Author's Note: Okay, I decided what's going to happen with this story. It is still not done yet. However, I will make no promises about when it will be updated. If I ever get another dirty idea, I will add to this story (because you know you're only reading this because of the dirtiness). And with my corrupted friends, I'll probably get inspiration really fast. I got the idea for the last chapter from them (even though they don't know it). So…yeah. If you actually like this completely immature humor, there will be more to come. I remember when this story was only supposed to have one chapter…haha. So much for that. :D

Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi. So stop accusing me of owning it!

Picture Perfect (Part Ten)

"Oh…hey…mom. We're just…studying for our English final." I explained nervously.

"It didn't sound like that from downstairs! And it doesn't look like that right now!" My mom commented.

"We were…taking a break."

"Actually, Clare was demonstrating for us the correct way to perform fellatio on a male using this water bottle." Adam chimed in. He and Eli both snickered and I glared at them, while my mom stared at me like I had just set off a nuclear bomb in our house.

"Eli, Adam. I'm going to ask you to leave our house. Clare and I have to talk privately." My mother said sternly. They began to gather their things. "Move!" she shouted, and they scrambled out the door, Eli leaving behind his cell phone and Adam his flashcards. My mom and I stayed in the room silently until we heard the front door close.

"I'm so sorry, mom." I apologized, scared out of my mind. We had talked about…sex…and stuff…last year, but then I was innocent. I didn't think dirty jokes were funny, and no one told them around me. But now it was different. And I had no idea how she was going to lecture me on this, or how long I'd be grounded for. My mom paced around with her hand over her eyes and then sat down on my bed and looked down at her lap. I was afraid that this was just the calm before the storm.

"Clare…" she sighed.

"I'm sorry." I said again, "I know that was inappropriate and unexpected and uncalled for. And I swear it will never happen again…"

"It's okay, Clare." She interrupted.

"I know you're disappointed, but…wait…what did you say?"

"I said it's okay." She repeated, finally looking up at me, "and I'm not disappointed in you."

"Why wouldn't you be? I just pretended to give a blow job to a water bottle!" I blurted.

"Okay, I would prefer if you didn't use that language around me." She warned.

"Sorry." I was quiet after that.

"As I was saying…I'm not disappointed in you, Clare. You remind me a bit of how I was when I was your age."

"You laughed at sick humor, too?"

"Laughed at it? I was the one who made all of the inappropriate jokes with my friends!"

"But…didn't your mother expect you to be innocent?"

"Yes…and she was very surprised when she first caught me telling these jokes. But after she grounded me, she realized that it didn't really help. Once you're corrupted it's almost impossible to get out of it. So she told me exactly what I'm about to tell you." I groaned inwardly, but I paid attention in fear that I would get into even more trouble if I didn't.

"You're a teenager. I know that. And I know that everything around you is changing. You've traded play-dates for parties, kool-aid for coffee, and lollipops for lip gloss. And after that, it's only a matter of time before you trade your fart jokes for…well…things like you were doing with Eli and Adam. And as much as I hate to see you grow up so fast, I know that it's unavoidable. Besides, if you didn't know about this stuff, I would never get grandchildren."

"Mom!"

"Sorry. But it's true. And I know that this stuff is funny to every other kid your age. So as much as I want you to be the innocent one, I also want you to enjoy being a teenager. And that is why I am okay with this."

"That was…surprisingly open-minded of you."

"Thank you…but I still have some rules. No dirty jokes around me, your father, or teachers. I know what happened in school the other day."

"Really? I never told you."

"Why not?"

"I was afraid of getting this talk."

"Well, I get a call every time you get a detention. Twice in one week?" she raised her eyebrows.

"Sorry. Do you know why?"

"Yes…"

"Then why didn't you tell me that you knew?"

"I was having trouble believing that my seemingly innocent daughter had been corrupted."

"Don't blame me! Blame Eli!"

"Which leads me to my second rule…" Oh no. She was going to tell me that I couldn't see Eli. A wave of terror washed over me.

"…no boys in the house while I'm not home." I sighed with relief.

"No problem." I agreed.

"Good. Now finish your homework. Dinner will be ready in twenty minutes."

"Okay," she started walking out the door, "Wait, mom!" I called after her. She came back to the door.

"Yes?"

"Thanks for letting me grow up."

"No problem. But one more thing…"

"What?"

"Do you own any porn?" she asked.

"Gosh, mom! First Eli, and now you? No, I don't have any. Feel free to check my closet."

"Just checking! But I'll take your word for it."

"Good. I love you, mom."

"And I love you, even with your dirtied mind." I laughed as she went out the door.

Author's Note: Hooray for awkward conversations! Yeah..not that funny. But at least now her mom is accepting! I promise, next chapter will be better. Like I said, I'm bound to get an idea sometime soon. I may be a teenager, but I still love lollipops and kool-aid. I'm just a child at heart. So anyway, thanks for reading. And I'd be even more thankful if you reviewed…:D