Uzumaki Naruto: Konoha Marksman Chapter 10: A Month's training part 1, a naruto fanfic

Konoha Marksman Chapter 10: A Month's Training

--------------------------

Disclaimer: NARUTO is the property of Masashi Kishimoto and Viz Media. All other trademarks mentioned herein belong to their respective owners.

"The craziest dreams are often the most profound." --Sigmund Freud

Naruto began the next morning like usual. Waking up early, he went on a jog and added some weight to the training rucksack he had. Upon completing his 20-minute mile, he returned home for a shower and then ate breakfast just as Kyle, Ryan, and Ike got up for the day. Still, Recent events weighed on Naruto's mind, and he was distracted by the fact that today, he went through his morning routine alone. Even more distracting was the dream he had during the night.

Flashback

------------

Naruto was in a large room devoid of any real furniture or windows. On one side of the room was Naruto on the other, a large dark mass – wait, now it started to define itself – it looked to be about a dozen humanlike shapes, and in the midst of the room was a customized AK-47 assault rifle with two pairs of 30-round magazines. The situation dissolved into a temporarily one-sided and lethal game not unlike dodgeball as Naruto ducked and weaved through a hail of kunai, shuriken, and projectile jutsu before he snatched the assault rifle and rolled for cover behind a few crates. Acting quickly, he rocked one of the pairs of taped magazines into the magazine well, yanked the charging handle back before letting it go, and he flipped the fire selector to full-automatic as he began firing two-shot bursts into the head or chest of each hostile. Ducking back down to reload, Naruto flipped the taped magazines over to reach the second magazine and he had just rocked it into place when he felt a presence behind him. Racking the charging handle as he whirled around, he looked up just in time to see two blood-red Sharingan eyes staring into his own. Suddenly a katana appeared and sliced Naruto's AK-47 in two from the barrel all the way down to the stock, and then was brought up again, this time to come down on his head.

- - - - - - - - - - -

End Flashback

Naruto visibly shuddered upon remembering that dream and then shook his head. 'I gotta stop thinking like this. The future doesn't matter at this moment; we'll cross that bridge when we get to it. What matters right now is training. My conventional techniques won't work against someone like Neji, and I can't always be using bullets. It's time I started using clan techniques, or at least the stuff dad invented. Kakashi-sensei knew him well, maybe I can start by asking him.'

With his mind at ease, Naruto finished his breakfast in silence while Kyle, Ryan, and Ike drank some coffee to get the sleep out of their eyes. Now that they've had some caffeine in their system, the three were willing to converse about important topics.

"Does anyone know where a guy can get laid around here?" asked Kyle. Immediately, three separate spit takes ensued and both coffee and (in Naruto's case) tea were sprayed in droplets on the kitchen counter. Ryan glared at Kyle.

"Don't say that!Especially not around the kid!" hissed Ryan before Naruto could fully comprehend what Kyle had just said.

"Pff." scoffed Kyle. "You're such a mother hen, Ryan. Besides, this kid's got a girlfriend! He's got it made, and 'the talk' can be done anytime."

Kyle found himself the target of a killing glare from Naruto before he found himself on the floor, grasping his pained crotch and equally pained... well, if you know what Kakashi is infamous for in terms of a certain jutsu, you know what's hurting.

"Damn!" said Naruto. "When Kakashi-sensei does it, the vict-- er, target always takes off into the sky!"

"Wasn't that a little much, Naruto? After all, it is pretty early, and when a man wakes up even after his first taste of real coffee, he's still vulnerable to saying things most vulgar and unusual. In this case, he was resuming his train of thought from last night."

"You mean this is kind of all he thought about last night?"

"Pretty much, yeah."

Naruto was a tad irritated that one of his friends was so... so... he couldn't even think of an adjective. But it was certainly derogatory, he just couldn't think of one. Sure he was awake, but like Ryan said, too early to think properly.

"That's enough of that." said Naruto, feeling displeased at Kyle's behavior. "I'd like to change the subject and talk about something more important. Are you guys allowed to fly yet? Are you done with your ninja training?"

"One thing at a time, Naruto. First, yes, we're allowed to fly now. They just cleared us for the task yesterday. As for ninja training, the hard part's over. We've got leadership training left over, and we don't have to do that until later in the day. That it?"

"Kind of. You see, I have one month to train for the Chunin exam finals. I need your help, because I need some fast rope practice. I'm looking to ride the line between safety and speed, and I need to be able to do it without night vision equipment or illumination."

"That's a tall order, Naruto. No one really fast ropes at night, especially without NVG's. But, I'll see what I can do."

"Thanks." replied Naruto. Looking at the clock, he realized he had to leave. "Would you look at the time. Later, fellas. I gotta go."

Naruto walked down to the armory and picked out his weapons.

"Back to basics this month, so no 416 for me just yet." said Naruto to himself. Opening the pistol section, he picked out a Beretta M92FS automatic service pistol, the standard sidearm for United States military and police forces around the world. Its reliability was decent, and it packed 15 rounds of ammunition. To top it off, the round was not as loud as a .45 caliber, but on the same token, it did not possess the same amount of stopping power, which was probably the reason for the generous magazine capacity. Naruto also grabbed 4 magazines for the gun , stuffed one into the grip, and placed the rest in 3 different magazine pouches.

He then moved to another section of the armory and ran his finger along the gun rack full of various assault rifles until he found what he was looking for. Naruto reached up and plucked out a completely stock Kalashnikov AK-47 assault rifle. No bells, no whistles, just 2.83 feet of stamped sheet metal and polished pine tree wood, every inch of the gun originally designed in some way to contribute to stopping the enemies of the Soviet Union dead in their tracks -- just add bullets. Of course, Naruto had used it to stop other enemies; it wasn't like the AK-47 was designed specifically and solely for killing communist opponents. Attaching a 3-point sling to it and rocking a 30-round magazine into place, Naruto hefted the gun over his shoulder and head and then let the gun rest at his side before grabbing 3 extra magazines and a drum magazine. Naruto then walked out of Uzumaki mansion, mounted his dirtbike, and rode to Konoha Hospital.

At the hospital, Naruto found Kakashi waiting in the lobby for Sasuke's checkup to finish.

"Ohayo, Kakashi-sensei." greeted Naruto.

"Ohayo, Naruto-kun. What brings you here?" asked the Jounin.

"Funny you should ask. You knew my father pretty well, right?"

"Yes, I did, and I have a hunch as to where this conversation is going. Look, Naruto. As much as I would like to train you, I'm the only other person in town who has the Sharingan aside from Sasuke, and I have to train him in its use, or he'll be left out in the cold. I'm sorry I can't train you, Naruto. But, I've found someone else willing to train you."

"Who would that be?"

"Me."

Naruto looked over Kakashi's shoulder to see a man with a Konoha Bandanna, Frameless Sunglasses, and a Jounin outfit, minus the vest.

"Hey, I've seen this guy before!" exclaimed Naruto. "I remember I was practicing my Recon Skills on various people in town, when I spotted this guy coming out of the Pink—mmph!"

Naruto was interrupted by the aforementioned man giving him a noogie while muffling his words with his hand.

"Don't say a word, Naruto." whispered the man. "Get me through this without embarrassing me, and I'll treat you to a Ramen Lunch."

"U ot or elf uh eel (You got yourself a deal)." Said Naruto, his mouth still covered. The man released him, and Kakashi was still wondering what transpired.

"Naruto, what did you say? Did it have something to do with Ebisu here and the Pink Boutique?"

"It was nothing, Sense. Now that I think about it, it was probably some other perv."

"...ok."

"Well, we best be off, Kakashi-san." said Ebisu. "Come along, Naruto."

"Right." said Naruto, following Ebisu out of the hospital. As Naruto passed by his bike, he sent it back to Uzumaki Mansion through a summoning scroll. Ebisu was moderately impressed. Wordlessly, the two continued to Ichiraku Ramen Bar, where while they ate, Naruto finally spoke.

"Ebisu-sensei, what sort of training am I going through?"

"Chakra Control." replied Ebisu dryly.

"Why?"

Ebisu pulled down an animated chart and began to explain. "Well, for starters, while you have some high-level techniques at your disposal, you need higher Chakra Control in order to master them. Kakashi-san noticed that while you are relatively good at replicating Yondaime's Jutsus, you will need perfect Chakra Control in order to fully control the precision of those Kage-level Jutsu."

Ebisu then showed a chibi version of Sakura, now with a Halo. "From what Kakashi has told me, Sakura had been known in her class for absolutely perfect Chakra control. Now were she to have your Chakra reserve levels, she would be able to land perfectly in the center of a bullseye into which a kunai has been planted for using Hiraishin no Jutsu."

Ebisu then did one of Sasuke. "As for Sasuke, he tends to put a little too much Chakra into his attacks and jutsu, and as a result, if he were to attempt Hiraishin no Jutsu, he'd overshoot the target by a foot or two."

Ebisu finally did one of Naruto. "As for you, Naruto, your results would be completely random. Your Level of Chakra control fluctuates, and as a result, you will either overshoot or fall a few feet short, so you are being forced to compensate." thus ended Ebisu's explanation.

"So what sort of Chakra training am I doing?"

"Water Walking."

"Wait... What?"

"You heard me."

Naruto shot Ebisu a 'You've got to be kidding me' look. Then, "We are not water walking."

"Care to tell me why you're so averse?"

"Well, Do I look like Jesus to you?"

"Ah, forget about those damn western religions for a moment. I can't believe those bastards made such a spectacle about a simple Chakra Control Exercise."

"And another thing; the way I was taught, staying underwater during combat will keep you alive longer."

Naruto pulled out his own sketch pad, and within minutes, had a working frame-by-frame demonstrational manga, all of it in Chibi/ Super-Deformed Format. The moment he was done, he showed Ebisu the mini-manga, explaining as he went along. The first panel featured a Navy SEAL clad in full gear waving to the viewer.

"Ok, let's take your typical Navy SEAL, who has learned to master underwater insertion techniques." said Naruto as he flipped the page to another panel. "When inserting into an area where there's bound to be sentries, searchlights, and probably snipers, he tries to stay underwater as much as possible and makes sure that he or she does not give any indication that they are even in the water. That includes scuba gear that has a rebreather to keep any telltale bubbles from rising to the surface. Now observe,"

Naruto then flipped the page to begin animating an amphibious assault sequence. " as the SEAL stays relatively deep underwater with his team, well away from the water line. Though there maybe searchlights, sentries with binoculars and night vision goggles as well as snipers with night scopes, note how they are never found by the searchlights or anything else."

Naruto flipped onto another page. "Now take that same Navy SEAL and have him master the water-walking exercise. Hell, even have his Team join his ability level. They all run towards their objective atop the water, perfectly controlling their Chakra. Then, a searchlight spots them. Two of his team members are downed as a result. A sentry spots him and his teammate. His partner is swiftly taken out by a burst of assault rifle fire. The lone SEAL has a chance of making it onto shore and then, POW!"

Naruto had flipped through many pages to show a detailed flipbook animation of the Chibi/SD Navy SEAL taking a bullet to the head and consequently having his brains spilled into the water.

"The water-walking SEAL does not survive, and his entire team is wiped out. Here, Let me rewind and play it again so you get this through your head."

Ebisu was a little disturbed at the gory animation Naruto drew. "Please, Naruto! Enough! I'm trying to eat!"

"Look, what I'm saying here is that even if I do get water walking down pat, I don't see myself using it or having a practical use for that technique."

And with that, the two ate the rest of their meal in silence. Soon, the two were finished, and Ebisu paid for 14 bowls of Ramen, two of them his and the other twelve belonged to Naruto. Luckily, Naruto reimbursed the Jounin, who would've been flat broke for the rest of the day. The two walked off to the hot springs bathhouse (though Naruto wasn't informed of this and was thoroughly surprised and even a little suspicious when they got there).

Meanwhile, Inside Naruto's mind...

"One more turn and... there! Red side is done!" said Kyuubi, proud of himself. "Now for the other 5 sides of this thing. Let's solve blue side next."

Kyuubi turned the Rubik's Cube about in the palm of his hands. He sweatdropped when he saw that the blue panels were scattered all over the rest of the cube.

"I'm very tempted to relocate the stickers, but that would be cheating. Well, gotta press on and do my best not to screw up red side."

- - - - - - - - - -

Naruto and Ebisu arrived at the hot spring bathhouses for the water-walking exercise, and Ebisu started the lesson immediately.

"All right then, to start off, let me show you how to perform the technique you have to practice. Unlike tree walking, where you could keep a set amount of chakra to stick yourself to a surface, you have to adjust the flow of your chakra during water walking to stay above the surface. Here, watch."

Ebisu formed the ram seal until his feet were bathed in Chakra. Then, he nonchalantly strode onto the surface of the bathhouse's water supply. "See? It's easy!"

"For you, maybe. I'm still quite hesitant about this. What if a sniper picks me off from a thousand yards?"

"For the last time, Naruto, no sniper is going to pick you off. You're in the safety of Konoha!"

"Oh yeah, I feel real safe surrounded by a bandwagon load of crazed prejudiced villagers who would like nothing better than to see my brains splattered on the ground by some bastard with a rifle."

"Naruto! Be rational and stop being so paranoid! No one is going to kill you! I'm here to see to it that you don't get killed during your training!"

"Fine. I still think this is a really stupid technique, though."

Naruto dropped his weapons and spare magazine pouches on the ground until there was only the main platform onto which the pouches were mounted. Forming the ram seal, he held it as he took a few uneasy steps onto the water until he lost control of his chakra flow and dropped into the water, which was steaming hot.

"YEEOW! I'M BOILING LIKE A GODDAMN LOBSTER HERE!" shouted Naruto as he hurriedly scrambled out of the water.

"Sorry about that, Naruto. But there's a reason they call these places hot springs." said Ebisu, barely concealing an amused grin.

"Sorry, na-roo-toe, but there's a reason they call these places hot springs, blah, blah blah, I'm a total asshole and closet pervert." muttered Naruto, mocking Ebisu's words. Standing up on the bank, Naruto formed the Ram Seal again and walked onto the hot water, getting further this time before scalding himself by being suddenly immersed in the hot water. Naruto repeated this process a few more times, getting further out with each try. Ebisu watched with mirth in his eyes, impressed that Naruto was progressing so quickly. Suddenly, the sound of giggling caught his ears, and he turned to see a white-haired man.Ebisu was immediately offended at the shameless display of pervertedness.

"You there! Get away from that fence at once and avert your gaze! I will not have such dishonorable acts performed in my presence!"

"Hm? Who dares interrupt my research?" asked the white-haired man.

"Your so-called 'research' is merely vulgar peeking! Get away from that fence!"

"How about you take a nice flight?" asked the white-haired man. A large orange toad suddenly appeared below him, and it promptly lashed out its tongue to hit Ebisu in the face. Ebisu was sent flying skywards, and then just as quickly crashed to the ground unconscious. Naruto got out of the water and walked over to Ebisu. Kneeling down, he reared back the palm of his hand and delivered a hard slap to Ebisu's face. Not getting a response, he tried again with the back of his hand. Nothing. Naruto repeated this until it was clear to him Ebisu would not wake up with such a weak method. So Naruto flipped Ebisu onto his stomach, walked around to the Jounin's lower back area, crouched down, and formed the ram seal.

"Taijutsu Ougi: Sennen Goroshi(Taijutsu Supreme Technique: 1000 Years of Death)!"

Naruto shoved his fingers into the target, but still Ebisu did not wake up. Frustrated, Naruto only had one person to blame for all this. He turned to the white-haired man.

"Excuse, me sir."

"Hm? What is it, Kid?"

"Um, you knocked out my instructor. Was that really necessary?"

"Of course. He interrupted my research."

Naruto flew into a rage and began screaming at the top of his lungs. "RESEARCH?! RESEARCH?! ALL YOU'RE DOING IS PEEPING ON THE WOMEN IN THE BATHHOUSE WHILE THEY ARE COMPLETELY UNAWARE OF SOME DIRTY OLD MAN WATCHING THEM!"

The women inside the bathhouse heard this and scattered immediately. Their frightened screams were not unnoticed by the man, who desperately pleaded for them to come back, but to no avail. Frustrated, he turned to Naruto.

"Now, look at what you did!"

"Look at what you did!" retorted Naruto, gesturing to Ebisu's unconscious form. "It's only fair that you train me now, seeing as you incapacitated my instructor!"

"I'll only train you if there's something you can offer me that I'm interested in."

Naruto slapped his palm on his face and dragged it down. 'God, I can't believe I have to resort to this.'

Naruto caught the white-haired man walking away.

"Kid, if you don't have anything of interest, I'm going now."

"Wait!"

"To wait is not something that interests me."

"Breasts!"

"Wha?" said the man, freezing in his tracks.

"The size of volleyballs!"

Not taking another step, the man pivoted in place, one leg still in midair.

"Breasts the size of volleyballs you say? I'm listening."

Naruto caught up with the white-haired man and looked around to make sure no one was watching. In a lower voice than usual, he elaborated on the subject of interest.

"Six years ago, I went to foreign lands to study advanced hand-to-hand combat techniques among other things. While I was there, I saw women with breasts that were invitingly large. And I have proof of it in pictures and movies so erotic, to openly show them to you would be too vulgar for the common man. But I am willing to give it to you, as it is a win-win situation for you and the subjects of your research. They don't get bothered, and you don't get beat up. Basically, you can do research in the privacy of your own home, and all you need is a television, a Tape Player or DVD player, and a comfortable chair. And then, sit back, and prepare to be bombarded with enough research material to last you a year."

"Where do I sign?"

"All you need is to train me for this month. Each day, I'll bring you more research material, discreetly, of course, in the form of print, photography, and video."

"You've got yourself a deal, kid. What's your name?"

"Uzumaki Naruto, sir. Konoha's Marksman."

'Uzumaki?'thought Jiraiya. 'Is he related to Arashi? I mean, that is what he signed on the toad contract, but he said that was just so his name on the contract would be complete...'

"The name's Jiraiya, kid." said the white-haired man. "And I'm the Toad Sage."

"Um...who?"

"You mean, you've never heard of the might--"

"I've got a much better name in mind. Namely, Ero-sennin. Much more realistic, I think!"

"Um, you're not going to make this a habit, right?"

"I'm not making any promises, Ero-sennin."

"Oh, boy...Well anyway, follow me. I've got a spot where I can train you in private."

"Lead the way, then."

Half an hour later, Naruto dropped his gear on the ground where Jiraiya had led him. It was an area deep in the lush Konoha forest, in a clearing with a clear blue stream running through it. Naruto gave a whistle.

"Wow. This place isn't half bad! How'd you find out about this place, Jiraiya-sensei?"

"Finally, some respect." said Jiraiya. "I always go here, especially in the summer because there's a nearby waterfall for me to do my research, behold."

"Damn, sorry I asked, Ero-sennin."

"Stop calling me that!"

"Whatever. I'm gonna try out water walking. You tell me if I'm making any particular mistakes."

"All right, then. Go."

"Wait, let me do something first."

Naruto began removing his boots and tactical gear until he was down to his woodland camouflage boxers and his forehead protector.

"If I'm gonna get wet, I might as well leave my other clothes to dry. These boxers double as swimming trunks, anyway."

Naruto formed the ram seal and began gathering chakra to his feet. Jiraiya watched, until his face transformed into a look of awe.

"Amazing!" said Jiraiya, breaking Naruto's concentration.

"What? What is it?" asked Naruto excitedly.

"You know, you get pretty sexy when your clothes start coming off."

"Stop right there, old man, and don't come any closer. The way I was raised, the key phrase was 'Don't ask, don't tell.', and I certainly do not swing that way."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Take it easy Naruto, I mean that as a compliment! Come now, you're in so much better shape than I am, and that's saying a lot! You're only what, 12? If you went shirtless in public, you'd be beating the ladies off with a stick! Guys my age would kill to have those washboard abs, man! I mean, I'm in pretty good shape myself--"

"What shape? Round?"

"Very funny. But as I was saying, I'm in pretty good shape myself, but kid, you've got it made!"

"Mm-hmm. Now if we're done discussing physique here, I'd like to continue my training..."

"Yeah, yeah. Do your thing, kid."

Naruto formed the Ram seal once more until Chakra flowed to his feet at a steady pace. Naruto then walked off the bank and into the flowing stream. He actually got a quarter of the way across before he began having difficulty with his Chakra. Soon enough, Naruto was struggling to maintain balance, and then—splashdown. Naruto waded over to the bank and climbed out. Jiraiya had observed, and gave his analysis.

"Something seems to be messing up your Chakra flow, kid. And I think I know what it is. So, if you let me do so, I'll do something real quick, but you have to close your eyes and keep your hands above your head."

"No funny stuff?" asked Naruto, rather supicious of Jiraiya's motives.

"No funny stuff, I promise. If I don't keep my promise, I'll let you shoot me in the kneecaps with one of those weapons of yours."

"Get it over with, then."

"All right, here we go..."

Naruto locked his hands behind his head and kept his eyes shut. Jiraiya opened his palm and held his hand over Naruto's navel while he flowed chakra to his fingers. A few seconds of the Chakra exposure revealed the seal that locked Kyuubi into Naruto.

'Hm, so this is the much-heralded seal Arashi used to lock Kyuubi away into this kid. Hell of a piece of work. One thing that bothers me though. Is this kid in front of me Arashi's son? I mean after all, what father would willingly do this to his own son? I'll have to think about that later. A few more seconds exposure should reveal anything more that I need to find... there.'

The seal revealed further details, specifically the markings of Orochimaru's 5-point seal. Jiraiya did away with that obstruction by creating a counter to said seal, with 5 flares of chakra appearing on each of his fingers. He touched them to each of the 5-point seal's markings, which disappeared. Naruto however, was ticklish in that spot, and fell back giggling.

"You all right, kid?" asked Jiraiya.

"Yeah-- hee, hee!-- I'm just a little ticklish, everyone has a spot like that." responded Naruto, getting up.

"You feel any different?"

"A little." replied Naruto. "Feels like everything's in its right place now. It used to feel like I was missing a little extra something."

"Good. Now try water walking again."

"Ok, then. Here we go."

Naruto focused the Chakra to his feet and as soon as it was flowing properly enough, he walked out onto the flowing stream. He kept walking until he reached what he thought to be the middle of the stream and stood there for a good minute. Cautiously, he opened one eye, and then both, and then one finger at a time, released the ram seal. Another minute passed, and he was still above the water, the surface of the stream flowing around the soles of his feet. His face broke into a grin as he began running upstream and downstream on the water's surface, not sinking even a centimeter. At the discovery of the new skill, Naruto shouted for joy and made a joke to Jiraiya.

"Oi, Ero-sennin! Toss me a hat and cane! I'm goiung to start a tap-dance number right here, right now, on top of the water! I just mastered the friggin' water walk!"

"Enough showboating Naruto." retorted Jiraiya. "You've proved your point. You can water walk. Whoop-dee-do."

"Spoilsport."

"Get dressed and grab your gear. We're moving on to another lesson."

10:00 A.M.

"Damn! Another tadpole."

Naruto looked at the worm-like amphibian in front of him with disdain before sending it back to where it came from. The genin was understandably flustered; he'd signed a summoning contract about half an hour ago and got to work on the technique right away. Why wasn't he making any progress, he wondered?

Flashback

"Now for our next lesson." said Jiraiya. "Tell me, kid. Are you at all familiar with summoning?"

"To an extent." replied Naruto. "I know how to summon from scrolls."

"Excellent. That means this might be a faster lesson for you, then."

Jiraiya then pulled the large scroll mounted on his back onto the ground.

"First, we'll have you sign this contract."

Jiraiya unrolled the scroll for the Toad contract and set it down in front of Naruto. Naruto pulled out a pen, but Jiraiya shook his head.

"Naruto, this is a blood contract. You're gonna have to bleed a little in order to sign this."

Sighing, Naruto pricked his thumb on the tip of his survival knife until he got a relatively controlled blood flow. He signed the contract as Jiraiya instructed him to and placed his fingerprints on the last box. It was then that a certain set of Kanji caught his attention, but before he could get a closer look at it, Jiraiya snapped the scroll shut.

"All right kid. You're set to go. Perform the Boar, Dog, bird, Monkey, and Ram seals, in that order, and then slam your palm on the ground to summon."

"That's it?"

"That's all there is to it. Give it a try."

Grinning, Naruto channeled Chakra to his hands and blazed through the seals accurately. Slamming his hand down on the ground, a large bang followed by a cloud of smoke occurred.

'Oh boy, I hope I summoned something big!' thought Naruto.

The smoke cleared to reveal... a tadpole.

"Huh?" said Naruto, dumbfounded. Jiraiya, meanwhile, raised his eyebrow.

"Let me try again! I'll get a frog this time!"

Naruto repeated the hand seals and slammed his hand down on the ground. Another bang and smoke, and again, a tadpole. Naruto kept repeating the process since then.

End Flashback

Naruto was frustrated. For half an hour, he had been summoning nothing but tadpoles. Jiraiya had gotten bored, too. He had already been able to do his research, go out for some booze, and do research again. In fact, he was asleep until Naruto unleashed a great yell into the blue sky above.

"DO YOU HATE ME, KAMI-SAMA? HAVE I DONE SOMETHING WRONG? PLEASE, PLEASE! LET ME SUMMON SOMETHING OTHER THAN A TADPOLE!"

Jiraiya woke up with a start, and as he saw Naruto draw in a deep breath to yell some more, he interrupted the boy.

"Naruto, don't be so loud. Now what's the problem?"

"I can't summon anything better than a tadpole is what's the problem."

Jiraiya sat back and pondered something for a moment. After about a minute, he spoke to Naruto, who had watched him intently.

"Naruto, I've got a possible solution to your problem. However, there is one stipulation. You have to acknowledge now that you might lose your life using this process. Do you understand?"

"I do understand, Jiraiya-sensei." replied Naruto sternly. He didn't like the thought that he could die learning to summon, but if he played his cards right, he'd keep his life and still be able to summon something much greater than a tadpole.

"Good. First thing I want you to do is exhaust your current supply of Chakra as best you can."

"This is gonna be easy!" said Naruto cockily. He quickly formed a single hand seal that he'd known about for a good long while.

"TAJUU KAGE BUNSHIN NO JUTSU!"

At the uttering of these words, the clearing suddenly filled with smoke after a loud bang. A veritable batallion of Kage Bunshins appeared in the clearing waiting for orders.

"Ten-hut!" shouted Naruto. At once, all the clones stood at attention as their creator gave them instructions.

"Listen up! In a few minutes, you all are to follow me jogging one klick upstream on the water itself. You all know the water walk by now, so I don't want any excuses. Meet me at the top of the waterfall, where you will recieve further instructions. Your orders are given. Fall in and follow me!"

Jiraiya watched with interest as the Kage Bunshins fell in behind his jogging student as they proceeded upstream. Even more surprising was the running cadences Naruto instructed them to recite.

"Marine Corps, Fighting Machine!" Naruto called out. In chorus, the Kage Bunshins sang:

"Way back when at the dawn of time,
In the heart of Death Valley, where the sun don't shine.

The roughest, toughest fighter ever known was made,
From an M16 and a live grenade!

He was a lean, mean, green fighting machine,
He proudly bore the title of U.S. Marine!"

"Marine Corps, I wish all the ladies!" cried Naruto. The Kage Bunshins responded with a lewd running cadence that Jiraiya found himself chuckling at as their voices carried over the wind:

"I wish all the ladies were pies on a shelf,
and I was a baker, so I'd eat 'em all myself!

I wish all the ladies were bricks in a pile,
and I was a mason, I'd lay 'em all with style.

I wish all the ladies were bells in a tower,
and I was a bell boy, I'd bang 'em ev'ry hour.

I wish all the ladies were holes in a road,
and I was a dump truck, I'd fill 'em with my load!"

Naruto allowed himself a small smile before calling out another running cadence. "Army, Airborne Ranger!" The Kage bunshins sang:

"C-130 Rolling down the strip,
64 Rangers on a one-way trip.

Mission Top Secret, Destination unknown,
They don't know if they're ever coming home!

Stand-up, Hook-up, Shuffle to the door,
Jump right out and count to four.

If my main don't open wide,
I got a reserve by my side.

If that one should fail me too,
Look out below, there's a Ranger comin' through!"

Naruto, noting that there was enough time for one more cadence, shouted "Blood on the risers!" The Kage Bunshin behind him sang to the tune of "Battle Hymn of the Republic":

"He was just a rookie trooper and he surely shook with fright
He checked off his equipment and made sure his pack was tight;
He had to sit and listen to those awful engines roar,
"You ain't gonna jump no more!"