Ukime No Sekisetsu
Part V
Tangible: Kagome
Over and over, Kagome kept repeating the incredible, the impossible truth.
He is not dead - he is not dead! All this time -
The smiling face of the kitsune in front of her was nothing like the face she had seen in her dreams, her nightmares - but there was something of the kit in him still, something that came out of him for her - something that eased, just the tiniest bit, the old, cold, ache.
Three times, she reminded herself that a century had passed, a century of great changes that must have included many battles, long journeys. If she had not changed, that was only because she was accursed and blessed with an unchanging form and the shikon no tama's power. Shippou, though...Shippou had grown up.
He did not seem to care how much time had passed, so excited was he, almost delirious with merely being in her presence. The kit she remembered had grown taller than she was, almost as tall as Sesshomaru, and his hair hung in a long braid. She supposed it was Sesshomaru who had given him the armor, armor that looked like the steel Sesshomaru himself had once worn. His smile had not changed, but she could tell that he no longer used it as frequently. His voice startled her from her introspection.
"Kagome?"
She shook her head, smiling, and then looked up so he could see it.
"I…I'm sorry Shippou. I thought you were dead, I thought that day, that battle, when Naraku…"
She could not say any more than that, but it was not necessary. His bright, shining smile thinned, and dimmed. Darkness flecked the angles of his face, and he looked away.
"It took me three weeks to wake up. Sesshomaru brought me away from the battlefield, and when he returned he buried the dead...that he could find."
For a moment, his voice was shaky.
"We always thought that you and Naraku were consumed, together with the jewel. That you dissolved into nothing. The place where you were was burnt so badly it looked like a star had fallen."
Kagome shook her head.
Is this how easy it is to lose those you love? I have never needed to be alone…
A shutter slid open over the darkness that brooded in her. The guilt she had felt over the loss of Shippou had been the worst guilt of all; he had only been a child.
"I am sorry, Shippou. I should never have let you onto that battlefield."
He smiled again, and reached over to touch her arm, light as a feather.
"Don't you remember, Kagome? I begged and begged not to be left behind. I promised I would follow you by myself if you left me behind. 'I'm a demon', I said. 'I'm strong', I said. I was just...wrong."
She gripped his fingers, and they were deadly and cool in her hands.
"It will always be my fault, Shippou…all of it. I will never forget that it was me who broke the jewel…and that it was me they died to protect. I am well punished, Shippou."
She held her hands over her chest, his captured hand between them, and closed her eyes. Suddenly wide-eyed, he felt a powerful, all too familiar pulse of energy from beneath her skin.
"The shikon no tama is inside me, where it started. Now, the miko in me touches it, and it is awake, infecting my blood with agelessness. I can not... I have not changed, Shippou. You see that."
It was true. He did not need to say anything.
A long silence fell between them, and the sun rose in the east like a leaping spear of light. Shippou looked across at Kagome, seeing a halo behind her as the sun grew higher in the sky, inch by inch. When the light touched her eyes, his smile softened. She had fallen asleep, and her face was at ease now as it had been on the long nights in their past.
He lifted her easily and gently, and lay her on the futon in the corner of the room. He had no idea why her sleep had been interrupted, or why she had run out into the night, but it didn't matter. He could wait, now that he had found her. Now that he had found her, everything would be right again.
Kagome slept a few hours of dark, dreamless sleep. Her dreams had been exhausted by the night's potential, and when she blinked and opened her eyes, there was a moment of surprise before she remembered the earliest morning.
Shippou. I am no longer alone.
There were other things she needed, though. Other memories, other smiles, other moments. Shippou was good. Shippou would help.
She sat up, and ran her hands through her hair. He had been sitting with his back to her, but now he turned and watched her stand and shake out her clothes.
"Shippou, where is Sesshomaru now?"
He blinked. That was not one of the questions he had expected her to ask. Smoothly, he stood and walked to the door. Sesshomaru's own scent was thicker near them than he expected it to be, and he wrinkled his nose. Had he missed…something? Kagome's face held no clues.
"I could find him, if I followed his scent. He promised he would go back to the house…but I do not know if he really meant it."
His eyes slid over her at an angle she remembered from his childhood.
"Yesterday was the first time he had been there in more than a year, and before that it was twenty, if not more. He has wandered over the whole of Nihon, and out across the water to the west."
Kagome came up behind him, and he followed the urging of her presence out the door. Behind him, he heard a rough clatter, and the corner of his eye caught her stringing her bow, slinging the quiver over her back. Her smile was taut, but the tones of her voice pled with him.
"Will you take me to him, Shippou? Sesshomaru…I do not understand Sesshomaru."
Shippou laughed, shortly, but turned his nose to the task. She was Kagome – he could not deny her.
"No one understands Sesshomaru, Kagome. Not even him."
She stayed silent, but her thoughts were racing.
I am close, Shippou, but I will not tell you how close. There was a reason…he left before you came.
She closed her eyes, and swallowed. Shippou was the past, the past that had come for her, but Sesshomaru merged the old with the new. They had all changed, becoming more complex, fitting together in strange ways.
In strange ways…yes.
Her hand came up to the corner of her mouth, and stayed there.
Phew! Part V, now ending. Part VI...I didn't even realize how far I'd gotten until just now. If more is good, please review! (I mean, I'll post more anyway but I'll be way happier about it if there are reviews!) And now, revisions are done! Yay revisions! (4/26, still! Go me!)
I just realized that somehow, this chapter ended up skipped, and the next one duplicated instead! How horrible! Fixed now! :D Much thanks to sayuri-girl, both for a great review and letting me know!