The Boy and the Galvan Chapter 10: Messages From Ben, a ben 10 fanfic

I do not own the Ben Ten franchise or the Ghostbuster franchise. Surmstromming is rotten fish that people apparently eat even though it smells nasty.

Got a chapter idea quicker than I expected. I really like this one, and I hope you do too. It's something different.

Happy Halloween!

Messages From Ben

BEEP

"Geez, Azmuth. What's the point in giving me your number if you're hardly ever there to answer? Plus, you never return my messages, so what's the point in even having an answering machine? You don't even have a cool voicemail message! It's so boring and average. You need a tagline, or a catchphrase. Something that will stick with people. Like mine. It's-"

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"Your stupid machine cut me off. That's another thing-you need to extend the message length. Twenty seconds is not enough time. Anyway, like I was saying, my voicemail recording is 'You've reached Ben Ten. I'm probably out kicking alien butt, but I'll hit you up after I've finished saving the universe.' See? That's cool. We'll work on yours later. I'll think up something cool. So-"

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"Yeah, me again. The reason I was calling is because-uh…actually, I can't remember why I'm calling you. I guess I got distracted. You're totally rolling your eyes at me right now. I guess I can't blame you. I'll call back if I remember whatever it is I wanted to talk to you about. Couldn't have been too important. Later!"

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"So a funny thing happened to me at school today. I got my schedule, and it was a horrible surprise to discover that I had Advanced Calculus and Vectors as my first class. I didn't sign up for that. I hate math-yeah, you heard me right! I. Hate. Math. I went to my guidance counsellor, and she said that I changed my schedule a month ago, before school started. I thought to myself, who could have possibly gotten into my online school account to screw me over? Then it hit me-"

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"Hey, I'm not through ranting! It hit me as I was walking to the most dreaded class of high school that YOU have the power to mess with my classes. No one else knows my password, and no one else is smart enough to figure it out. YOU SIGNED ME UP FOR THIS TORTURE CHAMBER! How could you?! Physics was bad enough, but this is crap! I'm not smart enough for this! After today I'm changing it back to Philosophy 101. How do you like that?"

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"Azzzmuuuth! You can't just take the Omnitrix like that! It's not fair! I don't have any leverage against you! I don't wanna do Advanced Calculus and Vectors! It's my education! I WILL NOT BE MANIPULATED IN SUCH A WAY! When the universe falls apart because the wielder of the Omnitrix is not there to jump to the rescue, I hope you'll be able to live with yourself!"

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"…fine. I'll take the stupid course. You're so mean."

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"Hey. Uh…so I got my first Functions and Vectors test back today. I aced it. I guess you know what you're doing. Sorry for flipping out. Though you deserved a bit of it. Actually, quite a bit of it. Omnitrix stealer."

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"I just came up with a genius idea for a new smoothie flavour! Rook is totally for it, but Gwen thinks we're crazy and Kevin is staying neutral. Grandpa Max isn't entirely sold, but I think I can turn him around. But I need your opinion, too. Ready? Guacamole-Avocado Surprise! Haven't decided on the surprise ingredient, yet. But what do you think?"

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"I made a new discovery today. The Omnitrix is water-proof, but not exactly smoothie-proof. Oopsie?"

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"HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR AZMUTH, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! I hope you listened to that with the room full of Galvans. And I hope you're embarrassed. But seriously, happy birthday!"

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"Azmuth. Azmuth. Azmuth. Azzzzzzmuth. I know you're there. Answer meeeeeee. I'm lonely. All my friends are off doing stuff. Can I come chill? I won't break anything, promise. I'm gonna take this silence as a 'yeah, you can totally come over!' See you in a few!"

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"So I went to the Twenty-Third Dimension today. It's a long story. But the short version is that the Azmuth of the Twenty-Third Dimension is just as serious and no-nonsense as you are. Which led me to a conclusion; you are hopelessly boring in probably every dimension in existence. Reflect on that."

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"Grandpa Max showed me today's issue of Intergalactic Weekly. It's a good thing it's online, or else a lot of trees would have been killed in making a print version. But anyway, there was an article about me, saying how awesome I was and what a good job I was doing. And then there's a little comment in the middle of the article that says, and I quote, 'He's annoying and arrogant and completely impossible, but I suppose he's doing an alright job.' Thanks for that, buddy."

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"Hey, is there a way to put music on the Omnitrix? I keep losing my phone, and since the watch also functions as a calling device I figure if I can put music on this thing I can stop worrying about where my phone is all the time. And no, this is not a stupid question."

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"YOU LIAR! YOU SAID SURMSTROMMING WAS LIKE TUNA! IT IS NOT LIKE TUNA! I THINK I THREW UP SIX TIMES! MY STOMACH HURTS! YOU ARE SO MEAN!"

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"There's a Ghostbuster movie marathon on right now! I'm coming over! You are about to be introduced to the joys of classic Earth cinema. And no, you don't have a choice. I will use my powers of annoyance to persuade you."

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"You know, I'm surprised you haven't changed your number yet. Uh, don't get any ideas. I really do need to have your number. I'll try to be less annoying. But no promises."

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"Hey. I guess you're working. Which isn't a surprise, since you're always working. It was a really crazy day today. Paradox came and collected me, along with several alternate dimension Tennysons, to help defeat Eon and Vilgax, who collected an army of evil Bens. I don't know if they get to keep their Omnitrixes because the Azmuth of their dimension doesn't care or if they…took it by force. Anyway, I just wanted to say thanks. Thanks for putting up with me, for giving me second and third chances, for putting me straight when I'm starting to stray. I know I don't say thanks enough, but I really appreciate everything you've ever done for me. The evil Bens don't know what they're missing-and that's probably why they're so messed up."

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"Hey! I just realized! You extended the message length! Buddy, you are so awesome."

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