Chapter 9 The Unpleasantness to Come.

Morning came; I felt more tired than when I went to bed. Out of habit I stopped to check on our sick patient. Much to my surprise she had her eyes open. For the first time, they looked clear and calm.

I greeted her with a warm smile. "Hello! Remember me?"

A puzzled expression crossed her face, "I think so?" There was a long pause, "I- I remember being on horseback. I saw your face. And another's. Where am I?"

"You're at my ranch. I'm Slim Sherman. Do you remember now?"

"Yesss. A sheriff?"

"No, that was the other man you saw, Sheriff Cory."

"I saw a- a woman and a child?"

I nodded, "that would be Daisy and Mike."

Just then Jess popped his head in. She jumped at his sudden appearance and shrank a little into the bed.

"Slim, I'll be in the…," Jess saw that our patient was awake. He lowered his eyes, "Oh. Sorry."

"This is Jess Harper, my partner on the ranch."

He nodded and smiled shyly toward her, "Sorry, Miss Virginia, din't mean t'startle ya. Very glad to see you awake."

I saw her relax. But she still seemed a bit confused. "Why can't I move?"

"You've been sick for almost three weeks now. You had us scared."

"Sick? I- I can't remember…"

Her eyes widened then pleaded, "Tory? Sissy? Where are they?"

I kneeled down close to her. "They didn't make it, Virginia. I'm so very sorry."

"Where are they?" She pleaded.

"You chose a spot on a hill about a day's ride from here. It was the perfect spot looking over a large valley with mountains in the distance. We buried them on the hilltop, together."

Her eyes got vacant. "I remember…"

She looked at me, "why didn't you let me die too? I could be with them."

I was too stunned to answer her. Daisy interrupted, "Because we thought you were worth saving, dear! Now you two skedaddle while she eats something."

Daisy had carried in a tray with a bowl of broth for Virginia.

I left the room but stood by the door that was open.

"No," I heard Virginia say. "Please. Not hungry."

"Come now, dear," cajoled Daisy, 'just a bite of breakfast will help you to get back on your feet in no time."

Try as she might Daisy couldn't get Virginia to eat or drink.

Doc Collyer stopped by around noon. Virginia was awake but very weak. Add to that her refusal to eat and drink caused the doctor to knit his brow with worry.

"If she doesn't eat or drink, she could have a setback," he told us, "While I'm here, let's see if we can get something substantial in her.

Daisy had fixed beef stew and bread. She drew a bowl of the beef broth to take to the sickroom.

I was working on the books when Daisy and Doc Collyer came out of the room. Doc Collyer carrying the now-cold bowl of broth and Daisy dabbing her eyes on her apron.

"Oh, Slim!" Daisy cried. "It's just awful!"

Doc Collyer emerged from the kitchen. I gave him a quizzical look as I hugged Daisy. He shook his head sadly.

"I was sort of expecting this. Given what you described about Victoria and Melissa and given her emaciated condition when she arrived. I was afraid this might happen."

"Afraid of what, Doc?" I was very concerned.

"They were starved, Slim, and most likely deprived of water too. And Virginia being the oldest gave all of her food and water, what little they were fed, to Victoria and Melissa, to keep them alive."

Yet another reason to despise these low-lifes!

"I suspect the brutes wanted them alive but too weak to run away."

Daisy finally found her voice. "What can we do, doctor? She's got to eat to get her strength back."

"We've got to find a way to make her believe that she and her sisters are getting the same amount of food. That there is no need for her sacrifice."

I was puzzled, "Doc, she knows the truth about her sisters. She picked the spot for us to bury them."

"Slim, this has nothing to do with whether or not she thinks they are alive or dead. However long they were with those barbarians, she got conditioned to the idea that to eat nothing was to save her sisters. She's still afraid that they might die unless she gives them all she has."

I still didn't understand. How could she think they were alive and dead at the same time?

Daisy cut in, "Doctor how about if I take three bowls in to her full and show her how much they are getting?"

"That might work, Daisy, but let's try taking two bowls that have just a touch of food at the bottom and tell her they got all they wanted and it was her turn to eat. She may think that they got to eat first. We also must let her know that they won't get any more food unless she eats hers."

The ruse worked. Daisy made up another hot bowl of broth and took two slightly empty bowls in with her. This time she said that Virginia ate less than half the bowl. Even though she didn't finish the broth, the doctor said it was a good sign. He instructed Daisy to feed her broth for several more days and only small portions.

When the doctor and Daisy stepped out of the sickroom, he spoke, "We may need to repeat this ruse several times until she gets the idea that she doesn't have to deprive herself anymore. We'll do the same with fluids too. Juice, milk or water for her, no coffee. Water is preferable and she can have as much as she wants."

There was a long pause as if the doctor was considering something, then he said, "I need to talk to you three."

"In that case, won't you join us for lunch, doctor?" Daisy invited.

"Thank you, Miss Daisy, don't mind if I do. Looks delicious."

I stepped outside and called 'Lunch!' Of course Jess didn't have to be told twice.

Daisy quickly had the table set and, as usual, her beef stew was wonderful. It was finished off with a slice of cheese and apple pie.

"That was great, Miss Daisy." Doctor Collyer said after a second helping of pie.

Daisy got up to clear away the lunch dishes. Doc grabbed her by the arm, "Sit down a moment, Miss Daisy. I need to talk to all three of you and I want your full attention."

That sounded ominous to me.

Doc put his elbows on the table and steepled his fingers. "First of all, tell Mike he is doing a wonderful job and to keep it up. I'll give him his next assignment when I'm back out this way. Just tell him to keep talking to her but don't tire her out. I'm hoping this way we can avoid some of the unpleasantness that's probably to come."

More worrying words.

"Second, job well done! Thanks to your wonderful care, this girl has a chance at a new life. I had faith in you three. She couldn't have been in better hands. I wish all my patients had such care!"

I was surprised at the praise. "We did what anyone would have done, Doc."

"Not quite everyone, Slim; but the easy part's over. Now comes the more difficult part: keeping her alive."

What did he say? Keeping her alive? He must mean the Hardings.

"Don't worry, Doc, we're on the watch for Isom Harding. If he comes arou…"

"Slim, I wasn't talking about Harding. I'm talking about saving her from herself."

From herself? What on earth could he possibly mean by that?

I looked at Jess and Daisy. It seemed I was the only clueless person in the room. Daisy looked like she might tear up any moment. And Jess? Jess didn't make eye contact with anyone, he looked down at his bowl and stirred absently with his spoon.

"I'm not sure what you mean, Doc."

He continued, "It's good that all three of you served during the war. You may have some perspective on what I'm about to say. It is different with every person who survives tragedies, but some things are common."

What the heck was he talking about?

"Miss Daisy, you were a nurse during the war. I'm sure you saw a lot of soldiers who went home with more scars than just those on the body."

Daisy nodded as she recalled some of those faces. Tears were verging. "Yes," she said quietly.

"Slim, Jess, when you came home from the war, it took you a while to settle in, to feel normal again, didn't it? Sometimes you would have nightmares or forget where you were when you woke up. The smell of gunpowder could take you back to the battlefield as if you were reliving it. For a long time, you avoided crowds, you kept your back to the wall, woke up at the slightest noise." He paused to take a breath, "and sometimes," his voice lowered, "sometimes, you felt as if you were losing your mind."

I was stunned! How had he known that about me?

"Doc, you served too?" I asked.

"Yes, as a medical officer for the Union. When I went back home, I stopped practicing for a while. I'd react at the slightest noise. Just the smell of gunpowder or blood or dirty socks would make me sick to my stomach. Many times I'd wake up and not know where I was. For months I avoided people, crowds, loud noises like celebrations. I still don't much like them-loud noises I mean.

"Then I found out that I wasn't alone in how I felt. When I started practicing again, I found that many of my colleagues who served had the same reactions. We're only just beginning to understand how the mind works. What we are discovering is that traumatic events can often cause people to feel the way I just described. Many drink or use opiates to dull the pain they feel. Some commit suicide. Many wind up in the insane asylum. I don't want any of this to happen to that girl in there.

"Neither do we," chimed Daisy. "How can we help?"

"First I must make you understand; I can't predict how she will process what has happened to her. She could become totally uncommunicative. She could try to end her life. She could still wind up in an insane asylum. There are no guarantees that she will come out of this whole."

End her life? I was astonished. She was only eighteen or nineteen years old! Why would someone so young choose to end her life?

"Miss Daisy. Jess. Slim. You have been so generous to keep her until she's physically well. I don't want to put any additional burdens on your generosity. You have a ranch and a relay station to run. Not that this will take much of your time but it does require some. It requires being observant and vigilant. Once she is well enough to travel, I can make arrangements for her to be moved if…"

Daisy interrupted sternly: "Hold it right there! That girl needs stability in her life right now! Bouncing around from place to place wouldn't help her, would it?"

Doc sighed, "I admit, it would be best if she were in a stable place…"

"Then it's settled! She's staying right here!"

I was a bit more apprehensive than Daisy, "are you sure, Daisy?"

"As long as it takes Slim!"

"Jess?" I looked to my partner on how he felt.

Jess added, "I wouldn't mind." He glanced at me with a thin smile.

I gave in. I wasn't really going to turn her away but I wanted all of us to be on board.

"Well I certainly thank you and I think in the long run, Virginia will thank you too. You three and Mike are certainly the best candidates to guide her through working things out. But the journey must be hers alone. You can show her the doors but she'll have to walk through them."

"Next time I'm here, we'll see how she improves physically and then start working on getting her healthy all the way. In the meantime, watch for certain signs like sleeping too much, not eating, really bad nightmares, or if she gets angry easily."

Daisy promised we'd watch. Doctor Collyer left us written instructions on improving her physical health and gave us some signs to watch for.

Once Virginia started to eat and drink on a regular basis, she gained strength steadily. Soon she was able to feed herself. It wasn't long before she was able sit up in bed; and then at the edge of the bed. Then she was able to stand (although initially it was exhausting). A few days later, she was able to move from the bed to the chair in her bedroom. Jess and I didn't have to watch over her at night any longer.

Mike kept her company nearly every day after school. Once she gained enough strength to sit up in bed, she helped him with his homework. At first, she could only answer in short bursts. It was as if her mind was trying to recall what to do. The doctor said the loss of blood was probably the reason for that. Once she gained strength, her thought processes would come back he assured us.

About a week later, she was able to walk with assistance into the living area. She was still unsteady and it exhausted her.

She always had a shy smile whenever Jess or I would talk to her or help her walk. She wouldn't hardly look at us. I still could see a lot of hurt behind her eyes. There was a dullness that wouldn't go away.

I was concerned recalling what Doctor Collyer had said. But she had not exhibited any of the signs he told us to be watching for.

While she was recuperating, she contented herself reading from mine and Andy's library. Once she felt better, she was getting stir crazy from looking at four walls. She shyly requested to sit outside and enjoy the sunshine. Daisy first thought it might be too cold but she wrapped Virginia up in a blanket and let her soak in the fresh clean air and sunshine in one of the chairs on the porch. She was able to continue to read the books outside. I believed it lifted her spirits somewhat.