It's a holiday miracle! :) Hope you guys enjoy.


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Chapter 9: Through the Fog


Azula stopped at the water's edge, and she closed her eyes.

She took a long breath, inhaling deeply, as though she might meditate.

They had crossed the entirety of the Earth Kingdom. By foot and by ostrich-horseback. And a little ways across this sea was the Eastern Air Temple, a place that was probably housing the Avatar. He was probably there right at this very moment. They were so close. If they had been able to cross the Earth Kingdom in about a week, then surely they would be able to reach the Air Temple in no time at all. Boat travel had the potential to be much faster than land travel. Success was so close that she could almost taste it. Ahh… So close.

Azula released the breath, exhaling a long sigh as the difficult reality of the next steps seeped into her mind.

They would have to find a boat. It wasn't like they could swim across the sea. Well, she supposed they could, technically. But that would just be inefficient. Not to mention unnecessarily dangerous, especially in the middle of the night. Azula opened her eyes and squinted out into the distance. It was difficult to discern much detail in the darkness, but she could see that there were no lights, no silhouettes of houses or buildings. It was probably only beach and ocean for miles. The partial moon was obscured by thickening clouds that were slowly overtaking the sky, and this decreased the amount of natural light that illuminated the beach. No signs of a town, no signs of a dock, no signs of people or boats to use. Not even a sign stuck in the sand. Great.

And now that they had stopped moving for the moment, Azula realized that she was very, very tired. If she closed her eyes, it would have been easy to fall asleep. Even on the uneven, sandy ground. Even without a blanket underneath to protect from the natural filth of this place. Even with the night chill in the air. How far away were they from a dock? Or a town? Did they still have hours and hours of wandering ahead of them? She was going to need at least a short break soon, so she could maximize her strength.

A wave of water rushed over her feet, cold and unpleasant. She was far too close to the ocean. It was almost like ice. Azula moved a few paces back from the shoreline, and Zuko walked forward, passing her in silence.

He crouched down at the water's edge. From the distance, she watched him wash his face. She recalled rinsing her face with some of the water from their canteen just a few days ago. It had helped her feel a little better about all of the difficulty that they had been through. But using the ocean water seemed different than using drinking water, or even water from a lake or creek. The ocean was tainted with wildlife and filth and debris from navy vessels. It would feel like adding another layer of grime.

So, instead of washing up as he did, Azula sat down in the sand. The relief on her muscles and joints was immediate. She felt like an old woman, rather than a girl of fourteen. An old, filthy peasant woman. It was not right. Gods, she was overdue for a real bath. Would she ever have the opportunity to wash up properly again? She felt more and more disgusting every day. Sweatier and grittier than she had ever thought possible. It wasn't fair that the princess of the Fire Nation should be reduced to washing herself in the sea water. She should not be living this life of disgrace.

Zuko returned from the water after a few minutes, and he stood in front of her, blocking her view of the ocean. Not that she cared, since there wasn't much to see in the dark. She knew that they had to start moving again. He was probably waiting for her to get up. It was difficult to tell how long it would be before they reached access to some kind of water travel. They should not waste any more time. But her body protested the very thought of standing up again. Her ankles ached. Her feet ached. Her back ached. Even her shoulders, uninvolved in walking, ached.

"Are you ready?" Zuko asked, still waiting.

"I'm sore," Azula told him. "Make yourself useful and be my palanquin."

Zuko scoffed. "I am not carrying you anywhere."

Azula sighed dramatically, though she was not particularly upset or offended. She had not truly expected him to agree to such a task. "Yeah," she said, leaning back on her hands, savoring these last moments of rest. "You probably aren't even strong enough to get me through a mile of travel. It would be a waste of effort."

He rolled his eyes. "I could carry you, easy."

"Whatever you say," she said dismissively, though she was fairly certain that he could lift and carry her, if he desired to do so. He had held her weight before. She was just teasing him.

"I'll show you," he challenged, stepping closer. He held his hand out to her.

Azula put her palm up, stopping him from advancing. "Lighten up, Zuko," she said. "It was a joke. I don't really want you to carry me." She stood without his offered help, her joints and muscles and everything protesting the movement. She was still aching, but the sitting had helped a lot. If they found a boat, they would have the opportunity to sit again. It would be fine. "You know, you really need to learn how to read people."

Zuko crossed his arms over his chest. He disregarded that comment and started up the beach, and Azula began to follow.

It was about an hour of walking before they came upon a mild victory.

A long wooden dock stretched out into the sea, marked by a single wooded post in the sand. It seemed as though there was a place for a torch here, but no one had lit it. So there must be a town somewhere nearby. Not that they needed the town; they only needed the water transport, and here it was. There was a small, old canoe attached to the dock by a rope. Carefully, they crept onto the rickety surface. No one else was in sight.

Zuko burned the rope attaching the canoe to the dock, and Azula sat at the end of the little boat. It was so good to be sitting again. There was an oar on the floor of the canoe, but she had no intention of using it. She turned to face the shore that they would soon be leaving behind, and she lifted her hands together to parallel the sea water.

"You'd better sit," she advised.

Zuko wasn't listening to her. He stood at the opposing end of the little canoe, and he gazed out into the distance. He had picked up the oar, clearly not thinking. When was he going to learn to pay attention?

She sent fire bursting out from her palms, which jerked the little boat sharply to life, the force of the flames propelling them forward across the water. The sudden, lurching motion caused Zuko to stumble, almost losing his balance, almost falling over. He glowered at her as he sat down, and she spared him a look of patient condescension.

She continued to push them forward, toward their mission.


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Taking turns with this firebending propulsion seemed like a great idea, since they wouldn't lose any momentum forward while also still having the opportunity to rest or meditate as needed. Azula had gotten an hour of sleep on her turn to rest, and then on her next turn, she had eaten and meditated. It made a big difference. And now, she was propelling them forward again while Zuko was supposed to sleep.

The air was growing heavy with fog.

Instead of resting, Zuko leaned against the little canoe wall with his arms folded over his chest. He was sulking about something. He should be excited. Didn't he realize just how close they might be to reaching their ultimate goal? He had been working toward this for years. This increase in clouds could only mean that they were coming nearer to what used to be the Air Nomad territory.

"Don't be so moody, Zu-zu," Azula told him. "We're getting close."

"I'm not moody," Zuko snapped, his mood sounding worse than she had anticipated.

"What would you call it, then?"

Zuko huffed out an aggravated sigh. He turned so that his back faced her, his arms still tightly wound across his chest. Whatever, she thought, continuing her work of propelling their canoe forward. Let him brood. There was no need to bother with him again until it was his turn to push them forward.

The air was becoming thicker.

The myth was that the airbenders had deliberately chosen to live in a place that was surrounded by fog and clouds so that they would have the illusion of being more "one" with their element. That was a part of why it had been so easy to attack them on the day of Sozin's Comet. They couldn't even see it coming. Foolish Air Nomads. At least, that was what she had been taught in school. It only made sense; what was more airbender-ish than being surrounded by clouds? It seemed impractical though. Maybe when this place had been inhabited by people, it had been different.

The sun was beginning to rise, but the warmth and brightness of it was muted by the haze they were surrounded in. Why would anyone want to live in a place like this? The Fire Nation was so, so much better.

Air Nomads and their damn fog.

There was a dark shadow just ahead, growing larger and larger as their little boat approached.

The Eastern Air Temple.

This must be the base to one of the air territory mountains.

Azula ceased her firebending and waited for the canoe to stop on its own. Once it had, she stood and squinted into the clouds. At her movement, Zuko sat upright and turned to look at the foggy shadows before them. This was definitely the place. This was such a good step toward finding the Avatar. She could not refrain from smiling.

She picked up the unused oar and dipped it into the water, using it to guide them toward the rocky shore. This beach was nothing like the one they had been walking along earlier, and nothing like Ember Island. This place was all rocks and clouds and gravel. There were trees in varying stages of growth, boulders of all sizes, vines and decay out of control… This place appeared wild. The boat scraped the rocky shore as she guided it onto the beach. These mountains were much taller and more treacherous than the Earth Kingdom mountain that they had just crossed. This was going to be a different sort of challenge.

Azula climbed out of the canoe, standing on solid ground for what felt like the first time in a long time. Her legs still ached with exhaustion and overuse in spite of the solid rest that they had gotten on the boat. She felt oddly unstable, her hands trembling just slightly as she glanced around at the new place. All of the exertion of the continual firebending, probably. She had never firebent constantly like that for such a long period of time. It was no wonder that she felt weakened. Fortunately, it was probably nothing that another rest couldn't improve.

But not now, of course.


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The minutes of travel stretched into hours and hours, and before Azula knew it, the sun was coming back up again, another sunrise. Another day. All of this traveling felt mindless and unproductive, even though they were making progress across the mountains. Slow and monotonous progress.

They came upon an area of the mountainous pathway that was flat, with stones scattered all around. Perhaps there had once been an Air Nomad monument here, and in the attack long ago, it had been blown apart. Perhaps the ancient buildings were crumbling and falling apart with lack of people to properly maintain them. Perhaps there had been a windstorm, and rocks had been strewn all over the path.

As they walked, Azula kicked a fairly large stone that had found itself in her pathway. It rolled several feet ahead of her, still in her immediate walkway. When she reached it again, after a few steps, she kicked it again, this time at an angle. The rock rolled in front of Zuko. When he reached the stone, he kicked it forward, just as she had, and it rolled in front of her again.

Azula kicked it back to him. Zuko kicked it back to her. She kicked it again. He kicked it again. Again and again and again. There was something unexpectedly therapeutic in this. Kick, wait. Kick, wait. She watched him from the corner of her eye as they walked parallel to each other. He had his hands in his pockets, looking down at his feet as he walked. The very picture of melancholy. There must be something on his mind. Was it something specific, or was he just in a bad mood? Or perhaps the lack of proper rest was making him more temperamental? It could be both, she supposed.

Kick, wait. Kick, wait.

Maybe he missed home. Maybe he was thinking about Uncle.

Zuko kicked the stone, and it was a bit off-center this time. Azula stepped out of her path to reach it, in order to kick it back. She struck it perhaps a bit more forcefully than needed. The rock flew into the nearby trees, disappearing from view completely.

He rolled his eyes at her.

"There's something bothering you," Azula speculated aloud.

Zuko sighed through his nose. They walked a few more steps before he said anything.

"I have a lot on my mind," he muttered. "That's all it is."

A lot on his mind, she thought. Hmm. Maybe he was reflecting on previous strategies used to combat the Avatar's group, then. Or maybe he was recalling some of the foolishness that he had participated in during his time home. Or maybe it was something as innocuous as thinking on what he would do once they returned home for good. Personally, she would take a bath. None of these possibilities felt accurate though.

Azula nudged a new stone from the edges of the trail, jabbing it with her toe so that it rolled into his pathway just as the other one had. Zuko kicked it again. Azula kicked it again.

"You can talk to me, you know," she reminded casually.

Zuko said nothing. A long moment passed in quiet, with just the kick, pause, kick, pause in the background.

"You seem distracted," she added. "I can listen, if there's something you want to talk about. Maybe I could even help you with whatever it is."

"I doubt that."

Azula pursed her lips to mask her exasperation. She kicked the stone a bit harder than before, releasing a bit of her annoyance into the task. She made sure to keep it under control though, so that the stone did not fly out of sight as the first had. "Try me," she offered, quieting her voice so it sounded less like a command, and more like a gentle suggestion. "I won't say anything rude," she added. "We have a truce, right?"

There was another stretch of silence. Longer. They continued to kick the rock back and forth and back and forth, a small way to divert from the pressure of the conversation.

Zuko squinted at her, perhaps considering her words. She met his eyes with a steady, serious expression, and then looked back in front of her. She focused on the little rock moving back and forth between them. As though it was of no consequence to her whether he discussed it or not. She did not want to seem too eager for information.

"It's just…" Zuko spoke slowly. Carefully. "I thought that this life — chasing the Avatar, being banished from home — I thought that all of that was finally behind me. But it's not. Just as soon as I was starting to think that my life could be good again, we were sent out on this mission. It was all too good to be true. Of course it was. I feel — I feel like I'm stuck. I feel like… Ugh, I don't know."

Azula looked away. It was strange. His turmoil did not bring her the same satisfaction that it once had. Hmm. "I see."

"I'm so sick of this," Zuko continued, almost to himself. "I feel like I'm going to spend the rest of my life chasing around that stupid kid. We could be doing this for years!"

"We won't be doing this for years," Azula assured. "Look at how far we've come in just a little over a week. This mission will take a month or so at most."

"I thought that too, the first time," he said. "I would think: I'll be back by the next holiday. Then, when that passed, I'd think: I'll be back by my birthday. I'll be back by the summer. I'll be back by the new year. But I wasn't."

"This is different," she insisted, though she could not help but think about how she had been promising herself to return home by Sozin's Comet. She had given herself a deadline, too. "When you were first banished, it had been a century since the Avatar had been seen. Now, it's only been a week and a half since the solar eclipse. The Avatar was sighted by multiple people then. I spoke with him personally. We have much more going for us than you did when you first left."

"I guess so." He sounded unconvinced.

Pause. Kick. Pause. Kick.

"You've had a difficult path," she pointed out. "It's understandable to be frustrated."

"Yeah."

"Well," Azula shrugged a bit, in an attempt to improve his sulking. "Don't let frustration get the better of you. Just because you've failed before doesn't mean that you will fail again. This is a new mission."

Zuko did not answer.

"This is not forever," Azula added. It would not take them three years to succeed. She would not accept that. "When we arrive home with the dead Avatar and have banquets thrown in our honor, all of this struggle will be a distant memory. This will be worth it, in the end."

He was looking at the ground, at the rock as she kicked it. "The thing is, I'm not so sure that it will."

She eyed him, her brow furrowing. "What do you mean?"

Zuko frowned at the stone in front of him, nudged it more weakly than his previous kicks. "It just seems like no matter what I do, Father isn't going to care. You'll always be a better heir than me. The Fire Nation army is still killing people and ruining lives. What is the point of our success if the world is still so out of balance? How could it be worth it?" He sighed, shaking his head. "Sometimes, I think… What if I just…?"

He trailed off, leaving this thought incomplete. Azula stared, her heart pounding a bit more forcefully in her chest. Although he had dismissed his train of thought before completion, it was very apparent to her what he had been about to confess to. What if he just left? What if he just abandoned the Fire Nation? Abandoned her? Surely he would not be thinking about that. Surely not…

She did not have to ask for clarification, as he met her gaze. He did not have to add anything more. It was as clear as day. What if I just left? She saw his throat move as he swallowed, and suddenly, she could feel his stress so plainly that she wondered how she had not noticed it before. Perhaps she had been too distracted with everything that had been happening recently. It had been a fairly taxing week. His guilt and doubt was painted all over his face, in the tense line in his forehead, in his bent mouth, his grouchy attitude. She felt an odd thrill. It was a strange mix of excitement and dread. Father would have killed him, if he had heard that.

"You've thought about leaving the Fire Nation," Azula commented, calm and composed, and not at all like it was a terrible, disloyal thought to have.

"I wouldn't do that," Zuko snapped, turning his attention back to their rock, kicking it hard. It rolled far up their path, barely in sight anymore.

"Thinking about defection is dishonorable," she lectured. "Going against your nation like that is treason. The next thing you'll say is that you've considered joining the Avatar and his friends."

"I never said that!" he defended, his hands clenching into fists.

"Listen to me." Azula swept her hair back over her shoulder, her chin high. The perfect posture of someone born to nobility. "We are royalty. You are a prince. You need to act like it. We have to represent our nation well, even while away from it. Especially while away from it. You cannot be thinking about such disloyalty."

"I'm not!" Zuko argued. "I'm not going to do that! It just — it just crossed my mind, is all. It's not — it's not disloyal to be frustrated with all of this. It's not disloyal to be angry, or to feel hurt about it. I mean, what about you, Azula? Haven't you ever — Don't you feel even a little hurt?"

She raised her brow, displeased with his deflection of the topic into her own thoughts. "What?"

"You're lying if you say you don't," he accused. "You're amazing at everything you do. Everyone always said you were a prodigy, and you were born lucky. Father always liked you best. And now you're banished and homeless like he doesn't even care! We've been walking for days! We're barely sleeping at all! You have to feel hurt!"

Azula opened her mouth to speak, but she found that no words escaped. His words stung, and with every second, they ached more and more, as though he had stricken her. Because she didn't deserve this. She was better than all of this. She had been struggling with it. It was not fair for her to be living like this when she had been such an asset to the Fire Nation. She wet her lips. He didn't know what he was talking about, she thought defensively, reflexively. But… He did, though. Zuko was right. She felt hurt, and it was just an insult to injury that he was right about it.

"I don't…" Azula began, and she shook her head. It would be foolish to deny it. How could she not be hurt? How could she not think that all of this was unfair? He was right. She did not know what she should say. She did not know what she was supposed to think. How dare he turn this conversation on her?

Zuko was watching her with the most peculiar frown. His eyes moved back and forth over her face, like he was trying to read her. She cleared her throat, determined to not allow her expression to betray a single thought or emotion. She was better at this than Zuko was. She kept her eyes ahead, kicking the rock as she came upon it. She could feel his eyes on her face.

Zuko spoke, a quiet echo of what she had told him earlier. "You can talk to me too, you know."

Azula watched her dirty shoes as she walked. "What do you want me to say?"

"You can say whatever you want," he said.

It felt like she had a lump in her throat. He was being naive. There were repercussions to these things. Saying foolish, weak things, talking about defection and wounded feelings… Allowing those things to actually impact them… There were consequences! You can't just say whatever you want, she wanted to shout at him. Okay, so there were probably no secret agents hiding in the shadows, no servants to overhear anything questionable… But it was important to keep oneself guarded no matter what the situation. Admitting to any kind of weakness… She knew that the minute that emotions affected her judgment was the minute that she would be unworthy of her position. It was important to never allow stupid things like that to detract from important matters.

Suddenly, Zuko stopped walking, and he reached out. He grasped her wrist, stopping her pace as well.

"Hey… Listen," he said, lowering his voice. "This is just between us. I won't tell anyone what you say."

Azula gazed into his serious, earnest face, finding it difficult to formulate the words to match the ideas and thoughts that swirled around in her mind. The fact of it was… There was a part of her that wanted to discuss how unfair all of this was. It seemed like he really understood. It might even be a cathartic experience, talking about all that. She probably could say whatever she wanted. There would be no repercussions; she knew that no matter how serious or angry Zuko acted on the surface, he would always be sensitive and vulnerable on the inside. She could hardly picture a situation in which he tattled to the Fire Lord on her. She felt sweat prickling at her neck. His fingers felt much too warm on her forearm. What could be wrong about admitting to the struggle, or the hurt, or…? Maybe she could just…

No! What was she thinking? She should not be so weak that silly frustrations caused her such distraction. She should not be so pathetic that emotions could disrupt her equilibrium. She was stronger than this! Zuko… He probably just wanted her to be as shameful as he was. He wanted her to express the reservations in her heart. He wanted her to think about defection and the what ifs. Maybe he just didn't want to be the only traitor in the family, in the absence of Uncle. Maybe he just didn't want to be alone. She could understand that, a little bit, if that was the case. She did not want to be alone either. But, still. Could he sense that she had had uncertainties about this mission, about Father's intentions? Was he trying to manipulate her?

She could imagine Father's severe expression in her mind's eye. She would suffer, engaging in such potentially rebellious discussion. She was the princess of the Fire Nation! She was meant to be an example to the people of her country! Thoughts like that could be misconstrued as treason, easily! Her thoughts of unfairness or uncertainty… No! She could never. She wasn't some deserter.

"What do you want to hear, Zuko?" Azula demanded, her voice cracking a little. She wanted to scream. She wrenched her wrist from him. She turned away. She crossed her arms over her chest and wound them tightly together. "Do you want to hear about how awful this is for me? Do you want me to cry about it? Do you want me to denounce the Fire Nation?" Now that she had begun speaking, the words spilled out easily, humiliating and disgraceful. Her stomach turned in anxiety and agitation as her nails dug into her upper arms. "Of course — of course I feel hurt! Do you think I want to spend weeks and months chasing around that foolish child all over the world? There are so many other important things that I could be doing with my time. I don't deserve to be stuck out here with nothing! For Agni's sake, I led the coup to overtake Ba Sing Se! It isn't fair! I don't understand why he would just throw me away like this, after all that I've done! After how useful I've been! I don't — "

She stopped talking abruptly, shaking her head. Enough of that, she chided herself, a bit embarrassed with her own admissions. There was no reason to spill out all those messy thoughts. She ought to be ashamed of herself. Zuko ought to be ashamed of himself, coaxing her toward it. She could not say that she felt hurt by the Fire Lord! She would give nothing permission to hurt her. She was stronger than that. If the Fire Lord heard her say something like 'Father hurt my feelings'? Oh gods, it was embarrassing even to think about it. Azula shook her head again, attempting to shake away the fog that seemed to be transferring itself from the atmosphere into her mind. She was not thinking clearly. It was this damn air territory atmosphere. She looked back at her brother.

There was a little wrinkle in the middle of his brow. It was almost like sadness… Or perhaps, some kind of pity.

Azula cleared her throat, determined to fully compose herself. To regain her image. To reclaim the thoughts that she was supposed to have. She was not some kind of pathetic peasant. She should not be someone who invited pity. She was a princess of the greatest nation on the planet, and she would comport herself as such.

"Azula," he started. "I didn't — "

"No," she cut him off, her throat hurting. "It doesn't matter how I feel. My feelings don't matter, as long as I do what I've been told. It only matters how I act. True loyalty is when you keep on doing what is best, even if you have little doubts. Remember that." She huffed, pacing the ground in front of him as she went on. Don't look at me, she wanted to yell, but she knew that would be counter-productive. She had begun this discussion to find more information on what he had been dwelling on. Not to talk about her feelings! She had to get his attention off of herself; she had to bring it back to him and his shameful ideas. He was the one who had let his hurt manifest in misguided ideas. She had not allowed her hurt to turn into anything. She had let her hurt fade into nothingness; that's what you were supposed to do. He was trying to distract her from addressing his own awful thoughts!

"This is about you, not me. And you obviously need a lesson on what it means to be a loyal citizen of your country," Azula said sharply. "No matter how much Father has hurt me or you, I would never abandon my nation. I wouldn't dream of even considering such a thing. Thoughts like that are the beginnings of total disloyalty. You — you can't think about stuff like that, Zuko!"

Zuko put his hand to his chest, gesturing to himself. "You don't understand what I've been through. You don't — "

"That's no excuse," she interjected. She stopped her pacing and set her fists on her hips, shaking her head. "It's one thing to admit to pain and frustration, but you… You know what the penalty for such treason could be! You're on such thin ice with Father already. You can't afford any more mistakes."

"Okay, Azula," he grumbled. "I get it."

She paused. There had been an edge to his voice. Of hurt, of irritation… Of disappointment? She had told him explicitly that maybe she could help him with his tumultuous thoughts… But she had not helped. She had not offered advice, she had not offered comfort. She had only offered his guilt to him. She had only reminded him of his disgrace. And when confronted, she had let her own words spill out of her in a foolish, emotional ramble. She wanted to start over. She took a breath, shaking her head.

"I'm just trying to help you." Azula said, though she was certain that it was too late to rectify the bitterness that she had stirred in him. "You have to remain focused. You cannot let ideas like that distract you. I just – I hate to think what could happen to you if the wrong person heard you talking like that."

"You're right," Zuko murmured, his hands back in his pockets. He turned and began walking slowly up the pathway again. "I don't want the wrong person to hear me."

She defended herself. "I'm looking out for you! The Fire Lord will kill you at your next mistake. I don't want – "

He waved his hand in dismissal. "Don't act like you care. Isn't that like a fantasy of yours? The Fire Lord tries me for treason, I die a gruesome death, and you ascend the throne. It's like everything you've ever wanted."

Azula scoffed, feeling strangely abashed. "Don't be ridiculous."

Zuko walked ahead of her in silence. He passed over the stone that she had last kicked, leaving it stranded in the middle of the walkway.

They did not kick anymore rocks.


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Azula stood at the entrance to the thick forest, where the trees began to grow closer and closer to each other. They were about to enter another phase of difficulty in these Air Nomad mountains, as they would soon have to traverse the woods.

But first, it was time for a break.

Azula tried to seek out a place to sit that had grass on it, for maximum softness. She pressed her toe into the dirt, looking for the best spot. None of it seemed comfortable. The earth was firm and unyielding. The ground should at least be a little comfortable, if there was grass on it.

They were quiet.

Zuko leaned his shoulder against the trunk of a tree, supporting himself on it with his arms crossed over his chest. He was just a few feet away, but from the stillness of him, they might as well have been miles and miles apart.

Before this break, it had not felt like he was willfully ignoring her again, since they were so active that it was easy to concentrate on walking and moving, but… They had not been talking. She had not addressed him since they had spoken of his disloyal thoughts, and he had not addressed her. It had been hours and hours at this point. And now, they were both standing here in this quiet with nothing else to focus on. It made everything feel more oppressive.

It was clear that he was still upset about their conversation. Frankly, she was annoyed with it as well. It had not gone the way that she had intended, not at all. When she had told him that this mission would be worth it in the end, he was supposed to say: Yes, you're right, Azula. That should have been the end of it. It should have been a positive interaction. Zuko never did things the way that he was supposed to. She had meant for them to have a good exchange. She had intended to honor the fact that they had a truce. He was not supposed to confess that he had considered leaving their nation. He was not supposed to confront her hurt feelings. Seriously!

Azula focused on prodding the hard ground in search of a decent place to sit. It had probably been unnecessary to lecture him on his loyalty, she thought. Zuko knew that what he was thinking was inappropriate. Why else would he have been so hesitant to speak of it in the first place? It had been unnecessary to dwell on what might happen if someone overheard that sort of talk. There was nobody here. They were not in the Fire Nation. They were in the neglected, overgrown Air Nomad territory. The Fire Lord would never have the opportunity to hear any of this, if neither of them ever spoke of it. She had an image to uphold, and she had been upholding it for so long that it was difficult to push past that. But she supposed that her reputation as a princess of the greatest nation on the planet hardly mattered if there was literally no one else around. Perhaps she did not have to uphold that image so rigidly if it was just Zuko with her.

Azula withdrew the canteen from the bag, sipping at it for probably longer than she ought to. Slowly, she approached her brother, tapping her fingernails on the outside of the container. He looked at her from the corners of his eyes, inscrutable. She extended the water to him, the barest of peace offerings. Zuko kept his arms tightly wound over his heart. He shook his head, a quick, jerking motion.

Azula frowned. There was no way that he was not thirsty. In this humidity? After all of this exertion? With all of their traveling? No. He was refusing her just for the sake of refusal. He was being dramatic.

"There's no need to be so stubborn," she told him. "You really ought to take some."

"No," he said darkly.

Azula took the canteen back, keeping it close. She considered forcing it at him, but she imagined that he would fight against it. She did not want to take the chance of the water spilling. It was not her fault if he wanted to make stupid, self-destructive decisions. It was not her fault if he was letting frustration get the better of him. Even if she was the root cause of it…

There was no place on the hard ground that seemed adequate for rest. She stood in place, looking out at the vastness of this foggy airbender wasteland. She wondered just how deep into the Air Nomad territory they had actually traveled. With the fog and inconsistent forestation everywhere, it was difficult to tell exactly how far they had come, or what exactly they were headed toward. What if they were going in circles? How much longer would it be until they actually found something of value? How far would they have to walk and climb until they came upon success? It was dusk. It had already been a few days of travel. Would it be a few more days, then? Would it be a week? A month? Three years?

She shuddered to imagine three years out here in this wilderness.

The silence was as prickly and uncomfortable as this awful terrain.

This tension was her fault, all of it. A twinge of self-reproach fluttered through her mind. Instead of listening to him, as she had told him she would, she had rejected his thoughts as being something that they ought to not discuss. She had berated him on the ramifications of his words. He had trusted her with a piece of information, and for the second time now, she had reinforced to him the idea that she was untrustworthy. The idea that she was a mean, unreliable person. That she was the wrong person to talk to. He was never going to tell her anything again, after this. But not only had she lost a potential source of information… She had shaken something apart in their team. They had been getting along, and she had shut that down. She remembered his words: This is just between us. It had been sweet and unexpected and like he was truly willing to help her deal with the difficulty of all of this. Like he didn't even care about gaining the information for future reference. Like he really was her friend. And she had shoved it all away. She had shown him that she really was the wrong person to trust. She did not want to be the wrong person.

She had to rectify this. This strain was not sustainable. She had to at least try. She felt sweat prickling down her neck. The air was so humid and heavy here. The ground was so unyielding and jagged. Was there a single redeeming quality about this place?

Azula pressed her heel into the dirt, halfheartedly continuing to seek a good place to sit. "It must be challenging to be banished for three years and finally return home," she murmured, in an attempt to empathize. "Only to be banished again in the next few months."

Zuko scowled. "I don't expect someone like you to understand what I'm going through."

She pressed her lips together into a thin line, the aggravation bleeding out in spite of her effort to the contrary. "I am being sincere, for your information."

He seemed to falter slightly at her lack of confrontation. "Oh."

There was an uneasy pause.

She was not sure how to best address this. She had not technically done anything wrong. It was not wrong to shame someone for considering defection. It was not wrong to smother her feelings away. It was not wrong to remind him of what was at stake here. Maybe she had been a bit forceful with it, but she was not going to apologize for trying to keep him focused on what was important. The primary thing that she regretted about their discussion was the bitterness that had been brought to the surface. Maybe there had been a better way to handle his doubts.

Azula sighed. "You know, none of this is easy for me."

"Do you think it's easy for me?"

"Well, no," she answered. "But you handle it well. You're so resilient."

He swallowed visibly, but he said nothing. Maybe he did not know what to say. She had not fully considered that sentence before she had spoken it. She noticed how his frown had become fainter. It was not often that she gave him an honest compliment. She felt an unusual, self-conscious pang in her gut. It was odd.

"Listen, Zuko," Azula told him, cautiously choosing her words. "I didn't mean to upset you. Honestly. But the Fire Nation matters more to me than anything else. As it should." She saw him lower his eyes, as though he was being reprimanded. She did not want him to think that. She wasn't trying to scold him; she was trying to strengthen his resolve, so he would not allow renegade thoughts to get in his way. Why couldn't this be easy? Why couldn't he just feel her intentions?

"I want what is best for our country, Azula," he said stiffly. "I mean that."

"Then we're on the same page," she said. "Right?"

"Yeah. We are."

She squinted, scrutinizing him. His level of determination still sounded unclear to her. He needed to channel the persistence that he had shown when he was sacrificing his sleep. When he was refusing breaks to continue forward. When he was climbing mountains and pushing himself through aches and exhaustion. He was such a hard worker, she thought grudgingly. That was an asset to him. To their team. To their mission.

She lowered her voice, hushed, like a secret. "You have such potential," she said. "I would hate to see it wasted."

His frown had changed, from something that was irritated, to something that was thoughtful and quiet. She saw his jaw move wordlessly as he appeared to ruminate on her words. Azula tapped her fingertips along the edges of the container in her hands. Maybe this conflict was not completely resolved, but she could sense improvement, at least.

"I don't want you to allow any of this to get in the way of a successful mission," Azula added. "I don't want to see anything slow you down."

Zuko's voice was strong when he spoke again. "I'm not letting anything slow me down."

"Good," she said. That sounded better. That was what she wanted to hear. She tapped the canteen against his bent elbow.

He took the water.


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And then, something exciting happened at dusk.

The area was full of thick trees that were so tall that the sky was obscured from view. Azula was leading the way forward when she noticed that the fog felt strange. Something was different about this place. For lack of a better word, it seemed as though the aura had changed. Ty Lee might have been proud of her for detecting it, she thought. Perhaps this area used to be a spiritual place for the airbenders. The clouds seemed to be thinning; they must be getting closer to the top of the mountains. Maybe that was part of the reason that the atmosphere felt different.

Up ahead through the forestation, Azula could see that there was a clearing where the ground turned from earth to stone tiles. There was a pillar from some old Air Nomad Avatar nearby, with moss growing all over the sides of it, and there was gravel all along the edges of the clearing.

And, strangely…

There appeared to be an old man sitting right in the middle of it.

Why would there be a strange, elderly person sitting in the middle of Air Nomad territory?

Azula paused, laying her hand on a thick tree. She stood partially obscured by the trunk, staring at this unexpected development.

There really was an old man sitting in the clearing. This was not a hallucination. He had a long, white beard, and he was dressed in yellow rags. So, not only was he ancient, he was also a poor, filthy peasant on top of it.

The man was meditating.

Azula squinted, her mind spinning.

This area of the world was uninhabited. It was supposed to be completely deserted. The people who had lived here had been killed off a hundred years ago. There was no reason for anyone unconnected to the airbenders to be here. And to be meditating here? The strangeness of the situation set off multiple warning bells in her head. It was not just in the aura of the thinning fog. There was something going on here.

They should observe the situation for a little while. This was not the person they were looking for, but it felt significant nonetheless. They should carefully consider what they might ask this stranger. The man looked old enough to have been alive during the Air Nomad eradication. Could he even be an airbender? They ought to tread with caution. It was important to never underestimate anyone, no matter their age or their apparent fragility.

She crouched down behind the trunk of the tree, peering outward.

She heard a slight rustle as Zuko continued to walk forward through the trees, and with a jolt of alarm, Azula realized that he was going to walk right up to that old man and probably confront him. With not a single plan or consultation with her about what he would say. He was obviously not thinking clearly. This situation was too delicate to just go blundering in without at least calculating some of what they would say first.

Azula reached out and grabbed Zuko's hand, yanking it to keep him back. She tugged him toward the tree trunk that she had been crouched behind, a few paces back, so he wasn't just standing there in between the trees for the stranger to see. Zuko spared her an annoyed look, and she shook her head at him. He gestured to the geriatric, raising his brow. Aren't we going to talk to him? Azula held up an index finger, a gesture to wait. Just be patient. He could ruin all of this by storming through without considering the details. It wasn't as though they were going to stay here, observing forever. If the Avatar was nearby, they did not want to frighten him away before they even had the opportunity to attack. If the Avatar came this way, and heard Zuko speaking to this old man, then he would probably turn around and fly away somewhere else. It was not a far-fetched thought. Surely by now the Avatar knew Zuko's voice.

Zuko made a face at her, pulling his hand away. But grudgingly, he crouched down near her. Satisfied, Azula looked back to the old man in the clearing.

The man did not appear to notice the slight sounds that their movements had caused. He continued to meditate in silence. Just sitting there, quiet in this abandoned place. Maybe he just wanted to be closer to the spirits. But that couldn't be it; if that was his purpose, why not go somewhere more easily accessible? Why climb to the top of an abandoned airbender mountain? It was almost like he was…

He was waiting for someone.

Someone who would be willing to scale the narrow, treacherous Air Nomad mountains.

Someone who would prefer to meet in a remote location like this, if they were on the run.

Someone who could just fly up here without any significant effort.

Someone like the Avatar.

That had to be it. He was waiting for the Avatar. He had to be. A decrepit old person, sitting amidst the place where the Air Nomads used to live? He probably had some kind of connection to them. He probably had intentions to teach the Avatar some special airbending trick. Or worse… Maybe he was going to teach the Avatar some sort of ancient skill that would destroy the expansion of the Fire Nation once and for all!

The old man must have met recently with the Avatar. There was a spot across from where he was meditating where the earth appeared flatter, like someone had been sitting there, meditating with him. It could have been up to a few days ago, but it could not have been any more than that. The Avatar had been here recently. The Avatar was probably still here, somewhere nearby. And this old man was waiting for him. A pang of excitement trickled through her veins. Today could be the day, she thought. No. Today would be the day. They just had to wait for the right moment. The Avatar would arrive here. She was certain of it. She set her bag down by the tree. She would be prepared for anything at any time.

A moment passed in the quiet before Azula felt Zuko shifting to stand. She wanted to smack him; didn't he see that she was trying to observe their surroundings? But doing something like that would obviously draw the old man's attention, so instead, she grabbed Zuko's upper arm, intending now to keep hold of him until the time was just right. She squeezed his arm, determined for him to understand the value of a proper stake-out.

"This is pointless," Zuko whispered. "We — "

Without removing her eyes from the old man, Azula shoved her index finger into his face, squashing his nose and mouth. "Shh!"

He made a quiet sound of indignation, jerking his head away from her. "Cut that out!"

"Don't be a fool, then," Azula retorted, casting him a brief glare before looking back into the clearing. She withdrew her shushing gesture, but she did not release his arm. There was no way that the old man had not heard something. But he was not reacting to it at all. Could be truly not hear them? Perhaps the old man was deaf. He certainly was ancient enough for his senses to begin disfunctioning. Or perhaps only the rustling of the leaves carried over to him, and he mistook it for wildlife? Or… Perhaps he was just ignoring them in favor of his meditation.

Zuko leaned toward her, lowering his voice. "We won't find out anything just sitting here," he pointed out. "We have to confront him."

"I think he's waiting for the Avatar," she told him. "We have to plan this carefully."

"That's all the more reason to talk to him!"

"Shh." She scowled, watching the target carefully. They had to talk to him. Of course they did. But Zuko? She could not give the task of questioning this man to Zuko. Zuko might miss important subtleties in the man's body language. He might not catch important non-verbal cues. The old man might attack him, and Zuko might not be prepared enough for it. She was better with interrogation and unexpected assaults. She ought to be the one to question the man. "I'll talk to him."

"Okay," Zuko said. "Well, then what should I do? I could — I'll search this area."

"No." Azula shook her head once. Zuko could not be tasked to search this place! He might miss small details. He might not notice footprints. He might disregard shifted leaves or broken branches. He had never had an eye for little details, and those were crucial for tracking. No, she would be better suited for looking for small clues like that. "No, I will search the area."

He clicked his tongue in exasperation. "Well, what do you want me to do, then?"

She didn't answer. What could he do? He could… Accompany her while she searched and while she interrogated? They could stay together while canvassing the area. That way, he would not be out of her sight, and she could correct any moments of ineptitude as they arose. But that was time that could be used more efficiently.

Truthfully, it would be a better use of their time and effort if they split apart at this crucial point. They had split apart before in the poor desert town, and in that abandoned plains village. That had worked out fine. But then… This was much more critical than splitting apart for the sake of gathering supplies. This was a search for the Avatar while she knew that he was near.

Zuko began to pry at her fingers. She must have been still for too long. "I'm going over," he said. "You don't have to come."

Azula pressed her nails into his bicep, keeping him still. "You stay here," she told him. "This is important."

"I can do important things," he snapped back, his tone rising a little.

"Shh!" She gnawed at the inside of her lip where the anxiety would remain invisible. It would be better for him to do one of those tasks; she could not do them both at the same time, no matter how better suited she was to them.

"Let go of me." He was still digging at her fingers. It was beginning to hurt. She knew that she would have to release some of the control over this to him. She was going to have to give him one of these tasks, even though it was an important matter. She could not contain all the responsibility, all of the decisive actions, all of her thoughts… She did not have to do everything. Zuko was here and capable. He would take it seriously. He knew how significant this might be. She remembered how seriously he had taken the task of writing their letter home. Maybe he could do this too.

"Okay," Azula whispered, her heart rate feeling slightly irregular. "Okay, fine. We'll do it your way. You go talk to the man. I'll circle the area and see if I find anything, and then I will come back to you and him. In the meantime, you send up a flare if you need me. I will send one up if I need you. If you see a flare, you come immediately. I will do the same. No matter what. Understand?"

"I understand." Zuko nodded in assent. He made a motion to stand, and she squeezed his arm a final time, looking right at his face. She wanted to tell him to repeat the instructions to her, to make sure that he really, really understood. She wanted to remind him that this was important. This could make or break their success, if that man knew where the Avatar was, if he had a connection to him. She wanted to tell him that he had better think before he acted. He had better not mess this up! He wouldn't mess it up, right? He had done a good job with their letter, in spite of her reservations. She wet her lips. He could do this well, too. He knew what might be at stake. Hopefully… "What is it now, Azula?"

Azula swallowed. "Good luck," she said.

His mouth moved just slightly. He had almost smiled. "You, too."

She released his arm, and he left.


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The most special of thanks to Aurelia le for beta-reading! I could not possibly thank you enough! :)

Hey, if you guys want to give me a gift this holiday season, my love language is Words of Affirmation… Hint, hint, wink, wink. Please leave a review! :D

Happy New Year, everyone! Adventures await. :)