Amu stared down at her phone that she'd carefully hung back up, still she was jobless.
She felt it curl around her lungs, dance just over her toes in a bitter reflection; she couldn't possibly regret quitting her previous job but still felt the worry as she stared at her bills left unanswered on the counter, worrying over her home and the fact that she might lose it.
Amu sat down, staring at the lone hospital bill, begging hundreds out of her.
She regretted not saving up, regretted being foolish enough to think that because she had a life and a chance for many more years that she could just try to end it.
Amu wondered what it felt like to truly be on the edge of death outside of your own control; it was a bitter, nagging thought to whatever Ikuto had to go through.
He'd once had a chance to get married, have kids, or even grow old; now none of that was in his future.
The she wolf stood up on shaky legs just as she heard a knock on her door, counting her frantic steps to make herself look a tad more presentable and not at a loss of how to continue on from here as she opened the door to stare into blue eyes.
"I have a hospital appointment today." Ikuto simply said, and Amu cursed her own stupidity once more, because he looked much more presentable than she did and definitely more alive.
"Give me a second, and I'll be right out." She tried a smile, wondering if even a feasibly smile to help soften the blow.
"Alright." He didn't look sad today, just a little anxious; Amu couldn't help noticing as she walked back inside her house to grab her shoes and put them on with her socks as she tried to just look a little more ready for the day than she'd been before.
Ikuto was giving her a chance to try to make amends with her guilty conscience though she knew that her presence wouldn't erase how sick he actually was and that it couldn't make his life ten times better as she returned to his side.
He guided her along to the hospital, letting her fall into step beside him.
"Are you feeling okay today?" The words fell flat on her ears as she barely choked enough sound out of her throat to ask him this.
"Yeah, it's not any worse than yesterday." Ikuto shrugged, still the slightest undercurrent of unhappiness flashed in his eyes from the right angle for Amu to see it.
"That's good." Amu hoped that those words were the right ones as she stumbled through them, feeling their persistent ache.
"Yeah." Ikuto answered her though didn't tell her anything else.
"What's your family like?" It was random, but he had to have a family or at least one marginally better than her own.
"My sister's annoying." There was affection there no matter how softly spoken it was, "My mom's worrying herself to death. She's kind but weak, and my dad spends his day playing violin. He taught me to play a long time ago." Ikuto shrugged, almost indifferent about the words yet there was so much more to his eyes and his voice that he was not willing to admit.
"They must love you very much." Amu took a deep breath, chancing to look up into his eyes, silently acknowledging that while her family was just as messed up as her childhood, Ikuto had a loving family which he rightfully deserved. Amu certainly didn't deserve one.
"Yeah, they do." Ikuto smiled slightly though it had taken Amu a second to catch that look on his face before she'd realized.
Amu stared ahead as she grew silent; questions refused to circle around her head or provide her with a means to say something.
She took another deep breath, steeling herself for the heartbreak that this trip to the hospital might bring.