Chapter III:

Ron

Saturday morning came sooner than Ron would have liked. Not that he regretted his decision to stay behind in New York City. Who would have thought he'd ever go to a convention for pixies? Not Ron. Rufus might have, though. He has quite the imagination.

Ron had to get up even earlier than Kim so he could meet Haley and Jake's friends downtown before the convention started. The streets were busy with early morning commuters, but Ron had an easy enough time navigating on foot. He and Rufus even picked up some Bueno Nacho on the way, but as soon as Rufus finished his share he crawled into Ron's pocket and probably fell asleep. Which was fair. Rufus had stayed up pretty late last night playing the newest installment of his new favorite video game series. Some sort of grave-destroying arcade-type game that Ron couldn't keep interest in past the first two games.

They met up with Haley at a southern entrance to the park. She was quick to give a nice hello before telling him, "You're a little early. Trixie and Spud are still on their way."

Ron gulped down the last of his nachos and threw the trash in a nearby can. "What's a Spud?"

Just then, two teenagers, probably Jake's age, rolled up to them across the pavement. One was a tall, pale, and skinny guy on a skate board and wearing a beanie even though it was a relatively warm day, and a girl with a shorter skate board, natural hair pulled into a bun, and a white panda shirt that sharply contrasted her skin. The girl stepped to the ground, kicked her board into her hand, and greeted Haley with, "Hey there, Girl-Fires, how's the scales growing?"

None of this made any sense to Ron, but Haley easily responded, "Good morning to you too, Trixie.
Good morning, Spu- Spud?"

Everyone turned to look at Spud, who hadn't so much stopped his board next to them as much as it had happened to roll to a stop there. His head was slumped to one shoulder and his eyes were closed.

"Yo!" Trixie shouted and gave him a shove. "Spudinski, wake up!"

Spud swayed with the shove and his eyes stayed closed but he said, "I'm awake, I'm just not..." he trailed off with a huge yawn. Ron wondered if the smell of hot-dog was coming from him or a vendor down the street that just wasn't in his line of sight. "...I'm just...sleeping..."

"Spud, you can't multi-task consciousness."

"Watch me."

Trixie rolled her eyes so hard her head wobbled. She pulled Spud off his board by the shirt collar and his stumble popped his eyes open. He looked like he was about to close them again and continue what he was doing from solid ground this time until he saw Ron. Then he just stood there with his mouth part-way open and a finger half pointed in Ron's direction like he wasn't entirely sure if what he was looking at was real. Ron recognized the look from what a lot of Kim's fans wore, but it was rarely directed at him.

Spud's staring attracted Trixie's attention. "You must be Ron," she said. "I'm Trixie, this here's Spud."

Spud waved a hand a little and said, "Hey."

"You're name's Spud?"

Trixie said, "Don't ask."

"You're name's Stoppable," Spud said before stepping forward and shaking Ron's hand with both of his. "Big fan of you and Kim's work, by the way. You're exploits are to be admired. Also, what are the odds you can get Kim to sign my original Team Possible action figures?"

"A-nd we're walking," Trixie said, grabbing Spud by the back of the shirt and half-dragging him into the park.

"Thanks again for helping out today, Ron," Haley said as if everything that had just happened was absolutely normal, so Ron decided it was okay to roll with it.

"Oh, no problem," Ron said. "I mean, I'm no dragon or wizard or anything, but I've got some skills." Ron mimed some punches for visual aid.

"Well hopefully you won't need any of them." Haley began following Trixie and Spud into the park and Ron walked next to her. "If we go about everything diplomatically, there shouldn't be any need for any sort of skillz." Haley rolled her eyes similarly to the way Kim would when speaking about her own brothers, and Ron was absolutely certain that she'd said "skills" with a "z."

When they came up to construction signs posted in the middle of the pathway, they walked around they strolled past them, Haley giving a nod and a friendly wave to the "construction workers" sitting around next to the signs. Ron was pretty sure he saw one of the guys blink a few too many times in one blink. They rounded a bank of trees and the set-up of the pixie's convention finally came into view.

The convention was very...tiny. Ron hadn't put a lot of thought into the whole "pixie" part of the equation in when he was building up a mental image beforehand. The real thing was actually very similar to what he'd pictured, just smaller. There were booths and attractions set up by pixies from all over the country; at least one for each state and two for Texas. What he didn't expect was the way stalls and booths were stacked on top of one another. Some had so many layers that the towers had to be held up with some kind of pixie dust or leaned against a tree. Pixies who were working the convention were flying up and down the towers, readying their things and arguing about whether or not the snack stand should be stacked on top of the native paintings stand, where the tiny blobs of ketchup might fall and ruin a priceless piece.

They simply stood there and surveyed everything for a few beats, Haley waving a brief greeting to some of the pixies from a distance, before Ron asked, "So what is our job, exactly?"

"Well, dragons are looked to as leaders," Haley explained in an almost textbook voice. "By attending these events, we can help settle complicated and touchy decisions as well as promote our own leadership over the magical community."

"Kind of like magical politicians," Trixie simplified.

"Yeah, fire-breathing peacekeepers with scales and wicked teeth," Spud said, holding his fingers in front of his mouth like a five year old might mime vampire fangs. Trixie thumped him in the elbow.

"O-kay." Ron surveyed the convention grounds. The space wasn't actually that big, but because the pixies were so small, it may as well have been five square miles. "How do we do that, exactly?"

"Well last year Jake just sat up on the bridge and threatened to torch anyone that didn't get along, but I was hoping this year we could go for a more," she tapped her fingertips together, "civil approach."

Ron caught Trixie rolling her eyes.

For the most part, the "civil approach" worked well. Haley had no issues organizing conferences, open question panels, and general social disputes so that everyone could walk away at least with a better understanding of the other side. Pixies however, much like humans, were not always a social species.

Early Day One, the pixies had started a tournament of a game that seemed to be a mixture of lacrosse, football, and quittitch. Trixie and Spud had tried to explain the concept and the rules to Ron, and he understood most of it. Some of the finer details were lost on him though. He just couldn't understand why there needed to be seven goal posts or how they managed to create a game in which three teams participated at once.

It had started innocent enough, but soon the team from Florida and the team from Ohio had gotten into some argument about cheating and everything was blown into a mess. Haley, bless her heart, did her best to quell the fighting, but sports weren't exactly here field of expertise. Instead, Spud had stepped up and called for a fight to the finish between the two teams' best players. ("Finish" was quickly defined as a pixie touching the ground, rather than being beaten unconscious. Some of the pixies seemed disappointed, but Trixie was very insistent.) The tournament had been going on relatively well since then, as the "Fight to the Finish" was soon implemented as the go-to method for weeding out cheaters.

Wade called at some point between lunch and dinner. Ron didn't remember much of the conversation - some of the younger pixies got caught sabotaging each other's booths and somewhere in the ruckus a tent caught fire so he was a little pre-occupied - and he later got a call from Kim explaining that she and Jake wouldn't be getting back until tomorrow. She insisted both of them were okay, but her brother's plane was trashed. She assured him that she was fine and said she'd explain more when they got back.

Sunday morning was much less eventful. The game tournament was still going on, but it was Trixie's turn to keep an eye on them. Haley was with the diplomats, deep in some conversation about ancient pixie lore and history, and Spud was hanging around the patch of grass where the younger pixies could run and fly around and play. Ron decided to simply take his time wandering the convention space, trying not to step on anyone. When he came back around to Spud, he was letting a group of the kids play around on his longboard (Spud and Trixie insist that it is not just a skateboard there is definitely a difference). They seemed to be using it as a pirate ship, if the "Arrg!"s and the "Ey, matie!"s were anything to go off of.

Ron was watching some of the children mess around with Rufus, laughing and trying to figure out what he was, when he was distracted by a group of nervous looking kids. They stood in a little huddle underneath a tree, whispering to each other. They looked up as Ron approached. "Hey, what's wrong little guys?" he asked. He'd learned the day before that "little guys" was a phrase that was only okay to use with pixie children. The adults did not appreciate it.

"Ch-charlie is..." A blue pixie exchanged nervous glances with his friends. "We were just messing around! We wanted to see who could fly the highest, we didn't want any trouble!"

"I believe you, it's okay," Ron tried to reassure them. "What happened?"

"Charlie flew all the way up there," a pink one said, pointing a tiny hand towards the tree above them. "But she's too tired to come down and none of us can fly that high."

Sure enough, Ron could make out a little blue sparkle clinging to one of the high branches that must have been Charlie. "Can't you just call your families?" he asked the other kids.

Several of them frantically responded at the same time with, "No!" The pink one said, "They'll think we did it on purpose! Charlie's family doesn't like our family..."

"But we like Charlie," a blue one said. "If her parents think we did something bad, we won't be able to hang out anymore."

Ron looked up again, gauging the height of the tree branch where he could still see Charlie. "I'll go get her," he said.

"Really?"

"Really really?"

"Sure! It's not that high."

Okay, it was a little high. Like, out of regular human jumping range, high. Suck it up, Stoppable, he told himself. Kim's climbed higher, and so have you. Ron took several paces back before heading at the tree at a run. He managed several steps up the trunk before leaping up to grab the branch. Charlie let out a squeal as it shook under the weight, but in a flash, Ron had swung himself up and over to crouch carefully next to her.

Charlie was shaking when he scooped her into his hands. "You alright?" She nodded frantically, a ghost of gratitude sneaking onto her face. She held his thumb tight between warm, spindly arms.

"Here," he carefully moved her into his Rufus' normal pocket. "Hold on tight."

The other pixie children scurried out of the way before Ron stuck his landing on the ground. They started cheering as Charlie stumbled out of Ron's pocket and ran over to her friends.

"Thank you, mister!" Charlie said.

Ron smiled back. "No big."

Charlie's friends all said a word of thanks before they all few off together, fleeing the crime scene.

When Ron turned to track down Rufus, he caught Spud waving some striped sticks around. He said something in a flamboyant voice that Ron couldn't make out from where he stood, and suddenly the sticks sparked to life. Next, his longboard on the ground started to tilt and lean by itself, rocking the pixie children back and forth as they play-fought with twig-swords.

Ron moved closer and took a seat on the other side of Spud's longboard, making sure not to sit on anyone. Getting a closer look, he noticed little spider-like shapes on the end of Spud's sticks. They looked rather used - one was missing several legs - but that was made up for in the tiny mustache and top hat crazy-glued to them. "So are you some kind of wizard or something?" Ron asked.

"Nah, these are just a hobby." Spud waved one wand around and said something in Latin. The longboard lifted off the ground and started swaying like a ship on rough waters. The kids gave delighted screeches. "They weren't even mine, really. I nabbed these off this dark wizard in eighth grade."

"You were fighting dark wizards in eight grade?"

"Well, mostly Jake was fighting dark wizards," Spud admitted. "But this one was trying to use me for my exceptional noggin," Spud slapped a wand to his head, a spark almost catching his hat on fire, "and I wasn't gonna take that sitting down. You and Kim started as preteens, too, right?"

"Well, yeah, but we didn't really get into any of the big stuff till high school. Somehow. Honestly I don't know how we did all of that and high school at the same time. By all accounts, it doesn't really make sense. Now Kim's got college out of the country, though, and it eats up even more of her time. It's been a big reason for Team Possible going on extended break. Well, that, and... another reason. But that reason's kinda sorta 'government classified'," Ron made sure to use air quotes, "so we don't really talk about it."

They were both silent for a long moment, watching the Pixies play out their game.

"What about you?" Spud said suddenly.

Ron looked up. "What?"

"How do you have time to be here if you're going to some crazy Japanese University on the other side of the planet? You must have a fantastic number of travel miles, huh? Bet you could use 'em for some Maui vacation, right?"

Ron felt a familiar rock in his chest at the mention of school. "Haha." Ron found himself looked up at the trees. "Yeah, man." He rubbed a finger under his suddenly itchy nose. "Could fly out on some great Italian cruise or something."

Spud gave Ron this knowing smirk that Hirotaka gave him whenever Ron was about to lose that crazy Japanese version of chess that the Master kept trying to get him to play. "You're totally a drop out, aren't you?"

"What?" Ron almost fell backwards. "Haha, no, I don't - why would I drop out of college? Hehhee-" Ron winced as his voice cracked. He swallowed hard before speaking again. "Why would you think that?"

"I know that look intimately, dude," Spud confessed, sighing. "The 'How am I Supposed to Tell My Best Gal-Pal that the world of higher education just isn't for me?" Spud gesticulated by thrusting one of the wands to his chest, causing it to spark and his shirt to singe. "Ouch!"

"You're not gonna go to college?"

"Nah, I mean," Spud carefully lowered his longboard back to the ground as he spoke. "I love the whole learning part and it's not like it's all that hard. I just don't think there's anything really in it for me."

Everything Ron remembered Mr. Barkins had told him his senior in school was screaming in protest. "Don't you want to get a job, a future, go places?"

"Don't you?" Spud asked. Ron couldn't meet his eyes. "There's more than one path through life, I figure. Maybe Jake could hook me up with some human-magical creature ambassador job, like he did for Rose-" Spud winced like he'd been slapped. "Oops."

Ron was about 88% sure he had an approximate answer to the question already, but he asked anyway. "Who's Rose?"

Spud sighed the tension out of his shoulders. "Jake's ex-girlfriend. We're, ah, not supposed to talk about her. Especially around Jake. Dude's a total sap when it comes to romance. Poor guy could probably barely glance by flower shops now-a-days without tearing up a little. We try really hard not to bring her up around Jake lest we turn the tides of times slow but steady healing." Spud accentuated his point by pushing his board back and forth - with his hands this time - in a steady rhythm and making swoosh, shwoosh noises. The young pixies squeaked with excitement, trying to stay on their feet.

"What about you?" Ron couldn't help but ask. "Are you and Trixie...?"

"Oh, no way, man." Spud made a frantic gesticulation with his hands that Ron couldn't quite interpret. "We got that outta the way as quickly as possible. Girl's like a sister to me. Besides, I've got another lovely lady and she's got her own hunk of man."

"Do they know about any of this?" Ron made a wide gesture to the magical flying pixie creatures around them.

"Nope." Spud's gaze became wistful as he scooped up the leaf a pixie was sitting on, waving a wand around again, and levitated it around. She giggled in delight. "Buts it's just teen romance. It's not like we're engaged or anything. Stacy will follow up and that cheerleading scholarship and I'll do...something. We'll get over it."

Ron sighed. "I don't think I'll ever get over Kim."

"Then you'd better work hard, brother," Spud suggested wisely. "And remember: honesty is the best policy. Especially if one of you has supernatural powers and responsibilities."

Ron was stunned out of speech for a second, his mouth hanging half open. Their conversation had glazed over Ron's not telling Kim about his dropping out of college, but 'supernatural powers'? Ron was about to ask how Spud could possibly know so much when the Kimmunicator on his wrist started beeping furiously. An unknown number flashed across the screen and Ron answered. "Hello?"

"Ron!"

"Trixie? What's wrong?"

"Some tripped-up lady's crashing the diplomat's tent!" There was a crash and a high pitched screaming in the background. "Haley's trying to hold her off while I get everyone out, but this chick is throwing green fire and I have my hands full just trying to get the pixies to safety. Tell Spud to start evacuating rest of the convention, just to be safe, but Haley could use a fighting hand or two down here!" There was another crash. "Maybe some fighting feet if you've got a few!"

Green fire? That didn't sound good. "On my way! Spud," he said next. He made this decision quickly, unsure that he could guarantee his own safety against Shego, much less the safety of both of them. "Can you keep an eye on Rufus?"

Rufus started jabbering in diligent opposition, but Spud scooped him right up and dropped him in his own pants pocket. "No problem, man. Good luck." Spud flipped the board into his hands and started herding the kids. "Alright, kids! Time for a field trip with Professor Spud! Who wants to see a real life, human, hot dog stand!"

When Ron finally managed to weave through the fleeing crowd and get to the diplomats tent, there wasn't much of a tent left. The support beams had been knocked over or broken, leaving the roof to be trampled, stomped on, and torched by the figure standing in the middle, holding something in their hand that Ron couldn't see. As Ron approached they slipped it into a pocket in their pants. Ron finally saw them from the front when they turned to face the sky.

The last person Rom expected to see was Shego. Well, maybe not the last. The green fire should have been a dead giveaway, frankly. But anyway, there she was, standing in the middle of the chaos, remnants of the tent charred and strewn around her as she fired off shots like bullets from her hands. Before the shots could hit the fleeing pixies, though, balls of red-hot fire intercepted them. The fire balls were coming from...a flying pink lizard? The sun was reflecting off of it and blinding Ron as he tried to look up. The sun was blocked out when the lizard's wings made an upstroke and he could make out its shape. It looked for all things like a...dragon? Oh, right, dragon! Ron had yet to actually see Jake or his sister transform.

"Haley!" Ron called, gaining both her and Shego's attention. He faced Shego head-on and stabilized his stance. "I got this, get them out of here," he told Haley.

Haley nodded, called, "Be careful!" and flew off after the pixies.

Shego turned to face Ron with all her usual swagger and unnecessary hip swaying.

"What, no snarky comment about sidekicks today?" Ron said.

Shego gave no more response than lowering herself into a fighting stance and lunging towards him.

Ron swallowed. "I guess not."

Shego came at him in a rush.

Now Ron might have improved quite a bit in his fighting skills, living with ninjas will do that to a guy, but apparently so had Shego. She matched him hit for hit, step for step. When Ron swung his leg around for a kick, she caught in ankle and twisted him in the air. Muscle memory from endless practice at the dojo landed Ron on all fours, but he had to somersault forward to dodge a fiery punch to the back. From then on Ron was avoiding every hit instead of blocking, and barely swinging out of the way fast enough to avoid his clothes getting singed. She was moving almost as fast as Ron's sensei back in Japan. He had plenty of practice dodging at that speed, but he was hardly able to hit back yet. He never thought he'd actually have to outside the dojo, he didn't think it would be possible for anyone else to move so quickly. But Shego was throwing punches and kicks like she was immune to wind-resistance.

It felt like forever before he found his opening. He wouldn't have even been looking towards it if he hadn't been desperate. Leaving her shoulders open after the punch was such a novice mistake that Ron would have laughed if someone told him he would see Shego make it. But, sure enough, he managed throw his hands forward, knock her to the dirt, and hold her down with both hands on her wrists and a knee across her collar bone.

As he held her, he couldn't help himself from asking, "Why are you still here? Why haven't you vanished into thin air yet? Is your magic teleporter broken or-oof!"

Ron was cut off by a strong kick to the gut that sent him flying across the grass. He could only roll over in the dirt, winded and seeing stars, while Shego stood over him. He knew he didn't have the breath or the balance to doge and was preparing for the hit when suddenly the wind picked up and his vision went red. As Ron finished gasping air into his lungs, he was able to recognize the red as a huge wall of scales that had landed on top of Shego.

It was another dragon. This one must have been twenty feet long with an even larger wingspan. It had Shego's arms trapped under it's very pointy claws and teeth parted in what looked like an incredibly well-filed grin. If that wasn't surprising enough, it blew steam in Shego's face and said. "Gotcha!"

Then there were hands pulling Ron up from behind and a voice he'd recognize anywhere - Kim's voice - asking, "Are you alright Ron?"

"I-" Ron would later deny that he'd stopped to cough for a moment, still trying to remember how exactly oxygen was supposed to fit down his throat. When called on it, he remind them that Shego's footwear of choice was a platform heel. "I'm fine! I mean, I might have a spectacular bruise in the shape of a foot, but, y'know, other than that."

Ron was happy to get a smile out of Kim, who turned to the dragon. "Don't crush her, Jake," she said. "We still have to question her."

Ron swung his head towards the dragon. "Jake?"

"In the scales!" Jake confirmed. He flapped his wings a few times. "Ya dig?"

"I do," Ron agreed, "I do dig."

"Ron! Jake!"

At Kim's call, Ron and Jake's attention went back to where Shego lay trapped under-not under Jake's massive claws. Where Shego once was, now there were only wisps of reddish smoke.

Jake lifted his paw (hand?) from the ground. "What the...?" There was nothing but empty grass.

"Well that's new," Kim said.

Jake swung his massive head around. "Where'd she go?"

"Gone," Kim said, pulling a stray lock of hair back into place. "Again. If only we'd made it here sooner."

"Timing was perfect, if you ask me," Ron reassured her with a thump on the shoulder. "I appreciate that I still have my face."

Ron was nearly blinded by the sudden fireball that erupted next to him and he most definitely did not shriek in surprise. He was a little stunned, however, when a human Jake dropped out and said, "I still bet I would have flown us here faster than the plane," as if it was perfectly normal.

"Maybe next time," Kim said, and she walked away to inspect the remains of the tent where the pixie's leaders had been gathered. Jake and Ron followed behind.

The grounds were eerily quiet now. Haley, Trixie and Spud must have gotten everyone out and to a safer place. He told as much to Jake, who said, "They probably moved further up the park. We should make sure she's really gone before going to tell them it's safe."

Kim kicked dirt over a lick of green fire that was still burning. She that look on her face that said she was thinking. She turned that look to Ron. "Shego did all of this?"

"Yeah," he shrugged. "I mean, it was definitely Shego, but something about her seemed really...un-Shego. Does that make sense?"

"Not really." She took a break from her brooding-face to give him a sweet smile. "But it's not often that you do."

Ron felt his cheeks go a little pink and he smiled back.

Jake barked a laugh next to him. "Well aren't you guys adorable."

Kim took this in stride but Ron found himself all pink in the face again.

"So this Shego lady is definitely connected to the magical community somehow, if she showed up here," Jake said. "I've got school tomorrow, but afterwards I can go ask around again. Check out some of the shadier corners that might know something the people of the Magas Bazaar streets wouldn't."

"What should we do?" Ron asked.

Kim answered, "I'm going to do my homework. At this point, there isn't really anything we can do but leave it to you, Jake."

"You can count on me," Jake boasted.

"Why don't we have a study date tomorrow, Ron? We can pick out a nice space in the Park tonight and sit around there tomorrow. You must have a ton of work to do, too."

"I, uh, of course!" Ron had to put a huge mental effort into not scratching his nose. It wasn't a lie! The Master always gave him all sorts of bookish work in an attempt to improve his Japanese and teach him all the complicated points to history and culture that he insisted were "vital to your complete training."

Ron was saved by Jake giving him a hard clap on the back. "Thanks for all your help today, Ron. We really owe you one."

"Don't mention it," Ron said and jumped at the chance to change the topic. "Let's get some of this cleaned up, shall we?"

(Edited 3/2/2015)

-Kinetic