Chapter Ten
JB and Az
It felt like a decade before Wednesday finally came. I woke with a start that day, feeling like something was watching me. I sat up in bed and ripped open my curtains revealing the daylight beneath it. I searched frantically for what I wanted to see...for him.
I silently begged that it was him...a movement drew my eyes to the edge of the forest. That was when I saw it. A large brown wolf, it was as big as the one on the beach, if not bigger. It was staring straight at me. It's brown eyes watching me, drawing me in.
My heart sped up, it was Jacob. I knew it was him. Only one person had eyes like those. I would recognise them anywhere. My heart sped up. I shuffled closer to the window trying to get a better look. It sat there watching me, not breaking eye contact once.
There was a knocking my bedroom door which caused me to look away.
"Azalea, are you awake yet?" Asked Briarwood,
"Yeah," I sighed. He had rotten timing. I looked back towards the forest and he was gone. I sighed again, releasing a breath I didn't realise I was holding.
-xxxx-
I sat nervously waiting at the dining table. My empty notebook and pens ready. Briarwood's armchair was in the corner of the room where it was before, along with a cup of coffee ad his paper.
I stood up when I heard the knock at the door. Briarwood beat me to it again. He was so much faster than me, his wolf reflexes made him so much quicker. Even if he didn't shapeshift anymore.
I almost cried out when I heard Jacob's voice. I had missed it. I had missed him. Yesterday had been absolute torture without seeing him.
"Mr. Briarwood," he greeted, sounding happy. His voice playful. "Always a pleasure!"
"Don't push it boy." Muttered Briarwood, walking into the room first. Jacob grinned behind him. His eyes met mine causing my heart to race.
"Hey Az." He grinned, the same backpack slung over his shoulder. He had on jeans and was wearing a blue tshirt. It made his flawless skin tone stand out.
"Hey JB." I grinned, unable to look away. The room simply looked brighter with him in it. He walked around the table ignoring Briarwood's glares to the seat next to me. I had it pulled out ready for him.
"I brought a few different text books this time." Said Jacob, loudly. Briarwood hadn't sat in his seat yet. He was watching us suspiciously from the other side of the table.
"Oh great." I replied, smiling as his scent filled my nose. He was wearing that cologne again. It smelt strangely musty but for some reason it made my stomach turn over pleasantly.
"I thought we could go over some trig and geography." He continued, eyeing Briarwood discreetly. He opened a few books in front of us and pulled out a rather battered notebook and a chewed pen from his bag.
I noticed Briarwood, out if the corner of my eye, finally move to his seat and sit down.
"I thought he would never move," whispered Jacob. His eyes fixed on his notebook and pen. He was writing something...I looked down at it, he was writing 'blah blah blah blah' over and over. I couldn't stop myself from smiling.
"He's getting suspicious." I whispered back, lifting the open text book and pulling it closer to me. Jacob had moved his chair closer to mine. Although we weren't touching, I could feel the familiar heat radiating off him.
"Why?" Muttered Jacob, still writing his 'blah's'. "I haven't done anything wrong." I didn't say anything, wondering whether that was strictly true. Jacob sighed. "Okay, I have. I know I have but...I'm trying. I really am trying."
"I know," I whispered, feeling bad for him. I don't think Briarwood would ever forgive him though. I don't think he would even let him be alone with me...I decided it would be best to change the subject.
"Were you outside my window this morning?" I asked, watching for his reaction. His eyes widened, surely he had seen me see him. He had been staring right at me!
"I..." He mumbled, looking uncomfortable, his cheeks hinting a blush. "I...well...yes."
"I knew it was you!" I grinned, he looked a bit shocked to see me smiling.
"You did?" He asked, looking confused. "You're not mad?"
"No!" I said, louder than I planned to. I looked at Briarwood who's eyes were still on his paper. I sighed, relieved. "No." I repeated quieter, "why would I be mad?"
"I thought you didn't like wolves." He said, staring at my face. "You freaked out when you saw Paul at the beach."
"It's not like that with you." I shrugged, pretending it wasn't a big deal. It was though. I felt my cheeks heating up again. I was always blushing when Jacob was around.
"It's not?" Grinned Jacob, looking pleased with himself. His brown eyes wide and watching me. He leaned in slightly and his elbow brushed mine like it did last time he was here. My skin tingled where he had touched me.
"No," I grinned, finding it impossible not to grin back.
"You weren't scared then?" He grinned.
"I think we've established that." I blushed. His elbow brushed mine again and I blushed further, my face on fire. "Why were you there?"
"What?" He looked panicked again.
"Why were you outside my bedroom this morning?"
"Look," he sighed, after a long moment. "I want to tell you but I don't want you to freak out."
"I can handle it." I said, wondering what he was going to say.
"I...I just needed to see you." He admitted, my stomach did a somersault. "It...it felt like it had been too long. I wanted to know you were safe."
I looked at him, he meant it. I wished I wouldn't believe everything he said, but I did.
"You know," I muttered, scrambling down my mobile number on a piece of paper. "Friends text each other." I tore off the paper and slid it over to him. He grinned wildly, looking delighted.
"Yeah they do." He beamed, pulling out a small black mobile from his jeans pocket and typing in my number.
He allowed it to ring, I heard it vibrate from my room. He hung up quickly as Briarwood grunted from his chair.
"Now you have my number." He smiled. His face turned serious suddenly, "if you ever feel...scared or feel like someone is watching you. You call me okay?"
I looked at him strangely, what was he talking about? "What do you mean?"
"Just...call me of you ever need help or if you're scared. I'm not far away. I'll be here before you know it." I was confused, his hand reached across the table and covered mine. The warmth from him was so familiar, I had missed the contact. When he touched me like that I couldn't do anything but agree with him.
"O...okay." I whispered, staring at our joined hands. He rubbed his thumb over my hand, it tingled blissfully.
"Even if you're not in trouble..." he whispered, leaning closer to me. I sat there frozen, was he going to do? "...Call me anyway." I watched him as his face was inches from mine. My hands started sweating. His hand tensed over mine suddenly.
"O...okay," I whispered, looking at his lips. They were so full and ripe, they must be so soft to kiss. He leaned in closer, his breath hitting my face. He stopped suddenly, and sighed moving back and releasing my hand. I felt cold suddenly.
"Friends." He muttered, to himself, slumping in his chair looking miserable. "Stupid." He muttered, grabbing his notebook looking annoyed.
"What's it like being a wolf?" I asked, my voice sounding strange. He looked at me startled, as if he had forgotten I was there.
"It great," he smiled, "although some times it sucks. We have to stay in control all the time. If we get to angry or panicked we...change." I nodded, realising that was why he shook so violently in the past...He was trying not to transform.
"Does it hurt?" I asked, wondering what it looks like to see him change.
"At first it does." He shrugged, "but the more you do it the less it hurts. It doesn't hurt me anymore."
"Have you ever...killed a you-know-what?" I asked, he smiled at me.
"Yeah," he replied, looking pleased with himself. "A few."
"What are they like?" I asked, imagining a Dracula-type with fangs.
"Bloodsuckers?" He asked, I nodded. "Just...creepy. Everything about them is disgusting. I hope you never see one."
"Me too." I murmured, dreading the thought of coming face to face with a vampire.
"You do?" Asked Jacob, looking surprised.
"Of course." I replied, was he crazy? "Why would I want to meet something that is going to suck my blood and kill me?"
"I...I don't know," he sighed, looking relieved.
"Don't take this the wrong way." I said, smiling slightly. "But you're a bit weird JB."
I grinned wildly back at me. " I love it when you call me that Az." I blushed, wondering how he can turn a situation around so quickly. One minute it's tense and the next we're giggling.
"Tell me a bit about yourself." I asked, realising that I knew next to nothing about him. He grinned launching into telling me about his sisters and his dad. He didn't mention his mum so I thought it was best to leave it. He started telling me about the rest of the wolf pack. I was surprised to hear that others had imprinted. Emily was Sam's imprint. I felt guilty that I hadn't seen her since I ran out of her house in tears. It felt like it happened a lifetime ago but it was only a few weeks. He told me about Jared and Kim.
"...You see how much they mean to one another." He continued, sitting awfully close to me. I was watching him fascinated. "You can tell that all they need is each other. Some times when Jared comes back after we've been on a hunt Kim's all over him...She always gets so upset he might get hurt." He was watching me closely. Did they go out on hunts a lot? My stomach twisted painfully at the thought of Jacob getting hurt.
"Is Sam the leader then?" I asked, keen to change the subject. Jacob looked irritated.
"Yeah," he snapped, "but they offered it to me first. I'm the grandson of the chief."
"Oh." I replied, wondering why he was getting annoyed with me.
"I'm the rightful alpha." He repeated, his tone sharp. His eyes flashed with anger. "My father was Briarwood's alpha. He still is. That bond never completely fades." I simply looked back at him...What was he getting at? "Sam's not the boss of me."
What was he talking about? Why would I care who his boss was? Why was he getting so upset with me?
I sighed deeply, "what's the matter?" I asked, getting straight to the point.
"Would you care if I got hurt?"
"Of course I would care!" I almost shouted at him. "How can you say that!"
He looked down, "sometimes you act like don't care."
"Maybe because the thought of you getting hurt makes me want to crawl up and die!" I hissed, feeling angry. His eyes widened as he watched me. "Just because I don't scream it from the rooftops doesn't mean I don't feel anything! How can you play with my emotions like that? It's cruel!" I hissed at him, he looked devastated. I was furious, glaring at him. He looked very upset, his eyes pleading. I vaguely considered stomping off to my room but I wanted to give him a piece of my mind. Was this some kind of cruel trick?
"Azalea," begged Jacob, his voice sounded desperate. "Please...I didn't mean, I just wanted to know that you cared."
"That was low Jacob." I said, my voice sounding strange, sounding dangerous. My hands were shaking.
"I know." He begged, looking miserable. "Please, I just wish I knew what you were thinking. You're so hard to read. I only said it because I..."
"Maybe I don't make this obvious Jacob...but I have been through A LOT over the last few months. And I certainly don't need anyone trying to push me over the edge."
"I...I'm so sorry." He mumbled, he sighed looking down at his hands. "I'm such an idiot. I know I don't deserve you...to be in your life...to have you as a friend. I'm...I'm no good. I know it. I mess things up...I'm so sorry Az."
"Azalea." I corrected glaring at him. My heart was breaking but in my head I was so angry. I had to protect myself. I couldn't take the heartbreak. I couldn't weaken and feel bad for him...I was feeling bad. I felt awful but... "My name is Azalea." His mouth dropped open suddenly, his cheeks flushed. He grabbed my hand in his and I pulled it away harshly, my temper getting the best of me.
"You...you can't do that." He stammered, looking like if just slapped him.
"I can't pretend that everything's great if you're trying to hurt me like this." I hissed, somehow I had managed to keep my voice relatively low. I was angry at Jacob but I didn't want him to leave me.
"Az, please." He begged, he grabbed my hands again and held them tightly as I tried to pull away. The heat causing my hands to sweat further, my face burnt from embarrassment and anger.
"Don't call me that!" I snapped, his pleading brown eyes nearly breaking me. I could feel myself softening, I couldn't bare to be so angry at him. He looked so vulnerable.
"Times up!" Shouted Briarwood, louder than he needed to. I looked over to see him standing up next to his chair. I looked over at the clock. How had all that time passed already?
"Please forgive me Az," he whispered, trying to catch my eye. I looked away, feeling myself cave in. "Azalea."
"Is something wrong?" Asked Briarwood, cocking an eyebrow.
"No," I said, my voice shaking slightly.
"Well come on then Black!" He said, irritated. I stared at the clock desperate not to give in so easily, pretending to find it the most interesting thing in the world.
"See you Friday Azalea." Said Jacob, just the sound of his voice melted my temper away. I still didn't show it, determined to stay strong till he left, at least. I nodded, and squinted at the same clock. I heard him grab his stuff and be ushered by Briarwood out of the door. I sighed as he left the room and banged my head against the table. Not only had I told Jacob that the thought of him getting hurt makes me want to die, but I had also told him I didn't want him to call me Az anymore. I did though, I loved it when he called me that.
-xxxxx-
I managed to get through my normal evening routine before I crawled into bed. Briarwood noticed something was up when I tride to do the washing up with laundry powder but he didn't ask me about it. Thank god.
I snuggled under my heavy duvet cover before I noticed my phone flashing on my bedside table, which was strange as I never bothered to have it on me. No one ever called me...
I picked it up quickly, reading what it said on the screen.
You have 12 missed calls and 8 new text messages.
My heart raced, I opened the text messages. They were all from the same number...A number I didn't recognise.
Az. Azalea. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean what I said. Please don't be upset. I can't take it if you're upset. Especially when it's because of me. Just let me know you're okay? Please just let me know that your okay.
Az, I'm so sorry about the patrol thing. I'm sorry I only said that stuff because I was jealous. I know it's no excuse but I wanted you to have some sort of reaction. I know it's bad Azalea but I really need to know that you care about me too. I really care for you Az. Please don't make me go back to calling you Azalea again. Please.
If this is about the getting hurt thing. I wouldn't really get hurt by a leech. I'm made of stronger stuff than that. I'm so sorry about everything. Please forgive me? Or just text me back so I know that you're okay.
I'm so sorry about everything you've been through Azalea. Please, sometimes you seem so strong it's easy to forget about all the crap you've been through. I know I acted like a insensitive prick, I promise I'll do better in the future. If you let me anywhere near you again. I understand if you want nothing more to do with me but just send me one text so I know that you're okay. Please. I need to know that you're okay.
You there? I'm sorry I said that stuff. I've been thinking about it and it was really harsh. Are you okay? I'm fine on patrol. Nothing like that would happen to me. Please just let me know you're okay?
I've been chatting to Kim and she says that if Jared said that stuff to her she would if been really upset too. I really didn't mean to hurt you. I know it's stupid but I was just jealous that you didn't react when I said patrol was dangerous. Az, you there?
Azalea. I know these texts are probably freaking you out but I need to know if you are okay? Just tell me you're okay? Just one text. Please.
I've just been over to your house and I know I sound like a psycho/stalker but I can't hear you moving around in there. You are okay aren't you? Please just tell me your okay and I'll leave you alone.
The texts where spread out since our study session this afternoon. The last one was sent five minutes ago. Excited, I quickly typed a reply...
Hey Jake, I'm sorry about yesterday. I really overreacted. It all sort of snowballed. I shouldn't have shouted at you like that. I really don't know what came over me. Azalea.
The phone rang almost as soon as I sent the text. I hung up on the call. I was too embarrassed to speak to him on the phone...What would I even say?
Please just answer the phone. I need to know that you're okay. Are you okay? I'm so sorry. JB x
I'm fine. I'm just embarrassed. I don't know why I got so angry, but I didn't appreciate what you said about Briarwood. Azalea.
Please Az, I just got jealous when you didn't react when I was talking about Jared and Kim. She loves him so much and I wanted you to look at me like that. I know it's wrong. I'm sorry about the Briarwood stuff too. That was out of line. Please, are you okay? I couldn't stand upsetting you like that. Please, I'm so sorry. I feel awful. x
I'm alright. Really I am. I'm just confused. Why did you say that stuff about alpha's? It didn't make any sense. Az
I'm sorry, I know it's stupid but I didn't want you to think I was weak, that anyone bosses me about. It's not really like that, but Sam is my alpha. I'm sorry about what I said about Briarwood. You were so mad...I know I really upset you. You can be honest with me. JB x
He sent another before I had chance to reply...
I really didn't know you would react like that. You really care that much about me? I really care about you Az. I can't stand to go too long without seeing you. Can I come over? Please, I just need to see your face. x
Briarwood's here, I don't think he'd appreciate you coming over this late. Believe me when I say I'm fine. It's best if you don't come over. Az
I'm sorry but I just need to see you...I won't come up to the house. Just open your curtains? I just need to see you. Please, I'm begging Az. x
Ok. Just don't get caught. x
I opened up the curtains to see him already standing on the edge of the forest. He was exactly where the wolf was sat this morning. I couldn't see his face but I could see his figure. I knew instantly that it was him. Relief washed over me. He was okay. Thank god.
You look pale. Have you been ill this afternoon? Have you eaten? How are you feeling? JB x
Jake, I'm fine. I promise. How long have you been stood there? Az
It doesn't matter. What matters is that you're okay. I'm so sorry Az, I keep doing everything wrong. I can't get anything right when it comes to you. I'm sorry about what I said about My dad and Briarwood. Forgive me? JB xx
It's forgotten. But Jake, I've got to say we can't keep carrying on like this. Can't you just accept that I like you and we're friends? Az
You do? You still want to be friends with me? JB xxxx
Yeah, I do. But we have to be careful in front of Briarwood, or he'll stop us seeing each other. I'm sorry too, about how I reacted. I shouldn't of gotten so mad. Az x
You have nothing to apologise for. But do me one favour, call me JB again? I'll know you've properly forgiven me if you do. I'll wait if you want, I'll earn it back. I just need you in my life. Your JB x
Okay JB it is, let's not talk about it anymore? I enjoyed hearing about your family today. Az x
Yes! You called me JB! You'll have to meet them some day? My sisters come home for the holidays so maybe you could see them then? It was good to see you today. Do you think I'll ever be able I see you without Briarwood there? JB x
It was good to see you too. I'm not sure, I don't really want to do anything behind Briarwood's back. Az x
Sure. I just thought it would be nice to talk to you on your own. You'd be safe with me. I'd never let anything happen to you. JB xx
I know that. It's not that, I just hate lying. Az x
You're amazing Az. Really, I'm so lucky just to have you as a friend. I was wondering, Jared is having a few movies tomorrow night and I wondered if you wanted to come? Please say yes. JB x
That would be great! I love movies! I'll check with Briarwood in the morning. Who's going? What movies was Jared thinking of? Az x
Me!...erm, I'm not exactly sure. Kim probably and maybe some of the other guys. There'll be loads to eat. It'll be sooo great if you come. Jared was thinking some scary films. JB x
I'll try my best to come. I'm a bit of a wimp when it comes scary films though...I get quite jumpy. Az x
I'd let you hold onto me if you wanted! Lol. Please come tomorrow? It'll be fun, plus you can meet some more of my friends. I don't know if I can wait till Friday to see you. JB x
It would be nice to see you too. I'd better get some sleep. I'll see you tomorrow if I can make it. Az x
-xxxx-
A/N:
My god! This chapter was THE HARDEST to write, usually I know exactly where I'm going with it, but this time...NIGHTMARE. I re-wrote the ending at least five times. I hope it reads okay.
ANYWAY, I hope you enjoy! Again, a big thanks to all my reviewers, followers and subscribers. Every time I get a email notification it's a confidence boost!
I love you all and especially Monsieur Black! Xxxxx