For my third and last year of high school I dared to ask my dad if I could assist to a different one, one near home, one where I didn't have to live in, he said ok and sent me to a high school at my hometown.
This was a big deal, that meant my dad was feeling better. He sent me far away because my mum left him. I reminded him too much of her, so, he got rid of me.
On vacation I hanged out a bit with him and his girlfriend, an architect 8 year younger than him that made awesome pancakes. But mostly I hanged out by myself. Being around my home felt weird after so much time, after so much story. I felt like a kid again.
When the time of getting back to school arrived I had made up my mind. I was going to be a well behaved student and I was going to get a girl and have a serious relationship and shit.
The first day went ok, I met nice people, I had nice teachers, It was nice to have a fresh start. But something didn't want me accomplish my plans.
On my first class I sat next to a girl who was quietly playing with her pen. She was slim and tall, really pale, with brown greenish eyes and prominent cheek bones. She was smiling to herself.
"Hi! Is this seat taken?" I asked,trying to start conversation.
"Nope, I don't think so" She looked at me with curiosity. "Are you new?"
With that few words was enough to know she was really cool. Her name was Leslie Green. She enjoyed making people mad and causing mischief. She was really smart and a total misfit who was proud of being that. She would use flannel shirts that were like 4 sizes bigger than they should and ripped skinny jeans. Secretly, she was really sweet, a total dreamer, but she liked being a bad girl.
Together we went to smoke joints on a hidden tree, to get drunk anywhere and all kinds of destroying activities, but rare enough, we also went to museums, music festivals and peaceful things every parent would be happy to know their kid did for pleasure.
She was my best friend, she still is. She was the only person I trusted. She knew most of my life and I knew most of hers. We both had our secrets, that sooner than later came to evidence.
Bianca McLorin was a girl I liked. She was in my drama class and I thought she was alright. She had ebony hair, dark blue eyes and red lips. I don't really remember that much of her, only that I thought she could be a nice girlfriend. She was pretty average.
One day Leslie waited for me after my lesson and she saw me talking to Bianca. Afterwards she made a lot of questions about her, I told her everything I knew. Suddenly, I started to find it weird that Leslie showed up when I had drama, because, she used to pick me up sometimes, but at that time, it was every single class.
Bianca finally got all the signs that I had been sending telling that I liked her. She kissed me when everyone was leaving. Leslie saw us from her usual place, sitting on the floor, waiting for me. I'll never forget her face, her eyes and mouth wide open. A tear falling down her cheek. She got up as fast as humanly possible and ran away. Everything happened so quickly that I couldn't react.
That day Bianca became my first girlfriend ever.
I couldn't find Leslie anywhere. She wasn't at school, nor at her house or the park. I found her at the tree where we smoked. She was crying, her pretty face was bright red and full of tear stains.
"What happend with Bianca?" She said as greeting.
I told the truth. She said something like "Oh cool" and then walked away. I tried to follow but she got mad. She yelled me to fuck off. I got offended.
"What's your fucking problem? Why are you so jealous of her?" I screamed.
"Do you want me? Is that it?"
She looked at me with embarrassment. "You don't get a thing, you fucking virgin" She said calmly. She walked away and I did too.
We didn't talked to each other for months. In which my relationship with Bianca got more formal and serious. It was ok if you don't count that I cheated on her anytime I had the chance. Turns out I grew bored of her quickly and my neighbor was pretty fit. My idea of having a truthful relationship was falling apart. I enjoyed sex too much to just quit. She somehow found out, she broke up with me saying
"You are mean"
After that, Leslie and her turned best friends. That pissed me off, A LOT. I tried to talk about it with Leslie. She told me to fuck off; again.
One day, they stopped hanging out. I found Leslie crying on the tree; again. I went to comfort her.
"What's wrong Leslie?" I said, hugging her.
Turns out Leslie didn't like me. She liked Bianca, but she was too embarrassed to admit she was a lesbian so, she let me think we were mad at each other because she fancied me.
Turns out Bianca was a bit homophobic. When Leslie finally got over all the self-hate and confessed her feelings Bianca acted mean. She told the whole school my friend was in love with her, like it was a really funny joke. School didn't give a crap about it but Leslie felt really bad. That's how get secret got leaked.
What Bianca did got my nerves, She needed a lesson. What I did was quite simple. From our almost non existent sex life, we filmed a video, one were she acted like a fool. She punched me in the face accidentally, she fell over... She was really bad. That was a video that I sent to everyone I knew. That was something the whole school laughed at and that made girls want me. That's how my secret was leaked and I went back to my old habits.
Leslie went back to being my best friend. The girl that I trust completely. The girl that keeps me on track. Every time I'm about to act mean with a girl, I'll remember her teary eyes and her shaky voice saying:
"I would give my sight to have her in my arms but I can't. And then there are boys like you, who don't know what they have."