Disclaimer: I don't own diddly.

(So, our superstars have now arrived in Miami, Evolution had a little fun with the nightlife, Rob and Lita are lagging behind due to the "smoke break" earlier--hehehe, Tazz and Show barhopped a little, as well as Spike and Albert--but Albert got himself and Spike booted out of the club. To make a long story short, Spike was at the bar and a BEAUTIFUL young woman approached him and they started talking. Well, one thing led to another and Spike was on his way back to the hotel with this woman. Little did Spike know, however, that this woman had an ex-boyfriend who didn't really believe that the relationship was over. So, he confronted Spike and was about to rip into him when Albert intercepted the guy and Baldo-Bombed him through the bar counter. The bouncers, about 9 strong "gently" escorted Spike and Albert out of the bar and "politely" told them to have a nice day. (hehehe), so with all that said, we'll now rejoin Evolution, the morning after)

(H's alarm clock goes off, it's 7 am...)

HHH hits the "off" button, and yawns as he walks over to his mirror and poses briefly. He says to himself, "Damn...now I'D pay to see ME in action, ha! I'll just hop in the shower and gather the guys so we can be on the road quickly."

(Meanwhile, in another room, we find Flair with his two companions. Everyone is sprawled out, empty vodka bottles and torn panty-hose are strewn all over the floor...)

Flair, who's just coming to and holding his forehead, says, "Ohhhh...my head!" ( He looks over next to himself at the woman laying beside him...) "AAAHHH!"

Mae looks over and yells, "AAAAGH!"

Moolah looks at Mae and Ric and yells, "AAAAUUUGH!"

(All three just look at each other screaming...)

Flair comes to a sobering realization and asks, "I-I...didn't. Did I?"

(Moolah and Mae just look at each other and then back at Flair nodding slowly...)

Flair's eyes widen and he says, "Oh my GOD!" He checks his watch and says, "I gotta get outta' here!"

Mae asks, "But what about the fun we had last night? You said you LOVED my bloodhounds!"

Flair, stupefied, asks, "I said WHAT?"

Moolah adds, "Yeah, you buried your face all in her chest last night in your, uh, drunken rage."

(Flair just looked dumbfounded at Mae, who at this point, was blushing like a schoolgirl with a crush.)

Flair asks, "A-are you...SERIOUS?"

Mae nods, "Yup, you were having soooo much fun just rubbing your face in between my, as you called them, my 'floppy, mis-shapen, fun jugs'!"

(Flair just looked at himself up and down as he tried to register all of these things and...)

Flair looks himself up and down and asks, "What the hell!? What am I doing in-in a LEATHER CORSET, A-A-A FRIGGIN' DOG COLLAR AND...HIGH-HEELS?"

Mae explains, "Well, you let me put them on you last night."

(Flair then just inhaled deeply and mustered what was left of his dignity and headed for the bathroom to shower and everything else. Meanwhile, in the lobby...)

HHH looks at his watch annoyed and asks, "Dammit, where's Flair?"

Batista shrugs, "I haven't seen him since before we went to the club last night."

Cowboy Bob III, shaking his head a little while smiling a bit, says, "Well, I-I, uh, ran into him last night."

HHH asks, "Where?"

Cowboy Bob III points upstairs and says, "Outside his room. Y'know, champ, I think I understand why he's running a little late."

HHH asks, "Well, why's that?"

Cowboy Bob III raises his eyebrows and begins, "Well, when I ran into him, he was—"

Suddenly from off in the distance, Flair yells, "GUYS, WAIT UP!"

HHH asks, "What took you so long?"

Flair, glancing at Orton, says, "I, uh kinda woke up a little late, champ. Sorry 'bout that."

HHH nods, "Cool, then. Well, that's everybody then, let's roll.

(Randy and Flair exchange glances quietly as Evolution head out the door)

(So now we'll join up with Rob and Lita, who have smartly decided to wake up at 5 am and just hit the road...)

Lita smiles and says, "Ok, we just hit Miami, Rob!"

RVD, who's asleep peacefully, "zzzzzzz…"

"Rob?"

"zzzzzzzz…"

Lita leans over to Rob's ear and yells, "ROB!"

(Rob jumps a little...)

RVD groggily answers, "Dude, WHAT?"

Lita answers, "We just hit Miami, we're almost there!"

RVD, going back to sleep, says, "Cool, lemme' know when we're there."

(Rob tries to go back to sleep, but Lita...)

Lita punches him in his shoulder and says, "No you don't, you're not gonna' have ME do all the driving and you just SLEEP for the rest of the trip! So you might as well just wake up and STAY up!"

RVD groggily relents, "Alriiight, alright, geez man!"

Lita says, "Alright, now pull out the map."

RVD rubs his eyes and says, "Ok, it says here that we're supposed to keep going straight a few miles yet."

Lita asks, "A FEW miles?"

"Yep."

Lita sighs, "Alright, then."

(We'll leave Rob and Lita alone for a while as they play catch-up. We'll go see Tazz and Show, as they've just finished having breakfast)

Tazz pulls out the map. He says, "Ok Show, it says that this place should be a few miles from here just off this stretch."

Show says, "Ok, cool. Let's roll, then."

(So Tazz and Show get in Show's hand-car and head on down the road when...)

Tazz frowns a little and asks, "Hey Show, what's that rumblin' noise?"

"What're you talking about?"

Tazz says, "No, no, listen..."

(Show turns off the radio and rolls down the window to get a good listen)

Show says, "Yeah, I hear it too. What IS that, anyway?"

Tazz sees the "check engine" light come on. He says, "Uh oh, betta' pull over."

(Show pulls over and puts the vehicle in park. As he does this, the vibration gets worse...)

Tazz yells, "Whoa!"

Show sighs, pops the hood and gets out of the car. He looks under the hood and says, "Damn, looks like the engine's smoking!"

Tazz asks, "What'll we do now? I can't fix it."

"Well, I guess we can hitch a ride?"

Tazz says, "Well, we're near a Taco Bell. Wanna' go, maybe call someone from there?"

"Cool."

(So Show and Tazz go down the street into the Taco Bell restaurant...)

The counter clerk says, "Hello, welcome to Taco Bell. My name's Jose. How may I help you?"

Show asks, "Uhh, yeah can I use the phone?"

The clerk answers, "Oh, uhh--you'd have to talk to our manager about that."

Tazz asks, "How come?"

the clerk says, "Well, he's very funny and particular about who can and cannot use the phone. You see this guy just got hired like, a couple weeks ago and he's not one for 'new' ideas, like letting the public use the phone, or having a phone out in the lobby. Oh, he also kicks out any gay customers. He says men who dress like women don't deserve to eat his food, or some shit like that."

(Tazz and Show just look at each other...)

Tazz raises an eyebrow and says, "He, uh, sounds like an interesting guy."

Show asks, "Well, where's he at?"

"Well, he's in the back somewhere--probably whacking off again. I'll go get'm, hang on."

(So Tazz and Show wait patiently until the manager comes out and...)

Show and Tazz immediately recognize the manager. They point and say, "YOU!"

Show asks, "THIS is where you went?"

Tazz adds, "WOW, so you run a Taco bell now, eh?"

Chavo Classic says, "Yeah, yeah, yeah I know. I hear about it everyday from my wife. I couldn't get a job anywhere else. Everyone wanted me to put on a dress, for some reason. EVEN McDonald's!! This is the ONLY place I can find that'll give me some semblance of creative control!--EVEN IF it's only the menu, cholo!"

Show furrows his brow and says, "--The fuck? You have 'creative control' over the menu?"

Chavo Classic nods, "That's right, senor. In fact, I'm coming out with a new taco called "Chavo's Classic"! And It'll feature an all-new homemade recipe of Chavo's classic sauce!"

Tazz glances at Show and asks Chavo, "Whaddya' mean 'Chavo's classic sauce'?"

Chavo Classic shrugs, "Well, It's seemple. Customer orders my taco, and I go to my office, pull out a porno mag and then, a few meenutes later, I produce my special sauce all over their taco! MWAAHAHAHAHAAAA!"

(Tazz and Show just look at each other and cringe)

Show says, "Uh...ok. haha--hey, uhh, can I use your phone?"

Chavo Classic replies, "Sure senor, It'll be 50 cents, though."

Show sighs, and then hands Classic 50 cents. He says, "Hey Tazz, you remember Test's number?"

Tazz says, "Test? I didn't know he was nearby?"

Show nods, "Yeah, he lives about 20 minutes from here."

Tazz says, "Oh, cool. Yeah his number is 555-8102."

(Show dials the number and Test picks up...)

Show says, "Hey Test, how's it goin'?"

Show says, "Me? Well, that's the reason I'm callin', man. Me and Tazz are stranded at Taco bell—"

Show smiles, "Yeah, THAT one!"

Show asks, "Oh, so you know where it is, then? Ok Cool. we'll be here, thanks!"

(So Show hangs up the phone and hands it back to Chavo Classic)

Show turns to Tazz and says, "Ok Tazz, we got a few minutes t'kill, let's go back by the car."

(So as Show and Tazz make their way back to Show's broken-down hand-car still smoking beside the road, we rejoin Spike and Albert, as they are totally lost.)

Albert pounds the dashboard in frustration and says, "DAMMIT, why the hell can't I find this joint?"

Spike says, "Well, according to the map, it's supposed to be around this area."

Albert retorts, "I've circled this block four fuckin' times! It ain't here!"

Spike gingerly says, "Well, maybe we should ask for directions, then?"

Albert loudly says, "Hey Spike, I just had a BRILLIANT idea!"

"What's that?"

Albert smiles and says, "We'll just ask for directions!"

(Spike just sighs and glances upward)

(Albert finds a 7-11 and walks inside...)

Albert, looking around, asks, "Why ain't there nobody at the counter?"

Spike shrugs, "Maybe we should just wait here—"

Albert cuts him off, "--BULLSHIT! We ain't waitin' on nobody! HELLO, YOU GOT CUSTOMERS OUT HERE! HELLOO!"

A voice from the back answers, "Alright, alright, I hear you, just gimme' a minute!"

(Albert glances at Spike)

The clerk comes out wiping his hands as he approaches the counter. He says, "Ok sir, how may I hel--HEY, don't I know you two?"

(Albert and Spike glance at each other, then at the clerk and...)

Albert, trying to recognize the clerk, says, "I think I DO know you. You look familiar."

Spike adds, "Yeah, you DO look familiar. HEY, I know EXACTLY who you are! You're—"

Then Albert and Spike say in unison, "TIGER ALI SINGH!"

Tiger smiles and asks, "Yeah, what brings you two down this way?"

Albert says, "Well, Vince sent us down here on this retarded-assed mission to—"

Tiger interrupts, "Wait, don't tell me he's STILL doing the beer and porn runs!? Hahaha, man he never quits, does he?"

Albert shrugs, "Nope, apparently not. So you work here now?"

Tiger nods and says, "Well, sort of. I run a string of 7-11's, er, five of them, this, of course being one of them!"

Spike raises an eyebrow and says, "Hmm, well you're faring better than some of the people we've come across!"

Tiger asks, "Oh?"

Albert says, "Yeah, you remember, uh, Bagwell and Schiavone?"

Tiger strokes his chin and says, "Hmm, I definitely remember Bags, but Schiavone--Oh was he that annoying fat guy that used to announce for Nitro?"

Albert nods, "Yup, the very same."

Tiger says, "Yeah, well what happened to them?"

Albert smirks, "They both work at a KFC up in North Carolina. And, get THIS, they're both self-proclaimed career men with KFC! Do you BELIEVE that shit!? OH, oh, and Bags had this lame-assed slogan--what was it? --oh yeah, it was 'KFC is the ONNNNLY way to be'. Tiger, ever since I heard that, I-I just couldn't stop laughing!"

(All three men just bust out laughing)

Spike, starting to calm a little, asks, "Hey, Tiger, reason we came by is that we were wondering if you knew the way to this special shop that Vince is talkin' about?"

Tiger nods, "Oh yeah, that joint? Well, you leave here and hang a right. Then you..."

(So while Albert and Spike are getting directions, let's join up with Show and Tazz again as Test is just pulling up...)

Show points, "Hey Tazz, here comes Test!"

Tazz looks at Test's "car". He says, "Yeah, figures that'd be him."

(Test pulls up in a big black wrestling boot with wheels on the bottom. It looks like a giant wrestling boot roller-skate)

Show says, "Hey man, thanks for pickin' us up on such short notice."

Tazz adds, "Yeah man. We're on the beer and porn run, y'know?"

Test furrows his brow and says, "Huh, no one even TOLD me about it! I gotta' call Vince and find out what's up later on. So, you two know where this place is?"

Tazz says, "Well, according to the map, it's supposed to be just off this here stretch a few miles up the road."

Test nods and says, "Ok, hop in, we'll be there in no time. But, uuh, Show?"

Show asks, "Wassup' man?"

"Before I take you two, I want in on the prize if we win."

"Ok with me, how 'bout you, Tazz?"

"Cool with me, brotha', let's go."

(So Show, Tazz, and now Test, head on up the road to where this place is supposed to be. And, so this ends another chapter.)

So, will Flair's "freaky-deeky" side catch up with him? Will RVD and Lita EVER catch up to everybody else? How will the road crew tow away Big Show's hand-car? How long will Chavo Classic continue to get away with feeding customers his "special sauce"? Who'd of thought that, the human heat vacuum himself, Tiger Ali-Singh, would be running a 7-11 in Miami? (hehehe) Will Flair choose to reminisce about Mae Young's "bloodhounds", then again, will YOU, the reader? (NOW try eating tonight, ahehehe!) And, most importantly, will Vince get his porn before the effects of his Viagra wear off? These, and all other absurd questions will be answered when you tune in next time--Same Warrior time, same Warrior place, same Warrior channel!

Please review, thanks!