A/N: Okay everybody! I'm going to try to do this chapter justice so hang on tight! I hope it come out as funny as I envision it in my head. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own the Hunger Games.

Chapter 10

Katniss POV

I open my eyes and roll over on our crisp clean bedsheets and fine Peeta missing. I glance at the clock hanging on our bedroom wall and sigh. Ugh, it's time to get up and get functioning. It's almost nine o'clock and I don't want to move. Then a thought runs through my mind and I sit upright instantly. Effie will more than likely be here by eleven o'clock. I spring out of bed and hop into the shower. Not waiting for the cold to turn to hot before I have my signature strawberry shampoo lathered in my hair. Peeta is so anxious to get Haymitch back that I'm certain he's bouncing out of his pants in anticipation.

I turn off the shower, dress in a purple t-shirt and jeans and then slip my feet into my slippers and head downstairs. When I get there, Peeta is sitting on the couch with Payson in his lap. Playing with his hands and feet. Payson looks like he's starting to smile now but I realize that it's probably just gas. No point ruining Peeta's fun with that knowledge so I just keep it to myself. I plop onto the brown sofa next to him and Peeta smiles. Then he exclaims with excitement. "She's gonna be here soon! I never thought I would be this excited to see Effie Trinket in my frigging life!" I laugh at Peeta and then shake my head.

"Be careful what you wish for Peeta. If they hit it off somehow, she could be living next door. We'll be up shits creek without a paddle if that happens." I explain. Peeta shakes his head. "You don't get it Katniss. If they're off having sex somewhere, Haymitch will be too busy to keep bothering us about our sex life. It's a win win for all of us. You and I both know he's lonely. Besides, they love to hate each other so this just might work."

I give him a kiss and then kiss Payson on his blonde little head. "Okay Peeta, if you say so. Where are Mom and Don?" I ask. "They went to the shops. Hey I've gotta ask you a question. My father mentioned something to me this morning but it kind of creeped me out. He asked me to speak to you about it too. Would you feel strange if he asked your mother to marry him? I told him it would weird me out. That would legally make you my step-sister. Gross." Peeta says.

I stick my tongue out and shiver from the willies. "Yeah Peeta, that's too weird. Can't they just have a private toasting for themselves? I mean, that's what really matters anyway, right? If they go to the Justice Building then everyone is going to know about it and her last name will change to Mellark." Peeta nods and then his eyes grow wide. "Katniss, do you think your mother can still have children? They've got to be using protection, right? " I shudder. "I think we need to speak to our parents about this. No more siblings for us!" I exclaim.

It isn't too much longer before Haymitch showed up with Effie in tow. Peeta had sent him to the train to pick up a package. Told him it would weigh about one hundred and twenty five pounds and be really colorful. I guess he figured it out when she got off the train. Effie comes through the door and is all excited to see us. "Katniss! Peeta! Oh, is this baby Payson? He's gorgeous!" Effie gives me a big hug, then smooths her blue suit back to it's original flawlessness and then gives Peeta a kiss on each cheek and a hug as well. Haymitch snickered and tried to make a beeline for the door. Peeta wasn't having any of that.

"Haymitch, where are you going? You said you were excited to see Effie again?" Peeta chides. Haymitch looks at him with incredulous eyes. "You must have a death wish boy. Come here so I can finish you off." Peeta smiles and turns on the charm. "Now Haymitch, that's no way to treat our guest. Effie was a big help to us during the games. All the prep work and manners. She woke you up when you were passed out drunk. You need to be nicer."

"You're right Peeta. I need to be nicer. I won't choke her when he voice reaches that octave that drives me crazy. I'll be nice, I promise." Haymitch says. Effie looks at the two of us. "First of all, I'm here to visit for a few days and catch up and second, I also have to bring back a report on District Twelve's progress for President Paylor while I am out this way. I'm also visiting other Districts on my way back home to the Capitol. President Paylor also wanted to congratulate the two of you on the birth of your son and extends an invitation to visit the Capitol, with Payson, when you feel up to it." Effie continues.

"As for my duties while I am here. I need to visit in the town and observe the rebuilding. Maybe speak to a few people and gather some notes or recommendations that they have. The Capitol wants to assist more but needs the information from the citizens while the Justice Buildings are being rebuilt. If one of you could show me around, that would be great?" Effie asks.

Peeta looks at Haymitch and smiles. "I'm sure that you could show Effie around a bit since Katniss and I are tending to Payson." Haymitch shoots daggers at Peeta. I chime in with my part in the whole scheme. I pull Effie aside and say very softly to her. "Effie, listen, if you want to get any cooperation from anyone here in District Twelve, you're gonna have to tone down your Capitol look."

I wave my hand around her so she gets what I mean and then continue. "People here still distrust the Capitol and they can't understand all of the excess and clothes and makeup. It's best if you blend in as much as possible while you're here. Look nice, look official, but look way less made up. I don't want you to get chewed up and spit out." Effie smiles a small smile in understanding. "Thank you for that lovely and graphic explanation Katniss. I'll work on it tonight."

Haymitch scoffs. "What's your problem Haymitch? Have I don't something to irritate you?" Effie asks. Haymitch crosses his eyes. "Everything about you irritates me Effie. You squeak when you talk. My fucking ears bleed at the sound of your voice. You're always bitching about manners and how to eat or drink or walk. The only relations I have with you are from the games and you were always a pain in my ass." Effie looks livid and turns red.

She gets agitated. "I WAS DOING MY JOB HAYMITCH! It's not my fault that you were drunk most of the time and didn't do your part. I can't help where I was born and raised and neither could you. I don't give a damn if you're a Victor. I will wipe this entire District with your ass if you treat me with one ounce of disrespect in public!" Effie storms away and then turns around to address me. "I'm sorry for my outburst in your home Katniss, Peeta. Can you please show me to my room? I'd like to try to calm down and rest for a while."

Peeta, Haymitch and I stare at her, speechless before I come to. I show her to her room and then finally find my voice. "Nice job Effie. I'm proud of you." I say. Effie smiles, her powdered face cracking. "Thank you Katniss. I've let him get away with it for far too long. He's sober now. There's no excuse for his bad behavior anymore." I nod and close the door behind me. When I get out to the living room, the breeze from the front door slamming behind Haymitch makes my hair blow.

Peeta looks at me and smiles. "That went better than I planned."

Peeta POV

Later on that night, Effie took her dinner in her room, still upset over Haymitch and exhausted from the train ride across country. Haymitch avoided the house like the plague so it only left Katniss and I with our parents. I decide that I'm going to get it all out in the open so I can stop mulling it over in my head. May as well know where they stand.

We all sit down to a meatloaf dinner that Katniss prepared with string beans and a fresh loaf of bread. I Look at Katniss for permission and then begin this awkward conversation. "Um, Dad, Lily. Katniss and I had a conversation earlier that made us a bit uncomfortable and we decided to talk about it with the two of you before it drives us mad. It's really awkward so I want to apologize in advance." I dab my mouth with my napkin and then press forward.

"We uh, were wondering if you intended to um, make your 'union' legal anytime in the future?" I ask as I clear my throat. I swear I hear my father choke on his mouthful. Dad looks at me. "Peeta, is this about our conversation this morning? I think you're reading too much into it. Lily and I have only even discussed it ourselves a couple of times." I nod and then continue.

"It is Dad but I'm glad that it came up. Katniss and I just want to let you both know how we feel in the matter. We would appreciate it, greatly, if you didn't legally marry, only because it would change Lily's last name and for lack of a better way to say it, make Katniss my step-sister. We just don't want any awkward public reaction to something like that. We would prefer if you just did a private toasting to celebrate your union, if and when the time comes."

Katniss adds her two cents to the matter too. "We just think that because Peeta and I are public figures, so to speak, it would really be fodder. If it was just District Twelve then we could explain and contain something like that. The other part of it would be explaining it to Payson and any ridicule that might face him as a result. We want to keep the gossip to a minimum." She explains.

I speak again. "We're both thrilled for you, that you both have a second chance at happiness. We'll respect whatever you decide to do but we just wanted to voice our opinions on the matter." Katniss turns red and then gets to the final part. "Oh, and mom, please, no children. We don't want to share a sibling in this lifetime." Lily looks mortified and then speaks. "I think your concerns are all valid and I can assure you that we will abide by all of them. They are not unreasonable at all. Love is more than a piece of paper and that's why we have the toasting. You kids can relax. We hear you loud and clear."

We finish our dinner and then make our way to bed. Payson sleeps in Dad and Lily's room tonight. It's funny because even though we have alone time, Katniss and I fall asleep almost instantly.

The following morning, Katniss and I make our way downstairs and find Dad and Lily at the table. Dad is feeding Payson a bottle. I'm sure Katniss would have rather breastfed him. She looks like her breasts are going to explode. I give her a small smile and then pour myself a cup of coffee. We're still on decaf because she's breastfeeding. It's still really good though. I make our mugs and hand Katniss her favorite green mug. We sit side by side and Katniss rests her disheveled head on my shoulder, trying to wipe the sleep out of her eyes.

A few minutes later we hear the patter of high heels heading into the kitchen and I swear, I don't know who is standing in front of me in my house. Katniss and I look at each other and take in the vision that is Effie Trinket. My father and Lily are equally surprised.

Effie indeed toned down her appearance. She has on a hot pink short sleeve dress with matching high heels and a floral scarf tied around her neck. Gone is the white makeup and dramatic lipstick and rouge. Her skin is a natural ivory with light green eye makeup and pink cheeks and lips. Her hair is blonde. Much lighter than mine and it reaches her shoulders in soft waves. It's not wild and is naturally flowing to compliment her face.

I am speechless but Katniss saves us all. "Effie you're fucking HOT!" I can't believe that language just came out of her mouth in front of everyone else but she pretty much summed it up in those four words. Effie smiles. "Why thank you Katniss. I did my best to tone it down but I still had very bright colors. I hope it's acceptable for my visit." Her voice even sounds normal, stripped of the Capitol. I come out of my stupor and then rush to call Haymitch over to escort Effie. About twenty minutes later, Haymitch comes through the door and stops in his tracks.

Katniss hits my leg in repeated excitement. Haymitch and Effie stare at each other for what seems like forever. Haymitch looks all around himself and then to me. "Am I seeing this right Peeta. You didn't put some hallucinogenic in my beverage last night did you?" Haymitch asks. I shake my head. "No Haymitch, Effie just looks fucking SMOKING! I say and Katniss stifles a giggle with her hand. Dad and Lily get up and wish Effie a great day and then leave for the shops.

Katniss and I stare Effie and Haymitch like we're watching a great story unfold.

Effie grabs her jacket and her purse and then motions for the door. "Are you coming Haymitch? District Twelve awaits." She says and then steps out into the sunshine. Haymitch looks at me and I wink at him. Haymitch stares at me and then speaks."Peeta, what have you done boy?" He asks.

I smirk and laugh, Katniss laughs with me. "Payback is a bitch my friend."