Chapter 10

Peter

Emma sat next to me quietly I could feel her shiver every so often and it pained me that I could do nothing about it. I pulled her closer to me and did my best to try to warm her. Emma had her head lying down on my shoulder and was resting when she coughed. I thought she had gotten over that weeks ago. "I thought that went away."

"It didn't it have been coming and going probably just a cold." This wasn't good she was fighting to not get sick and now I had brought her out here and this happens. "Get some rest we will leave as soon as we can." And she did I couldn't say I didn't like her laying there on me. But I did it felt right that she was this close to me. There was still this nagging in my head that this was wrong. I stayed up while she slept watching her sleep. I could tell it was getting dark and the rain had yet to stop. I resigned to letting myself sleep I leaned back and closed my eyes.

I woke up hours later to Emma coughing again it sounded worse than I ever heard her. I placed my hand on her cheek she was burning up. Her hands were clammy face flushed. "Emma wake up." I gently shook her.

"Hmmm Peter what's going on." I pulled her to me and leaned back. "Your burning up do you feel ok."

"I'm tired and cold I don't feel so good." I pushed her hair out of her face and let her lay back down on my shoulder. I held her close hoping for morning. I woke an hours later seeing the light coming through the clouds. The rain had stopped and I thanked Aslan that it did.

I placed my hand on Emma's cheek she was still burning up. She was still asleep so I laid her down on the blankets and covered her. I pulled my shirt on and went outside to check to see if it was clear enough to head home. It was and I was thankful. I saddled both horses but I knew Emma was in no condition to ride alone. I packed all our supplies that we had on Emma's horse. And went back to wake Emma, "Emma we need to go." She lifted her head up and opened her eyes to look at me.

"I'm still so tired Peter." She barely opened her eyes to look up at me.

"I know I think you're sick," her voice was raspy and not more than a whisper, "I need to get you home. I'm going to put you on the horse just hold on and I will be up behind you soon."

"I'll walk over there." She tried to sit up I put my hands on her waist and shoulder to help her. "Emma let me pick you up." She didn't lesson she kept trying to stand once she was on her feet her knees gave out and she feel into my chest. I swung her up in my arms and placed her on the horse. I quickly put the extra blanket up and speed to Cair.

It didn't take us long to arrive at the castle Edmund, Lucy and Susan came running out to us, what happed peter, what's wrong with Emma, so many questions were thrown at me. I pulled Emma off the horse and cradled her to me she was only half awake her fever worse than before. I held her close worried about her this was all my fault I should have brought her home. I should have waited longer to take her out to ride when it wouldn't be cold at night. All I could do was pray to Aslan as a stable boy took the horses and I rushed Emma to her room. On our way there Emma woke up, "Peter what's going on."

"You're sick it will be fine I will take care of you." Ed opened her bed room door I rushed though it and straight to her bed. I placed my hand on her cheek, "we are going to get you in dry cloths and then a healer is going to check on you. I won't let anything happen to you." I took her hand before Susan came over to me and placed her hand on my shoulder, "let us get her in dry cloths Peter. You can sit with her then." I leaned over Emma and whispered in her ear, "as soon as we are in dry cloths I will be back." I felt a slight nod and a squeeze of my hand before I let go and went across the hall to my room I felt Edmund behind me.

"What happened while you were gone." Edmund stopped at the door closing it.

"I got caught in the storm," I threw my shirt off and pulled another one out, "the only thing that saved us was a cave. We couldn't see it was raining really hard. She got a fever in the middle of the night we both were soaked. It's all my fault I did this to her." I jerked my shirt on over my head and pulled out pants and a pair of shoes.

"You didn't do anything you don't know why she's sick now." I do know why because I took her riding.

"She asked to stay longer when I saw the storm clouds move over us. I should have made us leave. I should have known what was coming. I should have protected her kept her safe but I didn't and now she's sick and I don't know how to fix it. It's my fault all of it.' I sank down on my bed I felt horrible. Putting my head in my hands and my elbows on my knees I tried to calm down this wouldn't help Emma at all.

Ed sat down next to me and put his hand on my shoulder, "it's not your fault what happened. We all can see you care for you, you can't tell her no Pete I haven't seen you do it yet. You wanted to make her happy there's nothing wrong with that. She's sick and there's noting anyone could do about it. Don't beat yourself up over it, it won't help. You won't feel better and it won't make her better either."

I sat up and tried to compose myself, "I need to finish changing to go to Emma. I don't want her alone for too long."

"I will have some food brought up for you and something for Emma as well." Ed stood and walked out the door leaving to change and pull myself together. I pulled my clean pants on and dry shoes. I left to go to Emma who now was changed in a clean night gown and the healer was attending to her. It took everything I had to stand back and let him look her over. I had to cross my arms to keep myself from reaching out to her and pulling her to me. If felt like forever before he came to me, "my king she is very sick. I believe she has an infection of her lungs. She's having a hard time breathing, chest pain, high fever, cough, I can make her up a tea to drink to help. It will take time for her to recover. I recommend bed rest no exertion. I also wouldn't leave her alone someone should be with her at all times."

Oh Aslan why did this happen why her why not me. I will be with her. Day and night I wont leave her side for anything. I caused this and I would fix it. "How soon will you have her tea for her." I wanted Emma better and fast.

"I need to go to my office and mix the herbs I think I have all of them that I need." He picked up his bag and looked back at me.

"I will be here when you have it ready.' He nodded at me and walked out the door. I was finally in the room alone with Emma I took a set on the bed next to her. I took her hand and she opened her eyes to me. "You're going to be fine just some rest and you will get better."

"I know there's more than that Peter but I trust you to make it better." Emma squeezed my hand. The door opened to show Susan and Lucy walking in with a water basin and a tea tray.

Susan stopped at me and handed me the water basin, "for her fever it will help until we get her medicine into her." I sat it down on the table beside the bed and dipped the cloth in it and placed it on Emma's forehead.

"How does that feel.' I gently wiped her face with it. 'Cold." I smiled at her as I kept the cloth on her face. Lucy came up next to me, "her tea she needs to drink all of it six times a day more if possible. The healer gave it to us one our way up here." I removed the cloth from Emma's face and helped her sit up. I gave her the cup she almost dropped it so I covered her hands with mine and helped her drink it. Ed came in with some food for us on a tray. I took it from him and set it next to me on the bed. Susan and Lucy crawled up and sat next to Emma while Edmund sat on the foot of the bed. I gave Emma some bread that she slowly ate while she leaned against me. We told my siblings what happened while we were gone. Even though Ed had already heard this he sat quietly while I filled Lucy and Susan in. As I talked I handed Emma food that we both ate. She was so sick I had to hold her against me to keep her upright to eat. Pretty soon she fell asleep while we were talking. I laid her down on her pillows and covered her up while we left her bed to sit next to the small fire.

"I'm staying here until she's well." I started at the flames knowing there would be protest.

"You can't sleep in here your room is right across the hall she will be fine while she sleeps." Susan was of course trying to change my mind about it.

"I'm staying in here Susan and you can't stop me." I didn't want to see the look on her face so I just stared at my hands in my lap. I was in no mood to hear a lecture from Susan right now. But of course she had to go and try to tell me off, "it's not proper for you to stay here Peter." I kept my head down and tried to keep myself under control.

"I don't care what's proper it wasn't proper yesterday when we stayed in that cave together but yet we did. It won't be proper for me to stay here but I'm going to. She's sick and it's my fault so I will take care of her proper or not."

"Fine I will check on you too in the morning." And with that Susan walked out the door in a huffing mess. I felt bad for getting angry at her but then again I wanted to stay here and no one was going to make me leave.

"You should rest you just got back too." Lucy was looking up at me from her set by the fire.

"I know Lu and I will I just want to make sure she's ok." I took a glance at her laying there asleep she depended on me and I let her down.

"It's not your fault." Edmund voice brought me out of my staring.

"You don't know that Ed I could be all my fault. And it was my will to give her everything she wanted that made this happen." I didn't take my eyes off of her until Edmund spoke again.

You said so yourself that she seemed like she was getting sick when we brought her here. The rain and cold was probably just the last straw." He came over to me placing his hand on my shoulder; "she will be fine your both here and we can take care of her." He left walking out the door leaving Lucy and I alone.

Lucy stood and sat down next to me on the small couch, "it's not your fault you didn't do anything but get her here safely. I know you care for her but you can't be there for her if your mad at yourself."

"I know Lu but some day you will understand." Lucy was too young to understand any of this. And deep down inside I hope she never has too. "Well I will leave you to take care of her. I'm glad you're both back we were all so worried. Edmund was about to go look for you if you weren't back by lunch. Let us know if you need anything." Lucy hugged me I wrapped my around her, "I will be fine Lu I'm just worried about Emma right now." She pulled away from my hug, "I know". Lucy walked out the door quietly shutting the door behind her. I walked over to Emma's bed she was laying there sleeping her head on her pillow and her hair around her. Her face was slightly pale and I couldn't help but run a finger down her cheek, she was still burning up. Taking the cloth out of the water I wrung it out and wiped at Emma's face hoping make her feel better.

I kept a vigil over her for days it was always the same bathe her face with the cool cloth, wake her every few hours for her to drink her tea and eat, watching her sleep, hoping the fever would break. I stayed in the chair by her bed holding her hand asking Aslan why, why her, why this, why did he let her be this sick. Everyone was asking me to come to meals sleep in my room and in a bed. To get up out of the chair and do something but I couldn't. I didn't want to leave Emma alone. If she were to wake while I was gone I wouldn't forgive myself.

This went on for almost a week before her fever broke. I was sleeping leaning against the bed using it as my pillow. I held her hand as I slept wanting to know if she woke. I woke up every few hours to change the cloth on her forehead pulling the warm damp cloth off her face to put a cool one on. But when I placed the cloth on her cheeks she woke up. She blinked her eyes at me and a small smile curved her lips. Her lips were cracked and dry but her eyes told me she was feeling better. "hi"

"Hi." I smiled and I knew I looked like an idiot but she was wake and truly awake.

"How do you feel?" I ran my fingers down her cheek her fever had broken while we both slept.

"Bad but better compared to the last time I remember being awake. Is there some water?" I picked the glass up and handed it to her she wrapped both hands around it and almost dropped it. She was still so weak.

"Here let me hold it with you." I wrapped one of my hands around the glass in her lap and helped her raise it to her lips. "Take small sips I couldn't get you to drink as much as you should have the past few days." Emma took a few small sips and let the glass rest in her lap. Before I could stop myself I slipped into the bed next to Emma putting my arm around her shoulders helping her sit up better to drink.

"How long have I been in bed?" Emma rested her head against my shoulder as she asked. I didn't want to scare her but she needed to know the truth.

"Five days. We got back before noon you have been in bed since then. You don't remember anything." I ran my fingers though her hair one of the things I had been doing off and on all the while she was sick.

"Just bits and pieces. You are in all of them though." He sleepy eyes looked up at me.

"What do you remember." Emma took another sip.

"You sitting like this with me making me drink something and eat. Your hand I always felt it." I took her hand to let her know she could still have it. She smiled at me as I grasped her hand like a life line. "I remember you arguing with Susan."

"She wanted me to sleep in my room. I have been her since we got back." Emma looked up at me her eyes wide; "you have been here days and night for five days." I nodded at her staring into her blue eyes they were so different from my own I could help but be memorized by them. They were the color of the sea during a storm. "I wanted to be here when you woke up and the fever broke."

"Thank you for staying I think it would have been worse to wake up alone. I feel so helpless. I can even drink on my own I know I probably can't do anything else."

"It's the fever," I ran my fingers down her cheek again just to make sure it wasn't coming back. "I tried to keep you from shivering but I couldn't. Your muscles are weak from keeping up the shivering to try to cool you."

"Hopefully I will get better soon." I smiled to myself I hoped that too. "Do you think I can get cleaned up I feel very gross. I'm sure I need a bath and to change cloths and the sheets."

"I can ask Lucy and Susan to help you or would you rather I get someone else.

"There ok if they want to help I rather not get help from a stranger." She wrinkled her nose at that and it was the cutest thing I had seen her do.

"I will get them for you. In the meantime rest for me." Emma nodded at me and as I slipped out from next to her she slip down a little bit. I couldn't help but lean over her and kiss her hair before walking out the door to find the girls. I knew were they would be it didn't take long to find them in the sitting room. I walked in and they looked up at me, "is she awake," Lucy was excited to know every day if Emma was better.

"She is. Can one of you help her she wants to take a quick bath and change? It felt a little odd asking them for this from them but it was for her.

"Of course we can." They both put what they were doing down and followed me out the door. "How long has she been awake?" Lucy was practally dancing around me with excitement.

"Just a few minutes. I think she's feeling a little better today." It made me feel good that she was feeling better.

"I'm sure she is you have been there all the time."

I pulled Susan to a stop, "I'm sorry about the other day I was worried and scared. I don't know what came over me I felt pulled in so many different directions. Will you forgive me?"

"Of course I will Peter. And you care for her I understand that have you even let yourself realize that."

More than you think. We kept walking to Emma's room and Lucy and Susan helped Emma bathe. I did have to carry her to the bathroom I wasn't letting her walk quite yet. Someone came and got the dirty sheets and put new clean blankets and sheets on the bed while I went to get Emma a proper meal. As I sat on the couch waiting for Emma to come out I couldn't help but think over the past few days. I did care for Emma there was no denying that to anyone. I couldn't even deny it to myself anymore. After these past five days everyone knew my feelings for her. I let my work go Edmund was now handling both of our work and sending things to me as he needed.

And then there was what Emma did around me. This confused me. Even before now we were close. Maybe she was denying feelings for me too, too scared to admit them to herself as I was. I was still scared to admit that I cared deeply for her. I looked at the door as I heard the three of them laughing. Oh it would be so easy to just let myself fall for her. I already had every passing day I slipped up. I tried to distance myself and wait till we both knew what Aslan was doing but I couldn't help it.

Susan stuck her head out of the door while I was standing by the fire, "Peter if you don't want her to walk I suggest you come get her." I smiled and walked in to the bathroom Emma was sitting on a chair in a clean nightgown wet hair that was brushed straight. I walked over to her watching her smile the whole way. "How are you feeling now?"

"Much better." I could see that the short bath had taken a toll on her already.

"I have some soup for you if you're ready." Now with my sisters watching me I felt awaked.

"I'm ready when you are your my legs for now." I bent down to pick her up she puts her arms around my neck as I slid my arm under her legs. When I straighten up her face is just inches from mine. Emma never blinked she looked straight into my eyes a small smile on her lips. Lips that now were smooth from something the girls did. She smelled of the lavender soap and rose shampoo. I was locked in a trace, "Peter ummm you haven't moved anywhere."

"I know." Still I was just taking in her face until she just laid her head on my shoulder and snuggled close to me. I tightened my arms around her as I carried her to the bed that was now clean. I set her down and pulled the blankets to cover her legs. I watched as she leaned back on the stacked pillows.

Sitting next to her on the bed I watch as she closed her eyes from exhaustion. "You alright you don't look so good."

"I don't feel so good that little bit wore me out." Susan and Lucy came over and sat on the bed with us.

"I have some food for you are you hungry? I take Emma's hand that rests on the mattress in front of me. She wraps her fingers around mine.

Yes I guess that's one thing that hasn't changed. I smile at her as I squeeze her hand and retrieve the tray of food. I set the try on her other side by Lucy before sliding next to her on the bed helping her sit up to eat. I reached across her and picked the tray up and set it down in her lap. Emma reaches to start eating I slid my arm behind her shoulders despite my sisters being there. I knew at some point she would need help holding something the last thing that I wanted was for her to spill her hot soup on her lap.

I sat there with her helping her eat when something became too much for her. When she finished I moved the tray and she laid her head back on to me to rest.

Ok another chapter tonight for you guys I hope you like it. This is all I have typed up so I will have to keep going. I have a vague idea of where I'm going with it so let's hope it works out. Again please review it helps keep me going and I need it right now when I have to think up what to write.