Okay, Chapter 10 here! I'm not sure how many chapters this story is going to have, but it's definitely going to be more than 20. So...YAY?

HAZEL

The second Perry walked in the room, he could feel that something was going on. JD's eyes were closed and Dan was pacing the floor like a madman.

" What's going on here? " The doctor asked.

" Johnny says that he doesn't want to be alive anymore. " Dan whispered.

Perry looked at his young protege and raised an eyebrow. " He said that? "

" Yeah. He didn't even say why. "

Dr. Cox walked over to the younger doctor and put a hand on his forehead.

" What are you doing? "

" Checking for a fever. "

Dan lifted an eyebrow.

" Sometimes people say things that they don't mean when they have a fever. But your brother feels cold if anything. " Perry opened up a nearby kit and pulled out a thermometer. " I'm going to make sure that his temperature isn't dropping. We'll have a serious problem if it is. "

" Why would it be dropping? "

" Malnourishment. " He stuck the stick underneath JD's tongue and smack him lightly on the face. " Wake up, princess. "

JD stirred in the bed and spit the stick out of his mouth.

Perry growled and stuck it back in. He knew that he should probably start being more sensitive to his collegue, but the whole situation was really starting to irritate him.

" I need your temperature. Shut up and let me get it. " He snapped.

JD rolled his eyes.

" What's in your hand? " Dan asked Perry. He pointed to the stack of papers suspiciously.

Perry pushed the stack into Dan's hands. " Figure it out yourself. "

Dan skimmed through the papers, his eyes wide and shock evident on his face. He was silent for a few minutes before finally speaking up.

" I...I knew that it was bad sometimes...but..."

" Maybe you should have paid more attention. " Dr. Cox pointed out as he pulled the thermometer out of JD's mouth. " 97.1. Dammit, Newbie. "

JD looked down, shamefully and wrapped the blanket tighter around him.

" J-Johnny? "

JD stared up at his brother, confused, and tried to decipher what the stack of papers were.

" Why didn't you tell me? Why didn't you tell me that it was so bad? " Dan cried out, his heart pounding faster as each second went by. " How could you live like that? "

" Huh? " JD reached for the papers and felt a stabbing pain.

Dan dropped the stack of papers in JD's lap. He looked frantically at his brother's mentor before walking out the room, noticeably upset.

JD carefully picked the papers up and straightened them out before reading the top one.

Age 13, broken arm, sprained ankle. Suspected sexual abuse.

He swallowed back the bile that rose in his throat.

Dr. Cox wasn't supposed to know about this stuff. Nobody was supposed to know.

" What do you have to say there, Newbie? " Dr. Cox asked gently, trying not to startle JD too much.

" Why did you do this? " JD muttered, barely above a whisper. " Why the Hell did you have to dig this up? "

" I needed to know. " He stated simply, his eyes digging into JD's panicked blues.

" Nobody needs to know this. Nobody else can know. "

Dr. Cox nodded before snatching the papers out of JD's hands. " Fair enough. But you need help, Newbie. "

" It's been years, Perry. I'm fine now. "

" I don't believe that. If you're fine, then why did you tell your brother that you don't want to be alive anymore. "

JD rolled his eyes. " I was just trying to ruffle his feathers. I figure that the more worked up I got him, the sooner he'd get Mom and leave. He doesn't know how to deal with bad situations. He always runs away. "

Dr. Cox grunted at his last comment. The things JD was saying about Dan made a lot of sense. But knowing JD as well as he did, Dr. Cox knew that he wouldn't have said something as serious and potentially suicidal if he didn't mean it.

" I don't buy it, Newbie. "

" I don't know how to convince you. "

" If you're happy then smile, Newbie. Smile like you mean it. "

JD scoffed and shrugged. " No problem. "

He turned the corners of his mouth up slightly, but not drastically. It wasn't a smile that anybody would believe to be true. The look was forced and almost painful.

" Still not buying it, Newbie. " He said. " And I don't blame you for being messed up from all of this. "

" I'm not messed up! I'm fine, Perry! " JD exclaimed, worried tears flooding from his eyes. He needed his mentor to drop it. " I spent so long putting all of that behind me. Why are you trying to hurt me? "

Perry's mouth dropped. " You think I'm trying to hurt you?! I'm trying to help you! "

" It's not working. " JD sniffled. " I need you to just leave me alone. "

Dr. Cox shook his head, disappointed, and walked toward the door. " You can't pretend that you're fine forever. "

" I know. But I can for a little while. " JD's timid words bounced off of the wall and Perry clenched his jaw to keep from saying something he'd regret.

" You're going to do what you want, no matter what I say? "

" It's what you'd do. "

The older doctor was startled by the statement, but his protege had a point.

" Yeah. "

He walked out of the room and leaned up against the wall in the hallway, his hands on top of his head in a way that said, " I'm thinking about something that upsets me."

And he was. All those years with JD and he was just learning about such a troubled past. It was no wonder that JD was usually so clingy and touchy. He just wanted to know that somebody loved him. Hugs were like the ultimate test to JD. They proved that the person genuinly cared about him.

It was a test that Perry had failed, of course.

How could Dr. Cox possible help JD with such deep, emotional problems when the younger thought his mentor hated him? In fact, with all of his friends being so selfish and his family being...well, his family, who was JD supposed to confide in?

No wonder Newbie is so depressed. He's all alone.

--

JD felt empty tears wash down his face as soon as he was alone again. It all just seemed so hopeless.

He didn't know exactly how long it would take for his tailbone to heal. Even then, it'd be hard to move. It's too difficult to do a doctor's job when you have such an extensive injury.

Doesn't really matter...I might just quit. I have enough in the bank to survive until...until I don't want to survive anymore.

He had to wonder how long it would be until he completely hit rock bottom. It didn't seem that far-fetched from the way he was currently feeling.

Dr. Cox is actually trying, and I pushed him away. Why the Hell did I do that? He's the only one who has made an effort.

He stared out his window again. The beauty of nature, no matter how corrupted by society, was still beautiful. There were so many beautiful things hidden beneath all of the ugliness.

He wondered if there was still beauty behind all of his pain. If so, he didn't think he had the energy to find it.

How are you liking it. I know it kind of slow going, but I'm going to start speeding things up so that I can get on to the main part of the story. I'm trying to decide if I want JD's mom to play a big part in the story, or if I just want to use her to establish JD's past, then get rid of her. LOL

What do you think?

By the way, thanks a bundle of all of the lovely reviews. I know I haven't been replying, so I'm really sorry. I've just been trying to write the story.

If you want, leave bom chicka wah wah if it was good and a boo if it sucked!

Hazel