Dear Readers,

Our couple's journey continues. This chapter deals with Kate's insecurities and introduce Dr Burke. I believe we needed to include him as he is important to our story. But, rest assured, more fun will be coming, the next chapter finds our couple in the Hamptons. Please review, your comments help.

My three-Betas-Bree, Marjo, and Stella- you make my story better and you inspire me to continue, XXOO

As Kate opened her eyes, she was relieved to find that Castle was not beside her. She'd had yet another disturbing dream. Nightmares were not new for Kate, they had been a routine occurrence since the shooting. Recently though, they had become more frequent and disturbing, revolving around her relationship with Castle. Each dream ended similarly, upon confessing her indiscretions of the previous summer, Castle's response was anger, stating her actions were inexcusable, and ending with him leaving her. Even though she wanted to believe in her heart he wouldn't leave her, these dreams raised doubts, leaving her unsettled. This morning's nightmare had been particularly bad, and it had left her shaking and in tears. The lingering insecurity was still with her as she entered the kitchen.

Castle was busy preparing breakfast when two arms came around his waist, "What's for breakfast?" Kate murmured into his back.

"Hey, sleepy head, just waiting to see what sounds good" he rubbed her arms, and the touch of her skin made him tingle.

"I suppose a latte and bear claw aren't on the menu?" she teased Castle, waiting for his reaction.

"No, remember it's time to eat better and gain weight." Castle not taking on her challenge.

"What am I, the thanksgiving turkey? Fattening me up for the kill, huh?" Kate joked with her partner as she tried to annoy him.

As he turned around, Castle reached down, lifting up Kate's face and his lips found hers open and waiting. Their kiss lingered and both became lost in the moment.

"So, Dad, I need to get ready to go to school, can I eat first?" Alexis laughed at the couple as she came into the kitchen.

Castle and Kate parted, and he moved to hug his daughter. Alexis loved that her Dad and Kate were comfortable demonstrating their mutual affection in front of her and her grandmother. They seemed so happy together, despite the drama of recent events.

"Lex, you want a latte?" Kate asked as she gravitated toward the espresso machine.

"Sure," since Kate hated making lattes, both Alexis and Rick were surprised she had volunteered. They watched as she put the ground beans in the barista bowl and then tried to lock it in place. The combination of her lack of strength and inability to lock the bowl in place caused her to frown and she bit her lip in frustration.

Damn it, why do I let this thing get to me? She shook her head, but knew her frustration had little to do with the machine. Castle nudged Alexis, and nodded his head in Kate's direction

"Here let me, this thing is horrible. I keep asking Dad for a replacement, but he says it's a classic." Both women rolled their eyes in sync and laughed. Castle was enthralled as he watched them. He realized he and Kate would face many obstacles, their relationship would be tested, but knew it would be worth the journey.

Rick made them all a vegetarian omelette and fried some bacon, commenting that man needs meat, which brought chortles from both Alexis and Kate. Determined to be part of the morning's meal preparation, Kate had spent her time chopping veggies and setting the table, tired of being an invalid. Initially, Castle was hesitant about Kate exerting so much energy, but decided to let her test her capabilities. He understood she was discouraged with her seeming lack of progress, and that she wanted things to go back to normal - with her back at work in the precinct and in control of her emotions.

During breakfast, they discussed their plans for the day. First topic of discussion was their appointment with Dr Burke, and just bringing it up filled Kate with alarm Her time with Dr Burke had been her sanctuary, he had brought her through a very painful period in her life and was helping her regain her self-worth. Suddenly, she was overrun with the realization that today she would be sharing him with Castle.

Castle could tell that Kate had gotten lost in her thoughts. He reached over and rubbed his fingertips on her arm. "Where did you go?" he asked softly.

"What?", replied Kate, returning to the moment.

"You left. Where did you go?".

She frowned, Castle's uncanny ability to sense her mood unnerving her. She shrugged her shoulders, "Leave it alone, Rick", immediately regretting her impatient tone. The morning's activities had taken their toll, she had pushed too hard and now she paid the price. Kate felt her temperature rise as the pain in her side started. She was exhausted by this pattern of illness and knew she had to learn to work within her limitations.

"Rick, I'm sorry. You didn't deserve that." Kate bit her lip. "I-I overdid it this morning. and I need to lay down."

"Well, we have some time before our appointment, why don't you take some medicine and rest for a while." Castle had suspected she had worn herself out, but was smart enough to know if he scolded her, she would just lash out, so he remained silent.

Already curled up on the couch, Kate felt herself drift off as Rick began to massage her feet. Early in their relationship, he had learned how much she enjoyed this and how relaxed it made her.

Nearly two hours later, Kate felt his lips on her forehead. "What time is it?" she asked.

"Time to wake up. I want you sharp for our appointment." He smiled at Kate, but she didn't respond. She had experienced another bad dream.

"I'll be fine, give me a minute." Her voice was harsh and her face set in a scowl.

"Need any help?" He asked.

"No, I've got this", her tone short as she tried to block the dream from her thoughts. She regretted asking Castle to join her at Dr Burke's office. Why introduce Castle into the fray and expose him to her issues?

Castle watched her go into the bedroom, pondering Kate's attitude. It had changed; she was so sullen and distant. Had he missed something? She had been fine at breakfast, then had worn herself out. Could that be it? No, he suspected that she had reverted back to her stubborn ways because she felt vulnerable.

Castle stood at the window for a couple of minutes then decided he was going to talk to her about her behaviour. As he walked into the bedroom, he noticed her sitting on the edge of the bed, wearing the same clothes she'd had on earlier. He sat down next to his partner, leaning in and attempting to kiss her neck. Kate moved away to elude his touch. "I'll be ready in a minute." she said curtly. Kate moved to stand, but Castle's grip on her arm prevented any movement.

"What are you trying to do?"

"Nothing, let me get ready," she stated as she evaded looking at him.

"Kate, you're not going to get away with this. You need to talk to me," he implored her.

"Let me go!" Kate said agitated, feeling trapped.

"No!"

"Quit prying, Castle." His persistence flustered her.

"Well, we seem to have digressed, Detective Beckett." Castle's agitation now matched Kate's.

"Stop it, you don't know me. You think you do, but you don't. This isn't right., I don't want to open up to Dr Burke and you. I'm not sure us being together is going to work."

'Oh, no, you are not going to escape that easy." Castles grip on her arm tightened.

"What about everything we've talked about? What you promised?" Castle was now starting to panic.

"I was hasty, I'm not ready for a committed relationship.". Kate licked her lips, trying to escape, "I'm leaving."

Castle stood and pulled Kate tightly into his grasp. "Look at me", his voice raw, "I said look at me."

Slowly, she looked towards him, but she avoided eye contact. She knew her resolve would wilt once she gazed into his eyes. Castle was having none of her nonsense and forced her head towards his. She'd closed her eyes and he detected a tremor through her body as she fought his grip.

"Open your eyes now!" he demanded.

Her eyes remained closed as she tried to escape, but Castle had no intention of letting her go. His lips crashed into hers and worked to open her mouth. She fought his advances with a clenched jaw and teeth. His lips continued to work to break down her defences as he pulled her snug against him and felt her heart racing.

"There is no way, you are leaving. You can't leave, I love you." Castle whispered in her ear as he held her head. These words broke through her wall and Kate fell into him. She clutched his forearms, unable to speak. What was she doing? This man would do anything for her. Why was she fighting him?

"I got scared about today, about you seeing just how damaged I am, and you..." Castle's fingers on her lips stopped her words. How could she express her feelings when she didn't understand them herself.

"Kate, don't do this. Talk to me."

"Castle, I'm so confused. I can't make sense of it."

'First, my name is Rick, and you are not retreating back into your hiding place."

Castle could tell by her stance that he was getting her back up again. His lips found hers, softly this time and his tongue opened her mouth. Kate moaned and began to cry. He felt her tears, which caused his eyes to open.

"Kate open your eyes". As she did what he'd asked, he saw the haunted look he had seen so much of over the last few years. My God, what had happened? He needed to know so he could help her.

"We have to move forward, not backward, those days are gone. Remember you're not the only one with issues. We'll be stronger together. You said you trusted me right?"

"Right, but..."

"No buts, There is nothing that will scare me away. Or are you afraid that in the end that you won't want me?"

Kate looked up quickly, puzzled, how could he think that?

"See, I have insecurities too." Castle's gaze was tender and he ran his fingers from her chin onto her lips. Castle wrapped his arms around her and lowered them both onto the bed.

"Lay with me for a while, we have time," his warmth comforted her. As she buried her head in his shoulder she nodded affirmatively. Her fears began to recede, her mind relaxed and soon she was asleep. Castle didn't move, she needed time to recover. After about an hour, she stirred and kissed his neck.

"I'm feeling better now, thanks."

In the car, she was still withdrawn, but held onto his thigh. She had nearly run again, and Rick was wondering how many times would she be tempted to leave?

Dr Burke greeted them two warmly. He really wanted to help this couple find the happiness they deserved.

"What do you want to talk about?"

Kate looked down, not sure where to start.so Castle started for her.

"We nearly did not make it today. Kate had a panic attack."

"Stop it, Rick. I-I". Her face was drawn and Dr Burke could see the stress on her face. As he explained the ground rules, he watched Kate regroup before they continued .

"What happened today, Kate?" Dr Burke inquired.

"I've had some nightmares...bad dreams."

"Nightmares? Why didn't you say anything to me?" Castle was irritated and Kate glared at him.

"Rick, you need to be quiet and let Kate explain." Dr Burke silenced him.

"Over the last few days, I've had recurring bad dreams. Each time they end with Castle, er, Rick, angry and leaving me." She ran her hands through her hair and rubbed the sides of her face. "In the nightmare, he decided my lying to him was unforgivable and he wasn't willing to deal with my problems. I...I can't go through life with the fear of being abandoned again." With those final words, she looked first at Castle, then at Dr Burke and shrugged her shoulders. Castle's mouth was agape and he couldn't keep quiet any longer.

"Why would you think that? Every day I tell you how important you are to me and what I want for our future." Castle returned Kate's glare with his own.

"Enough, you two!" These two could really push each other's buttons, and their communication skills were horrendous.

"Don't let your fears make you weak. You can't hide or run from your feelings that won't solve anything. It's not fair to either of you, do you understand?" Dr Burke leaned forward and spoke directly to Kate. Her head was bowed, and her shoulders slumped, but she nodded in agreement.

"Rick, I warned you that Kate would be a challenge. You have to decide if she is who you want to be with. Are you committed to Kate, yes or no?"

"I told you, I will do anything to make this work." He turned his head to face Kate as he repeated. "Anything." His face full of love and compassion.

Kate looked up at his face and into his eyes. She leaned towards Castle, had a slight twinge of pain, yet continued to reach for him. Her hand ran down his cheek as she stared into his eyes. A warm gentle smile came onto her face and Castle's heart leapt. This was the first time since the kiss in the precinct that she had publicly shown him any affection. He leaned into her, closing the distance and she did not back away. They kissed with her hand still on his face. She murmured. "I love you, Rick Castle."

The rest of the time passed quickly and soon they bid Dr Burke goodbye. As they were about to leave, Dr Burke made his final point, "You two love each other, and you need to learn to talk to each other honestly."

On the elevator ride down, Kate looked at Castle. He hadn't run away, and she now believed he would stick with her. She shook her head and smiled what a ride they were in for. With that, she pulled him into her, lifted her face and bit his lip.

"Ow, you may regret abusing me, I will get you back." Castle feigned pain.

"I carry a gun."

"Nice try, you're on leave remember, no gun" Castle grinned from ear to ear, he loved when he could out smart her.

"Oh, I won't shoot you, I have other ways." as she glanced sideways at him, raising an eyebrow and winked.

They continue their banter as the doors opened and they exited. They were meeting Kate's Dad Jim, at Remy's for lunch. The plan was to tell Jim what had occurred since Nick's death. Kate was fairly certain that her father knew something was up with the couple, but it was time to share their news.

Kate's dad was already in their favorite booth. As he saw them he rose, shook Castle's hand and hugged Kate. He held her briefly and gently; his daughter was so thin, her face was drawn, and he was instantly concerned. As they waited for their order, Kate began to tell her father everything since Nick's death. He reached across the table, picked up her hand, pulled it to his mouth and gently kissed it.

"Katie, nothing's easy for you, is it?" as he looked into his daughters eyes, then at Castle and he knew that Rick would take care of her.

As they departed, Jim promised to visit them in the Hampton's. Kate grew silent as they neared her apartment. The task of what she should take, what to store and what to dispose of was daunting.

Once they were in her apartment, Kate looked around, unsure of where to start and overcome with weariness. Castle glanced at Kate. Her pallor had returned and her face scrunched as she evaded the throbbing that had re-occurred.

"Kate, I have an idea." Her body was shaking as her head shifted to meet his eyes. Her smile was frail and she was too drained to speak. Castle had become well versed in caring for Kate and lead her to the couch. She sunk down into the cushions grateful that she hadn't collapsed. Castle brought her water and some pills.

"Rick, I really ..."

"Kate, give yourself a break, today has been brutal. Rest awhile then we'll go home." He leaned into her face and kissed her tenderly on the lips. Kate fought to keep her eyes open, she wanted to tell him how much today had meant to her, how his presence made her feel strong again, but her eyes closed before she could speak.

Much later, Kate opened her eyes. Her brain was groggy, she hated how the pills made her feel, but they helped. She sat up, tried to focus her vision and looked for Castle. As she called his name, he appeared by her side.

"Hey, how long was I out this time?"

"Almost five hours, you needed to rest."

"I'll never get this placed packed if I sleep all the time." her voice filled with disgust.

Kate struggled to stand still wobbly from the medicine. She perched on the arm of the couch as her eyesight began to sharpen. She looked around her apartment, most of her things were packed and boxes lined her walls.

"How did this happen?" She asked.

"I called Alexis. She came over and we went through most of what we thought you would want. What we weren't sure of, we left for you to decide." Castle surveyed the room, obviously proud of their work.

Kate was stunned by what they had done. Deliberately, she walked around her apartment and ran her fingers on each box. They had been packed with care and labelled in detail as well as a T for take and S for store on the boxes.

"What about my clothes, my personal stuff, did you do that, or Alexis?" Her face pink with embarrassment.

"We figured I should pack those. Besides, I got to see some very sexy underwear. There is one salmon colored Teddy with French lace that I can't wait to see you model." Castle's eyes narrowed as he leered at Kate with a raised eyebrow. His look brought a deeper flush to Kate's cheeks.

Why Detective, have I made you blush? How delightful."

"Come here, Rick."

As he went to her, Kate wrapped her arms around him, stood on her tiptoes and kissed him tenderly. Once they finished, she gestured around the room

"I'm...This is wonderful. Thank you. Now, let's go home."