"I hate that jet!"

Onslaught slammed his energon cube onto the table with ringing force, sending cracks up along its sides. The other Combaticons flinched.

"Well then, let's forget about this stupid prank and rip Skywarp's wings off!" Brawl snarled.

"Ooh! I call kicking his helm off his shoulder struts!" Vortex cackled.

"So then Starscream can blast us to pieces," Swindle commented, "No thanks. Besides, I need Skywarp for the time being. He and I have an," the con-mech paused, "agreement of sorts."

"We couldn't care less about your business endeavors, Swindle," Blast Off snorted, "You're a Combaticon first, entrepreneur second!"

Onslaught ex- vented with a pneumatic hiss.

"Let's just get this over with," the missile truck stood and walked over to the Stunticons who were sitting on the opposite side of the Rec, muttering to himself as he crossed the room, "slagging waste of time. Can't believe I agreed to this. Fragging Skywarp roping me into this mess."

The other Combaticons flanked Onslaught as they approached the Stunticon table. The rowdy cars began to notice the Combaticons and slowly fell into an icy glaring contest with the opposing gesalt team. The Combaticons stopped several mini-inches away from the table, glaring down at the Stunticons.

Motormaster stood, leaning threateningly over the table.

"What do you want?" the cargo truck snarled.

"We come with a message from Skywarp," Onslaught responded, crossing his arms over his broad chassis.

"If that trans-fluid sucking Seeker thinks that he can send you five freaks to scare us, then he's got another thing coming to him," Motormaster hissed through gritted dentae.

The room became deadly cold and silent as both gesalts bristled, ready to attack.

Yelling and screeching could be heard coming from down the hall. The Rec opened and both Starscream and Soundwave barged into the room, heading straight for the energon dispensers.

"You lying glitch!" Starscream screeched as Soundwave filled a cube, "I know it was you! And stop denying it!"

Soundwave turned back to the Air Commander.

"Eat a spike, Starscream," the Communications Officer intoned, then brushed past the stunned Seeker and out the door.

Starscream quickly recovered.

"You insubordinate, cassette- coddling, glitch- faced, CARRIER FRAGGER!"

He took off after Soundwave, leaving the gesalts to their standoff.

The room was still palpably cold as they glared.

Minutes stretched thin as they tensed, ready to attack.

Onslaught gave off an amused snort.

"What's so funny?" Motormaster howled, his team jumping to their pedes.

"Don't you want to at least hear what Skywarp has to say?" Onslaught asked innocently, "After all, it could be important."

"Yeah," Motormaster sneered dryly, "So important that he sent the reject gesalt instead of the deformed Seekers."

The Combaticons bristled.

"Watch what you say about us," Onslaught warned, "it will come back to haunt you."

"Is that a threat?"

"Merely a word of caution," Onslaught airily waved his hand.

The signal beeped in Onslaught's internal comm. His mission was complete. Without another word, he turned and walked away from the Stunticons.

"Hey!" Wildrider called to them, "Come back here and fight like mechs, you cowards!"

The Combaticons halted a few steps away from the door.

"Don't frag with us, reject Autobots," Blast Off growled dangerously.

They left without another glance back at the thunderous faceplates of the Stunticons.

The Stunticons fell back into their chairs.

"I hate those guys," Dragstrip huffed.

"Tell us something we don't know," Dead End deadpanned.

"What were they going to tell us?" Breakdown asked, shivering.

"Who knows," Motormaster rolled his optics and lifted his cube to drink, "But I can tell you that I'm getting pretty sick of Skywarp."

"Amen to that!"

The other Stunticons copied Motormaster and lifted their drinks in a casual toast. They tipped their helms back, lifting the energon to their waiting intakes.

At that precise moment, Rumble and Frenzy ran into the Rec and straight to their allies with fearful expressions on their faces.

"WAIT!" the two cassettes bellowed to the hungry gesalt.

The Stunticons threw back their cubes of energon is two gulps and then slammed their cubes back onto the table with bemused expressions. This energon tasted funny. Had it gone bad?

Breakdown screamed first.

Within seconds, the entire gesalt was shrieking and leaping around, gasping for cold air as their systems burned as if molten metal had been poured into their tanks.

"AHHHH! WHAT IS THIS?!" Motormaster screamed.

"WE'VE BEEN POISIONED!" Breakdown yelped.

"Need—Energon!" Wildrider gasped, and nabbed an empty cube by the dispenser.

It filled with a satisfying hiss, and the Ferrari gratefully gulped it down.

His teammates, seeing his faceplate of relief, did the same.

Within moments, they renewed their howling, the pitches rising to an earsplitting squeal.

"IT BURNS!"

"PRIMUS MAKE IT STOP!"

"SO HOT!"

"I CAN'T FEEL MY GLOSSA!"

"WE'RE GOING TO DIE!"

Finally, they collapsed from the pain.

Frenzy turned to Rumble.

"You can take them to Med- Bay."

Onslaught and his Combaticons couldn't help laughing as Skywarp and the Coneheads showed tem the results of their prank on a handheld monitor, broadcasting live thanks to some hidden cameras that the Coneheads had planted in the Rec.

The Stunticons fainted, much to the group's amusement.

After they recovered, Onslaught turned to the teleporter.

"I must admit, Skywarp," the Combaticon leader complemented, "Your strategy to use us as a diversion while you planted the special sauce was unexpectedly brilliant!"

Skywarp puffed out his chassis proudly.

"Of course it was brilliant!" Skywarp said with his best Starscream Smirk™*, "That's why I am the Mighty Skywarp!"

The room fell silent as they stared at the purple Seeker.

"What?" he asked.

"You need to stop hanging out with Starscream, mech," Thrust said.

"If I didn't hang out with him, I couldn't get clearance to go out and find the ingredients for the special sauce!" Skywarp defended himself.

"What's in that stuff, anyway?" asked Brawl.

"Oh, 700 Carolina Reapers, 200 cups of wasabi, 400 Ghost Peppers, I forgot how many Scorpion Peppers, some chili oil, curry powder, and a sprig of mint!" he listed happily.

"Why the mint?" asked Dirge.

"So they smell fresh!" Skywarp grinned.

"Considerate," Blast Off growled moodily.

Skywarp's faceplates nearly split in two from the size of his grin.

XXXXXXXXX

Hook knew it was going to be a long day when Rumble and Frenzy miraculously managed to drag Motormaster into the Med- Bay.

"I have a feeling I'm going to need a lot of high- grade after I hear this," the Medic growled.

*Skywarp is not The Mighty Starscream LLC. The use of copyrighted material by Skywarp is unintentional and is used for non- profit imitation and entertainment only. Skywarp claims fair use.