"And... you're an idiot." Everyone turned to look at Ed. "What? Don't tell me I'm the only one thinking it. By the way, could you do us all a favor? Just drop the Uchiha off here, and we'll give him a lift back to Happy Valley Konoha. Call it an early birthday present."

"You're pretty cocky for a civilian," the masked man replied. They were now back in the original meeting room, confronting the 'villain'.

"I'm not a civilian."

"Fascinating." Ed rolled his eyes at the sarcasm. "But I'm afraid Sasuke and I must be off." Cue the disappearing act, complete with smoke clouds.

"Edward," Kakashi rumbled, "you should be a little more cautious." Ed just shrugged, and sighed as everyone started talking business. As he was starting to doze off, Shikamaru Nara slid into the seat next to him.

"Hey, you came at a good time," Ed told him. "Nap time is just starting."

"Oh, good." Shikamaru deadpanned. "Hey, has a masked man by the name of Madara Uchiha shown up here by any chance?"

"Gosh, how did you know?" Shikamaru sighed in response.

"Troublesome. What's going on now?"

"They're bickering over who should be leader of an alliance made up of all the countries." Shikamaru raised one eyebrow, and then rested his head against the table.

"Joy."

"My thoughts exactly."

...

"Hey, Al! We're back!" Ed announced, smile plastered on his face. Yamato and Naruto stepped out of the inn. "Hey... where's Al?"

"Up here," a voice giggled. Ed looked above him to see his brother standing upside down on a tree branch. For a moment, he wondered how it could support the weight of a whole armor suit. Then again, it didn't really matter.

"How did you do that? I thought life force couldn't be replaced."

"Actually, chakra comes flows throughout your body in veins. The largest source of it is in a cavity at the center of your body. The bottom of the cavity is life force; irreplaceable. But there's a layer of replaceable energy on top that can expand. To access it, you need to jump start it using special techniques. It was all in this scroll that Yamato-san let me borrow." Alphonse climbed back down the tree and picked up a scroll at the base of it. He handed it to Edward.

Fifteen minutes later, Edward Elric was standing upside down on a tree branch. "Ha! This'll show those Xingese losers who's boss!"

"Brother, don't insult foreigners just because you don't understand them."

"I understand foreigners! Just look at how well we've gotten along here! It's just that guy with shifty eyes. Don't tell me you like him?" Al sighed.

"His name is Ling, and you should treat others with respect."

"Whatever. After all, I'm not going to marry one of them."

"May is a very nice girl," Al sniffed, "and besides, she might change her mind as she grows up."

"Not to interrupt, but we've packed everything and we are ready to leave. Unless you'd rather be left behind..." Kakashi drawled. Ed opened his mouth to unleash a retort, but at that moment, his feet became unstuck and he dropped like a rock. Fortunately, his little brother caught him... after Ed had screamed like a little girl.

"You sure have got some lungs, haven't you, Elric?" Neji Hyuuga sighed, stepping out of the inn with the rest of the group behind him.

"Shut up, Blank-Eyes!"

"Aha! See, I'm not the only one who thinks your eyes are freaky, Neji!" Naruto cheered loudly. Shikamaru and Yamato sighed simultaneously. It was going to be a long trip back.

...

They were on their way into the Hokage's tower the next morning when a pink-haired girl stopped them. Ed recalled seeing her before. Alphonse remembered her, too. "Sakura-san?"

"Tsunade woke up!" Sakura blurted. "She's awake, and by this afternoon she should be well enough to take on Hokage duties." Naruto cheered.

"Oh, what a relief." Kakashi smiled, but Ed had a feeling that underneath that obviously fake smile, the man was crying tears of joy. Maybe that was why three fourths of his face was always covered. "Can we go see her?"

"Of course." As Sakura took them up to the hospital, Ed's mind started to wonder. What kind of woman was their leader? Deceptive, like Kakashi? Brilliant, like Shikamaru?

No, she was like Izumi Curtis. With narrowed eyes and a commanding presence, the fierce blonde could be Izumi's best friend. When she punched Naruto into a wall for being disrespectful, he didn't even bat an eye.

"Who're you? Armor Suit and Blondie?" she demanded.

"We're the Elric brothers. All we want is access to your library. You can thank us for raising your village up from the dirt later." Ed sassed her because, after all, if he could survive Teacher? He could survive anybody, even her blonde twin.

"You're a construction worker?" she scoffed.

"We're alchemists." Cue eyebrow raise.

"We use alchemy...it's kind of like chakra?" Al guessed. "We're not really sure how the two are connected. Basically, we can move and reshape things instantly, as long as we know what they are made of." She nodded.

"You two are dismissed. Naruto, Shikamaru, and Yamato are dismissed as well." Naruto whined as the four of them exited. Ed ignored him.

"Hey," Al wondered aloud, "If Kakashi was voted to lead the Allied Forces, and Tsunade is the real Hokage... what's gonna happen now?" Yamato paused for a moment, and then answered.

"They'll need to revote." Shikamaru and Ed just looked at each other.

"...You have got to be kidding me." Shikamaru shook his head. Ed face-palmed.

"Truth must really hate me."

...

Phew! This chapter was kind of difficult. I finally decided to cut off from canon and take things off on my own. Now I have no idea how close I'll stick to it... oh well, I'll figure that out later. Thanks for reading!