"Should we get a hold of Tien and the others?" Trunks called through the blustering wind as they flew towards the place Gohan was leading them.
"There's no time for that now," Piccolo answered loudly.
"This is it!" Gohan announced as he slowed to a stop in mid-air.
"So how do we get up there?" Catie asked, staring up at the clouds that rained down upon her.
"You just have to press your way through," Gohan answered, slicking rain from his eyes with the heels of his hands. "It's a really weird sensation."
"I don't like it!" Lindsey added.
Gohan shook his head, but agreed, "It does kind'a feel like you're being smothered. Just… Just do it as quick as possible and it's not so bad."
Jenny wasn't waiting for any more instruction. She rose quickly towards the clouds, intending to burst through them, and cried out in shock as she hit them and bounced back.
"Not that quick," Gohan muttered and raised up beside her. "You gotta ease your way into them, like this." He pressed his hand against the cloud firmly and Jenny watched as his arm began to sink into it. She mimicked him, and stared in surprise as the solidity gave way to the consistency of thick mud. The others followed suit and soon they all found themselves sliding up through the thick, compressed clouds.
If it hadn't been for the thought of Paige being so close, Jenny thought she might not have been able to make it through the clouds. It was so incredibly pitch black and the clouds pressed in on her so tight, it made her feel terribly claustrophobic. Rainwater poured continuously over her as she rose through the thick clouds; she felt as though she might drown. She felt her hand break the surface of the clouds and strong, cold fingers wrapped around her wrist, pulling her free. She sucked in a lungful of fresh, dry air and found Seventeen smiling at her. "Thanks," she gasped at him and he nodded.
"Well that was unpleasant," Vegeta growled, hauling himself to his feet.
"This place looks a lot bigger from the outside," Leelee stated, her hands on her hips, staring up at the monstrous castle.
"Do we just go in the front door?" Gohan asked quietly. "I mean, they know we're coming."
"It could be a trap," Piccolo said.
"The whole thing's a trap," Vegeta stated. "They made that pretty clear."
"We can't just stroll up there and ring the doorbell!" Trunks protested.
"Why the hell not?" Leelee asked. "Let's just go at this head-on."
"I'm with Leelee," Catie added.
"Quit being such hotheads and think," Seventeen said levelly in his cold voice.
"HOTHEADS?" Catie and Leelee screeched.
The argument that ensued was ridiculous, everyone shouting over each other, trying to convince everyone else why their own plan of attack was the best.
"YOU CHICKENSHIT-"
"CAN'T GO IN THE FRONT –"
"DO YOU WANNA END UP IN A GLASS BOX AGAIN?"
"SAY IT TO MY FACE!"
"-HAVE TO WATCH OUT FOR-"
"I WILL PUT MY SIZE NINE STRAIGHT UP YOUR-"
"-GUARDING THE BABY-"
"IT'S ALWAYS A TRAP!"
A bloodcurdling scream rent the air as Lindsey jumped and grabbed the nearest person (who happened to be Goku), digging her nails into his arm.
"Ouch! Hey, what-?" he cried as she pointed at the front steps to the castle.
"The fuck is that?!" she wailed, her eyes full of fear. Her voice cracked. "What the fuck IS that?"
"I wish you'd watch your mouth," he scolded quietly and then looked up at the castle.
The tall double doors had been flung wide open. A tiny girl with long platinum blonde hair was standing as still as a statue on the top stair. Her loose, stringy curls hung to her waist. She wore a long, old fashioned white sleeping gown trimmed in lace and a sad-looking teddy bear was dangling from her left hand. Her nearly-white pale blue eyes stared blankly at them all.
"Lindsey, calm down, it's just a little kid," Goku said calmly.
"The hell it is," she whispered, moving to hide behind her father-in-law. Still keeping a death grip on his arm, she peered around his waist to glimpse the girl again, shrieked, and ducked back behind Goku once more.
Goku looked wide-eyed at Gohan. "What's her problem?"
Gohan couldn't keep the exasperation from his voice. "She believes in ghosts."
Catie thought she understood Lindsey's fear. The little girl was creepy as hell, and that was putting it nicely. She didn't suppose she'd ever seen a ghost before, but if she had, it would look like that little girl.
Jenny, on the other hand, felt as though she should help the child. She stepped forward, closing the gap between herself and the foot of the stairs, looking up at the girl. "Are you okay?" she asked kindly.
The little girl didn't respond. She didn't even move. She just continued to stare straight ahead with that dead look in her eyes.
Jenny climbed the first few steps cautiously. "Are you okay, honey?" she asked a little louder.
"Jenny," Piccolo growled in a warning voice.
Jenny looked over her shoulder at Piccolo. "Maybe she can help us."
"Or maybe she's here to lure you into a bad situation," he replied.
"Jennifer, you're being foolish," Vegeta scolded.
She squared her shoulders and turned back to the unmoving girl. "Do you need help?"
With a movement so slow it was almost hard to see, the little girl finally turned her face to Jenny. Jenny felt a shiver run up her neck as she looked into the pale, unemotional eyes. The little girl's mouth opened slowly and she began to sing in an airy, haunting voice.
"One, Two, we've been waiting for you,
Three, Four, we've opened the door
Five, Six, better watch out for Nyx,
Seven, Eight, will you meet your fate?
Nine, Ten, let us play again."
Jenny went as rigid as a poker and her breath caught in her throat as she stared at the child. She suddenly didn't feel so inclined to help the child at all and wanted nothing more than to flee from her, yet she couldn't seem to make her feet move.
Goku shook his arm free from Lindsey and headed for the stairs, the others falling into step behind him. He only paused when he was right beside the child. "Thank you," he said kindly to her as he passed.
She stared up at him without blinking.
Jenny finally found herself able to move when Piccolo grabbed her hand and walked up the rest of the stairs with him. Lindsey made sure to position Trunks, Catie and Gohan between herself and the ghost-like child. She held her left hand up like a blinder and stared at the floor, muttering, "Don't look at it, don't look at it, don't look at it…"
They entered the cavernous foyer that was lit by rustic torches hanging on the walls. Warily, they walked forward, carefully testing the atmosphere, looking for energy signals that might tell them what they were up against. But it was to no avail. There simply wasn't anyone strong enough to send up any red flags for them. The doors behind them closed with a slam, making them jump and look over their shoulders. The little girl strode forward, eyes staring straight ahead, her face expressionless, dragging her raggedy teddy bear, singing once again.
"One, Two, you'll get what's coming to you
Three, Four, and maybe a little more
Five, Six, look in our bag of tricks
Seven, Eight, you don't have to wait
Nine, Ten, 'tis the beginning of the end!"
By the time she'd stopped singing, she'd passed the Z-fighters and reached the end of the large corridor, grabbed the ring-shaped doorknob, and slowly pulled the door open for them.
"Now she's starting to freak me out," Seventeen murmured.
The room she led them to was dark and silent. Once again, the door behind them closed with an echoing boom. This time, however, the little girl did not follow, but they could hear her eerie giggling from the other side of the door.
"Now what?" Catie whispered into the pitch blackness.
A soft light began to glow in the room, illuminating their surroundings. The walls of the circular room held several doors, each inscribed with strange markings. The center of the floor was painted in a huge black and white spiral that stretched to the walls.
"Follow the yellow brick road," Leelee said softly, looking at the floor.
Catie threw her a dirty look. "If we see munchkins, I swear, I will scream."
Trunks cocked an eyebrow at her, but said nothing. He was too busy trying to choose a door for them to go through. Who knew what was lying behind each one? He couldn't feel a particularly strong energy behind any of the doors. But there were definitely energies there. And that made him nervous.
The soft t-tishh t-tishh t-tishh of a drumstick against metal broke the silence and burlesque music began to play.
"What's going on?" Goku wondered aloud.
"Welcome," said a high, sickly sweet voice.
They glanced around the empty room, looking for the source of the voice.
"Oh, Kami, not again," Vegeta groaned. He'd nearly been driven mad the last time they'd come into this castle, arguing with a disembodied voice, trying to figure out who they were dealing with.
A figure faded into view in the middle of the spiral floor, her back to the group of fighters who immediately dropped into defensive positions.
"Face us," Jenny commanded.
The figure pivoted on her tall high-heeled boots, one hand on her hip, and grinned widely at them. Her vibrant purple hair was pulled up into high pigtails, which were done up in tangled, messy buns. A tiny top hat was perched to the left side of her head. She wore a light purple, sequined corset that pinched her waist and ruffled purple boy shorts. Her long legs were clad in silver fishnets, the right leg sporting a pink and white striped stocking hooked to a garter belt. She grinned wickedly at them, her teeth gleaming white behind her dark purple lipstick. A thin, elongated heart was painted on her right cheek, stretching from her eye to her jaw.
Without a word, Vegeta fired an energy blast at the strangely pretty young woman.
"Vegeta!" Goku scolded.
The girl caught the orb one-handed, and stared curiously at it as it dissolved in her palm. Then she looked at them again, grinning wider. She pranced quickly up to Vegeta and stood nearly nose-to-nose with him, the burlesque music growing louder. "Hey fella, can I talk to you for a second? What's the harm in a little talk?"
Vegeta gaped at her, but before he could respond, she'd flitted over to Goku. "Hey, good-lookin', I like your hair," she purred, running her fingers through it and trailing a long, lavender fingernail down his jaw. Goku blushed in spite of himself.
She spun several times, until she was chest-to-chest with Lindsey, wrapping her slender arm around the redhead's waist and sliding her other hand into Lindsey's pocket. "Hey, missy, got a cigarette for me? Huh?" she asked, withdrawing the surprisingly dry pack from Lindsey's wet jeans. She quickly popped one in her mouth and, without lighting it, drew on the cigarette and exhaled a stream of smoke in Lindsey's face. Gohan looked murderous.
"Hey monsieur," she cooed at Trunks, shoving Lindsey harshly away and rushing up to him. "Do you speak French? Parle vous francais?"
She twirled away from him, dropping the cigarette, and grabbed Seventeen's wet shirt, pulling him to her. "Hey cowboy, you wanna dance?" she asked, her violet lips tantalizingly close to his. "A little dance won't hurt ya."
Leelee scowled behind the long, wet braids of her hair that had fallen into her eyes.
The girl arched back, catching herself with her hands, and flipped slowly over, her long legs extending into the air and landing lightly on the floor. She straightened and pressed the fingertips of one hand to her chest. "I'm Nyx," she smiled.
She tiptoed quickly up to Piccolo. "Oooooo! You're sooo tall," she squealed. She grinned dangerously at Gohan. "Let's have some fun," she winked.
"The minute you walked in the joint,
I could see you were a man of distinction,
A real big spender.
Good lookin', so refined,
Say wouldn't you like to know
What's goin' on in my mind?
So let me get right to the point
I don't pop my cork for every guy I seeeeee,
Hey big spender!
Spend a little time with me!"
Her singing voice was much bigger than the voice she'd used to speak to them and didn't fit her tiny stature at all. The Z-Fighters looked at each other in confusion, trying to figure out what was going on. They'd been attacked by enemies before, been tricked, abducted, even had foes monolog, but had never, not once, had one sing to them and flirt the way she was.
"The hell is this, a musical?" Vegeta growled.
Nyx acted as though she didn't hear him and continued to croon in her big, sultry voice.
"Do you wanna have fun? Fun?
How's about a few laughs? Laughs?
I could show you a good time!
Do you wanna have fun? Fun? Fun?
How's about a few laughs? Laughs?
I could show you a good time!
Hey big spender!
Hey big spender!
Spennnd a little time with me!"
She leaned heavily on one leg, once again standing in the middle of the spiral, her other leg bent at the knee, both hands on her hips, and smiled, "How's about it, boys?" as the music faded and turned to a new song that continued to play softly in the background.
"Yeah, how's about no?" Gohan answered.
"Where's my baby?!" Jenny screamed, losing her patience with the young woman who simply smiled at them.
Nyx tsked at them. "Now don't be rude. We have a whole play-date planned for you."
"We're not interested," Piccolo said, crossing his arms across his chest. "We're just here to get my daughter back."
Nyx continued to smile, but her eyes narrowed. "Very well, then. Let the child be the prize at the end of our games. Make it through the challenges we present, and you shall have her."
"And if we lose?" Goku asked in a serious tone.
She shrugged her thin shoulder slightly. "You work for us for eternity."
A door to Nyx's right creaked open and a young man strolled through. He had the same pale skin as Nyx, but was taller than she was, and his spiky hair was an electric blue. He wore black pinstripe trousers held up by black suspenders over his bare chest. He had the long, lean muscles of a dancer, unlike the big, bulky muscles of the Z-Fighters. A black bowler hat was tipped to the side of his head and his feet were adorned with highly polished black and white saddleback dress shoes. He carried a turtle in his hand.
"Who's a good wittle turtle?" he cooed to it, holding it up to eye-level.
Nyx sighed and her shoulders slumped. "You're ruining it."
He blinked in surprise and looked up at her. "Huh? Ruining what?"
She gave a sweeping motion to her small audience. "This."
He looked around at the Z-Fighters. "Oh! Hello!"
"What are you doing with that disgusting creature?" she asked, wrinkling her nose.
"I got to playing with it and forgot I wanted to eat it," he said, looking at the turtle once more.
"Playing? Turtles don't play well."
"Sure they do!" he insisted, his eyes alight with the playfulness of a child. "Just turn 'em on their back and give 'em a good spin!" He suddenly flipped the turtle over and spun it, balancing the poor thing on the tip of his finger.
Nyx rubbed her forehead. "Loki, get out of here. You're absolutely useless."
He caught the turtle and pulled it close. "Fine. Come on, Turtle. She just doesn't understand." He stuck his nose in the air and headed back for the door. Just as he reached it, he turned back to her and shouted, "By the way, you're late for tea!" then slammed the door shut behind him.
Returning her attention back to the Z-Fighters, she gave a forced smile. "I wouldn't start out with that door if I were you."
They were all feeling rather bewildered at the turn of events. Were these people really this indifferent about the situation or were they putting on an act?
"Well now," Nyx said thoughtfully. "We can't have you running around in those wet clothes. Hmm." She threw her hands out in front of her, releasing a wave of bright purple light.
They braced themselves for an impact that never came. Instead, they suddenly found themselves warm and dry. Opening their eyes, they looked at one another in shock.
"Ridiculous!" Vegeta shouted, looking down at his new clothing. He wore black dress pants and shoes with a black vest and tie.
"Much better," Nyx grinned, obviously pleased with herself.
"I hate corsets!" Jenny shrieked, pulling at the painfully tight blue fabric.
"Oooo, pretty," Sabriena cooed, looking down at her metallic gold corset and matching high-heeled boots.
"Are you serious?!" Jenny rounded on her. "You're happy about this?"
"Hey! I'm finally dry!" Sabriena shot back. "And this thing makes my boobs look amazing."
"Nice eyeliner, Gohan," Seventeen smirked.
Gohan went red in the face. "You're wearing it too, ya know."
"I figured as much. But I make this shit look good," Seventeen replied.
They were all dressed in similar burlesque fashion, the girls in brightly colored corsets and boots with short skirts or ruffled bloomers. The men wore clothing like that of Loki; highly polished dress shoes and ironed trousers, held up by suspenders or with matching vests. Most of them looked rather displeased.
"Choose your door wisely," Nyx advised. "Should you make it through the challenge, you will move on to the next challenge. Complete the game and you shall have your prize. Fail, and you will spend an eternity in servitude to her greatness, Queen Sigourney. This is your last chance to turn back. Once the game begins, there is no quitting." She bowed deeply to them, then skipped across the room to the door Loki had exited through. "Good luck," she called back hauntingly to them, then without opening the door, stepped right through it and disappeared.
Author's note: "Big Spender" lyrics belong to Sweet Charity and Bob Fosse.