A/N: Hey everyone, I'm sorry for the long wait for this update! I've just had major writer's block. I'll try to work on the next chapter this week, but I can't promise it'll be out. I am going to be in Portland next week, so no updates. I really do appreciate all of your love and support for this story, and as Shonda always says TRUST THE JOURNEY.

When people get angry they do things they end up regretting, for example, Jackson was angry at his ex-wife for leaving him to go to Jordan and so he reacted by filing for divorce. Did he really want a divorce? No. But was it the only option that satisfied his pride? Yes. He had been left too many times before in his life to let her do the same and get away with it. It hurt him so much to call that lawyer's office and have them draft up the divorce settlement. April had argued her whole way through, not over money or property, but over love itself. But he had ignored her every plea for reconciliation. He had trusted her, deeply, more than he had ever trusted anyone. But she abandoned him for the battlefield, and then she left again. He was her husband, why wasn't he enough for her? He never had to question his self-worth, but less than two years being married to her, he had doubted it had ever existed in the first place.

He's been angry with April before, but not ever more than this moment. And he doesn't know if he should be angry with her or himself. He just remembers digging his nails into his palms, trying to hold himself back from kissing his wife, because that's what she is. Interrupting her and whomever she was with, grabbing her by the small of her back, and telling her that he's sorry that he loves her that he wants her to come home with the simple gesture of touching his lips to hers. She's his wife; he's never stopped looking at her that way and he feels like a damned fool for not telling her so. Why'd he have to go to that lawyer's office? Why couldn't he swallow his pride and be a good man in a storm. They were just going through a storm, they were April and Jackson, they could have gotten through anything. But, instead, he chose to abandon ship and sail on his own. It was the only way to guarantee he wouldn't get hurt again, or so he though.

So, he did the only thing he knew how to do, nothing. He wasn't ready to speak to her, to hash out everything that he had just seen, because if he was being truly honest with himself, she didn't need to explain herself. They were divorced, she had every right to move on, but it didn't stop it from stinging. He didn't know seeing April Kepner kissing another man, a sight he'd seen many times before, would create such a burning anger inside of him. This wasn't just a simple peck on the cheek; this was a real kiss, one filled with passion and desire. She's really moved on.

He brushed past a shocked April as swiftly as he could, trying desperately not to make eye contact with her. He knew she'd want to talk, and eventually he'd have to cave in to that request, but right now all he wants to do is see his daughter. The daughter he hasn't been able to hold in weeks. He wants to smell the top of her head and hold her in his arms and whisper in her ear that everything's going to be okay, even if he doesn't believe that himself. He's her rock and her confidant and he's been missing. In Seattle everyone thinks he's walking around with a storm cloud around him because April isn't there, while that's true, he misses his girl Harriet a bit more.

"Hi," he awkwardly greets the daycare attendant, "I'm Dr. Avery, and Harriet is my daughter."

"ID please," she coldly replied. He handed her his driver's license and within a few moments she left her desk to go and grab Harriet.

He hadn't seen his baby girl in a few weeks and to most people that isn't a long time. But imagine, not seeing your child for that long. Not knowing exactly what they had for dinner or what outfit they had on that day; the small things become big things. And God, did he miss her. She was like his second skin. He had never imagined that he would have children. It had never been apart of his life plan. But then April got pregnant with Samuel and suddenly he couldn't imagine himself without a child. But then, instead of bringing one home, they buried him. He's set in a nice plot, surrounded by people he doesn't know, but eventually him and April will be there. They agreed, despite whatever differences they may face, they will always be there for their son. A part of him is glad that the agreed upon that, but would he really be happy with April's new husband spending the rest of eternity next to her too?

But there something with Harriet, she was unexpected, a complete and utter surprise. Harriet was everything he had ever imagined wanting. He didn't grow up thinking he'd want children; people to pass on his family name. No, he never thought like that. He thought about the type of medicine he'd study or the girls he would have in his room, or the friends that he played football with but never ever did he imagine having a child. But they say you can imagine having children until you meet the person you're supposed to have children with. And throughout his residency he didn't see April that way. She was perky, energetic .one to follow every rule even when logic would tell you, you shouldn't. But as time went on, he used to see her little corks as annoying but they developed into something beautiful something that he couldn't imagine not hearing or seeing; something that if they weren't in his life it wouldn't be complete. And so his mind started to wander just a little bit into the realm of possibility that he and April Kepner could be something more than friends. She had confessed to him that long ago Mark Sloan, his old Mentor and confidant, had suggested to her that they embarked in a sexual back on it now, he couldn't help but laugh at the irony that Mark Sloan had told him that if you love someone you tell them. Maybe he had seen what he and April were too blind to see.

At this time April was a virgin, another man had never touched her. Another man had never licked in places that would make any woman tingle, her never felt the skin on her inner thighs, never once kissed her lips in such sweet solidarity. He, as cocky as it sounds, is the only man to ever touch her in the way that only God, your husband, and death could. He remembers that night fondly. The night where she sprung up on Kyle and punched him square in the nose. He was shocked originally he never expected that out of April Kepner. And so when she kissed him, he wasn't mad he wasn't upset some could argue that he may have been taken aback but he wasn't. April was his best friends and he worried that if he had thought of her as something more if he had crushed on her if he had it if he had expelled his sexual tension on her then maybe his one true friend wood finish. So when she made the first move when she pressed her lips against his and wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him in closer this was fate the only thing that couldn't could explain it with site itself. They were best friends people who 10 inch everything but then one day she grabbed him by the neck pulled his lips to has and suddenly they were more than friends he was a Fest and although it's a little bit cocky he's been her only. But now thinking back thought he never really thought it was super important to be her only. But now looking at her and whomever she was kissing, he wouldn't bother learning his name; for once in his life he realized that it was actually important. He loves, love's April Kepner, and thought of anyone else doing the same, reeks havoc through his mind.

"Dada," Harriet interrupted his train of thought.

"I'm here baby, I'm here," he cooed to his daughter. He looked into her hazel eyes, a trait she inherited from April, and they were the same eyes as her mother. Normally April would've been discouraged that they were her eyes instead of his, but he had a secret of his own, he found hers much more beautiful. Her's were mysterious. Unlike his, which told every secret he had ever wished to keep, they were mundane. In a beautiful way, in aw ay where no one, not even those who knew her to her core, would know what she was thinking. Unfortunately, his eyes gave him away, if they glimmered a little less blue that indicated sadness, a bit more green and it showed rage. Anyone who knew him well knew they didn't need to learn him or his body's movements, but the tone of his eyes, for they would tell them everything that they yearned to know.

"Up," she cooed, he had never heard her say up before and he didn't know whether to be sad or proud. His daughter was growing, but she was growing without him and with a new man in her life.

"Is mommy seeing the big, strapping man?" He exaggerated the strapping, only to be reciprocated by a confused look from Harriet. Of course she didn't know, she was only a baby. Not a baby, but a toddler, who was not equipped to judge and value her parents' relationship statuses.

Harriet didn't respond, she just spit up slightly on her onesie. A sign, Jackson took, as a yes. He wasn't blind. He knew April was seeing, whomever she had sucked face with, outside the daycare center. The man whose muscles rivaled his, whose skin was clear of imperfections, who looked like he went to church every Sunday and actually knew what the sermons meant. He had gone with April a few times to humor her when Harriet was younger. Once for her baptism, and once a week before to understand how church went so he wouldn't embarrass himself at the ceremony. He had disliked every second of it and didn't make his complaints silently, now looking back he wished that he had. The man she was kissing, looked like everything April had ever told him that she wanted. A young man, with strapping good looks, a strong sense of family, but even a stronger sense of faith; and although Jackson hadn't uttered a single word to him, deep in his core he knew that Bright was a man of faith. Because, why on earth would April be performing the tongue twist with someone who didn't believe what she did. Jackson Avery was an intelligent man, so much so that his mother rested the fate of the Avery foundation on his shoulders, so he should be able to tell if April Kepner was kissing someone out of lust and someone out of pleasure. And whomever's hair she was grasping between her fingers was a man of faith, a man she could see as her husband, and God that stung more than lemon on a fresh cut. Because this was real and Jackson wasn't quite ready to step into reality. He was much too preoccupied with the ooing and aahing of his daughter, to pay attention to whatever ideas he had about April and the sandy blonde guy she was sucking face with in the first place.

He knew April Kepner, and she wasn't one to travel with her tongue. She was one to keep it in a safe place, and only those she trusted had exclusive access to it. So, logic told him that she wouldn't just make out, especially at her place of work, with just anybody. No, this was serious. And he couldn't stop obsessing over it, even while he took his daughter outside of the hospital and into the city streets of Chicago. He couldn't help but let his mind wander to the fact that maybe him and April were over for good and it was her who had made that decision.

April stood a few feet outside the nursery, still unable to comprehend what had just happened. She had seen Jackson, her ex-husband, former love of her life. But he had caught her and Bright together. She didn't want him to find out this way. She knew he'd be angry and she couldn't blame him for being hurt, the sheer thought of him and Maggie together made her up and move across the country, but she'd never tell him that.

"April, where's the little bug? I wanted to meet her daddy before I left," Amelia interrupted her train of thought.

"Oh, he took her for the evening," April coyly responded.

However, Amelia wasn't buying it and replied, "What happened?"

"I don't want to get into it."

"April," she protested, "If you don't talk about it, it's only going to fester."

April knew Amelia was right, as much as she hated to admit it, so she took a deep breath before responding, "He caught us."

"Us?" Amelia questioned, "Us, as in you and Bright?"

"Yes," April admitted, "I didn't want him to find out this way."

"Well he did," Amelia, replied bluntly, "So what are you going to do about it?"

"Hide under a rock until I rot."

The two women were now walking towards their cars, Amelia had gotten Alyssa who was going to have a sleepover at aunt Cassandra's, while April, Bright, Eric, and her were going to get drinks at Joe's. April had checked her phone before Amelia came over, Jackson texted her to meet at his hotel room by ten to get Harriet, at least wasn't too pissed to do that.

"April Kepner," Amelia stopped in her tracks and faced April grabbing her by the shoulders and practically touching her nose to hers, "You are a divorced woman, and do you hear me? You do not need to feel bad for fixing what he broke."

"Then why do I?" She argued back. Why did she feel bad for being with Bright? They hadn't had sex yet, and surely wouldn't for a great while, maybe not even until they're married. She hadn't broken any vows she had made to God and Jackson, but something inside of her felt wrong for being with Bright. For entertaining the idea that another man could light the fire under her that Jackson once did.

"I'd argue, that a little bit of you still loves him."

April realized, that Amelia sounded a lot like Reed, her friend from residency who died when a gunman took hold of the hospital. It was the worst day of her life, but without it, she and Jackson may have never become as good of friends, and thus husband and wife. As with most things in life, they are simultaneously a blessing and a curse.

"He's my husband," April responded as she grabbed the handle of Amelia's car door.

"Was, your husband," Amelia corrected, but April didn't reply. She just looked straight out the passenger side of the car and gazed at the stars.

"You know, I grew up on a farm?"

"Yeah?" Amelia, answered confused as to where the redhead was going with this conversation.

"Every night, I'd go on the balcony that my dad had built, you could only access it through my room. And I'd go out and look at the stars. For hours, I'd just sit there and look at them. Their vast beauty was always mesmerizing to me. Here, you don't see them. The smog of the city covers them. They're the one benefit of the country, the one thing that I miss the most from home. Jackson is like that for me. The love we have for each other is like the stars, right now I can't see it, but I know it's there. It will always be there."

"Then tell him that," Amelia urged, "If he was that upset with you kissing Bright than you know he feels the same way. What do you have to lose?"

April sighed and responded, "Everything."

The bar was loud, much louder than Joe's, and it played terrible EDM music. However, April wasn't one to complain and she knew it had been Eric's choice, not Amelia's. It seemed like the type of place he'd hang out in. One where you're more likely to get too drunk to hold a decent conversation, even if you could hear yourself think.

"Ladies," he exclaimed, "took you long enough."

"Sorry babe," Amelia greeted him with a kiss, "We had a bit of an emergency."

Eric glanced over at April, who was now wrapped in Bright's arms, "Kepner, what made my wife so late?"

"Don't worry about it," she replied, "First round on me?"

"It'll be his second," Bright added.

"Shush, man. They're not supposed to know that."

"Oh trust me," Amelia laughed placing her hand on his chest, "We already knew."

"I'll take a scotch, Kepner," he instructed, "And milady will take a gin and tonic."

"Coming right up," April replied.

April and Bright made their way to the bar, he could tell there was something off about her. She normally was cheery, but to be honest, she was being a bit creepy right now. He knew she was apprehensive about Jackson vesting, she had told him so. But she had refused to elaborate on it further. He wasn't jealous of her ex coming to town, why would he be? He was Harriet's father and so he was going to be involved in her life and in April's life. It made no sense for him to be jealous of something he'd never be able to change. So, he prayed about it, asked his brother what he did when faced with the same situation. His brother had been divorced for eight years and his wife has been remarried for four. Everything told him to just be kind. Don't threaten the ex, give the ex space, don't be jealous. Be calm. It was a lot easier said than done, but his relationship with April was still new, he didn't want to scare her away because he couldn't handle her ex-husband coming to visit their daughter.

"How was it?" He asked, as April was grabbing her whiskey coke and Amelia's gin and tonic. He grabbed Eric's scotch as well as his own.

She took a big gulp of her drink, before looking at him, "Terrible."

He stared into her hazel eyes, eyes that are normally so beautiful and full of light, but now they ring with sadness, "What happened?"

"He saw us."

Bright didn't know what to say. Why would she be so upset over him seeing them kiss? "And?"

"He saw us," she stressed again.

"I know. But your point?"

"Bright, don't you understand that I wanted to ease him into it. He had no idea we were even seeing each other. I mean, you're not really around Harriet and it's only been a few weeks, I didn't think I needed to bother with telling him. But now, he gets to meet you, or the back of your head," she laughed while taking another gulp of her drink which was half empty by now, "While I'm kissing you. He's never going to like you now."

"I'm not too concerned with him liking me," Bright answered, "So if that's what you're worried about, don't be."

April sheepishly looked at the ground, unable to tell Bright what was really on her mind. She really didn't care, well too much, that Jackson had caught her with another man. No, she mroe so cared about the look on his face. The heartbroken look that she had only seen once before, that look of sad acceptance he had on his face when she accepted Matthew's proposal. He had given in and it gutted her. But, how could she tell Bright that? He'd only assume, and rightfully so, that she had feelings for Jackson. However, despite being a doctor, and a surgeon at that, she couldn't even define her feelings.

"I just want to have fun and forget about Jackson for the next couple hours, please," she looked at him and interlocked her hand in his.

Bright had noticed her drink was all but gone, but he didn't say anything. He didn't want to pry into what wounds April Kepner still had, because he knew that she wasn't telling the whole truth. Falling in love is a whirlwind, but falling out of it, completely, is practically impossible. He should know, if Hannah were still here April Kepner would be the furthest thing from his mind.

"Thank you," Amelia gasped, as the two made it back to the booth the married couple was lucky enough to grab, "I needed some alcohol to calm me down. You wouldn't believe how much this one talks."

"I think you're a pretty good judge of that, seeing as he's your husband," Bright laughed as he passed Eric his scotch.

"My man," he replied as he gratefully took the cup from Bright, turning to April he said, "Spill your drink Kepner?"

"No," she shortly replied, "Just feel like drinking."

"Want to make it a competition?"

"No," Bright and Amelia replied in unison.

"Why not?" Eric asked, "I bet I could outdrink this country girl any time, any place."

"Is that a challenge I hear?"

"If you're willing to take it."

Amelia looked on in horror as April and Eric shook hands.

"I wipe my hands of this," she said.

"Me too," Bright added, "I'll make sure you get home safe, but you know I can't support this."

"You grew up in Wisconsin," April stated, "Drinking is in your blood. Come on, don't back down from a challenge.

"If the challenge was PBR and we were tailgating a Packer's game then maybe I'd try it. But my college days are long over, so I'll just sit and observe."

"Oh you're no fun," April pretended to sob.

"I'm plenty of fun in other areas."

April's cheeks turned red, as she looked at Amelia whose eyebrows were raised in curiosity, "You mean, you two haven't done it? Hasn't it been three weeks?"

April quickly finished her drink, "Eric, shall we go to the bar?"

"Right behind you."

The two of them left the booth, to get God knows what poison to numb the pain. April wanted to forget about Jackson. The only other times in her life that she drank to excess were when she wanted to forget about Jackson and all the pain he had caused her. She had been so drunk the night of the gala, she had asked Arizona to try on her leg. Times were so much simpler then, she had a fiancé that she thought she loved and no dead children. God, just thinking about it right now made her miss Seattle and all the friends she'd left behind. Sure, she's sent a few texts to Arizona and Alex, but distance doesn't make the heart grow fonder. She was a firm believer in out of sight, out of mind. Besides, she was pretty convinced she was never that great of friends with the other surgeons at Seattle Grace anyways. They were friends with Jackson, and only friends with her because of him. Why else would they abandon her this year, band against her like she was this vile enemy because she took Meredith's job when she refused to follow the Chief's orders. Even Jackson had ostracized her; her best friend had treated her like a vulture.

Eric was drinking because today he'd lost a patient in a routine breast augmentation surgery. Nothing in her chart would've shown otherwise, but she simply couldn't withstand the operation. He hated losing patients, well most doctors did. But he hated even more not knowing exactly why. The body is a mystery and he wasn't interested in figuring out its twists and turns. Death meant failure and he hated to fail. He didn't do it often, but when he did, he'd always go home and open up the bottle of twenty-five year old scotch his father bought him when he got his fellowship at Northwestern and pour himself a glass. He's been working there for eight years and the bottle is almost empty; he's only had eight patients die without cause.

"What're we drinking Kepner?"

"Whisky, straight."

"A true challenge?" He toyed, "Are you sure you're up for it?"

"Six whiskies," she told the bartender, "Straight."

Meanwhile, Amelia and Bright were left to their own devices at the table. She took this opportunity to grill him about April and their lack of a sex life.

"So, tell me, why haven't you to had sex?"

"It hasn't come up," he avoided.

"Come on, you and Hannah had sex on the second date. I know you're not being chaste because you're holding a vow of chastity, you do have a son."

"And she has a daughter, I'm quite certain she isn't a virgin either."

"So, have you two even breeched the topic of sex?"

"Honestly?" He asked.

She looked at him wide eyed, indicating that she wanted him to continue.

"No. We haven't. It's only been a few weeks, I don't want to pressure her into anything she doesn't want to do."

"Have you," she paused, "Since Hannah?"

"No."

"Are you protecting her or are you protecting yourself?"

"Does it matter?"

"Yes."

"Both, I guess."

"You're still not over her, are you?"

"Can you ever be over the love of your life?"

Amelia looked at April and Eric, who had both just downed a glass of whiskey at the bar, she thought about April, and Jackson and what she had said about him, "No," she sighed, "I don't think you can ever be."

Jackson took Harriet to the park, he didn't realize that it'd feel so creepy at 7:30 at night, but he did it anyways. Back in Seattle she had loved playing outside. She even loved the rain. She'd cry if they took her inside, so he and April had invested in heavy-duty raincoats and would brace the rain with her. He had never been the rain's biggest fan, but then Harriet changed his mind. Rain brought about a sense of clarity, the scent of it was calming, rain-washed everything away.

He sat on a swing, swaying back and forth with his daughter in his lap. The playground was empty, he assumed most parents had already tucked their kids into bed or were eating dinner with them. Most wouldn't be at an odd playground, swinging on a swing with their one-year old daughter, but here he was, doing just that.

"You've changed," he told her, "You smell different."

"Dada," she replied.

Jackson smiled, "You didn't forget," tears came to his eyes and his voice was croaking. She hadn't forgotten. He looked up at the stars, or the two he could see thanks the Chicago smog, and smiled. He had always found peace in them. Just like April.

"Yeah, I'm you're dada and I'm never going to let you go, ever." He nestled his nose into her head and kissed the hat he had put on her, it was still early October, but you can never be too cautious.

April and Eric had made their way back to the table, where Amelia was looking at her phone, texting Cassandra about Alyssa and Jack. Bright just stared at the table, admiring whatever wood it was made out of. Maple? Oak? Birch? Who knew? He didn't want to talk yet, because he knew if he did, the words would come flowing out of him. He was still in love with Hannah, that just doesn't go away, and every piece of logic inside of him told him that he needs to move on. Hannah would want him to move on. He shouldn't spend his life chasing after a ghost. But a part of him could say the same thing to April, who is he to stand in her way when she clearly still has some kind of feelings towards Jackson. He shouldn't stand in her way. Should he?

"Three for you," April stated, "And three for me."

"I guarantee you're going to regret this," Eric playfully threatened.

"Are you two serious?" Amelia quipped, "You're lucky we don't have to take care of Alyssa tonight, I don't want her being scared for life over her ridiculously drunk father."

"Well, since Cassandra and Jo are taking her for the night, why doesn't her mother get drunk as well?"

"Because, someone has to drive you home," Amelia rebutted, as she refused the drink he offered her.

"Hey, no cheating," April hissed.

"We could play doubles?" Eric suggested.

"Are you forfeiting, Doctor Clemens?"

He grabbed his whisky flute and chugged, causing April to do the same. Bright looked at her with a type of nervous apprehension on his face. He needed to talk to her. He needed to sort out whatever he was feeling and whatever feelings she had for Jackson. Because they should have had sex by now, per 21st century standards they should have, or at least they should have breached the topic. But he hadn't seen the inside of her apartment and that bothered him.

An hour later, April and Eric were both pretty drunk. They each finished their three whisky flutes in record time and wanted to go for another round, but their significant others stopped them. It was already getting late, and April still had to pick up Harriet.

"Do you know where the hotel is?" She asked Bright as he opened up his car door for her.

"Yeah, it's not too far from here," he shortly replied.

April was fairly inebriated, and so she asked a question she normally wouldn't, "What's your deal? You've been super quiet all night."

"I don't want to get into it."

"Bright," she pestered, "I do."

"Well I don't," he yelled, causing April to jump in her seat a little, "I'm sorry," he hesitantly said, "I just don't think it's a good idea to talk about it right now."

"Bright," she urged, "I'm a grown up. Come on, I can take it."

He breathed in deeply, "Okay, why haven't we had sex?"

"What?"

"Why haven't we had sex?"

"It's only been a few weeks," she replied.

"Which is exactly why I haven't brought it up. But Amelia mentioned it tonight and I know why I haven't wanted to, but why haven't you."

April was shocked, Bright didn't want to have sex with her, and was she really that unattractive? "You don't want to have sex with me?" She couldn't hide the tears that were present in her voice.

"Oh no," He corrected, "April it's not that I don't want to have sex with you, it's just that, I don't think I want to have sex with anyone." He tried to explain, but he could feel his foot going deeper and deeper into his mouth.

"Hannah," she whispered, so quietly he could barely hear her.

He had pulled in front of Jackson's hotel, "You're the best thing that's happened to me since she died, but I'd be lying if I said you're the best thing that's happened to me ever."

She sighed before replying, "Are we breaking up?"

"No," he replied, "Not until you tell me what happens tonight."

"What do you mean?"

"Hannah was the best thing that ever happened to me, maybe Jackson is the best thing that ever happened to you."

"I highly doubt that."

"Well even if you do, I'm not going to let you go in there with strings attached to your back. For the next twelve hours you're off of 'girlfriend duty' do what you must to get yourself straight."

She kissed him deeply, "I'll come back to you."

"I hope so," he replied as their foreheads touched and their noses barely missed each other's, they were so close, they could feel the other's breath on their lips.

"You're a light I never knew I wanted," she confessed.

"And you're one I never knew I needed."

April got out of his car, reluctantly, and made her way into the lobby and to Jackson Avery's room, where the biggest argument of her life was waiting.

It was well past 10:30 when he heard a faint knock on the door. He swallowed deeply before he answered the door. In front of him was the petite red head that he had grown to love; wearing a deep cut plum top and black jeans with strappy black heels.

"Can I come in?" She shyly asked.

"Sure," he said, opening his body up for her to go past him and into the room.

She immediately sat on the bed.

"She's asleep," he began, "I had them bring up a crib. She's in the next room over; I figured we'd want the privacy to talk. She's fine though, I checked on her a few minutes ago."

"That's good," she replied, "That's, uh, really good."

"Are you okay?" He asked.

"I should be asking you that," she confessed, "I'm sorry about earlier. I never meant."

"It's okay," he interrupted, "I know you didn't do it on purpose."

"We're on a break," she confessed.

"This soon?" Jackson asked, raising his eyebrow a bit. He found it quite odd that they were on a break, what, week two in the relationship?

"It's only going to last twelve hours, depending on what happens between us."

"Well what does he think is going to happen?" Jackson asked as he took a step closer to April and grabbed the chair at the desk to sit down in.

"I don't know. He thinks that you're the love of my life and that I'm a fool to not see it through," she said as she leaned her whole body onto the bed. Now she was lying perpendicular on it with Jackson still sitting in the chair, neither one of them able to see the other's face.

"Maybe I am," Jackson suggested.

"I know you are," she said, causing Jackson to look at her with awe, "But love isn't enough. If it were, we wouldn't be divorced."

He could tell April was pretty drunk and so anything she said right now should be taken with a grain of salt, "If I told you I love you, right now, would you take me back?"

She looked up at the ceiling and thought for a second before replying, "No. I have my career here and you have Maggie. If I suddenly confessed my feelings for you, everything would go in the gutter. I couldn't do that, to either of us."

"My feelings for Maggie?"

"Oh come on Jackson, you don't think I noticed," she angrily sat up and stared straight into his sea-green eyes. They used to hypnotize her, but now they did nothing. She could stare daggers into them and they still would not make her release her hold, "Just admit you two had a relationship. Or have one, I don't know."

"April," he half sighed half laughed, she looked at him angrily, perplexed as to why he was laughing at her, "I'm not seeing Maggie, and I never have."

"You haven't?" Her voice shook slightly, as she inched herself closer to the corner of the bed and he inched himself closer to it himself.

"Never," he said, "She's my sister. I was there for her when her mother died, that's it."

"Oh my God," she covered her face with her hands, "I messed up my entire life because I thought you were screwing your sister," she erupted with a roar of laughter.

Jackson stared at her perplexed, "It can still be fixed. You can still come home." By now his face was inches away from hers and he did the only thing that felt natural, he kissed her. Not too deeply, but enough for her to take notice and gently touch her fingers to her lips.

"Jackson," she uttered, "We shouldn't."

"Why not?"

"We're divorced."

"We don't have to be."

"But we are," she scolded, "And that was your choice."

By now, he was on the bed and April was lying on her back. His hands were on either side of her shoulders and he was staring intently into her eyes, "I'm sorry," he began to kiss her neck, right in the spot that she had always enjoyed, "Can you ever forgive me?"

She lifted his shirt off his head, while the two of them made it further in on the bed, still facing perpendicular. She unbuttoned her jeans while he undid his, still looking at him intently. She had never stopped wanting Jackson, wanting him to be inside of her. Montana reopened the feeling for her, she had thought she could live without it, but she had come to realize that she couldn't. She needed him. Now.

He was erect, she could feel with her hands as they traced his abs and traveled down a bit further south, and she could tell that she was wet herself. Her body was ready. He thrust into her, gently, nothing too rough. She never liked it that way. But she didn't like it gentle either, she wasn't a teenager who was experiencing her first time, this was makeup sex, angry sex, lust sex, or sex out of love, she couldn't decide. But her nails dug into Jackson's muscular back as she gasped as the pleasure rang through her body. She didn't realize it would feel this good to have him come inside of her.

The two of them fell asleep in one another's arms. But April woke up in the middle of the night, with a splitting headache and the realization that she was naked and it wasn't Bright's arms that were around her, they were Jackson's. And she instantly felt a surge of regret. What had she done?

A/N: Thank you for reading. I hope you don't hate the April character right now. She's hurt and confused. But let me make it clear, she has not cheated on Bright. She would never do that. Please stay tuned for the next chapter. As always, please review this story, your reviews keep me writing. –R.