After finding out we had a meet coming up the whole atmosphere in the camp changed. Team mates became competitors and friends became foes. I knew from experience how quickly Emily could swim and I seriously had to up my game. For the first time I didn't want to spend all of my time with her. When I was back at Danby I would spend the whole day before a meet trying to get pumped and in the zone. I would shut myself off from the world including Pru. Luckily she was the kind of friend that understood and didn't take offence from this.
The first swim session of the day was full on but It was necessary to improve my technique. Coach Carter certainly knew how to push us hard. We started with a 500m warm up and then went onto a technique workout whereby every length would be a different stroke. We then moved onto sprint workouts this is where we practise going at different speeds in the water. If you are swimming in a competition you would swim far slower in the first heat than in the final where you would be going as fast as physically possible. Finally we finished with a 500m warm down, I couldn't remember the last time my muscled had burned so much and this was just the beginning.
Zoe blew on her whistle to get our attention "Girls, do you want an extra session this morning? That was a hard push by Carter" She called out.
"I have some stuff to think about, is it ok if I go shower?" Emily added. Clearly she had to go think about Samara, I was sick of the hold that girl had over Emily.
"And you Paige?" Zoe questioned.
"I'm not really feeling it today" I muttered.
"Paige would you mind coming to my office once you've changed? I have some paper work for you to fill out" Zoe said with one of her beaming smiles.
"Sure" I nodded unsure of what she was going on about.
Emily and I both headed towards the locker room to shower and change. "McCullers are you nervous" Emily said whilst tilting her head.
"Nervous of?" I questioned.
"The meet on Wednesday, the one where I kick your ass?" Emily said with a giggle.
I softly punched her in the arm "Wait and see Em, wait and see. I'm going to bring my A game!" I said competitively.
We both headed for separate shower cubicles. I didn't know where to look when she took her swimming costume off in front of me. As much as I wanted to look I averted my eyes. She must know how much that affects me? I went into the shower still wearing my costume, I turned the water on piping hot and let out a sigh of relief. She was naked inches away from me, even with the heat of the water the heat in my core was unmatched. I quickly washed my hair and body and got dressed, knowing that if I saw Emily I wouldn't be able to control myself.
I didn't actually know where Zoe's office was or that she even had an office. I made my way to Coach Carter's hoping it would be in the same area. Carter's office was on a narrow corridor and there was a door opposite his with a light on. I knocked lightly and prayed it was the correct room.
"Come in"
"Hello Paige, take a seat" Zoe said politely, she looked completely different with black rimmed glasses on.
"You said I had paper work?" I questioned.
"Paige McCullers I can tell when something is up with you….during practise you didn't once space out whilst staring at Emily. Come on spill?" Zoe said whilst glaring at me over her glasses.
"Oh nothing really, I just want to win this meet so badly and Emily is far better than I am" I said quietly, I hated admitting this but it was the truth.
"Don't be so hard on yourself Paige. You have star quality and If you work hard you will become a world beater. Here." Zoe handed me a piece of paper.
"I made one for you and Emily it is a workout programme but you can have yours a little early".
"Thank you and there is something else…Emily's girlfriend wants her back in the US and I can't let that happen" I said calmly.
"Oh wow seriously? I can have a discreet chat with her. Are you ok? She said with a hint of worry in her voice.
"I will be If she stays, I can't let myself think about her leaving" I said bluntly.
"Paige when you're not staring at her she's staring at you. I see it everyday, Just talk to her. If that's everything I really need to finish my write up of the teams progress" Zoe groaned.
Later on in the evening whilst relaxing on my bed back in my room with Emily. I received a text message from Whitney this instantly put a smile back on my face. "American! You actually text me I'm impressed. You need to let me know when you are released for the day from prison USA. I would really like to see you again x".
"Wow Paige you look happy" Emily said with a raised eyebrow.
"Just a text from Whitney" I accidentally blurted out. I had been avoiding this conversation.
"Whitney?" she asked.
"The girl from Berlin?" I said with a sigh.
"That you kissed...oh" Emily went from looking across the room at me to looking at the wall at the bottom of her bed.
There was a long awkward silence. I tried to speak but the words refused to roll from the end of my tongue.
"Are you...together?" she said her eyes were still fixed to the wall.
"No, that was the first time we met" as soon as those words left my lips I wanted to die.
"Do you do that a lot" this time she looked directly at me.
"What? No...that was my first...kiss" I said nervously.
"Really? You looked really into it?" She probed further.
"I'm sorry that you had to find out in that way".
"Oh no it's fine, it's great in fact, I'm glad everything is going so well" Emily said whilst putting on a grey zip up hoody.
"I erm need to go talk to Zoe about something, don't wait up" Emily muttered.
"Why?..." the door slammed before I could say why would you be late back. That was a weird turn of events.
I sat up and sat on my bed with my head in my hands. I couldn't deal with this awkwardness from Emily. I just wanted to tell her how I felt but the thought of being rejected terrified me. Everything would change, how could we share a room? how could we swim together? It was weird that she had only started acting really awkwardly around me since she saw me share the kiss. That very night we had a fight about Samara, then she was crying about Samara and now she's stormed off because of Whitney. When I said I needed her to stay that stopped her crying and when we were just talking about Whitney she couldn't even look at me. I have to be imagining this because there is no way somebody as beautiful and elegant as Emily could like somebody like me. I must be misreading the signs of friendship after all I've only ever had Pru.
I spent the rest of the evening in the pool and gym. I wanted to work on my endurance so I did 100 lengths in the pool. I feel like If I don't put some real distance in the pool that I will lose my conditioning which I had spent so much of my life perfecting. I did some work with a pool buoy so I was just working on my arms whilst my legs were afloat. I then hit the gym and followed the exercise plan Zoe had worked on for me. It involved building up my endurance by using the treadmill and bike machine. Then I finished off with some tricep extensions with dumbbells.
I returned to my room like a zombie, muscled ached that hadn't ached in a very long time. I slept like a baby that night forgetting all about my troubles with Emily. When I woke up the next morning Emily's bed was empty and it didn't look like it had been slept in. I quickly jumped up and checked her chest of draws for her belongings. I automatically thought she had gone back to America. Did she not sleep here because I kissed Whitney? She didn't sit with me at breakfast and swam at the opposite end of the pool to me during practise. I was thankful that coach had arranged a light swim session for the day before a meet.
The evening before our mini meet soon came around. I took my ipod with me and headed to the pool. Not to swim but focus on the upcoming race. I sat on the pools edge with my feet dangling into the water, the song send me down by Haim was blasting into my ears. I was surprised when Emily took a seat next to me on the pools edge "Paige!" I could see her lips move. Her pink luscious full lips.
"Hello Paige!" she called out again.
I couldn't block out her muffled voice forever so I pulled out my headphones "What's up Em?"
"I'm sorry" She whispered.
"For what?" I questioned.
"The way I've been acting recently. I was jealous of Whitney" her big brown eyes were enchanting.
"yo...you... you were?" the shock of what Emily had just revealed caused me to stutter.
"I thought I knew you and you let your walls down straight away with Whitney...I just want to get to know you Paige, we get on so well and it hurt me that you didn't tell me you were gay. I want to know your story" Emily said whilst placing her hand on mine.
"What do you want to know?" I said and held her hand.
"My first crush was Beyoncé... I remember seeing her performing and in music videos back with Destiny's child. I couldn't keep my eyes off her beautiful toned long legs and I was mesmerised by her. My friends and I would watch music videos together. Hanna always used to comment on how hot the guys were I used to force myself to nod in agreement" Emily said with a wide smile on her lips.
"How did you come out?" I admired how open Emily was with me.
"It was relatively easy with my friends they guessed they kind of came out to me...Hanna had always wanted a gay best friend. They have always been great about the whole thing. When people at school found out and gave me a hard time Spencer was like my pet Rottweiler then people moved on, it became old news. My parents were a different story though my mom wanted to send me to a correctional facility but now she has come around and my dad has supported me no matter what" Emily was now giving me a look of encouragement.
"Well, I had a huge crush on one of my swim team mates back in high school her name was Abi and back then I though she was a goddess. I used to turn up really early to swim practise just so I could swim in the lane next to hers. I had it bad but the battle I was having with myself was worse. Nobody wants to be different we just want to be "normal" and I didn't think I was normal" I had never been so honest about the whole situation before it felt good to get it off my chest. Emily kept her eyes fixed on mine the entire time.
"I was sort of forced out in high school, there were rumours and everybody found out about my crush on Abi. I had a really hard time with bullying...I gave back as hard as I got and once that happened they left me alone. Completely alone I only had my best friend Pru in my life" I stopped and tried not to react to Emily's touch, she broke her hand away from mine and rubbed my back. I missed a breath and felt my heart begin to flutter.
"The first person I came out to was our doorman for our apartment. I had been friends with Fredrick for years, we would always chat when I came home from school. He would sometimes bring me candy and I would occasionally bring him coffee. We could chat for hours, he would tell me all about his wife and grandchildren. He mentioned that his grandson was gay and how proud he was of him and it felt right to drop it into conversation. He hugged me but suggested finding the right way to tell my deeply religious parents" I couldn't help but smile at the thought of Fred it was strange that I missed him more than my parents.
"That's awesome Paige...I'm so happy that we've swapped stories" that sounded so cheesy.
"Do they know now?" She asked inquisitively.
"Oh yeah! I told them the morning that I left for Germany"
"OMG!" Emily gasped.
"I didn't know how they were going to take the news so I dropped the bomb and ran for my life...its all fine I had an email from my dad saying they already knew and that they both love me and always will" I said gleefully.
"That is one interesting technique for coming out but I'm glad it worked. Thanks for this Paige" She placed her arm around my shoulder.
"No Emily thank you I've not told anybody about that stuff before and it felt good. I have my work cut out in our race tomorrow so I'm going to head to bed" I said whilst swinging my legs out of the water.
"I'll race you" Emily said, she was already on her feet and running towards the door.
Hey guys I'm sorry about the wait I made this chapter longer to make up for it. I will update as often as I can but I don't have as much time to spare anymore :(.
Cici: I would go with options 1,2 and 4 pursue both girls and break Emily up with Samara. Paige is a superhero so the ladies should be lining up :) they finally had a little chat about Whitney I hope thats how you envisaged it...The green eyed monster deffo played with Emily.
Ruthie92: Hey thanks for the review. Emily should see how much of a lost cause Samara is, Is a girl really worth giving up your dreams for. Should she even ask for Emily to do that? The only person worth giving it up for is Paige but I'm biased ;) I added in more Zoe just for you.
Pailylover: You are so right about Emily and this chapter has dropped in a few more little hints about Emily's true feelings for Paige. Samara had been there for Emily and Emily always sees the good in people...even when we don't lol. The drama of the swim meet will be in the next chapter, I want to do it justice and keep everyone guessing about the result :)