The next day was an early morning Megan woke up earlier than me finally letting go of my arm and slightly waking me up trying to be careful with her movements. I woke up stretching out my arms feeling different I looked at my arm remembering how soft her skin was against mine the small amount of warmth that lingered off her body the way her light breathing made the hairs on my arm stand up. The idea of my actually crawling under the same covers as her, filled my head just the thought of having her in my embrace made my heart race but I shook it off thinking I'd be rushing it. It's to soon to even think like that let alone, feel this way about someone. I packed up the camera and a couple of other things before heading out of the room. The idea was somewhat of a class trip since hardly anyone ever felt safe leaving the warehouse they stayed inside only going out when it was absolutely necessary and even then they didn't go far. So after everybody completed their training me Rock Megan Dj and Chad planned a camping trip near a waterfall for everybody just so the could relax for once and have some form of fun. Me Rock and Megan stole at least six cars and four trucks hoping that was enough to fit everybody. It was a tight squeeze but everybody managed to cram inside after a two-hour drive and a forty-five-minute hike up to the mountain top we finally made it to the waterfall. Everybody broke off into the teams setting up camp hunting food or laying out stretching from the hike after twenty minutes or so everybody was enjoying themselves swimming cooking laughing playing joking somebody found a battery-powered radio and a few CDs so everybody could listen and dance to what little songs they had. I just sat around enjoying the warmth of the sun on my body staring at the clouds but after a while, I knew it was time so I got up and started looking around for Megan.

"Yo Chad have you seen Megs anywhere?" I asked

"I wish I could use some help setting up some targets for a little competition between the gun heads. Are you to busy to help out?" He asked

"Yeah but I'll definitely come around if they want some serious competition," I said walking off before bumping into DJ

"Hey Teach! Are you going swimming too, I heard the water feels just great," He said

"You know you don't have to call me Teach right? It makes me feel old and maybe I gotta take care of something first. Have you seen Megan?" I asked

"I saw her helping out Rock earlier something about cooking up yesterday's hunt and making a huge feast. As a matter of fact, there they go right there," He pointed out

Rock isn't close to becoming Gorden Ramsey so when I saw him trying and I mean Trying to light the fire all I could honestly think about was the last time he cooked and served burnt meat. It was so burnt that it looked like a stone you'd find near a volcano and what wasn't burnt was way undercooked so it was a sigh of relief when I gave the job to somebody else and Megan taught him how to properly cook food still it's a process he's still learning now.

"I pray to God she'll be the one cooking," DJ said

"We all are. Anyway, you should still take it easy just because your concussion was mild that doesn't mean the effects isn't there." I said

"Yeah I know I know but at least I managed to do something right for a change and between you and me it's a great opening line for meeting some of the ladies." He said

"Okay playboy. I'll catch up with you later." I said before heading over to Rock and Megan

"So, what should I cook up first?" Rock asked

"Nothing. You can wrap up the potatoes though," Megan said

"Come on, I can't improve with cooking unless I actually cook something." He said

"And have everybody here get food poisioning...no thanks we chose life," She replied, "Maybe next time when the group is smaller than I'll consider it but not this time okay?" She asked

"Fine. I'll grab some more food than," He said

"Hey Megs you busy cause I really need to talk to you," I said

"About what I'm all ears." She said lighting the fire

"Not here it has something to do with last night remember?" I asked

"You sure that now is a good time for that I mean everybody is having fun and relaxing maybe we should handle this tomorrow." She said

"No, it has to be today it doesn't have to be now but it has to be before midnight," I said

"Why before midnight? What's so imported about today anyway?" She asked

"It's her birthday," I said before walking to the lake

I spent the rest the day wearing my mask of fake smiles and half-hearted laughter it was just different compared to how I used to do it. The cracks of how I truly felt would somehow come through when I went swimming with DJ I saw something at the bottom of the lake calling to me. I swam deeper and deeper under the water only to lose track of where I was before getting pulled back by DJ. After a while, I just laid on the grass watching everything go by.

"So what did you see under the water?" Megan asked laying beside me

"DJ you rat," I muttered under my breath

"Tell me. It's not like you've been acting normal today anyway some people are worried about you, I'm worried about you. Despite today being her birthday you're taking this calmly, a little too calmly like before the storm clam. Have you seen her or heard from her?" She asked

"No, not today which is actually liberating I just don't know how to feel about it since I saw her yesterday," I said

"What?" Megan asked sitting up staring at me

I didn't even have to look at her to know she was disappointed in me it was some time after I started teaching I stopped seeing and hearing Maria I was improving health wise to the point where I saw Megan as herself still I was sure how I honestly felt about her even though I trusted her more than anyone. By not telling her that I saw Maria again it was a step back at least that's how she saw it so her reaction really didn't surprise me.

"Nothing triggered it. I didn't lose control and I barely respond still I'd kill for a chance to actually say goodbye and I think today would be perfect for it," I said getting up

"Okay, let's say goodbye," Megan said

"Excuse me? What do you mean by that?" I asked

"Well, you've told me all that you could about your wife and your past life I think I know her just as well as you do so...I have the right to say goodbye as well." She said

"I guess I just need to grab a few things then we can go," I said going back to the tents

When I came out the tent Rock and Megan was talking about something that made Megan clearly uncomfortable as Rock reached out toward her she'd refused, crossing her arms taking a step back but he kept pressing forward grabbing her arm and forcing his hand into hers. She took her arm back while it looked like he was getting more and more mad about something but it was when he pointed at the tents in his ramblings that made her slap him and walk away that made me realized that he was talking about me. I quickly went back inside only to act like I was just coming out without a clue of what just happened and there was pretending nothing ever happened with a smile on her face holding up two canteens filled to the brim with water. We walked for a while away from camp far enough so no one else would hear us but close enough to find our way back without any trouble while Megan sat down to enjoy the breeze I was digging a hole after that I gently placed the camera on the ground as long side the dull dirty old knife that I'd use as an alarm to wake me from the terrors that haunt me and a necklace that I didn't even tell Megan about so it wasn't shocking when she started asking me about it.

"Details about this," She said holding it up

"It's something I should have been got rid over," I said

"Where is it from?" She asked

"Promise me you won't get angry with me," I said

"Why would I get mad at you?" She asked

"Just Promise Me!" I yelled

"Okay okay, I promise I won't get angry alright?" She asked

"I always knew my full name, Erica Tobias Weston. I never gave you guys the full story about me and I'm sorry for that I just didn't know how you guy would react to having me around there's only enough battery life for one more video and I want you to see it," I said

"Why me?" She asked

"Because I trust you with knowing who I used to be," I said giving her the camera

She looked concerned for a moment at me before slowly opening up the camera. I sat down a few steps away from her as the video started there were pauses the occasional look from the camera to me as each revelation became more and more apparent. I kept my head down staring at the hole I had dug as I listened to it in silence. After a while, Megan slowly sat down by my side in disbelief hesitated to ask the question on her mind as she wiped her eyes looking and thinking for the right words to say.

"I did it for her you know? All of it because after that I would've stopped, I was planning on running away with her. Travel the world watch her live her dreams as a dancer I never opened up to you about how I used to live my "life" before I met Maria you know that I was, in other words, taking in by some people, not the "family" I thought I'd be apart of but they housed me clothed feed and forced training on me. I didn't want to be a part of that organization but like I said day after day of getting my ass beat like a damaged dog I had no choice but to conform to what they wanted me to be to survive. And what they wanted and got was a mindless emotionless systematic demonic sadist masochist murder. I never wanted anyone to see the worse of me and parts of myself that I hate more than anything I have ever hated before, I get if you want to leave just go back to camp but I gotta take the camera from you," I said still looking away

"I'm not leaving and I'm not mad I...I feel sorry for you just answer these questions I have. Did you know this would be the outcome?" She asked

"No, if I knew about this outcome I would've thought about it more the money is worthless now and if it did still have its value it wouldn't have meaning because she's gone. The reason for me even considering the job was to support her and our life together," I answered

"Do you regret it?" She asked

"Like I said my reason for all of this was for her, I didn't care about the world around me to think about the consequences of my actions most times when I dealt with politicians everybody would be so quick to move on Roan was the first person anyone has ever given a fuck about! I regret it but only because Maria got hurt if she was still alive then I don't know what we would've done," I said

"During the aftermath when you watched the video first the first time how did you..." She started

"I didn't. Trust me I tried to die through various different means but I'd see her and somehow I conceived myself that she'd want me to find the person who did it and take revenge but I know that's not her it was my selfish reason to keep living and my selfish reason to keep moving but now I can let that go." I said putting the camera in the hole

"What about the knife?" She asked

I looked at the old rusty blade with a slight grin, "This was the first knife I got from the man who abused me through all manners and means the night before I had to kill him. He destroyed my idea of humanity in its entirety all the way down to the basic way humans interact or think for that matter. My home life wasn't exactly for the faint of heart it was a tier system divided up into four classes; the heads of the household whose words were law within those walls and since they were never good people the 'laws' they made reflected that, next up were the parental figurers, teachers, masters, creators whatever term you can use to describe a higher authority his name was Jacob Jehovah the ironic name I know especially since the family never believe in God. Most the family found refuge in saintism but majority of them were atheist." I explained

"What about you?" She asked

"I didn't believe any either one. I believed in purgatory forever wondering in darkness to evil for heaven to submissive for hell I'd have no choice but face all my demons so I didn't bother to think of a life outside that one. The next one is where I fit in the children, students, helpers, the created when they found me I cut one of the 'parents' trying to steal food after trying to run off they found drugged and kidnapped me. They said I was to ruthless to be the last tier so they took me in as part of the family broke me down built me up got rid of everything that made me normal and turned me into a heartless assassin but I'd rather be that than the last and final tier." I said

"What's the last tier?" She asked

I couldn't speak it was the worst thing I had ever taken part of. I was completely shattered and broken at the time to the point where nothing worked anymore. It was something that I blocked out my mind completely someone I destroyed completely. I unknowingly project myself onto this innocent victim only to make them feel the same pain I endured but even worse because their suffering made me feel alive again.

"The help slaves play things and toys for torment. They did everything included loan money well being a loan shark more like it the rates would shoot up immediately after the short time limit passed after a while they wouldn't want money they'd want flesh. I'd rather not talk about the process of how that works at least not now but it was ruthless. I was ruthless. I never really gave her a name after I left I made her property of the house never looking back after that." I said staring at the knife before grabbing my hair and cutting off the pony tail before throwing both in the hole

"And the necklace?" She questioned while I fluffed out my hair

"It belonged to her father a man who traded her away to save his own life. He promised her that he'd come back for her one day turns out the wasn't gonna happened because one of my last jobs in that house was to kill him. I did and threw the memory of him at her feet before burning up the picture of them he kept in his wallet. I'm glad you didn't meet that me, I went by the name Tobias than sharing the same name as my father who actually turned himself in to give me a chance at a better life funny how that worked out." I said

"I don't think this is what he had in mind for you Erica," She said

"Don't You Think I Realized That And Yet...and yet I can't let it go but now I feel like for once I can finally put it to rest thanks to you." I said tossing the necklace in the hole

"So is this really the final goodbye?" She asked

I grabbed the shovel and started covering the hole after that I kneeled down doing the one thing I never did before looking at Megan for help and a little guidance I prayed to some sort of God asking for forgiveness begging really for strengthen to keep moving on for all my mistakes to be cast away for those I have killed to rest in peace and for those who live with me to be happy and protected from my crimes I carry with me. I stood up looking at the sunset with actual hope for the future for once I found the place where I belonged. After enjoying the warmth of the rest of the sun me and Megan headed back to camp to our dismay.

"TOBIAS!"

"Oh my god it's her."