A/N – Sunny feels ahead with a chance of showers.
Title: Murmurs of Heart
Summary: Little Emma pushes buttons and she tries to find a special word for someone.
"Not flesh of my flesh or bone of my bone, but heart of my heart and soul of my soul."
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"No school Mal!"
Emma, grumpy and six upon waking covered her head with a silk pillow. Storm disrupted sleep and waking in the master suite left her brain blurry. Rain sang on the glass of windows, natural alarm that drew her out of a deep dream as did the gentle brush to her cheek from a finger. She tried to snuggle into the covers again. Warm and comfy in nest as she was, the world was not where she wanted to be right now.
Mal had let the child sleep as long as possible, using the quiet time to get herself mostly ready for the day. Prying pillow from small hands Dragon was not beyond a bribe to get feet moving. "If you get up right now Emma, we will have time to stop by Granny's for a hot coco before school." Treat promised got a very tangled blonde head to rise.
Pink puffy pout. "Really?"
Smile cracking. "Really my darling, let's go. Your uniform is hanging up in your room." Even in the rising heat of Maine child would always go for a hot chocolate. Lifting Emma to the floor and pointing towards the door. "Go put your charm on and get dressed. I'll come help you sort your hair in a few minutes."
Emma's head, a rat nest from losing the loose braid in the tangles of sleep, begged attention. Glancing at the clock as little feet obeyed for the promise of chocolate Mal marveled at how Regina had done this for so long. On a good morning they tag teamed getting the girl out the door. This was the first time she was the sole coaxer. Proud of herself for the first step well done, she kept moving. Finishing her makeup with a snap of fingers, she went to the closet to change for the day. Emma returned shortly with a brush and two ribbons.
Little feet tried not to wiggle as they stood between a pair of knees. Brush began at her messy ends and worked up. "Fishtail braids?"
Mal paused, fingers not adept at the fancy weaves Regina seemed to fluidly produce. "How about a pony tail?"
"No."
Trying to remember another common hairstyle Emma would sometimes go with. "Pig Tails?"
Turning with lip. "Noooooo… I'm not a pony or a piggy Mal!"
Brush stilled. "Emma lower your voice. That is not how you ask for things."
"But I want Mama braids." Calmer tone but full of whine. A foot was about to stomp, but halted under firm blue.
"How about Dragon tails instead?"
Curious pout. "What are those?"
'We are about to find out.' On a whim Mal parted Emma's locks in half and swept each side into a high ponytail. "I'll show you in just a minute." From there she parted one tail into two sections and twisted the strands so they coiled together like a rope. Mal repeated on the other side and then tied off the ends. Modified pig tails at best, but adorable on Emma. Satisfied she stood.
Emma felt her head until a conjured mirror showed her the effect. Squealing in delight she popped a kiss on Dragon's cheek. "I like them!"
"Good, because it is time to eat quickly and get going." Time taken to get Emma out of bed, killed their chance at a hot breakfast.
"I want cheesy eggs please?"
Guiding to the door by hand Mal offered two options. "We may have berries and cereal or bagels and a banana. Which would you like?"
"Yucky."
Frank response had Mal laughing on the inside, but held her neutral expression. "Those are your choices this morning Emma." Restating as she had observed Queen doing when child pushed back.
"But we always have cheesy eggs on Monday."
Dragon couldn't argue with that. "We do, but there is not time if we want to be able to get your hot coco still." Even that was pushing their time frame to get to school before the first bell.
"Hmmmm, berries and cereal, I guess." Reaching tile of kitchen, Emma hopped up on her stool as Mal prepped their food.
Morning continued with the give and take banter. For every question or direction given Emma countered naturally, as did Mal though in thought before most responses. Three months of close observation had given Dragon the foundation to manage Emma's most basic routines without her Queen. Child was learning she meant what was said the first time and slowly they were making progress. Learning curve was steep, given she had no personal experience raising children and Emma presented a unique and rewarding challenge with the shifts and needs there. Mal loved every moment.
On their way out the door a mini melt down was brewing. Emma tapped her foot, face scrunched up in want as Mal donned the gray fedora that was worn occansionally.
A whine. "I wanna wear one too!" Grabby hands reached up for the hat, wanting something common to connect with in missing her Mama.
"I can't hear you when you whine, Emma. Try again with a please and in a regular tone." Mal corrected, willing to acknowledge the want, but with a modification the girl was more than capable of.
"Maaalll."
Dragon ignored the next whine entirely, prepping purse to leave for the day. Emma seemed to get the hint and poked her arm instead. Giving patient eyes. "Yes?"
"I wanna wear one please?"
"Thank you for asking in a way I can hear you." Smiling and with a finger snap, Mal conjured a new mini purple replica of her hat complete with holes for the Dragon tails and fitted it neatly on Emma's head. Lifting girl up when hands reached, she showed the child in the mirror on their way out the door.
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The rain, persistent, didn't give up against the rising heat of the day. Forced inside for recess children and teachers lacking a break were humid in temper along with the weather. Emma missing her time to run out building energy was a tightly wound mess after lunch. Quiet games in the classroom were the alternative available to her and frustrated she was less than cooperative, even with Gabe trying to engage her in a game of Chutes and Ladders. Fast friends again this life, Emma enjoyed his ready company, but not so much today.
After recess it was time for her weekly occupational therapy session to assist her with the Dysgraphia. Usually Emma enjoyed the time to practice writing in multi-sensory ways and the games that the therapist incorporated into their sessions. The only down fall was it was usually during her elective, art, that the therapist pulled her for intervention. Today, directed to go with the OT waiting at the classroom door by Mrs. Kathryn Prince, Emma was having none of it as her classmates lined up for art.
"I wanna go to art today, too." Blonde frowned when her teacher beckoned her to the front of the line to leave. "No thank you. Art please." Trying her manners when her statement went unanswered.
Patient, but no nonsense, Kathryn shook her head. "Good manners Emma, but you need to go now." Missing weekly therapy not an option if IEP was being followed to the letter.
"No." Trying again, Emma refused to move.
Kathryn tried another direction she thought might get little feet moving. "Would you like to call your Mama?"
Thinking it over, Emma's curls shook, wanting to talk to her Mama, but not over her lack of desire to do as she was being asked. Knowing well, how that conversation would end. "No, I want art." Foot itched to stomp, but held out.
Kathryn gave direction to the OT take the rest of the students to art class and come back for Emma in a few minutes. Child tried to follow, but teacher knelt in the door way to eye level. "Why don't you want to go to your OT?"
"Just don't."
Not a helpful response, Kathryn stood. "I think we need to call Emma. Maybe talking will help."
Tears brimmed green. "Nuh-huh. Mama is gone."
Remembering that Regina was on a trip, Kathryn nodded. "And I bet you miss her so much. Let's call to say hi and then maybe you will change your mind." Reaching for the phone despite little protests, she dialed Regina. Queen picked up on first ring. Sharing about Emma's upset only had tears falling from the girl, not her intended effect. Handing the phone over, she watched as they fell faster still.
"Hi Mama." Emma cradled the phone with both hands and gave a hearty sniff at the missed tone coming through the ear piece.
"Hello baby." Regina greeted. "Tough day?"
"Yeah, and it's raining too. Is Paige ok?"
A pause. "We will know soon."
"I miss you Mama."
"I miss you too and I will be home very soon." Regina hated that she had to break the sweet moment. "I hear you do not want to go to your OT session. How come?"
"I want art instead…" Emma went on to explain the pain of a rainy day and lack of recess as more wet heat fell. "And no ooonnne is listening to me!"
Tired from the long night, Regina pinched her brow at the shrill whine. "It can feel that way sometimes Emma. Though the therapy to help support your writing skills is nonnegotiable. That means this is not a time when something is your choice. Sometimes we need to do things we do not like because they are good for us."
"But I don't want too." Wiping cheeks as anger floated in.
"Emma—"
"No Mama." A foot stomped.
Regina sighed. "Not a good choice baby."
"Don't care."
"You and I will be speaking a little later then. Give the phone back to your teacher please." Regina directed and waited.
Puzzled at the lack of further direction, Emma handed the phone back, shifting in uncertainty as teacher eyed her and the call was wrapped up. More confused came when another call was placed. Kathryn requested whoever was on the other end and a tummy knotted as that call ended. She had a few minutes to ponder before she heard familiar clicking approaching the doorway.
Emma let her heat speak when Dragon appeared. "No… Won't go with you." Sitting on the floor in protest.
Mal stepped into the room and went right over to a pink cheeked little girl. Extending a hand. "Stand up Emma." Principal voice worked to her advantage in the moment and six year old slowly go to feet after a very long minute.
Arms crossed. "I don't want to go with you."
"That's too bad because you are anyway."
"I don't want…" Training off as her hand was taken.
Without a word further Mal escorted Emma out of the room. They walked together a short distance to the office and into Mal's private one. Door closing, Emma gulped as blue eyes came down to her level. Wondering which role Dragon would take.
"Refusing directions from your teacher is not something you are allowed to do. Nor is telling your Mama or I no Emma." Tone warm, Principal neutrality left when the door closed on them.
Role defined as personal, Emma's lip quivered, but held stubborn. "How'd you know?"
"That is not the issue." Straightening up Mal continued with confidence. "You seem to need some time to think about that and your misbehavior before we finish talking and you have your OT session." Guiding little shoulders to a corner, and losing some poise as Emma squealed in protest.
"Maaal." Giving wide wet eyes up in pleading.
Green almost broke her resolve. Mal knew exactly where the upset was coming from and she sympathized, truly. Regina's brief coaching via text after Kathryn called her fueled determination enough to adjust child's shoulders back where eyes should be. Sheer luck or something else, she was not sure, had Emma calming under the familiar routine. It was the longest six minutes of sniffle, tear filled angst Mal had endured. And boy did Emma ham it up. Wanting to simply scoop child up and make the world better, yet she knew that is not what Emma initially needed from her, but now with time over her arms did just that.
Falling heavy in both body and thoughts to sit on a lap where she needed to be, Emma returned the hug she was wrapped up in. Purple fedora was pushed back as burgundy kissed her forehead. There was a one word affection wanting to come out to accompany her apology, but girl hesitated in wonder of how it would be received. Instead she let one stand lonely for now. "S-sorry."
Mal used a tissue to clear tear tracks away. "Missing your session is not an option. Your hand and brain need the practice to keep making progress with your writing."
Nodding, girl blew her nose when prompted. "Don't like writing today."
"I hear you Emma and you were put in time out to rethink how you were expressing that and telling the adults you need to listen to no. Do you understand?"
"Yes Mal, but I still don't like it."
At the affirmative, Mal continued. "You don't have to like it, but you will go without issue or we will have round two in the corner. Are you ready to share that apology with your teacher and go to your session?" Getting a nod and knowing there were more layers to be peeled away she lifted Emma up and took a hand, leading way back to the classroom.
Emma completed her OT and finished the day without further concerns. The final bell had little feet returning to the Dragon's office, pensive since her time out. Little blonde opened homework folder and got right to work without the usual prompting as Mal finished up some paperwork and daily checks before it was time to go home at 4:30. Saying next to nothing in the car, despite attempts from Dragon at conversation, Emma replied with minimum expected of her. Conflicted over the day, her behavior, and Mal's response she dragged feet into the mansion after heels. Reminded again home was not completely as it should be tummy tightened remembering her Mama's promise to talk later.
Backpack dropped from little shoulders and she kicked it to slide against the coat rack. Getting an expectant brow, much like her Mama's when she was pushing her luck, Emma sighed and picked up the bag to hang the way she was taught. As anxiety grew, she sided up to Dragon after as a purse was sorted out by the door in the foyer. Words wouldn't find her mouth, but they didn't need to, she realized. Mal's hand rested on her head as she wound arms around hips and she settled under a knowing blue gaze. Both missing the third side to their triangle. And something else too, Emma realized she was having trouble naming so she stated what she could.
"I want m-my Mama." Reaching hands up for comfort.
Mal lifted Emma to her hip as tears flowed from green again. "I know darling. Come here."
Tired and done with the day Emma burrowed into platinum hair, breathing in. Lemons. Mal always smelled of lemons and faintly, even now in absence, of apples. She closed her eyes. Taking another breath pretending she was in Mama's arms, but as a soft humming began Emma realized she didn't have to…
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Hours later after a needed call from her Mama that Paige's test results came back negative save for one and release would occur in the morning, Emma brightened that there was some good news that would be shared soon. Glad to hear that voice and the promise of it in person tomorrow evening, brain processed what she could understand of explanations to questions she posed. Growing sleepy Emma made her apologies for earlier and said a reluctant good night. Phone given back to Mal, she crossed to the far side of the Dragon's home office as conversation was wrapped up to return playing with Legos.
"We miss you too..." Mal confirmed that and Emma's overall well being as she watched a yawn rip through a pink mouth. She went on to explain in brief her chat with the teen side the night prior about reminders and the successful magic lesson. As topic shifted again to the reason for Regina's visit she asked. "How is Henry?"
Regina smiled fondly over the phone. "Tired, we both are, but his usual hopeful self. We are going to head back to the apartment and get some things together for Paige for the morning and then head to bed…" Mirroring a yawn hundreds of miles away.
Chuckling Mal leaned back in chair and crossed her legs, adjusting the cell phone to her ear. "It has been quite the day, my Queen. I don't think any of us are long for this world." A chime of the clock at half past seven prompted both of them to wrap up their call. "I need to get a little someone ready for b-e-d." As she spelled the word, Emma's ears perked up and gave a silent plea for more time to play across the room. "Goodnight Regina… I love you." Call ended she stood.
"Just a little tiny bit more? Pleaaasee?" Sweet as can be, Emma begged.
"You have five minutes and some of that needs to be spent cleaning up. I am going to start your bath meantime. Do you want bubbles?"
Looking at her mess and suddenly done in favor of bubbles. "Yeah, but I'm done now. Will you help me… please?"
The please hard won after the long day, Mal readily agreed and together they put away the rainbow blocks in storage tub. A wrist wave returned it to the lavender room and girl hurried ahead to the bathroom. Water ran and bubbles poured, some chatter returned between them up until fifteen minutes later when the tub drained. Mal sensed something heavy weighed on Emma as she helped the child out of the tub and wondered about opening that conversation before bed. Worry of pulling thoughts to surface would disrupt sleep little girl needed, she decided to leave it until the morning.
A quick wrap up in a duck towel and a tickle of ribs gained a small smile. Taking Emma into the lavender room Dragon reached into the bottom drawer of a dresser and held up two choices. "Nightgown or short set?"
"Nightgown."
Mal helped Emma dress in a Lilo & Stitch nightgown and yellow socks. She also managed the simplest of braids on either side of girl's head. Jasper fed, Emma crawled into bed and snuggled down to be read to. Sleep stole consciousness from the room shortly after and Mal tucked blankets with a lingering kiss. She watched child rest for a few minutes before heading back to her office to get a bit more work done before getting ready for bed herself.
An hour passed with notes and typing when a creak at the door caught her attention. Pulled from deep thoughts, Mal turned sharply to find glassy green watching. Softening as the rain outside registered another storm rising, common for this time of year, she went to Emma and lifted girl to her hip for what felt like the dozenth time that day, but each time felt new on its own and she enjoyed having the child so close. "Did the rain wake you darling?"
Head shook, thumb firm in mouth.
"A nightmare?" Pacing and rubbing a back.
Going slack, Emma tried talking around the comfort in her mouth. "Not weally…" Then dropped it. "But kinda… my head's full again."
"Full?"
"Too many thinking thoughts won't let me sleep." Emma returned thumb to mouth.
Blue closed, grief that she had been wrong not to pursue Emma's upset before bed. "What kind of thoughts Emma?" Moving out of her office and back to the lavender room, Mal settled them on the bed, child in lap.
A shrug as words tangled.
Prompting. "Does this have anything to do with what happened at school earlier?"
Crinkle in brow Emma pouted, losing her thumb again. "Kinda, but not."
"Kind of how?" Mal wondered if her inexperienced questions would get them anywhere and surprised when Emma threw a curve ball.
"Who are you?"
"I'm your Mal." Confusion set in when child did not respond. "How else do you mean darling?"
Little cheeks turned pink and a chin ducked to chest at the affection, need to know what she didn't know how to ask coming out wrong. Flustered, braids shook. "Never mind."
Mal's thumb brushed a cheek, coaxing eyes up. "No, not never mind. Something is bothering you Emma, I can tell. Take a moment and think, then try again."
"I'm not upset like that. Different and I don't know how to say it." Lightening flashed outside and Emma shrunk tight at the following din against a shoulder. Ready as she was or not to ask her question a different way did not matter then, the words would not come any further tonight.
Sensing their talk was done due to the storm Mal promised what comfort she could. "Then for now I will just hold you." A ready nod from Emma had Mal kick off heels and sitting back against the headboard. Together warm and kept against the storm raging war outside, Mal wondered at the one brewing in the little mind resting under her chin.
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Morning came bright, even through the thick drapes of the master suite. Mal's nose twitched as the smell of cinnamon apples along with… then something brushed by her face. Cracking tired eyes to the room, she discovered one culprit; blue fur from a well loved stuffed toy. The rest of last night blurred into focus as she sat up with a heavy sigh, body ached from holding a little one most of the night. Emma had not let her go during the storm, even after sleep claimed the child a second time. Needing some rest of her own, but not wanting to deny Emma comfort she had taken child to bed with her.
Laying still as child slept on, Mal simply watched in wonder of the sweet route her life had taken. Emma shifted, curling up against her chest, wrinkled thumb slipping from a pink mouth. Their hair, platinum and gold, crossed paths on a pillow. Clock near to blaring time to awaken, magic killed the alarm before it could disturb the peace of morning. Tracing a circle on the back of a small cheek, Mal tried coaxing girl to rise.
Lashes fluttered with a wrinkled nose, brief. "Mmmmm…."
Smiling and repeating the gesture. "Time to get up, my darling."
"Nooo." Dreamy and high. "Sleepy Mmm…"
So quiet, but her sharp ears heard it. Burgundy parted and Mal froze. Heart on her sleeve and melting, but in unrest. She and Regina hadn't discussed this possibility or what it would mean or how to respond or not respond or—. Thoroughly surprised she didn't speak and Emma appeared completely un-aware, as little breaths rose and fell over the next few minutes. Rising slowly Mal took up her cell from the night stand and left into the bathroom as child slept. Door closed she called the one number that could give her mind direction.
Regal voice thick and deep in broken sleep picked up. "M-al?" Regina tried against the silence through the ear piece and again when her lover still did not speak. "Mal, what's wrong?"
"Regina… She—Emma…"
"Hey it's okay, take a breath for me." Waiting for her Dragon as she sat up in bed. "What happened with Emma?"
"Nothing is wrong like that." Palm to forehead assuring, Mal paced the small room. "She's missing you a lot and the last few nights there have been storms here and I let her sleep in our bed and that seemed to help. Last night she was upset and we tried talking, but I didn't know what to say to help her and she shut down. Then this morning… I don't think she realized she did, but… she called me Mommy, Regina." Not sure if she'd overstepped and caused that reaction or to jump for joy… Her Queen was quiet for a moment as her heart murmured in wait.
"I am not sure what to say other than I'm sorry I missed it."
Hearing the red grin over the line lifted Mal's mouth right up, but still she needed to say it. "I never would have pushed—"
"I know Mal." Regina chuckled softly over the line. "Emma has a way of throwing one for a complete head spin just by opening her mouth. First time she called me Mama, I felt like I had rocks in mine trying to respond to her. I was taken completely off guard… Is she still sleeping?"
Peeking around the doorway. "She is and I don't think she knows what she said."
"Then we will leave it alone for today. Sub-conscious it may be, but we will all need to discuss it at some point soon." Hopeful from the response so far, Regina asked. "How do you feel about the idea of her calling you that?"
"Honestly?" Biting inner cheek as she rested head against the door way. Blue eyes closed to the room for a moment. "Terrified I will somehow mess this up because I want this. The family we have growing, with you and her, so much." Pausing Mal realized there was something else; primal. "Emma has always had your scent for as long as I've known her and this morning when I woke, for the first time her scent was different."
Queen took a ready breath of speculation. "How so my love?"
"Ours Regina. Her scent is a mix of both of us." Cheek against wood, gaze open and held the child resting. "You already know, but I need to say it again. I'm in this for the long run my Queen, where ever that road leads us."
Scratching the bottom barrel of vulnerable, Regina's eyes misted. Then clear and bright. "Me too."
Delicate warmth pricked each corner of blue sky. Grateful then Mal was, even hundreds of miles away, that she could feel Regina's arms holding their hearts close.
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A/N – Hope you liked it! I cut the chapter a bit shorter than I originally intended because this was sssooooo perfect right here.
Next time – Regina comes home to a happy little one. A look at Queen and Dragon engaging behind closed doors *wiggles eyebrows and winks*. Teen Emma asks one question…. twice and upset unfolds in a way she was not expecting but maybe needs to happen. Bit of a cliffhanger chapter.