Part Ten
A Time to Give Up As Lost
The sobbing was muffled, but Edmund was sure he had heard it. He walked back past Lucy's door and pressed his ear up against the cool wood. She was crying into her pillow. Again.
He set the glass of water he had been carrying outside the door and gently tapped.
"Who is it?" Lucy whispered.
"Edmund," He whispered back. When she said nothing else, Edmund knew it was her way of saying it was all right for him to enter.
The room was darker than the hallway and it took a few minutes for his eyes to adjust to the lack of moonlight. His room had several large windows, all facing outside, but Lucy's only had one. Once he could see, he made his way to the edge of Lucy's bed. Both her cheeks and her eyes were red.
Edmund threw one of his arms around her, drawing her close to his chest. He hated seeing his little sister, always so full of light, like this.
"Come on, Lu. Is this the third night in a row?" He asked softly.
"Fourth," she admitted.
"You've been sad an awful lot lately. Is it Narnia? I know we both miss it and Aslan, but. . ." Edmund trailed off as Lucy shook her head violently.
"It's not that, Ed. I mean, I miss Narnia, and Aslan, and I can't believe we're not going back. But Aslan said we could find Him in this world, and I trust Him. It's Susan."
"Susan?" Edmund couldn't keep the shock out of his voice. He knew Lucy was taking Susan's denial of both Narnia and family hard, but they all were. He didn't think it would cause her to cry so violently.
Lucy sobbed, unable to keep the tears from coming back.
"You and Peter are the best brothers I could have," Lucy admitted, "but Susan is my sister, and I feel like we've completely lost here. Every time I try to bring her back she pulls away even more."
"Oh, Lu," Edmund consoled her, "Susan's life is her own. We can't keep her tied to a Narnia she doesn't believe in if she doesn't want to be tied. I think she'll come back someday, I do, but right now, you have to let her go. I know it's hard, but it's what we have to do. Let her go, Lu."