CH. 9

You came all this way to see me
There must be something I should know
Did you come here just to leave me
Cause I don't wanna let you go
I know you need more from me
Than I can give so now we'll see
If we can get along as real good friends
There's no need to say goodbye
We may be better off as real good friends

"Waldorf," he greeted slowly.

"Bass," she responded.

Chuck stared at her longer than was polite and figured he was probably making her uncomfortable. She looked like a goddess before him; the midnight blue fabric of her long, flowing dress that draped Grecian style over one shoulder accentuated her creamy, glowing complexion. Seeing her again this close in the light set the fire on slow burn low in his gut. "What can I do for you?" he asked with a crooked grin because he knew it would piss her off.

"Can I come in or are we going to have this conversation in the hallway?" she inquired icily.

He opened the door wider and stepped back, allowing her entrance. "You look good, Waldorf," he told her, slowly appraising her appearance from head to toe. It gave him a thrill to watch her shift ever so slightly.

"Shut up," she said quietly.

Chuck raised his brows and fought the urge to laugh. Chuck Bass was many things, but stupid wasn't one of them. And laughing in an angry woman's face was the epitome of stupid. He shoved his hands into the pockets of his trousers as they silently sized each other up.

Only once the air was ripe with tension did she speak again. "What are you doing here?" she asked, raising her arms and letting them fall to her sides.

"I live here," he said, his tone matter of fact. He strode to the bar. "Drink?"

She bit back an oath and sighed instead. "Dirty martini—"

"Gin, two olives. I know how you like your martinis, Blair." He glanced up from the bar as he mixed the drink and was again humored by the completely perplexed look on her face.

She took a seat across the bar and folded her hands in her lap. "Is this a visit or are you back for good?"

"What would you like it to be?" he asked pouring her drink into the glass.

"Don't be cute, Chuck."

"But I am cute," he retorted with a wink. Her response was a withering glare. "I'm back for good." He set the martini in front of her and raised his glass to her. "To New York?"

When she didn't raise her glass he took a sip from his anyway. Her head was cocked slightly to the side and the look on her face indicated that she clearly found no humor in this situation at all. "Can you drop the whole 'I'm Chuck Bass' shtick for five minutes so we can have an honest conversation?" she asked in an exasperated tone.

His face sobered and he took another drink of his martini, studying her over the top of his glass. "It's not a shtick as you so eloquently put it, but fine. What do you want to talk about?" He walked around the bar and sat on the stool next to her.

"Why did you decide to come back? Where've you been for the last few weeks? Why did you start avoiding my calls?"

"That's a lot of questions—" he started.

"You know what, it was a mistake to come up here," Blair snapped. "I'll just leave since you can't act like a grownup for five seconds." She stood to leave and his hand on her forearm stopped her.

"Sit down. Please. I'll answer your questions." Chuck's eyes pleaded with hers and he felt her soften ever so slightly.

As soon as she was seated she gulped down half of her martini in one swallow. "Five minutes. Go," she ordered.

The smile flirted with his lips. "God, you're bossy." She cocked a perfectly shaped brow and pressed her lips into a tight thin line. Chuck cleared his throat in an attempt to mask a laugh and continued. "The opportunity presented itself for me to move back to New York and I took it."

"Why?"

"Why? Come on, Blair, I hated Tokyo and you know that. I felt—cagey all the time—like I couldn't catch my breath. Why wouldn't I want to come back to the only home I've ever known?"

"Okay, well then why didn't you tell me you were coming back? Why did you disappear on me all of the sudden?"

"I had a lot to do. There were contracts to sign and loose ends to tie up. I'm sorry I stopped calling. And part of me thought it would be fun to surprise everyone. You were surprised, weren't you, Waldorf?" he asked pointedly, the humor lighting in his eyes.

"You could say that. There wasn't a better way to present your return than slinking around in the shadows at my benefit party?"

Chuck shrugged. "What can I say? I was bored and I thought it would be fun—which it was, by the way."

She sighed heavily. "You're an ass, Chuck."

He grinned quick and easy now. "So you've told me thousands of times during my existence."

"I wouldn't tell you if it weren't true, now would I?" she asked sweetly, sarcastically, lifting the glass to her lips.

"Where's the golden boy tonight? I didn't see him at your party." There was a fleeting look of pain and sadness in her eyes that was quickly replaced with a stony look. Most people would never have noticed, but he wasn't most people.

"Business trip," she replied, sitting straight as an arrow.

"Oh," he said with a slight nod.

"Oh? What the hell's that supposed to mean?" she asked acerbically.

Chuck's eyebrows lifted questioningly, wondering what the hell brought about the sudden outburst. "Nothing. What was I supposed to say?"

"I don't know," she sighed, leaning one elbow onto the bar and resting her head on her hand. "I'm sorry—I just got asked about a million times tonight where Nate was and every time I answered I got these looks from everyone—like they knew something I didn't. It was infuriating. I couldn't tell them to go fuck themselves as that wouldn't have been very ladylike or becoming of the hostess who was trying to get them to open their wallets for my cause. You're an easy target and I don't have to be polite around you."

"Gee, thanks."

Blair smiled easily now. "You're welcome. Well, I guess you've answered all of my questions, so I'll just go."

"You don't have to leave," he said softly. "We haven't seen each other in a long time."

"I should go. It's late and I'm exhausted."

Chuck nodded. If she didn't leave soon he thought he might turn into a mess that begged her to stay and that certainly was not a part of his plan. "Can you do me a favor?"

"That depends," she answered skeptically.

"Don't tell anyone I'm back. Not yet anyway. I want to surprise Lily first. She's been asking me to visit for awhile now, and you know me and surprises—"

"That I can do," she smiled softly. "So—thanks for the drink."

"Anytime," he said, his voice soft and low. He suddenly was completely unsure of his decision to come back to New York. Did he honestly think he could be in the same city as her and watch her marry Nate? Regardless of the things she'd professed while hammered on the phone, he wasn't going to act on anything that would push her further away. He'd rather have her as his friend then nothing at all. "It's good to see you," he decided finally after staring at her again.

She swallowed hard and smiled. "You too, Chuck."

Truth be told, Chuck didn't know who reached for the other first, but before he could snap his fingers they were on their feet and his mouth was crashing down on hers in a heated fury while the air sizzled with anticipation. Blair's fingers threaded through his hair, drawing him closer and she opened her mouth to him. Chuck plundered inside, their tongues now engaged in a passionate and somewhat furious tango as his hands ran fervently up and down her back. His teeth nipped then his tongue soothed her swollen bottom lip and he heard her moan softly in the back of her throat as he covered her lips fully with his again. His blood thundered in his ears and he felt like he was drowning. He could barely breathe but he didn't want to chance breaking whatever spell he was currently under. Chuck always knew that Blair Waldorf had the potential to be the death of him and if this was his time to go, he'd die a happy man. This kiss—full of passion and wanting, "I missed you" and "I'm sorry," anger and lust—if it was, in fact, to be his death knell, it was one hell of a damn good way to go. Greedily he sought more when her mouth, hungry against his own, changed angles and somehow deepened the kiss. Only when his brain was screaming for oxygen and he felt as though he would actually pass out did he regrettably pull away.

Their foreheads were pressed together and their panting was the only sound in the room. His heart hammered so hard in his chest that he wondered if she could hear it. Chuck opened his eyes slowly and found hers to still be closed, her hands resting on his shoulders. Her eyes fluttered open and went wide with shock. She took a giant step back from him and covered her mouth with her hand. "Blair—"

"No," she said sternly. "Oh, my God—I can't believe this," she whispered. "I have to go. It—it was a mistake to come here." She fumbled for her purse on the bar and rushed for the door. Chuck grabbed her arm and turned her around. "Get your hand off me," she said through gritted teeth.

"We should talk about this," he suggested lamely.

"I said take your hand off me! Now, Chuck!" she screeched. He dropped his hand and she recoiled as if he'd slapped her. "Why did you kiss me? Why would you do that?"

His brows furrowed together in aggravation. "Okay, look, sweetheart, I'm not entirely sure who kissed who first, but I damn well know that we were both kissing each other so don't blame this all on me," he snapped. "And don't look at me like I lured you up here to take advantage either. That's insulting even for you." His blood was still humming and now he was just pissed at the entire situation and his utter lack of self control where she was concerned.

"I wish you'd stayed in Tokyo," she said quietly.

Her words had barely been audible but they couldn't have sliced through him more efficiently had she shouted them. "You know where the door is. Get out."

Tears brimmed in her eyes and he saw her try to blink them back. "Chuck, I—"

"I said get out!" he yelled. He saw the two fat tears escape and trail down her cheeks before she turned away and slammed the door behind her. How could he have been so stupid to come back?

Blair managed to hold it together on the elevator ride down, but as soon as she was in the taxi, she cried the entire ride home. She cried because she was exhausted and she cried because Chuck was back in town. She cried because they'd shared a kiss that made all of her insides turn to mush and she cried for the way they'd left things. The kiss had thrown her so off kilter and filled her with such guilt that she was ready to get fitted for her scarlet 'A.' The rational part of her knew that he wasn't fully to blame for that kiss. He was absolutely right in that the kiss hadn't been one-sided. In fact, she'd kissed him as if her life had depended on it. That, in and of itself, was reason enough to sob. And then she had to go and lash out and tell him she wished he'd never come back to New York. Her face scrunched up as a fresh round of tears flowed freely down her face. The hurt on his face was the thing she hated the most about saying those words words. She hadn't meant them of course, but when she was backed into a corner the only thing she knew to do was to strike hard and strike first. They were both like that, and therein laid a majority of their problems.

Sniffling, she paid the driver and dragged her tired body upstairs. She wanted nothing more than to soak in a hot tub and perhaps hide under the covers for a few days. Outside her door, there was an enormous bouquet of flowers. Kneeling to pick them up, she found the card from Nate.

I'm sorry.

-Nate

He was making an effort and she'd been cursing him all night and kissing his best friend. She was a terrible person. Yep, she was definitely in need of the scarlet letter. After setting the flowers on the dining room table, she headed for the bath.

Once she was immersed in the tub, she sipped her wine and wondered how to apologize to Chuck. She didn't want to fight with him. They'd been able to forge a friendship on the phone and she would really like for that to continue. Of course she'd have to make certain that there would be no more kissing involved. Over the years, she and Chuck had had so many fights that she'd lost count. One fight in particular stuck out in her mind—not the cause of the fight, per se, as it had been so long ago—but it had been their first fight as a couple.

After a long night of tossing and turning, Blair got up early and went to grab breakfast. She felt so bad about the fight with Chuck that she had to see him and try to fix this. Armed with two coffees and a bag full of croissants, she walked across campus to his room, hopeful that he would forgive her for over-reacting.

She knocked insistently until he answered the door, disheveled and still half asleep. "Hi," she said shyly.

"Are you here to yell at me again? Because if you are, that quota has already been filled this week."

"I didn't come to yell at you, Chuck. Can I come in? I brought breakfast," she smiled, holding up the bag in her hand.

He yawned and rubbed his eyes, allowing her entrance to his room. He grabbed the offered coffee from her hand and grunted appreciatively as he drank. "Thank you."

"I, um, also brought croissants. Chocolate chip—your favorite."

Chuck sat on the edge of his bed. "Sounds to me like someone is sorry."

Blair walked over to the bed and sat next to him, relieved when he didn't scoot away. "I am sorry. I didn't sleep at all last night I felt so bad."

"Continue," he replied, staring at the wall.

Unfazed, she shifted on the bed to face him. "Hey," she whispered and waited until he turned to face her. "I completely over-reacted and I should've had more faith in you. I'm so sorry for picking a fight with you." She reached out and combed her fingers through his bed head. "It's just—well, it was our first fight and I got so scared that we were over."

"Blair," he scoffed, "that was hardly our first fight."

"It was our first fight as a couple," she said in a small voice, studying her manicure.

Chuck set his cup of coffee on the floor and tilted her chin up with his finger so he could see her eyes. "And I'm sure it won't be our last."

"Does that mean you're willing to forgive me?" she asked hopefully.

"Don't be stupid, Blair," he said lightly, "after everything we've been through to get to this point, I'm not going to throw it away over some lame fight."

She grinned hugely at him now and wrapped her arms slowly around his neck, hugging him close. "Glad to hear it. I really am sorry, Chuck."

His arms snaked around her waist and held her tight. "It's okay, babe, I forgive you."

Blair peppered his face with kisses and planted her mouth squarely on his. He lay back and took her with him. "What are you doing?" she asked.

"One good thing about fighting—we get to have makeup sex."

"Mmm," she smiled seductively. "Maybe we should fight more often then."

Chuck flipped her over and pinned her arms above her head. "We'll see, Waldorf. We'll see." He dropped his head and captured her lips with his.

Blair sighed and drank more of her wine. Obviously having sex with Chuck was out of the question now, though the mere thought of having sex with him again elicited tingles like she hadn't felt in ages. Scarlet letter. She could, however, take him to breakfast. If he would even see her, that is. Her cell phone rang and her first thought was Chuck. But it wasn't Chuck—it was Nate. "Hey," she greeted. "Yes, I got them; they are lovely, thank you. I'm sorry, too, Nate. I was just stressed about the event. Hmm? It went really well and we raised a lot of money. Thanks. A lot of people asked about you. Yeah, I am tired. Okay, I'll see you soon. Me, too." She hung up the phone and sank deeper into the bubbles. It was like prep school all over again…