I feel so bad about not updating, it's just been one thing after another and I completely forgot ! Anyway here it is ! Sorry x

Chapter 10: Rebecca's POV

"And all I can taste is this moment. And all I can breathe is your life.'Cause sooner or later it's over. I just don't want to miss you tonight." Iris- Goo Goo Dolls.

Everything had been a blank, until now. I slowly started to feel pain, the kind of stiffness you get when you haven't moved in a while. I could hear things around me but couldn't make them out. I was breathing but it took a lot of effort, I knew I had to force myself to do it. I couldn't give up, not now. I started to feel something, my arm was sore yes but there was something else there. My cold fingers suddenly came into contact with something warm; I felt a slight improvement in me, like the warmth brought me strength. My breaths quickened and slowly I tried to open my eyes. The noise around me was getting louder around me and something wet was put on my forehead. My fingers no longer felt numb so I attempted moving them, I squeezed whatever was in my hand. It felt so familiar yet I couldn't make it out. It took all of my willpower to force my eyes open, I couldn't see anything at first, everything was blurry, and I could only make out silhouettes. I began to understand what people were saying, they were telling me to keep going, that I could do it. They sounded desperate, I didn't recognise their voices yet but something told me I should do as they say. My eyes were fully open now and had adjusted to the light. I tried to sit up but I couldn't, someone came up behind me and steadied me in my attempt to sit. I looked around at everyone's expectant faces but nothing would come, no names, no memories, nothing.

"Rebecca." The blond boy in front of me whispered with so much relief I felt bad for not knowing who he was.

He leaned in and touched my lips with his, I didn't understand. Why would he do that? He noticed my discomfort and quickly pulled away. He looked hurt, I wish I knew why.

Suddenly I felt someone bring me into a hug, he was smaller than the other boy, but again I didn't react. I sat there awkwardly wondering what on earth was happening. The boy pulled back, he had a tear stained face that now had confusion written all over it.

"Rebecca, are you alright?" A little girl asked.

They all looked at me expectantly. I didn't understand. Was I this Rebecca they kept on saying?

"Who … who are you?" I croaked.

There was silence in the room. They all looked at each other, the boy who had hugged me held his gaze with the blond one.

"She doesn't even know who we are!" He yelled angrily making me flinch. I didn't know much but I knew for sure I didn't like shouting. "I can't believe you let this happen! I can't believe I trusted you!"

On that note, the young boy threw himself at the other knocking him to the ground. But the blond was still quicker and cushioned their fall before rolling on top of the younger boy to hold him down.

"DO YOU THINK I WANTED THIS TO HAPPEN?" The blond yelled as tears fell. "DO YOU REALLY THINK I WANTED TO LOSE HER WHEN I HAD JUST GOTTEN HER BACK?"

Another two boys ran up and dragged the blond off him. Both of them had dark hair, one had longer hair and wasn't short of handsome.

"What is going on?" I asked.

They all turned to look at me.

"You don't remember anything?" An older girl asked me.

"I have no idea what I'm doing here or who I am." I said. "I know I should but I don't remember."

"Mum, it's me, Archer." The boy who had helped me up said.

"Mum?" How could I be his mum, he looked just a bit younger than myself.

"I'm Lucy." The young girl, who was next to me said. "And you're Rebecca."

So I was Rebecca, I looked at the worried face of the young girl. Lucy, I knew the name … Lucy …

"Queen Lucy!" I suddenly said. "You're one of the kings and queens of old!"

"Yes, that's me." She sighed.

"I didn't know we had met." I told her. "It's a pleasure to meet you Queen Lucy."

"Lu', I think it's time you and Susan left." The blond boy said.

"But…" Queen Lucy began to whine.

"No, the damage has been done; we can't lose any more time."

"So you're giving up?" She said accusingly.

"No, but we need to find Aslan." The blond said.

"Aslan!" I said. "He came to me in a dream I had and said everything will fall into place. And that nothing ever happens the same way twice."

Everyone looked incredulously at me; it was quite horrible to be the centre of attention.

"Lucy, please." The blonde boy pleaded. "It's the only way to end this."

Queen Lucy nodded and suddenly hugged me before hopping off the Stone Table and following the other girl out. The Stone Table, how did I know that?

The good-looking boy followed the girls out, that only left the two boys that had been fighting, another black haired boy, the boy who had mistaken me for his mum, and two other people who hadn't said anything yet: a girl and a dwarf.

"I can't see her like this, I just can't." The younger boy slowly whispered before running out of the room.

The one who had been supporting me took a step back and quickly followed the other. The dwarf looked at the blond, who I guessed was in charge, and asked without words for leave. The boy nodded and the dwarf left with a shaky bow towards me. Only three were left.

"Ed, you don't mind do you?" The boy with the black hair shook his head; his eyes were glazed as he turned to look at me sadly before leaving.

"Lily?" The blond looked at the girl.

"I'm not moving." She said stubbornly.

"Just come here please." He held out his hand to her. She took it but her face showed that she didn't know where this was going.

"Rebecca." The boy slowly said as they both came to sit next to me.

"I don't know who you are." I replied sadly. "I wish I could but I don't."

He looked defeated; he didn't know what to do next. The girl beside him, who I knew was Lily, took over.

"Do you remember Peter?" She asked.

"Peter." I repeated. "I know the name."

"Yes, you married a boy named Peter." She continued.

"I did?"

"Yes you did." I saw her take something from the boy's pocket. "This is yours."

She held out a ring to me, I looked at it, it was beautiful. I had seen it before. I slipped it onto my wedding finger, nearly a perfect fit; it was just a little too big, only just.

"Do you remember the day you got it?" She asked.

I thought hard about it before saying. "I think I do."

The blond looked up at me with hope in his eyes.

"What do you remember?" He asked.

"The promise when I received the ring, it was a sign of faith and commitment."

"These promises I give to you today are for all of the days that follow." The blond boy said, as if remembering. "That was last line of my vows."

"You're Peter?" I asked.

"Yes, I'm Peter." He smiled weakly.

I couldn't remember it, just the name, yet I trusted this boy for some reason.

"I believe you." I said shakily.

"Rebecca Pevensie." He whispered softly.

It was like a slap on the face, everything came back, all the memories with just that one name. I was Rebecca Pevensie, also known as Becca. I had a brother, Oliver. I was a Queen of Narnia, Rebecca the Radiant. I had married the love of my life and together we had had two wonderful children. All of that had been taking away from me until recently when we had been brought back.

"Peter." I finally gasped as I flung myself into his arms, sobbing uncontrollably.

"It's fine, I'm here." He reassured me.

I didn't care that Lily was still in the room, I crashed my lips to his as more and more memories came back, our first fight, our first kiss, our first time, everything, every little detail. How could I ever forget him? Peter was surprised by my forwardness, I decided I really should stop and pulled away breathless. Lily was next to us with wide eyes. I looked at her and in one movement we both brought each other into a hug.

"I'm sorry for being such a bitch." Lily told me as her head rested in the crook of my neck.

"Lily, look at me." I pulled away and looked her right in the eyes. "You had every right to be mad. I know you must've felt like you didn't matter to us but trust me a day never went by without me thinking of you."

"I just sorry I acted like a brat when we first met, and then this happened and I regretted every ounce of it."

"I'm not mad at you." I said as I brought her into another hug.

I felt Peter's arms wrap around us, and his head rested on top of mine and gently placed a kiss there. When we pulled away we all had tears of happiness and relief running down our cheeks.

"Promise me one thing." Lily asked looking at both Peter and me. "Never kiss like that in front of me again." She finished with a small smile.

"We're still hormonal teenagers, remember that." Peter joked.

The atmosphere in the room had become lighter. This was what Peter and I longed for, the chance to just be with each other and talk with Lily. I remember a couple of days after giving birth when I felt like I had had enough of it all. The day had been stressful enough with twins and whatnot so when Peter said he'd have to go to Archenland for a couple of weeks to sort out some treaties I just broke down into sobs and wished I hadn't given birth. Peter took me in his arms and promised me that all of it would get better, that we would get the hang of it and he would be there every step of the way. He ended up cancelling the trip and sent a message saying that his newly borns needed his undivided attention. The King in Archenland understood and sent his best wishes.

"I'm going to go and find Archer." Lily ended up saying. "He might be in a mess."

She then hopped off and walked to the exit. I watched her go; her hair was gently swinging behind her.

"Would you go through it all again?" Peter asked breaking the silence.

"Go through what?" I looked at him in confusion.

"Getting pregnant, having other kids." He clarified.

"I think I would." I admitted.

"I'm glad." He smiled as he gently pressed his lips to mine.

"You want another child?"

"Yeah, I do." Peter confessed. "I want to be able to everything all over again, be there from start to finish."

"Even the sleepless nights?" I joked.

"Yes, even them." He nodded with a slight grin. "We missed out on so much with the twins; I want to be able to experience every stage of them growing up."

"Do you want it for the right reasons then?" I said. "It seems like you just want another child to make amends for all those years we weren't there for Liliana and Archer."

"Of course I want to make amends but I really do want to extend our family. We always talked about it before; before we went back we always talked that maybe one day we'd have another."

I looked down at my hands, I felt guilty, and I knew I should have told him at the time but I wanted to wait for the right moment … but it never came.

"Becca?" Peter lifted my chin with his finger. "What's wrong?"

"I know I should have told you, things would have turned out differently." I told him, not daring to look him right in the eyes.

"Rebecca, what do you mean?" Peter looked worried.

"I was pregnant." I choked out.

"Wait, what?"

"When we left Narnia last time, I was two months pregnant."

"Why didn't you tell me?" He was hurt that much I could tell. "How long had you known?"

"A week, I wanted to but I wanted to wait for the right time!"

"I'm guessing you lost …" He couldn't finish his sentence.

"Yeah, I did."

"I wonder if it was a girl or a boy." Peter was staring at the carving of Aslan as tears pricked his eyes. "Whatever gender, I would have loved it all the same, why did we have to lose it?"

"Peter, I know this is going to sound awful but if my body had kept the pregnancy going I couldn't have coped. You have no idea what would've happened, I was 16. My mum would have freaked and then I would have been put into a situation that would have been unbearable. There is only one way to get pregnant Peter, what would I have said."

"You're saying you were glad it died?" I saw a flash of anger cross his eyes.

"No I'm not; I'm just pointing out that maybe it was for the best." I sighed.

"We can't change it now." Peter exhaled. "Have you ever thought that maybe we are fighting for something we will never get, like all we want is a lost cause?"

"No, we can free Narnia Peter, I'm sure of it."

"I'm not talking about Narnia Rebecca." He looked back up at me. "I'm talking about us."

"What do you mean?"

"I love you, don't you ever doubt that, but it seems the odds are always against us and no matter what we do we'll end up being apart?"

"Sometimes, yeah, I do feel like giving up." I confessed. "But you know what, I don't want to. I don't want to erase you from my mind, I don't want the memories to fade, I want to make more and more even though I know it will only hurt me in the end."

"I wish I could spend the rest of my life with you." Peter gently placed his hand on the side of my face. "I really, really do."

"I know." I pressed my forehead against his. "Now, just shut up and kiss me."

And he did, it was salty form the tears we had both shed. I think we had finally come to term with the fact that we will never get that happy end. That our souls are so closely linked yet our lives so far apart. We pulled away from each other and remained silent, letting it all sink in.

"Peter?" A voice soon came to interrupt us.

Edmund stood at the entrance looking sceptical.

"Yes." Peter looked up at him.

"We can't delay much longer. Miraz is ready."