"Behind Blue Eyes" by Kitty Rasputin

Chapter 10-Guilt

The trip across the Crack in the O.Z. was both exhilarating and terrifying. At any other point in time, she might have been whooping and hollering, but the nearby presence of the Longcoats made it so that had to restrain her enthusiasm. Once they were all safely on the other side, they quickly hurried away so that they could put as much distance in between them and Azkadellia's troops as possible. They walked for the rest of the night and in the early morning light, could clearly see their surroundings. That was when Cain had spotted the tree.

"That's where my family made their new home." In his enthusiasm, he quickly outdistanced the rest of them which was probably for the best when Toto insinuated that they were wasting time by searching for Cain's family.

"He's always made time for us," DG responded quickly. She was not about to pester Cain to keep moving when he was so close to finding what he had thought he had lost so long ago. She knew exactly what it was like to search for her family and she was going to give Cain every opportunity she could to reconnect with his own. If that meant that he would leave their group, then she would let him go.

They finally caught up with him in front of an open tin suit, this one thankfully empty of an inhabitant. It was a good omen that there was nobody left in it, but DG saw the look of total devastation as he turned away. She watched him fall to his knees in front of a grave marker and her heart crumbled a little bit at the sight of it.

The rain began falling and everyone huddled underneath an awning to remain dry while Cain did his mourning. Finally, she could not handle it any more. It was not right that he had nobody to stand by him as he wept for his family. She stepped out into the rain, not giving a damn about how wet it was making her, and placed a hand on his shoulder. There were no words that she could give him, nothing that she could say that would make his pain any less, so she opted to remain silent. As she watched the tears pouring out of his eyes when he kissed the grave marker a final goodbye, she could feel her own prickling behind her eyelids.

When they stopped to rest a little while later, DG attempted to distract the others. She knew that Cain still needed some time to himself and was more than willing to give him the space that he desired. She knew the moment that he had shoved his feelings to the side for the present because that was when he declared that they needed to keep going. She understood that it was going to take him time to deal with the loss of his wife, time that they did not have to waste. He was pushing them forward because finding the emerald was the more immediate concern.

She had to concentrate once more on her memories when they reached the fork in the road, but they were coming to her much easier now. It only took a few moments for her to choose the correct path and she was so confident that they were finally getting somewhere that she did not even notice the mobat until Toto shouted. It was only Cain's quick thinking that prevented Glitch from being attacked again.

"Why did it attack now?" DG could not help wondering why the creature had not attacked them at first sight. Even with her limited knowledge of the workings of the O.Z., that seemed suspicious. Cain's assurance that it was probably random made her feel a little better, but then Toto spoke up again.

The presence of the mobat sparked another memory inside of her and she rushed off to explore it. She ran through a tall hedge maze, wanting to laugh out loud at how familiar the place seemed. She had been in this place before, had seen it in the memories of her childhood. A bright smile stretched across her face until she reached the other side of the maze. Then, as she took in the ruined land surrounding her, she grew despondent. This was not the same place in her dreams. "This place used to be paradise."

She listened as Cain and Glitch told her about what had happened to Finaqua, but that did not help them much now. It was then that she heard the laughter. She could remember leading a young Azkadellia away into the woods in search of an adventure. She paused outside of a cave, nervous and scared about what she might find inside, but she pushed herself further. Every step that she took into the cave was filled with memory of her and Azkadellia following the same route.

The terror that she felt when her arm was sucked into the mouth of the stone face was fresh in her mind and she called out for Azkadellia's help. It was only after they came face to face with the witch that she was frozen in place. It was only through her sister's urging that she remained still. The horrible woman had startled her and she had released her sister's hand to run to safety. She looked back, though, to watch as the witch forced Az to her knees and took over her body.

DG found herself back in the present, crying. This explained so much about what had changed her older sister to monster that she had become. The truly horrific thing that she realized was that she was guilty of so much more than Azkadellia was. "I'm sorry, my sister. All the terrible things that happened, they were all my fault. I should never have let go."

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Author's Note-Hi there! I know it has been a long, LONG time since this got updated. For that, I truly apologize. It got lost among the shuffle of various stories in progress. I stumbled across it a few weeks ago and decided that it had been collecting dust for far too long. As I write this, the final two chapters are in progress. Hopefully, there are a few readers out there interested in seeing my take on the rest of the miniseries. If not, I can be satisfied that it is at least one more project completed. All of it should be posted by the beginning of July at the latest. I hope you enjoy!