.

My eye ran along the lines of words on a foreign newspaper that old panda made me read. It was something about wars again only this time, it's in Japan. Yuu's home.

After finishing, I put the papers down on my room's desk and looked out the window beside me. The sky was painted with red and purple and faint black. The sun was about to set.

Standing up from my chair, I groaned for sitting so long and stretched a bit.

Slowly, I let myself out of my room into the cold corridor. Everyone was probably in the cafeteria by now so nobody's around.

My boots made deep faint sound against the stone floor as I leisurely climbed the stairs up to rooftop. It was like a routine I do everyday.

When the day was about to come to an end, I would put down everything I do and go to the rooftop and watch the sun set. At the same time, keep an eye on the grounds for Yuu. Just in case he comes back.

Pushing the huge wooden door open, a light gust of wind welcomed me. I walked over to the edge where Mr. Will was standing majestically and looked out at the beautiful scenery before me.

The wind blew again; I felt my messy flaming red hair waved on my head. The mountains in front of me looked huge and the sun slowly sinks lower and lower.

Ravens flew towards the dying sun, like always, they shriek as they go filling my ears with their cries of despair.

It had been eight months since Yuu left. Everyday, every hour and every minute, my mind was constantly thinking about him. Deep down me I can feel that he's alive, but I don't know where he is.

I sighed and sat down with my legs dangling off the cliff dangerously. I thought about Yuu. His lovely long black locks that spread so messily on his pillow like spilled ink. His pale and soft milky skin that I love to touch. Those straight pink lips that sometimes stretch into a beautiful smile only for me.

Oh, I almost forgot. His lovely deep sapphire blue eyes and long dark lashes that looked almost like black under the pale moonlight. A funny emotion swelled in me, those are the only eyes that can see through the fake me and those are the eyes that I fell in love with.

I sighed tearing my gaze from the mountains to look up at the sky. Opposite the sun, the moon was already hanging there in the darkness. It looked so lonely without any stars or clouds around it.

I smiled.

"One going down, the other coming up. Like two lovers that can never meet. Yet faithfully, both of them showed up everyday to see each other." I paused.

"Even for just a little while." I whispered as the sun vanished into the thin line in horizon and moon moved higher up in the sky.

Absent-mindedly, I reached out my hand to touch my lips. How I missed the warmth of Yuu's lips on mine. Every time we kiss, my heart never fails to skip a beat. But all seems so far away now. Yuu is so out of reach.

"Is this why you ask my heart not to waver?" I asked nobody.

"Why am I still here foolishly waiting for you?" I asked again. A lump formed in my throat as tears fought their way to my eyes.

I swallowed and wipe off the tear under my eye-patch. I'm not going to cry. I believe Yuu. He told me he'll be back and he will definitely come back. My love for him is strong.

But how long will it last? A voice asked in me.

I shook my head. I don't know. Then again, what is it that I truly know? I can't predict future can I?

"Lavi," a familiar voice interrupted my thoughts abruptly. I looked around for the source of voice but found nobody.

"Huh?" I scratched my head in confusion.

"I swear I heard her voice." I mumbled to myself.

The voice chuckled.

"Lavi, I'm in front of you." I turned my head to the front to see Leenale floating in mid-air.

I relaxed and smiled.

"Hey Leenale. What are you doing floating around?" I asked laughing at her activated innocence.

The pretty girl with long pigtails smiled at me.

"I'm just taking a walk."

"More like taking a fly." I mumbled.

She laughed and sank down beside me, humming a little tone to herself.

"What are you doing here everyday Lavi?" she asked after a few minutes of silence.

I debated with myself on how to answer her.

"Why aren't you in cafeteria with Moyashi?" I decided to ignore her question.

I turned sideways to look at her. She got this faraway look in her eyes as she watched the mountains.

"Allen went to a mission." She answered simply.

"Oh," I gave her the most intelligent answer in the whole universe.

"He'll be back." I said firmly.

She smiled not looking at me.

"I know. He promised me."

I turned away from her face and gazed at the darkening mountains in silence.

"How long had it been?" she asked turning her head slightly to look at me.

Please don't ask me about Yuu again.

"How long what had been?" I played stupid.

"You know what I'm talking about Lavi."

I chuckled and stayed silence for a long time.

"Nine months." I whispered.

She nodded.

The day has darkened completely. The air turned chilly but we sat there unmoving. Our hair swayed with the cold night wind as lights started to flicker open beneath us all around Black Order.

We continued to sit in silence.

A drop of water landed on my hand that was placed on my lap as the gust of strong wind blew. I looked up to see a clear sky. I frowned when another drop of water landed on my hand as another gust of wind blew.

I heard a small sob beside me.

She's crying.

I sighed inwardly and turned towards her. Slowly I leaned down to peer at her face. Tears rolled down her soft cheeks and when the wind blew, drops of her tears landed on me.

"Don't cry. Allen will be back." I said trying to assure her. She shook her head.

"What?" I asked. "It's not about him?"'

Again she shook her head.

"Now," I said thoughtfully. "What could make our little princess cry other then Allen?" she kept quiet.

"Did someone bully you? Well, tell me who that is. I'll give him a piece of my mind." I said again wondering why she was crying.

She tried to smile as she shook her head, her hair waving around her face.

"These tears," she explained. "They fell by themselves."

I laughed.

"You're silly Leenale." I said and ruffled her long hair playfully but she kept on crying.

"Don't cry." I plead and put an arm around her shoulders. She leaned into me and put her face at my shoulder and cried. I felt my black shirt slowly damp with warm tears.

I couldn't do anything but lend her a shoulder.

"Lavi, I feel so bad for you." she finally said, her voice quivering.

Huh?

"What do you mean?" I asked softly and she pulled away to look me straight in the eye.

"Deep down here," she pressed my left chest. "It felt hurt. I know."

Behind my smiling façade, I heard my heart cracked.

"Why would you say that?"

"Everyday, I pray for Kanda to return. Everyday, I pray for you." She paused.

"How come you're so strong?" She finished her sentence in a very soft whisper that I almost couldn't catch.

"Don't worry. I'm sure Yuu will be back. He promised me and I believe him." I said softly trying to assure her.

"I want him to return so badly because I know, you're hurting even though you never show it. You never will." She said fresh tears rolled down her cheeks again.

I stared at her feeling sad but did not show it. I can't show it.

"Come on Leenale, don't be sad over me. I'm doing just fine aren't I? And Yuu, I'm sure he'll come back. It's all the matter of time."

She only nodded.

"Come on, it's getting cold, I'll walk you back to your room." I said softly pulling her up beside me.

She nodded again and that night, I walked her back to her room. I smiled and laughed with her telling her I'm fine. When we arrived at her room, she was smiling happily again. I wished I could smile like that too.

I walked down a corridor after Leenale was safely in her room which was very near Science Department because of Komui. My footsteps quieted down as I walked pass Komui's office.

I was seriously not in the mood for his craps right now.

Then I heard a muffled voice coming from in there. I strained my ears and heard a small sniffle. I frowned in curiosity and stood beside the huge door my back leaning against the wall so he can't see me.

"I'm sorry." I heard him whispered. Curiosity got the better of me so I peek into the room and saw Komui sitting on his huge chair, face hidden behind his hands which were propped up on his laps.

"I'm so sorry." He whispered over and over again.

I realized he was crying.

I pulled my head back and sighed inwardly. The pain and sadness humans feel. It's incredible.

I stood there listening to his silent sobs and sniffs until I heard him mumbled something.

"I'm so sorry Lavi." I blanched when I heard my name.

"I'm so sorry Lavi." He whispered over and over again.

I stood there starring at my feet feeling miserable listening to the Chinese man's sobs. My heart tightens in my chest making me feel a little out of breath. It hurts. Yeah, it hurts a lot.

"I'm so sorry I couldn't make it better." His voice broke harshly.

I shook my head, sadden by the fact that the Chinese man was crying for me.

"Don't be. It's not your fault." I whispered so softly, I was sure he couldn't hear me.

"It's not your fault at all." I whispered again and walked away leaving him there crying alone.

I'm not worth your tears.

"Give me half a dozen cups of mango pudding please." I said smiling cheerfully at Jerry. I needed something sweet to cheer me up after listening to Komui cry.

The older man hmn-ed at me thoughtfully.

"It's a bit light don't you think. I believe I did not see you during dinner. You should eat more so you'll have more strength to fight." He said flashing his white teeth at me.

I chuckled and scratched my head.

"I don't really have an appetite today. Something sweet will do." I told him, my smiling façade deceived him.

He looked at me for a little longer then nodded before turning away to make my pudding.

"Here you go." He said putting a tray on the counter after a couple of minutes.

I nodded.

"Thanks a lot Jerry." I said sincerely looking into his eyes.

He studied me for a long time as I stood there continuing to smile.

"How are you Lavi?" he asked looking suddenly very old.

I snorted and raised an eye brow at him before laughing.

"Well," I shrugged. "Like always, never better." I grinned assuring at him.

"I've been here for more then thirty years. I watched you kids grow up." He said grimly.

I listened and nodded.

"Kanda," he paused.

Yuu.

"He never had many friends."

I rolled my eye.

"That's because he's such a pain in the ass all the time." I said sarcastically.

He shook his head and leaned on the counter to look at me closer.

"The truth is, I've never seen him so alive before." He nodded to himself remembering his memories.

"He was like a living dead until you came into his life." He said grimly.

I averted my gaze from his and look down at my tray of puddings to hide my pain.

"He's a beautiful kid." Jerry said tiredly.

You have no idea. I thought as I nodded.

"I know both of you meant a lot to each other." He smiled at me when I looked up stunned.

"How do you know?"

"On your part, it was easy to see. For him, he was always complaining about you totally pissed off. If he didn't care, why do you think he's so angry? Isn't he always there when you're hurt though he'd never-"he choked on his words.

I looked up and he quickly turned away from me. Too late. I already saw the tears that fell from his eyes.

He frantically tries to wipe away his tears with his back towards me but I saw more tears fell instead.

"Please don't cry for me." I whispered wishing something can mitigate the pain I feel in my chest.

He paused for a moment before taking a deep breath to calm himself down.

"I'm not worth your tears." I mumbled picking up my tray and started heading towards my room.

I'm not worth it for any of my friends to cry for me.

"Lavi," he called after me, his voice broke. "I know that you've been always sad, sometimes, your mask give your feelings away too."

I stopped listening to him.

"I try to make things better by cooking better food for you but the truth is I can't do anything. Watching you kids suffering like this hurts me a lot. I'm so sorry I couldn't do anything." His voice was quivering, trying hard not to cry.

I pursed my lips and fought with my own tears that threaten to well behind my eyes. I looked down at the tray in my hands.

I'm not suffering, my heart is. Yuu meant so much to me; words can't be used to explain just how much exactly. There is nothing about him that I don't love. He's not exactly perfect but it was his imperfection that made him so perfect to me.

I turned around pushing the thoughts away to the back of my mind and smiled.

"Don't worry Jerry, Yuu will be back. I'll be fine. We're strong aren't we? We eat your food since young." I grinned holding up my arm to show him my muscle and Jerry that stared at me wide-eyed.

He smiled through his tears and nodded.

"Yeah, you kids are really strong." He agreed. "If that's the case," he cheered up immediately. "Come here tomorrow during lunch and I'll make you the best food ever!"

I laughed at his sudden change of mood.

"I'll be here." I promised and walked away, my smile fell instantly.

I never knew loneliness 'till I met you.

That night I had nightmares again. I woke up drenched with cold sweat. Pushing my blanket away, I stood up to walk towards the door but stopped when a cold hard truth suddenly hit me; I have no one to run to anymore. I bit my lip as I walked back and sank back down on my bed, emotions inside me wanted to erupt like a volcano.

"Calm down Lavi." I told myself sitting properly in my huge bed breathing hard.

I looked around and saw nothing but darkness. There was no moon that night. There was only me.

I pressed a hand on my face tiredly.

I gazed at the space beside me. It was empty. It used to be filled with a fallen angel with long black locks and lovely midnight blue eyes but he's gone now. Where? I don't know.

I reached out my hand to pat the cold space beside me. I gritted my teeth when emotions swelled making tears well. I shut both my eyes tightly frowning. This unbearable clench in my heart, what is this? I'm not suppose to feel like this. Weren't I trained to not to feel?

"Yuu," I whispered, my voice sounded foreign to my own ears. I wanted to burst from suppressing so many emotions in me. I wanted so much to cry my eyes out but I can't. I can't do it.

Wiping my cold sweat on my forehead with the back of my palm, I remembered how Yuu always caress me with his cold long smooth fingers. I sighed leaning my back on my pillow, pulling the sheets over me.

My heart craving for the warmth of Yuu beside me. I wanted to see him so much that it actually hurts. I want my love to come back to me so much. I gripped my hands in frustration.

Wasn't I used to this before I met Yuu? Didn't I always sleep alone and handle silly tiny things like nightmares alone? But why? Why does this heart of mine clenching and hurting and my chest felt empty?

So many of my friends cried for me today. They said I was strong, but the truth beneath this stupid façade of mine was actually pain. A pain I can't afford others to see. A pain that only Yuu can mitigate it. A pain that was so unbearable, I could slam my head against the wall.

I wrapped my arms around my knees and hid my face grinding my teeth trying hard to hold those stupid annoying tears behind. My pain deteriorated with every passing minute. Only then I realized, this emptiness in me, this pain, it can be described by one simple word that normal people always use. Yes, it's a very simple word that I've came across for at least a million times in books. It's called loneliness. Yes, without Yuu, I feel very lonely. So lonely, I could almost break from inside out and vanish.

That night, I almost lost my equilibrium. As I was falling asleep, a tear slipped down from my eye and slid down over the bridge of my nose and down to my pillow.

That's okay, I remembered I told myself. No one saw that tiny tear. That's okay, Yuu will be back soon because God damn it, he promised me. The beautiful yet arrogant and aggressive man that I've came to love so much will come back to me because I knew he felt the same way too about me. I trust him.

This chapter was somehow kinda hard to write...Hope you liked it...Leave a simple comment if you want...So "somebody" *winkwink* yes, you...Please be patient, I predict Kanda will show up in another chapter or two......Bear with me and Keep reading! Next chapter right up!