It'd been a long while before Lexie was on my service again. It was a busy week, I'd been operating so much, I had no idea when I'd finally catch a break. But I finally did. Amidst the array of surgeries, it had finally settled down. Karev was doing exceptionally well, but he'd decided to change it up after this week. I'm sure he saw that I was getting frustrated over the lack of sleep - and I hadn't seen Lexie in such a long time, so that further frustrated me. I don't know why, I supposed I just missed her company.

I directed my anger towards him, thus he needed a well-deserved break from me. I guess I don't blame him. During moments of solitude, I often wondered what Lexie was doing, how she'd been performing under Shepherd's service. She definitely had a thing for Neuro, I could see it. But I also saw that charming behavior exemplified in Paeds - just from the way she spoke to the patients and the parents, smiling with such genuinity.

There was something so different about her. I must have thought I was fascinated because she was different from Callie. I hadn't been with a younger woman for a while - not since before Callie. Callie had at once seemed to be my world, and now she's hardly anything to me anymore. Perhaps those are strong words, but her presence doesn't linger as much as it had when I'd left her for Africa.

A flicker of the past, she must have been. When I passed her in the hallways, we'd look at each other - wanting to say something. To at least apologize, I thought. Apologize for the things we let pass by, apologize for not being able to forgive, for not loving enough, for not trying harder to be more than what we appeared to be.

I found myself thinking about that when I passed by her, or when I'd remember that I needed to get my boxes out of that apartment. Something inside of me kept them there - maybe it's because I wanted to say something as she passed me in the halls, watching me sadly.

I must have been broken, I thought - but then I see Lexie and it's like my mind completely shuts everything else out. When I see her in front of me, something becomes real - I don't quite know what, but there's something there. When I see her, I feel my heart almost lifting from that dismal pain that relapses at times.

She talks too much, she's ranty and timid. But she's so expressive and real - unlike myself. I am able to suppress what I feel - it's self-control, isn't it?

And I find myself wanting her. Wanting to touch her, wanting to feel her against me. I loved the way she would look at me with her sensuous eyes, half-opened and wanting more. Her gasps, her moans, her whimpers - they echoed in my head when she wasn't around me.

But now my frustration was becoming latent. Lexie was starting to resist me, and I had no idea why. And it was incredibly disheartening. She was on my service again, finally - yet, she was resisting me.

We'd been at it for weeks - I pushed her hard against Meredith's living room table a few days ago because I hadn't seen her in so long. I'd only catch a glimpse of her as I headed down to the OR or walked down the hall for something. I wondered if she was upset because of my refusal to stay the night. I made the excuse that it wasn't her house and then she'd said she would have asked Meredith, but it just seemed silly. So I refused and left and now she was resisting me, though she was back on my service.

"No, Arizona," she said, pushing my hand away from her cheek.

I'd paged her for a few scans and then I pulled her into an on-call room. And then I felt her pull away slightly as I pulled on her wrist and pushed her against the door, making it shut. I didn't want to come off too strong, and I began to wonder why she'd begun to refuse me.

She looked into my eyes for a moment, and I couldn't tell what was written in her own. She seemed irritated at me, so she brushed off my hand from her cheek before I could kiss her and pulled herself away from me, telling me she'd go get the scans right away. She had left me in that on-call room alone and I stood there in silence.

She hadn't shown up at my hotel that night.

Then something had changed, because she would brush up against me or linger by my side for a moment. She'd lean over my shoulder and into me as I'd sit there, reading scans or checking the computer at the Nurses' station. I'd smell her, an intoxicating smell - and then she'd be gone before I knew it.

I finally understood when we'd gotten onto the elevator. I couldn't exactly confront her because Meredith had gotten on, as well. I pressed the floor that I was heading to, but then she'd reach in and press another button at the same time, her hand brushing up against mine. She'd caught my attention fully then, and I'd look at her and she'd look straight back at me - her deep brown eyes glowing.

She'd been teasing me. Perhaps it was retribution for all I'd done, but I hadn't teased her and left her as much as she did to me. I'd tease her until she told me what she wanted and then I'd-

And then I realized that she wanted me to want her the same way I'd done with her.

It felt like a silly game for a moment, like she was trying to upscore me or something. But then I realized how badly I wanted it, especially when I felt her hand graze against my own, or those brown strands of hair cascading over my shoulder as she leant over me.

I don't know why I wanted her to touch me. It turns into something more once the feelings are reciprocated - once the touching is exchanged. But god, I really wanted Lexie Grey to touch me.

So I texted her to meet me in an on-call room and she entered and asked me if everything was okay with the post-ops she'd been assigned to.

"It's fine," I muttered.

She looked at me for a moment and then turned to go, "Okay, then I'll be-"

"Wait," I interjected.

"Tell me what you're thinking."

She turned to look at me, her face scrunched up in a frown. Why did she look amazing even when frustrated? I suppose we all praise those we sleep with in the moment.

"I want to touch you," she told me.

I expected it, and it seemed she expected that I knew.

"But you won't let me," she continued.

Her gaze fell to her feet once again, and she shifted them in her usual way. Suddenly, she looked up at me, worried as though she'd offended me. As if I were angry, I thought.

"S-sorry," she murmured, and turned around to go. I quickly grabbed her hand and pulled her back to the desk just beside the bed. I moved the chair and pushed her against the desk and leaned into her.

She didn't touch me, she hadn't moved at all - her hands were gripping the desk as I leaned into her, just lightly grazing my lips against her neck and up to her ear.

"Touch me, Grey," I whispered.

She suddenly grabbed my face and pulled me to her and kissed me very roughly. I hadn't expected it to be that intense, and I felt my knees almost weaken. She grabbed at my lab coat, pulling it off me, yet not releasing my lips.

We hadn't kissed all week, I thought - and I supposed she thought that too because as soon as my scrub shirt was off, her lips were back on mine. She forced her tongue into my mouth and dug her nails into my back before unhooking my bra and flinging it off of my arms.

She touched my breasts very gently, not teasingly - but rather inquisitively. She was discovering my body, I thought as she circled her fingers around my nipples. She pinched them very lightly and moved her head down to my breasts - nibbling, licking, sucking.

I felt my knees start to shake as I gripped her hair. She moved back up and kissed me again and then looked up at me with dark, smouldering eyes.

"I want to taste you," she told me.

I watched her - my eyes giving her the confirmation that she wanted and she suddenly became very dominant, very sensual. I felt her fingertips lightly trace circles around my stomach and my sides.

"A-Are you sure you want to?" I whispered to her, feeling suddenly embarrassed as she tugged off my pants. She pushed me lightly back on the chair, so I was sitting up and then she crouched down to me, gently placing her hands on my knees.

"I couldn't be more sure," she told me, looking up at me. And the intensity of her eyes seemed to paralyze me for a moment. My heartbeat started to speed up, I could feel it in my chest.

She slipped off my panties and then stood up again and straddled my hips. She placed her hands on shoulders and just looked at me, and I thought that maybe she had changed her mind, but then she lightly wrapped her arms around my neck and leant down to kiss me.

Loose strands of brown hair fell over my cheeks and onto my shoulders as she slipped her tongue back into my mouth - and I felt overwhelmed - everything was suddenly Lexie. The smell, the feel, the taste.

She kissed me lightly one last time and looked into my eyes. She smiled and kissed down my neck and then got on her knees.

"Can you spread your legs?" she asked me.

So I did.

"You've never done this.." I started to say, but my own gasp cut my words short, because then, I felt her hot breath against me. I felt the wetness trickle down my thigh as her continued hot breaths (which were so close), only seemed to make my legs tremble.

She seemed to be taking in my scent, or something, because she looked at me very inquisitively, curiously. I really thought she'd stop this time, but then she spoke and it felt as though I would just melt into her light touches.

"You showed me how," she husked and then I looked down at her as she stared back up at me, burying her head between my legs. I felt myself shudder as she finally put her hot mouth on me and met my gaze with those lovely, curious eyes of hers.

I felt her lightly lick me - sampling, maybe - or even savouring. She lightly stroked my slit with her tongue, finding the places that made my legs tremble more. I pushed my lips closer to her mouth, leaning back on the chair so that she could position herself better.

I'd give her it, if she wanted it.

"God, Lexie. I want you," I whispered, and then I felt her sigh against me before lightly tracing my clit. Her tongue moved in all sorts of patterns (at one point, I thought she was tracing her name) attempting to find what made me moan for her.

I gasped as Lexie sucked my clit into her mouth, licking it with her tongue. I suddenly felt very sensitive, I could feel my body heat up uncontrollably and I felt my hips start to quiver. She held me down and in place, she refused to be stopped.

I finally came, hard. And I caught my breath while she crawled back up my body and straddled my thighs again.

"You taste good," she whispered, looking into my eyes and kissing me harshly

"You're so rough, Grey," I told her.

"You love it."

And I had to laugh because it was true. I loved it all, really.