Dear Diary
Chapter 10
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A/N: Woah! Chapter 10! I honestly never thought I'd get past 5 :) This chapter is long because: a) it's chapter 10 so it's a bit of a milestone, b) it was better than splitting it and c) I got a bit carried away with all the cuteness! thank you so much to everyone who has stuck with this story! Please keep reviewing it makes me smile! Emily x
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He stood in the parking lot, dripping wet with the rain. I don't care, he thought. I feel nothing.
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"Mer!" Meredith turned to see Alex jogging towards her.
"Hey, Alex! What's up?"
"Can you help me out later? Can I come over?"
"Sure, you OK?"
"Yeah, I'm good. Just need your help with something."
"OK, come round about 7."
"Thanks, Mer." Meredith smiled at her friend and turned to face the rain. Damn Seattle. Rain, rain, rain!
"Dr. Shepherd?" Meredith was surprised to see Derek stood in the middle of the parking lot. "Dr. Shepherd you're gonna catch a cold."
"I don't care."
"But you can't spread anything,"
"I don't care, Meredith!" Meredith's mouth snapped shut. "Just," Derek held out an all-too-familiar looking book, "how long have you known?"
"What? Known what? What are you talking about?"
"Don't play dumb, Meredith! How long have you known?" Meredith sighed,
"Two weeks." Then Derek snapped. His knees buckled and he collapsed on the floor, soaking wet and shaking with immense sobs.
"Come on, you can stay at my place tonight." Meredith pulled Derek off of the ground and led him to her car.
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Derek Shepherd stood in the unfamiliar bathroom of Meredith Grey, staring at himself in the mirror. He looked terrible, his eyes were red-rimmed and his skin was ghostly-pale. He climbed into the shower, letting the boiling hot water pour over him. Addison had cheated. Addison had cheated on him with Mark Sloan. His best friend had slept with his wife. He felt numb, but he felt everything. All of his emotions just blurred into one: anger. Love, friendship, trust; they were all gone. After almost an hour, he got out and put on the t-shirt and jeans Meredith had left out for him. He smiled. Meredith. The blushing intern from the elevator. He had only known the girl for two weeks and yet he already trusted her, considered her a friend. He walked down the stairs and was greeted by Meredith stirring something in a pan. When she noticed him, she smiled softly.
"Hey, do you feel a bit better? I hope pasta's OK, I don't know how to cook much."
"Pasta sounds great, really. Thank you. Thank you for everything Meredith."
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After they had eaten, Meredith and Derek were sitting on the couch in her living room. They had chatted and Derek had even laughed. She really brought out the best in him. He hadn't even thought about Addison and Mark once.
"Rent, Sound Of Music, Grease or Singin' In The Rain?" Meredith asked as she flipped through her collection of musicals. She only watched musicals when she was really depressed, and only after tequila and dancing failed.
"Singin' In The Rain!"
They watched the film in amicable company, singing along with all of the songs. Derek was amazed at how easily Meredith had made him feel better. They were in the middle of You Were Meant For Me when Finn returned home. He decided not to disturb them and instead went upstairs to change out of his uniform. He walked into the room he shared with Meredith and sighed. He lay down on the bed and stared at the wall. He saw pictures lined up on the windowsill, pictures of him and Meredith. The earliest one was taken 5 years prior, it was the two of them in their on-campus bar. He remembered that night perfectly. They had bought loads of alcohol and opened a bar in their dorm. They were incredibly popular, no-one questioned Meredith Grey and Finn Dandridge. He lay there wondering if they made the right choice. They had been best friends since high school and had started dating a year after their graduation. His eyes scanned the shelf to find the next picture; graduation. Finn had his arm wrapped protectively around Meredith's shoulders and she was kissing him on the cheek. They were blissfully happy, so happy that Finn wondered if they made the right decision to make it more.
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When the film ended, Meredith and Derek collapsed onto the couch, completely worn out.
"That was fun." Derek said softly.
"Yeah, it was." Meredith agreed. Derek turned to face her,
"Thank you. Really, thank you for cheering me up."
"That's OK, Derek, I'm sure you would have done the same for me."
"Yeah," Derek nodded and smiled, "I think we should get some sleep." His phone then buzzed.
Reeeeeeaaaally busy in the ER! Get some sleep while you still can!
Callie x
He showed the text to Meredith who laughed.
"I think you're right! Right, you know your way to the guest room?"
"Yeah, and thanks again, Mer."
"No problem! See you tomorrow! Unless you get paged, my car keys are by the door if you do. Just text me if you take the car because I'll get Alex to pick me up."
"OK, thank you so much!" Meredith chuckled and disappeared up the stairs. When she got into her bedroom she saw Finn was already asleep. She got changed in silence and climbed into bed next to him.
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Addison was woken up at 3:30 by her pager. She saw Derek's name flash across the small screen and was immediately confused. He was neuro, why was he paging her? Maybe one of his patients was pregnant. Yes, that was it. She changed into her scrubs and dashed downstairs, opened the front door and ran straight into,
"Arizona?"
"Hey, Addie."
"Ari, what are you doing here? I just got paged, so-" Arizona cut her off,
"Derek has locked himself in an on-call room and he won't come out."
"Shit!"
"Wha-"
"Shit! Shit! Shit!"
"Am I missing something? Or-"
"I think he knows!"
"Oh! About you and-"
"Yes!"
"Shit."
"Oh my god! Thanks for coming to tell me, Ari!" Addison practically sprinted to her car.
"Good luck!"
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"Derek?" Addison knocked on the door of the on-call room, Callie stood three steps behind her. Derek opened the door after two minutes of knocking. His eyes were red and puffy and his cheeks were glistening with tears.
"I'm done." He said in a whisper. He pushed past his wife and friend and went back to his job.
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A/N: what did you think? My heart broke for Derek in this chapter! Please review, Emily x