Standard Disclaimers Apply. The rights to Rurouni Kenshin are exclusively owned by Watsuki Nobuhiro, Sony Entertainment, Shueisha, Jump Comics and other associated groups. Do not sue!!! I am writing this to satiate my urge to write.
Be Still My HeartChapter Nine
"Is cooking really hard?" Kaoru asked as she hauled different sorts of vegetables in the counter.
"No, not really, it just takes practice."
"So," she began, skillfully mincing the garlic cloves. "Who taught you how to cook?"
"Actually, nobody did," he shrugged, bringing over the bucket of tofu and some kobe. "I just learned it on my own. Before Shishou accepted his job here, we used to live in the mountains and I was the one who cooked for him."
"So, it's all in the talent," she teased, giving him a furtive glance.
"No, not really. My cooking used to be really, really bad," he announced humbly, handing Kaoru a pot. "I guess in time, I learned how to do it right."
"I wonder how long it would take me," the raven-haired girl thought aloud, unconsciously tapping the metal pot.
Kenshin smiled inwardly upon seeing her thoughtful face. He almost didn't want to disturb her but they must continue unless they want to finish at the break of dawn. He waved his hands in front her eyes to snap her out of her stupor.
Kaoru blinked a couple of times in response as she looked at him quizzically.
"Come here, I'll teach you how to cook rice." Kenshin motioned Kaoru to stand beside him as he began to show her the basics. "The ratio of good rice is always four cups of kome to five cups of water."
"Okay," Kaoru mentally noted, watching him closely.
He cleaned the kome by pouring water in it, stirring it slightly with his hand then draining it. "Repeat this for about three to four times."
Wanting to try for herself, she tapped his shoulders gently, gesturing him to move over.
Kenshin smiled at her initiative and stepped aside.
Sighing in nostalgia, she whispered sadly, "You know what? When my mother was alive, she used to cook for us."
"Isn't that the job of the helpers?" he asked, smiling weakly upon seeing her cheerless face.
"It is. But, she took great joy in preparing food for my father and I."
"That is so nice of her. She must be really special…"
"She is."
"...just like you," Kenshin muttered under his breath, biting his lips upon the realization that he had said it out loud.
Kaoru's eyes widened upon hearing his barely audible comment. The blue-eyed girl lowered her head to hide her flushed face, placing the pot on top of the firewood after she finished draining it for the prescribed time.
Kaoru thought it best to just pretend that she didn't hear anything. When the pot was properly placed, she returned to the vegetables she was cutting a while ago. Trying to disperse the air of tension that surrounded them, she asked, "So, what am I going to do with this again?"
"The easiest way to cook that is by boiling."
"So what am I going to do?"
"Easy, just pour some water on another pot, place the vegetables inside and let it simmer in low to medium heat."
"Sounds simple," Kaoru grinned, following Kenshin's instructions.
As they waited for the food to cook, Kenshin and Kaoru leaned on the counter, adjacent to each other. They stared outside the window, watching the night clouds go by. Finally breaking the silence, Kaoru asked, not meeting his eyes, "How long do you plan on staying here?"
"Huh?" came his reply.
"Here as in here in the school."
"I don't know," he shrugged.
"You mean, that thought never crossed your mind?" she turned to him, with an unbelieving expression on her face.
"No," he replied. "Why?"
"Nothing," Kaoru shrugged, focusing her eyes to the evening sky once again.
After a few minutes, Kenshin sighed, "I guess the reason I have never thought about leaving is that I don't really have anywhere else to go."
"Don't you even plan on marrying someday?" Kaoru inquired, peering at him at the corner of her eyes as she mentally chanted, Please say no. Please say no. Please say—
"Actually, I had already thought about that."
"Oh..." Kaoru whispered, trying hard to keep her voice normal. Kaoru no baka! You shouldn't be feeling this way. After all, you are just his best friend. Besides, you were the one who brought up the topic… what do you expect? That he'll tell you that he is in love with you?
"But I can't love her," he suddenly said. "I can't take the risk because I know that she'll… that she'll never reciprocate my feelings," Kenshin faltered with unvoiced sadness as he lowered his head to hide his eyes.
"Why is that?"
"Because we are worlds apart…"
Kaoru frowned upon hearing that. She didn't know if it was because of her best friend's unrequited love or just the fact that he loves another. Pursing her lips together, she advised, "Maybe she doesn't deserve you if she makes you feel unworthy. You need someone who is—"
"No one else is more deserving than her," he protested, cutting her off.
Kaoru was taken aback at his conviction, silently cursing her heart for aching. Dammit! Why am I feeling this way!!?
"She is brave, intelligent, strong both in mind and body. It is I who doesn't deserve her. We are from different social classes," Kenshin finished, still not looking at the person beside him.
Not knowing that his words were directed to her, her heart refused to encourage his feelings for the other. But… she had to be true to herself. She had to be true to their friendship. Almost painfully, she said, "Class standing doesn't really matter anyway as long as—"
"Yes, I do love her," he burst out as he turned his head to look directly in her eyes.
Forgetting her masculine façade, Kaoru's eyes widened, feeling as if she were melting as she stared back at his passion-filled eyes.
"She is my light…"
Her heart beating rapidly at his intense gaze, but she didn't look away. Instead, she placed her hand on his shoulder, motioning his whole body to face her.
Kenshin followed, his body blocking the moon's rays as he caressed her partially opened lips. "…my smile…" Caressing her ebony locks, he leaned in and whispered to her ear, "…and most importantly my best—"
Kenshin's last word, along with the moment, was cut off when cigarette smoke filled their senses. They jumped a mile apart as they darted their eyes towards the door in anticipation.
"Saitoh-san," Kaoru greeted, inwardly scowling.
Both Kenshin and Kaoru bowed reverently upon his arrival.
"Kamiya, proceed to my office now," Saitoh ordered sternly, not even acknowledging her greeting as he gave both of them a piercing glare.
Kaoru had a gut feeling about why she was called but she decided that the best way to handle the situation was to feign innocence. Giving him a quizzical look, she asked, "Sir, how about the food?"
"Himura will take care of that," he barked as he turned to leave.
Kaoru gave Kenshin a worried glace which he answered with a confident nod. Taking a deep breath, she followed her teacher close behind.
"What is it that you want to speak to me about?" she asked upon entering his office.
Saitoh smirked at her straightforwardness. Puffing out a huge cloud of smoke, he asked, "What were you doing there?"
"I am learning how to cook just like you ordered," Kaoru replied, her face expressionless.
"Is that all?"
"Yes, sir. Is there anything else that I should be doing?"
Saitoh kept his face impassive though the thought of a woman answering his query with another question deeply pissed him off. Raising his eyebrow, he pronounced, "You and Himura are getting too close for comfort."
"It seems so," Kaoru responded, keeping her head high in confidence. "But Himura-san and I are just friends. I believe there is nothing wrong with that." The young lady looked at him with her challenging eyes, slightly narrowing them. "There isn't a law in Bushido that states that samurais are prohibited to associate."
"There isn't," he said through gritted teeth. "Just make sure it stays that way."
"It will." Bowing her head slightly, she stood up, motioning to leave. "Will you excuse me, I have return to my cooking lessons. I plan on preparing a decent meal on Friday."
"You may go."
When she had reached the door, she turned her head for the last time. "Thank you for the advice, but I don't need it, with all do respect, Sir," she declared, stressing the last words. With that, she pulled the door open.
"Kamiya?"
"Yes, sir?"
"You don't need to sneak into the abandoned dojo every night, its not such a big secret, you know. You are just wasting your energy."
Blood drained from Kaoru's face upon hearing that but she kept her composure. Looking at him at the corner of her eyes, she smirked, "Then I guess you know that there is nothing to be worried about."
"On the contrary..."
At that, Kaoru turned around to face him, letting her eyes do the talking.
"Let me warn you Kamiya that you were not accepted in this school as a woman but as a fighter."
"I know that." She bowed at him once again and smiled, "But whoever said that I came here as a woman." She let her smile widen as she turned to leave.
Saitoh huffed, "We'll see about that."
~~~~~
Kaoru returned to the kitchen, her eyebrows furrowed in frustration. How dare he imply that something is going on between Kenshin and I. There is absolutely nothing going on between us! Nothing!
'You were accepted in this school not as a woman but as a fighter.'
Not as a woman.
A fighter.
Honored fighters do not feel.
Slumping her shoulders, Kaoru sat down on the hallway, leaned on a post and closed her eyes, recalling the incident earlier.
'She is my light, my smile and my best—'
Kaoru shook her head violently in irritation, pounding her fists with every syllable I mustn't think this way. I mustn't act this way. I mustn't feel this way…
Her silent mantra was cut short when Kenshin placed his hand on top of her shoulders, beckoning her to come inside, "The food is cooked, let's taste what you have prepared."
Kaoru smiled weakly, following him inside. She stared at his back sadly, reminding herself of her purpose. To train for war to protect her family's honor and nothing else.
Kenshin handed her a bowl, which contained the cooked food, and smiled, "You have greatly improved, Kamiya-dono."
"All because of you, Kenshin." At that, she began eating her food in silence.
Kenshin watched, noting the change in her demeanor. Something must have happened to her at her meeting with Saitoh. Kuso! This is all my fault! I shouldn't have let my guard down a while ago. If only I hadn't— I should have never allowed my feelings to take over. Chikuso!!!
Unconsciously, Kenshin punched the floor with much force causing Kaoru to look up at him, eyes mixed with fear and confusion. She stammered, "Are you alright?"
Kenshin nodded, smiling half-heartedly, "Yes. Sorry for disturbing you."
Kaoru didn't press the matter any more as she continued eating in silence.
Kenshin picked up his rice bowl, sighing as he chewed the dish, I guess this is the only time I will be able to eat her cooking. Curse my stupid heart for even thinking that I could hold her as mine.
'Class standing doesn't matter…'
She is young. She doesn't know what she is talking about.
But what if she is truly different from the others…
…No, that is the exact reason why I can't have her.
I don't deserve her. Not like this.
Kenshin looked up, only to have his eyes met with bright blue pools. They held each other's gaze, allowing their eyes to speak of things their hearts refuses to accept and their lips refuses to say.
Author's Notes:
Minna-sama, thank you very, very much for nominating 'Be Still My Heart' in the RK awards!!!! ^__^ I hope you would continue to support this fic! ^__^ Anyway, it has been a while but the numerous responses I got for this fic overwhelmed me. Thank you so much!!! :bows down:
Notes:
Relena Maxwell- I'm sorry but there won't be any love triangles here. There would be in the sequel. Hehehe….
ShimmerNymph- slow romances appeal to me more. I don't like the idea of rushed love. ^__^
Ryuokami- yes, it is a unisex name but it is often given to a girl. My Japanese friend told me it means something like fragrant… [no wonder Kenshin can't get enough of her!
Shiko- oh the real romance will begin soon enough… I haven't even begun yet! ^_____^ Lemon? Why not! :evil grin:
Michiru Kashyuuno, Tatsumaki, Leigh, Chiki, Bunny, Vesca, Lizzie, Kriska, Yawarako, Aku-chan, Val, Skipper, Gypsy-chan, LittleDragon5, Lisa, Chitchat, penggu2000, Kelly-dono, JML, Just some nobody, Confused, J. Liha, Nikki, MP, genocide ex-sync*in- thanks for correcting me in Chapter Eight. Sorry if I confused you all.
Kaoru Himura- thanks for the fanart again!! ^__^ Mwah!!!
Marstanuki- as always. Muchos gracias!
Hoshi ni onegai, Sakuma Ryuichi, Omochi, January, Kumo, Aniprinzess, Claria, Rekka's Angel, Sandy, Naomi, Isis, Sujakata, StillbornAngel, Anime Panda, C-Chan, Yume Kuroi, Shizuka, SoonChaos, child-of-the-owl, emsdesire, GundamGurl84, Redhead Samurai, KyrowenGoldenFire, Mary, Gwenivere, Dernhelm, Paranoid Novice, Rhodry, Esperanza
I am sorry if I won't be able to write individual thank you notes! It is because… I decided to give you all a gift instead…
On to the next chapter!!!