Review offering insight to the story:
"if i've said it once about this story count on it that i will say it a million times ... this is currently topping my favorite way to waste time and avoid doing my uni assignments by re-reading this story time after time ... i love this story ... pure genius ... i have read every time travel story i can get my hands on because i studied physics for a while and time travel was connected to the only part i understood ... any way if in life you ever feel you aren't making a difference just stop a while and remember how many people like me get through their day by reading and re-reading this story ... it is magnificent and wonderful and as close to perfect as humanly possible if not closer... i eagerly await the next chapter with baited breath and can only dream of how marvelous it shall surely be ... congratulaions on a story well done ... Ciao Darling" - DramaQueen4eva of FanFiction net.
Thank you to the following reviewers: nelygirl, Hotkat144, Jester08, Samdoria, Celtic-Dragon-89, brokenblackangel, Gise Cald, Galleon-to-Galleon, Mrs. R. Lupin, bethygirl94, Black-Rose23, amrawo, Cameron MD, Sassafras123, Andressa, FallFromGrace1191, mushcorn, Danielle, Lupin's Mistress, DeltaGamma Liv, Li Chan, DramaQueen4eva and especially pstibbons, laugh.live.learn (Rachel) and galloping-goose (Zeus)
The Werewolf Tamer
Nine
Remus found himself standing just outside the property of the Shrieking Shack, night descending on him and the people around him rapidly. Sirius, James, and Peter were standing off to the side, the two more outgoing Marauders talking amicably while the other laughed and listened to whatever it was they spoke of. Remus had never noticed how often Peter appeared to be looking in from the outside, rather than joining in with the group. Hermione stood on a large boulder, away from the others, her hands clasped behind her back and her boot laden feet braced apart. She was dressed head to toe in black and Remus found himself thinking she looked like a widow in mourning, which she was, but in the past it hadn't been nearly as obvious. Ever since she admitted to them about the murder of her husband, he found himself seeing her more clearly. Her emotions were far more stark, her eyes more void, her body language heavier with remorse. Still though, even with her pain, she had a commanding appearance as she stood high up on the shadowed rock, her open robes caught in a dance with the wind.
Brighton paced frantically in front of her, though her gaze was set firmly on the skies. The boy, who couldn't be much older than Remus, was wringing his hands, his shoulders hunched forward, and his eyes wandering over the ground, as if looking for answers to all of his questions. Remus found himself mildly proud that he didn't look as scared as the other boy. Everything was riding on this night, every hope for his future, every chance at being accepted, his entire world. What if it didn't work? What if the potion he'd ingested earlier had no effect? What if when he turned, Hermione wasn't able to talk to him and he lashed out and attacked her instead? There were so many "What if's?" that he found himself wondering if he was doing the right thing anymore.
"Not much longer now," Hermione called out. Her voice sounded distant though, as if she were deep in thought and could barely be bothered to inform them. She was a very intelligent woman, Remus had found out quickly. Often, he'd find her with a thoughtful expression, and then she'd tell him about the most interesting thing. It was a habit of hers, one he found quite endearing. She'd spout off random facts or tell him all about something she'd read recently that truly caught her attention. Sirius liked to say she was a talking encyclopedia, but Remus found her enchanting. He knew he shouldn't, just like he knew he didn't have a chance at ever becoming more with her. She may very well have fallen for a werewolf, married him even, but there was no way she'd ever take up with him. Not only because he was her student, and younger than her by five years, but because she was simply far too good for him.
He never imagined there were really people like her out there. Those who would fight for a cause, one that had nothing to do with them at all, and never allow anything to pull them away from it. Someone who thought more of others than themselves in nearly every situation, it was so uncommon. And then there was her intelligence, which seemed to outweigh all four Marauders together, he had to admit, unfortunately. She also seemed to know every secret that the four boys possessed, along with each and every crevice of Hogwarts. She could outsmart them without lifting her head to see just what it was they were doing, and make them feel like smitten little boys moments later by smiling at them for their attempt. It was true, though they knew her a short time, the Marauders had taken a real shining to Professor Granger.
Sirius still had his moments, where he'd look at her and get a suspicious expression. He'd often comment that she seemed to know something, or was up to something that was far bigger than they could imagine. Remus found him looking at her often, though it wasn't in a way that Sirius usually looked at women. He didn't appear to see her as someone he could flirt with or enjoy a could snog with in the broom closets late at night. That could be because she was a professor, though Remus was sure it wasn't really the reason. He looked at her like she was a puzzle, one that he simply had to figure out. Still though, he treated her like a friend, a confidant, and a trustworthy adversary in the world of pranking. He would pull the tricks, and she would outwit the prankster. They had an interesting friendship to say the least; one that seemed light hearted and fun. There were moments though, when Remus would see her looking at him, and he saw a recognition there that went far past just weeks. It was nowhere near what he'd call romantic, but it was trusting and reminiscent. Remus wondered sometimes just why she looked like she knew them all so much better than she should.
It seemed a favorite pastime of the two newly found friends was to debate. At first, Remus thought they were simply fighting. They didn't agree on numerous fronts and it eventually began a sparring of words between the two. After a few of their 'spats,' he began to realize that it wasn't so much a fight as a debate. They enjoyed butting heads, found gratification in proving their point to one another and trying to make the other bow to their way of thinking. More often neither really won, as they were far too stubborn to admit defeat. It was fun to watch though and Remus found himself remembering their most recent one thoughtfully.
"They're slaves!" Hermione exclaimed, shaking her head and throwing Sirius a dubious glare.
Remus sat back, watching from his position on top of one of the desks, sitting adjacent to James who was half-grinning and evaluating where to move his chess piece as he stared down at the board, paying only a half-mind to the debate happening in the background. Remus glanced briefly at Peter, who was sitting in the chair beside the desk, his head level with the board as he propped it on his arms crossed over the desktop. Hermione and Sirius were standing in the front of the classroom, their DADA teacher glowering with her arms crossed angrily over her chest. Sirius kept swiping his hand through his hair, leaning back slightly on one leg as he was prone to do when trying to appear much more at ease than he was.
"Any time, James," Remus teased him absently, knowing that his friend took forever to make a move. His eyes looked sideways at Sirius and Hermione as they faced off, finding them a little more interesting than the game in front of him.
"They want to be enslaved," Sirius replied to her in a hard tone. He stared at her a moment, before shaking his head. "They don't know any other way!"
"Then shouldn't we teach them? Give them the opportunity to have another way. To live without orders and beatings and a mediocre disposition in the world?" she asked him, her voice raising with her disgruntlement at the injustice. "They aren't mindless creatures, Sirius! They speak, they think, they talk, just like us!"
He sighed, the sound loud and frustrated. "But this is their way of life now. Yes, they're oppressed! Yes, they're enslaved! And yes, they are considered as replaceable! But that's what they've grown adjusted to. You can't just show them the world and tell them to make of it what they would. They believe that their purpose is to serve others. If you tried to free them, it would have severe backlash on you. They don't want to be free, they want to live with a nice family. They want to serve people who need them. They need to be needed!" he tried.
"Well why can't it be a job? Why can't we pay them or give them holidays or treat them like we would any human we were employing?" she asked him, her hands lifting to rest on her hips.
"Because they're not human, 'Mione!" he replied, shaking his head and throwing his arms up. "Look! I understand that you're upset over what you think is them being trapped, but you have to view it from their position. They've been enslaved for so long that there is almost no recollection of them ever being free. They're loyal to the families they serve, so much so that they would willingly kill themselves if they were to wrong them. So by trying to tell them that they're free, you're really insulting them. They would think themselves a failure and most likely destroy themselves over it. They don't want to be free! I don't know how many ways I can describe it!" he growled, running his hand through his hair.
Remus glanced down at the chess board, finding James' move and half-smiling as he saw his best friend's satisfied grin. Easily, Remus moved his own piece to block his friend's and stifled a laugh as James suddenly became very thoughtful and his brow furrowed as he tried to think of a way to best Remus. Turning his attention back to Sirius and Hermione, he wondered how it would all end. Who would give up first? It usually ended with one of them making a noise of disgruntled forfeit and stating that the whole conversation was "pointless" before they stalked off or moved to talk to the rest of the boys.
"Ah ha!" James exclaimed and Remus looked back to the board. "Oh... huh... never mind," he mumbled, going back to his deep thinking before he moved. Remus chuckled, wondering where Lily was that afternoon. Not that it would have helped James' chess skills any. He'd probably be too smitten and distracted by Lily to pay any attention to the board. Unfortunately for James, he wasn't much of a chess player. Exploding Snap, he was champion! Quidditch, one of the best! But chess, he was only semi-good. He could beat Peter without problem. Sometimes he managed to outplay Sirius, on the occasion that Padfoot wasn't really paying attention. But whenever he tried his luck with Remus, he usually failed miserably. Still though, he gave it his best every time and vowed to one day win a match.
"So that's it then? From now on we should just accept the stipulations and boundaries placed on everything? How would you feel if tomorrow they told you you weren't allowed to do anything at all without consent? What if you were told your wand was being confiscated and magic could only be used if you asked, and even then it was limited? What if you weren't allowed any of the small delights given to you so easily? Like enjoying a lazy day with your friends or visiting a shop in Hogsmeade? What if every little thing was monitored so that you never stepped out of line? And if you did you were forced to harm yourself for your mistake? How would you feel Sirius? Wouldn't you want that to end? Wouldn't you be glad for a day when everything wasn't so dismal and strict?" She stared at him, her eyes searching and intense. "You love to break rules, Sirius, so how would you feel if you were forced to follow every one of them?" she asked, passionately.
"There... yes...okay," James murmured near Remus, having finally decided his move.
Sirius stared at her a long moment, his head tipped to the side. He looked... shocked. Remus wondered if this would be the one time that Hermione would finally stump him. He grinned, cocky and stubborn. "You know me, Mione, I'd find a way around the rules, no matter how strict."
Hermione sighed, rolling her eyes and throwing her arms up in the air in exasperation.
Remus turned back to the board, amused and shaking his head. Exhaling lightly, he reached out and moved his piece with hardly any thought to it. "Checkmate, James," he said, smiling.
"Drat!" James said, frowning. "Let's go again, Mooney! I'll win one yet!"
Hermione and Sirius came over to watch the show and Remus wasn't surprised to hear her make the odd noise when James tried to move a piece that would likely prove trouble later. Remus thought that if James ever did win, it'd likely be because of Hermione's disproving or approving sounds pointing him in the right direction. Shaking his head, he settled in for a sure-to-be-enjoyable game.
James and Hermione's friendship was another story altogether, they sometimes acted like they had grown up together. Lily had commented once that Hermione seemed to treat James like a little brother. It wasn't until that moment that Remus noticed it was true. She chastised James over things and every once in awhile got an expression like she was going to tell on him, in some childish manner. She acted rather hen-like with him, taking on a motherly tone and telling him not to do things so he wouldn't get hurt. The one time she attended a Quidditch practice, she sat with her hands clasped tightly and an expression of abject horror as the Quaffle continued to come flying at him to catch and throw. She also seemed to hate flying, or at least feared it. So whenever James did an obviously tricky move, she'd gasp and squirm. At one point, he had a Quaffle scrape his cheek, and she went completely nuts on him, shouting about how he really had to be more careful and if his mother could see him, she'd likely be incredibly worried. She paced and muttered, wringing her hands, and shaking her head at him, while he continued to half-smile at her and toss his snitch up in the air to catch a moment later.
"James, do be careful up there, if you fall, you're sure to break your neck!" Hermione called out to him as he tried to stand high on the banister of her stairs to the classroom. He'd been trying all afternoon to run down it without tripping sans victory yet. Currently he was balanced on one foot at the very top, tossing his Snitch up into the air and trying to catch it without teetering over.
"I'm sure you'll catch me if I fall," he replied, shrugging, his eyes centered solely on the gold that flew up in the air and then fell, his hand darting out to grab it.
"Perhaps this one time I won't, that'll teach you, won't it?" she replied primly, lifting her chin a notch and staring at him out of the corner of her eye, her hands on her hips. Remus watched from his place at one of the desks, his homework sitting in front of him, half done. These were the moments where they all forgot Hermione was their Professor and considered her simply their friend.
James laughed, amusement and disbelief strong in the merry sound. "You'd catch me!" he said in a sing-song voice.
"Nope!" she said, sounding defiant. "I'd let you fall, then I'd take you to Poppy, and then I'd spend my whole morning reminding you why it's not safe to do what you're doing right this minute!" she told him, shaking her head and pursing her lips.
James hopped and landed on the other foot while Remus smiled lightly at the indrawn breath of fear that Hermione had just taken. Remus rather wished Sirius was around, if only because he would have enjoyed seeing Hermione so worried and chastising toward James. He wondered where Peter was off to, as he couldn't be with Sirius. Padfoot was currently snogging Melinda Ozark in the broom closet a floor up, at least that's what he was planning to do and he usually got his way when it involved a girl.
James glanced down at Hermione, smirking with smug satisfaction. "See! You'll catch me," he said assuredly.
Hermione made a disgruntled noise and began muttering under her breath about pesky boys and their tendency to do stupid and moronic things that would result in bodily harm or imminent death. "What would your mother say if she knew you were doing that?" she called out, frowning. "I bet she'd be right upset with you," she told him, sounding like a pesky sister who would tell on him if he didn't do what she wanted.
James lifted his brow before shrugging his shoulders. "What are you going to do then? Write home to my mum? The owl won't reach her before I slip," he told her, tauntingly.
She huffed, rolling her eyes. "Honestly James!"
"Honestly Hermione," he replied cheekily, "Just admit you'd catch me if I fell."
"No," she replied defiantly, clearing her face and trying to look unperturbed.
He chuckled, "Fine. But it'll be your problem when they find me sprawled across your floor. And they'll ask you, 'Why Professor Granger? Why in all that's good in the world didn't you save poor, innocent James from sure death? Certainly you thought to use your wand, or even your arms? Have you no heart?'" he said in a high-pitched, dramatic voice.
She snorted, shaking her head at him emphatically. "Innocent, James? Please!"
"Well..." he said, grinning as he shrugged agreeably. He couldn't be considered innocent, no. He was a Marauder after all, so how innocent could he really be? He tossed the Snitch back up in the air and glanced quickly at the door as Sirius came striding through, a wide grin on his face. His attention was taken for a moment too long however, as he turned back and reached for the Snitch far too abruptly. His footing came out from under him and he slipped sideways on the banister, tripping to fall off and quickly toward the hard, cement ground.
It happened so fast Remus only had time to suck in a shocked breath and lift his brows in surprise. Sirius stopped mid-step and his arm swung out as if he thought to catch James, though he was too far away to do anything but watch. Hermione on the other hand had her wand out before anybody could blink and said a quick spell to slow his fall and return him to his feet. It seemed James was so shocked by his slip that he hadn't even thought to shout. Standing steadily on his feet, he looked around in mild surprise before turning to Hermione with a 'told-you-so' smirk, which was quickly hidden as she came full force in hysteria. She poked his chest and waved her hand around as she began babbling about 'idiots who never listen,' 'dangerous acts that will one day cost his life,' and 'the stupidity of every boy she'd ever known'.
James took it all in stride, tossing his Snitch up in the air and catching it while he grinned good-naturedly at Hermione. Sirius, seeing that everything was back to normal, let out a grateful sigh and then sat down at the desk beside Remus, smirking at him in a manner that said he was about to tell him a great tale that involved a pretty girl and a fantastic snog. Remus just sat back, calmed by the fact that Hermione would surely be there to catch them before any of them ever fell. She'd save them no matter what the situation, of that he was sure.
Remus found it interesting how quickly James had come to trust the woman he said appeared out of thin air. James never questioned her being there, which was odd for him. He should have been more curious, more suspicious of her, like Sirius was, but almost from the beginning, he seemed to find peace with her presence. Remus understood it in some way, because he too felt it, but James didn't seem to have a reason. Remus contributed his own peace to that of being tamed by her and given the opportunity to be free. But James hadn't really been given anything, or at least that was what Remus thought. He wondered now, however, if Hermione hadn't just given him a sister. James was an only child, though he treated the other three Marauders like his brothers. Now though, he looked at Hermione as if she was the older sister he never had growing up. Remus noticed that when he wanted a girls opinion, he went to her. When he wanted advice, he went to her. When he was upset about his father's recent death and his mother's failing health , he would seek her out for compassion. It wasn't that he thought any less of Sirius or Remus, because he still talked to them about most things, too. But, there was a small bond between him and Hermione, one where they seemed to rely on each other to be a familial connection.
Peter, on the other hand, was likely the most disconnected from Hermione. He came along with the other Marauders whenever they went to visit her in her classroom, where she was usually to be found. He would squeak out replies to her questions and every once in awhile add a few thoughts of his own, but he never quite allowed himself to really get to know Hermione. Remus thought it might be just how intense she was that scared Peter. She had a natural and almost wild beauty to her and a fierce personality that commanded loyalty and strength. To hold a conversation with her, it was expected that the participant be intelligent themselves and able to coherently understand what she was talking about or thinking. Subjects she discussed passionately almost always had connections to freedom. The upcoming war with Voldemort, rights for werewolves and house elves, and simply anyone else that she felt shouldn't be bound by 'silly laws that were obviously made by bigoted arseholes,' in her own words. Peter wasn't one for confrontation, or studying really, so he simply wasn't someone able to hold their own with Hermione. Sirius, James, Lily and Remus, however, seemed to be four of her favorite people.
"You've finished your homework, haven't you Peter?" Hermione asked, her gaze glancing at him. Her tone was only mildly curious, as if it suddenly dawned on her that she should ask him, too. She'd already sat down with James, Remus, and Sirius and discussed their classes with them and what they were working on. Remus enjoyed these days, when she would take on the position of professor and tell them a little more on the subject they were looking over. Her tone became more fascinated and knowing while she told them all about a moment in history so fluently it was as if she had been there. Or elaborated on a subject so much that he would've thought she was the natural professor of it. He knew it was because she read books on nearly everything and so she had a great knowledge for everything being taught, even her hated Divination. While Sirius liked to bug her about being far too much of a bookworm, Remus knew he was just as awed by her intelligence some days as the rest of them.
"Yes," Peter mumbled, nodding quickly before he turned his attention back to the Quidditch magazine he was holding.
Hermione jerked her head to acknowledge that she'd heard him but then pursed her lips. "Good, because you know Professor Socors said that you haven't been doing so well in his class lately." She shook her head, clasping her hands together. "Arithmancy takes a great deal of time and effort, Peter, are you sure you don't need a little help? You must be quite busy lately, with the amount of classes you're taking," she tried to say gently.
He sighed, frowning, "It was one or two assignments, that's all," he murmured, looking agitated and trying to squirm to hide behind his magazine.
"Yes, but it's only been a couple weeks since term started," she reminded him, looking a little annoyed herself. "Socors won't be going to Dumbledore just yet, but a meeting with him is no doubt on the horizon." She shook her head, her brow furrowing.
"Oh, but I won't get into any trouble right?" he asked, suddenly becoming very worried. "It's only an assignment or two, Professor Granger, couldn't you talk to him for me? Please?" he pleaded, his eyes becoming even more watery than usual. Remus found it rather odd that Peter still continued to call her Professor at every turn, instead of using the name that the other three Marauders used. He also almost never asked for help from Hermione. He looked pitiful though, practically begging.
"I remember those assignments," Sirius interrupted, apparently not waiting for Hermione to cave and agree to talk to Socors for him. He frowned at Peter, "We were all working on them in the library, we asked if you needed our input, you said you were practically done already." He shook his head, "What's the problem? I thought you were doing well in Arithmancy," he sounded almost accusing, like he was annoyed that they had to clean up his mess. Remus wondered why, seeing as he usually just did what had to be done when it concerned a fellow Marauder and never asked questions.
Peter too looked surprised by his intervention and scowled at Hermione, but it was gone so quickly Remus wasn't even sure it had really happened. "I didn't want to bother you. You guys were all doing so well and I was stuck in the beginning. I thought I could just hand it in later and it would be fine. But then he handed out another assignment so quickly that I got bogged down." He sighed, his shoulders slumping and his face twisting with a lack of self confidence Remus was used to seeing on his friends face.
Hermione was staring at him, her eyes narrowed and a suspicious look on her face. Sirius and James couldn't see it, but Remus had a clear view, and he wondered why it was that she always seemed to direct that exact face at Peter, but never the others. Her face cleared after a moment and she let out a quiet sigh. "You shouldn't feel that way, Peter." She stepped forward and Remus wasn't surprised when Wormtail shrunk a little in his seat, he was always rather uncomfortable around Hermione. "They're your friends. If you can't rely on anyone else, you should always be able to rely on your best friends." She stared at him, hard. "If they were ever in trouble, you would do all you could to help them, wouldn't you Peter?" she asked, and Remus wondered why her words seemed to have a sharp edge to them.
"O-of c-course, Professor," he stuttered out, his eyes darting over to the other Marauders and grinning with idolization before he looked back at Hermione.
Hermione didn't seem to believe his words entirely, but she smiled all the same. "Good. Then you'll remember to accept their help when you're having troubles in your classes, won't you?" she asked him, pointedly. He nodded wordlessly, his head jerking quickly. She smiled back and said, "Well, why don't you get your books then? If you hand in the assignments by tomorrow, I'll make sure Socors doesn't take it to Dumbledore. From now on though, Peter, I don't want to hear from the other Professors that you haven't been completing your work. You know there are people willing to help you along." Her shoulders were rather tight with her next words, but her voice was gentle and coaxing, "If you ever have need for me, I'm here to help."
Peter stared at her for a moment, his eyes rather questioning. But he nodded, "Yes, thank you."
Hermione smiled wanly and then turned to the others, "James, stop playing with your hair, will you? Lily won't be here today and you have nobody here to impress." She sighed, sounding amused. "I could always get you a mirror if you're really so self-centered."
"I'm the least self-centered boy in this room," he replied, grinning.
She snorted, rolling her eyes. "Oh, and here I thought that was Sirius," she replied sarcastically.
It wasn't just the Marauders that held her in high regard though, Remus noticed that most others in the school had a respect for their professor, finding her intriguing and refreshing from most others. She was younger and more understanding of the little things. She didn't allow talking while she was speaking, or note passing, but she could enjoy the rare joke from Sirius or James, and allowed them to speak their mind, if only to gauge how they all looked at things. She loved to hear their opinions on various spells and creatures, wanting to learn just how the minds of their age seemed to work. Outside of classes, she was never lax on the rules, but she did allow for small indiscretions. She let them keep their Map and Invisibility cloak when she found them on their way to the Kitchens again, and he'd heard about how she allowed a couple third year boys off with a warning when she found them out of bed past hours, searching for where they had hidden a large stash of sweets so they wouldn't get confiscated by Filch. She handed out detentions where needed though and was never seen as a pushover in or outside of the DADA classroom.
She also didn't appear to realize her own beauty, because she hadn't caught on to the way most of the seventh and sixth year boys all blushed in her presence or, on rare occasions, tried their hands at flirting. It was a fact that she had yet to realize Gilderoy Lockhart, a sixth year boy who was widely seen as devilishly handsome with his wavy blonde hair and overly charming grin, had quite the infatuation with her. He went out of his way to stop by her classroom and beam his extremely white grin at her whenever possible. It was common knowledge that most of the girls harbored a crush for the so-called handsome sixth year, and yet Hermione looked at him as if he were something she'd recently scraped off the bottom of her boot. Remus had to smother his laugh whenever he saw her wrinkle her nose at the boy in distaste and roll her eyes whenever he tried to be charming with her. She treated him like a little boy asking for another cookie, always sighing in exasperation and never letting him have the cookie. Remus loved every minute of it.
"Stop your pacing, Brighton, everything will be fine," Hermione called out, suddenly hopping down from the boulder. Her boots made a clomping noise, but she landed with perfect grace and reached out to pat Brighton's shoulder. Remus felt his stomach twist and a gnawing jealousy woke up inside his chest, wanting to claw its way out and tear up Brighton. He blamed it on the wolf, but he couldn't deny his own natural infatuation with the woman. It wasn't all that surprising when Brighton simply nodded and stilled his feet from their nervous movements.
Hermione's eyes thinned and she turned to the three Marauders, "Change, please," she told them, politely but not without a small demand in her words.
Wordlessly, James and Sirius followed orders and used their animagi abilities to become a brilliant stag and a Grim-like black dog. Peter shifted on his feet a little before following suit and becoming a small, drab little grey rat. He looked almost obsolete standing between two large animals that held power and strength in their every movement
Remus pulled his eyes away from his friends when he realized Hermione was coming over to him. He felt a tingle on his skin and the chill of the air, knowing that he was about to go through the painful transformation soon. She stopped in front of him and his heartbeat sped up, expecting to see some sense of fear in her chocolate eyes. His expression became slightly puzzled when he found her looking at him without any fear, despite knowing what he was going to become. Some days it was still rather hard to believe that she could look at him and see 'just Remus,' rather than the monster inside. Women like her -intelligent, beautiful, strong- they shouldn't want anything to do with him. They should turn their backs, sniff in disgust, and run for the hills. But here she stood, her hands clasped loosely on her hips. "Remus?" she asked, her voice soft, intoxicating in its genuine sincerity.
He looked into her eyes, his gaze focusing after his lackluster thoughts left him. "Yeah?" he asked, clearing his throat and throwing a rather worried look up to the moon. She shouldn't stand so close. What if he hurt her? What if the potion didn't work right away and the wolf wanted a taste of her?
She smiled at him and he felt his breath catch in his throat. He hoped he didn't looked as smitten as he felt sometimes, otherwise she must think him a serious dope. "No matter what happens, I'm going to be right here with you. D'you understand?" she asked him, reaching out and wrapping her soft fingers around his wrist, her thumb brushing the pressure point. "Whatever you feel, whatever fears you have, I want you to remember that I have all the experience I could possibly need in this area. I'm not in danger, and because I've already met your wolf side, it's going to recognize me. You have nothing to fear."
He swallowed thickly, nodding jerkily. "Okay," he mumbled.
She squeezed his wrist and then backed up, and for a moment he saw that same recognition shine in her gaze. The connected look her eyes gave whenever she looked at Sirius in deep thought. But there was something else there, too. He wasn't sure what it was, he just knew that her eyes had the ability to calm him and reassure him by doing nothing but settling on him. People who knew about werewolves extensively, they usually reacted badly to the amber glow of his eyes, but she met his gaze as if it were natural. She never flinched, never frowned or sniffed in disdain of the amber reminder of the monster inside that sat in waiting.
Remus could suddenly hear the rush of his heartbeat in his head. Thump, thump. It was loud, penetrating in how thick and hard it sounded. It echoed in his ears, seemed to jump from his chest, thrummed through his limbs. Thump, thump. He felt his skin begin to tingle once more and his breathing started to pick up rapidly. His lungs were expanding with each huge gust of air he inhaled. His mouth hung open as he greedily tried to suck in air as if he were suffocating. Thump, thump. His back arched, eyes closing tightly as he felt his bones moving and adjusting. His skin felt as though it were ripping away from him, tearing and burning. Thump, thump. He gave an unnatural growl as his senses picked up dramatically. He could smell everything, hear every little sound, feel the wind against him as if it were kissing the entirety of his body. Thump, thump. His clothes tore, fur pushed itself out from beneath his stretching and pained skin. His legs became longer, corded with thick muscle, and his arms felt heavy and rushed with a strength he didn't always show, but continuously felt as a human. His hands and feet expanded to become clawed and padded for running through brush and withstanding the harsh features of the ground. Thump, THUMP. With a loud, eerie howl up to the moon, he finished his transformation. He was the wolf.
It was disconcerting at first, to feel the strength and power behind his movements, to hear the heavy panting of his breath, to know he was in his werewolf form, and yet he could still think objectively. Part of him was very much the werewolf, but he still had enough human sense not to simply run off and play in the woods or wrestle with one of his friends. Sniffing the air, he could recognize the scent of another werewolf and immediately felt a sense of territorial anger. He turned to Brighton, seeing that he was fully changed and taut with confusion and wary suspicion. Hermione stood between them while his friends were off to the side, simply watching avidly. The gentle scent of Hermione reached him and he felt a primal infatuation zing through him, telling him that the wolf very much liked her. She stared directly at him and once more he felt a strong gratitude to see that she didn't cringe, back away, or even show the smallest notice of fear. Instead, she walked directly toward him, her steps sharp and precise, her robes billowing out from her legs and making her appear dramatically confident.
She lifted her fisted hand and placed it upon her heart before pulling it down across her torso in a slicing manner. 'Protector,' whispered through his mind and he felt his muscles relax a little more. The werewolf in him wanted to touch her, wanted to smell her hair and play in the brush with her. He stepped closer and his head moved forward without his even knowing. It pressed against her flat belly, nuzzling her for a moment, before rising slowly and sniffing her adoringly. Hermione chuckled and he felt her hand behind his ear, scratching him in a way that had him panting a little harder. His back foot began thumping against the ground in happiness and the merry tune of her laughter made a sense of contentment wash over him. The human half of him told him he was being abnormally touchy and that he should pull back, but his werewolf side desperately needed to be close to her.
His nose reached her neck and nudged it before burying in her hair, where he inhaled thickly. His eyes fluttered and his hands raised a little as if to pick her up. Before his human self could tell the wolf 'no,' it had placed its clawed hands on her waist and lifted her high off the ground. She gave a small squeak of surprise but didn't lash out or scream, which he was grateful for. His hind legs stretched and his back arched as he held her up, the moon framing her in an unnatural glow from behind. Her lush, wavy hair fell down long and soft against her, slipping over his forearms and sending a shiver down his spine. She simply stared at him with a half-smile, but he tipped his head to the side at seeing her eyes shining with tears. They weren't scared, but sad. He could see the longing and depressed agony shimmering in her gaze now and was reminded of her husband. The wolf in him lashed out against the idea that she could love anyone else, that she could've been with anyone else, especially a werewolf and immediately growled at the thought.
Hermione reached out, her hand touching his face and trailing down it gently. She made a noise from the back of her throat and clicked her tongue in a manner that somehow told him to, 'settle down'. He had a feeling there was more to it, but the gist of it was that he was to try and become calm for her. The wolf listened without hesitation and Remus was surprised at its devotion to her. He heard a howl in the background and turned swiftly to see Brighton rolling around on the ground and pawing at the sky boredly. His mouth immediately snarled at the other wolf, and he had the territorial need to simply take Hermione away and never let her near Brighton again.
"Put me down, Remus," Hermione called out to him, her voice level but demanding.
The wolf didn't want to and made a whining noise that told her he wasn't interested in letting her go. He told his arms to put her down and they dropped a little but then the wolf reared its ugly head and told him not to interfere, that she was his and he wanted to keep holding her. He felt as though he were fighting against his nature and wasn't sure what to do. Hermione sighed and then made a motion with her arms, a swift and direct movement with her fist and open palm. His ears fell back as if chastised and the wolf listened this time, letting him put her down on the ground before moving to stand beside her as she turned to Brighton. The hair on his body seemed to bristle as they walked toward the other werewolf and he felt the strong desire to attack, maim, and establish himself as the alpha male.
"Brighton," Hermione called out, her voice soft but commanding.
The other werewolf turned and rolled over to leap to his feet. He turned swiftly to Hermione and looked perplexed for a moment. His head turned to one side and gazed down at her in confusion before his front leg lifted and pawed at the air, almost as if he were waving to her. She chuckled lightly and then reached out, pointing to the moon and throwing her head back to howl loudly. Remus and Brighton joined her in the loud homage, the noise piercing the air and melodically singing from the three. When they were finished, Remus didn't feel so annoyed with Brighton, but rather felt like he might be able to accept his being there, if only because Hermione did. While the human Remus had tried to act friendly to him, the wolf inside didn't see it that way. It wasn't until Hermione had officially reminded them that their was a goal between them that they should act more civilized.
She turned to them, a content smile on her face. "Now, I'm going to teach you a few of the basic commands that I want you to stow away. These will essentially mean that this person does not mean to harm you," she told them both, staring directly into their eyes. "Nod if you understand or shake your head if you're having trouble," she informed them, looking back and forth and waiting for their reply. Both of them nodded and she continued on. "Okay," she said, backing up a few paces and holding her arms up to keep them from following her as they both rose to move with her. She smiled, "If a person makes this motion," she said, repeating her early action of trailing her fist from her heart to her opposite hip, "It means that person is here to protect you. Now, very few people will know this. In fact, if you see it it means that they are family or held in the highest regard. Also, the person could be a mentor or sent by someone very close to keep you safe. If they show the smallest bit of hesitation or if they mess it up though, they could be a fake. Because anyone you teach this to will only use it with you. It's a sacred motion, one meant only for those who truly care. I will not allow it to be taught to anyone I deem unworthy," she told them, her mouth set darkly.
Remus wondered how few people knew the signs she was teaching and felt rather annoyed that he had so few people to teach them to. In fact, the only ones he'd really want to know something that was dubbed sacred were standing across from him now, so there was really no one else. For a moment, he was struck with how lonely his existence was. Hermione smiled at him then however, and he was reminded that she was trying to give him a world where he wouldn't have to be lonely. Where others would learn how to speak to him and other werewolves so that he couldn't be ostracized any longer. He sat up a little straighter and put his attention back on her words, wanting to live up to her expectations.
"This movement," Hermione said, threading her fingers together, palms apart as if she were trying to separate her hands by force, "means 'friend'. It essentially lets you know that the person in front of you means you no harm, and is someone you know. Because they're not making the 'protector' motion, you know that they are not somebody you've known your whole life, or consider to be like family. This doesn't make them any less trustworthy, it just lets you see the difference. A protector will know you better, be able to communicate with you easier. So this will also let you know why the person may not be able to understand your movements as well as some might, or may even be a little bit afraid," she explained slowly.
Remus thought of how few friends he knew that knew of his furry little problem and could only think of using the friend motion for Lily. Most others he knew were just acquaintances, and he wasn't really upset about that. He rather liked having just the Marauders at times. They were the most trustworthy of friends and he would lay his life on the line for them if it came down to it.
"An important one is the one made my strangers who simply run across you," Hermione told them, her tone serious. "I need you to remember this one very specifically," she told them, walking forward. "If someone is in the woods or you somehow stumble upon an innocent, they will make this motion, and you have to take it that they are not going to harm you." She stared at them before crossing her arms over each other and patting her shoulders quickly. "They might fall, they might scream, they may even simply try and run away, which are all reason to believe that they don't want to hurt you. Your best bet is to simply avoid them. Do not chase them down, do not go looking to make sure they make the movements. And most of all, because they are a stranger, if they look toocomfortable in your presence, it could be a trap," she warned, frowning. "These movements can be used against you, so I want you to remember to pay close attention to what they're doing and how they're acting. Remember that someone who knows you or cares about you will use the other two but a stranger will only know this one. Therefore, they have the natural inclination to be scared."
She bit her lip a moment, "Something else important to remember is this," she said after a moments thought, opening her palm and placing her fist in it before quickly throwing her fist off of it. "It means to behave. It's a small chastisement. It won't be used if you're doing anything terrible, just if you're acting up. This will most often be used by those close to you, those who trust you enough to tell you when you're doing something wrong," she assured, nodding.
Remus remembered how his ears fell back and felt the wolf inside him become rather grumpy over being told he was bad. He felt like a puppy that had recently been shouted at and let out a snort of disdain. Hermione glanced at him, looking amused. Were he a human, he might have blushed or looked away, but the wolf inside him straightened up and tried to look as if he hadn't a care in the world. His body was becoming jumpy however and he wanted to go out in play for awhile. Hermione sighed, licking her lips and watching their movements.
Brighton made a whining noise and sat down, waving his head around from the need to go running. Remus felt the same, the wolf inside him kept trying to move his limbs around and jump over to play with Hermione. He had to force it back enough so he could pay close attention to what Hermione was saying. He didn't want to mess any of it up. She had already told him that she would be practicing it with him in future. That every full moon for the first year or so she would test them to see if they remembered the motions and he was glad, because he felt that if he was constantly reminded, he wouldn't forget. The part that scared him was that she would slowly take away the Wolfsbane potion too, to be absolutely sure that the wolf also knew the motions. She was testing both human and wolf and though he was sure that the wolf in him would at least remember that she was important to him, it might not remember it with other people.
Becoming restless, Remus couldn't help but stand up and stretch his body, running a small circle before sitting back down. The wolf always wanted to move, needed to gallivant in the moon light, needed to run through the trees and chase after animals.
"James," Hermione suddenly called and turned her back on them to look at the Marauder who had been sitting idly by a tree while she conferred with the werewolves. James and Sirius were chasing each other around while Wormtail sat on a low branch and watched avidly. The stag stopped and suddenly pranced over to her, looking rather proud and glorified in his animagus form. He stopped beside Hermione and looked over at the werewolves. Brighton was scratching his side with his back leg and making an annoyed noise. He began panting after a moment and Remus barely staved off the need to roll onto his back and roll around in the dirt. He could hear distant noises and knew that various other animals were coming closer. Nothing big or dangerous from what he could tell, but the wolf wanted to go hunting.
Hermione reached out and placed a hand on the back of James' neck, her hand drawing down from between his antlers to rest just above where his back started. Remus felt a growl bubble in his throat but forced the wolf to put aside his jealousy and reminded himself that James was a friend and had no interest in Hermione. The wolf seemed only mildly sated and began scratching at the dirt beneath him, pulling up grass and rocks. Hermione led James over to stand in front of Brighton and then stared at him directly, "Brighton, I want you to sniff James carefully and remember his scent. If you're ever out here without me or if you get separated from Remus and the others, I need your wolf side to remember James so you won't attack him," she told him, motioning with her index finger for Brighton to come closer.
Brighton stared at her and then glanced at James, looking apprehensive. Finally, he bounded to his feet and came forward, looming over the stag with a frightening largeness. He pushed James head so the stag would turn, and though he made an annoyed huffing noise, he turned. Brighton leaned in and took a large whiff of him, sniffing a few times and patting his back with his large, clawed hand, trying to get a feel for him and implant him in his mind. When he was finished, he nodded at Hermione and then nudged James' side with his nose, before backing up.
"Good," Hermione said, smiling lightly. "Thank you James," she told him, reaching out and scratching around his antler. He made a noise and turned to lick her palm before walking back over to the tree and standing beneath where Peter hovered on his branch. "Peter, Sirius, will you please do the same?" she asked him, politely, turning to look at him.
Sirius rolled around on the ground awhile, barking once at her before rolling onto his stomach. He waited for Peter to hop down to sit on his back and then walked over languidly, as if he had all the time in the world. Remus knew he was just trying to annoy Hermione and wasn't surprised when Hermione sighed. "I could always neuter you and leave you back at the school for the rest of the program," Hermione suggested, half-smirking.
Sirius' ears fell back and he hurried up a bit to stand in front of Brighton, who followed the same motions with James by sniffing all around him and feeling his fur. After a moment, he nodded again and the nudged Sirius to let him know he could move. Peter hopped off and scurried over to James as soon as he could, obviously still quite frightened of the unfamiliar werewolf. Instead of walking over to the tree, Sirius walked over to Hermione and sat down, leaning his head against her thigh, waiting to be pet like all the others. Amused, she chortled, but knelt down beside him and scratched the side of his neck affectionately. "How would you all feel about going for a run in the woods then?" she asked them, understandingly. "You must all feel very cooped up." Sirius barked happily and Hermione smiled, rolling her eyes. "I think that's enough for now anyway. Werewolves have a very low tolerance for sitting still and listening." She sighed, standing back up and giving a quick nod. "Next time we'll discuss familiar noises of communication," she assured, waving back to the woods. "Go on ahead, play. I'll meet you back at the Shrieking Shack later," she told them.
Brighton immediately jumped to his feet and rushed the trees, leaping up in the air every once and a while and batting at branches playfully. While Remus had the urge to follow suit, another part didn't like the idea of Hermione walking off into the woods alone. He walked over to her, nudging her side and looking up at her. She wrapped her hand around the far side of his neck, tugging lightly at the fur in a way that was oddly pleasant. "Don't worry about me. I've done the math, I'll be back at the Shrieking Shack after a ten minute hike. I have a book waiting and I'm sure I can fend of anything that comes my way. If I need you, I'll call for you. You'll know it's me," she reassured.
He wasn't completely satisfied and the wolf immediately made a whining noise of disagreement, nudging her again. If she wasn't braced for it, he likely would have knocked her clear over, but she simply swayed a bit. "Hey, I've been working with werewolves for six years, you don't think I can handle something smaller and much less strong?" she asked him, smiling.
The wolf inside bolstered at her words, feeling as if he were the reigning superior over all creatures. He answered her with a huffing snort and a waving of his head.
She seemed to understand this as she chuckled, "You're dying to go for a run, Remus. Let yourself have it. I will see you in the morning, bright and early."
He couldn't hold back the need to play any longer and finally nodded his head. He turned to her, pressing the side of his head against her stomach and nuzzling it in goodbye before he ran off, meeting Sirius half way and tackling him to roll across the ground. They hurried off into the woods, excited and ready to play. Remus let more of the wolf take over and relaxed a little so that he could enjoy the fresh air and playful attitude lingering inside. Hours were spent rolling in leaves and dirt, splashing in creeks and tackling his friends or nudging them around. He felt invigorated having enough human sense to know what he was doing and remember it. He didn't hurt himself once, instead using his time to stretch his limbs and roll down hills with all the enthusiasm of a child. He chased a few animals, simply for the fun of hunting, rather than the dark need to destroy something. He was lighthearted and calm with the effects of freedom.
Hours later, as the moon slipped from the sky, Remus felt his energy draining. The six friends made their way back to the Shrieking Shack, where they climbed inside to find Hermione fast asleep on the floor, a book half open in her hands. Remus knew that he would go through the painful change back in an hour or so and curled up a few feet away from her, Brighton doing the same. Sirius laid down in a ball in front of Hermione, burying his nose under one of his paws. James curled his legs underneath him and rested in front of her, his eyes drooping. Peter took his place beside Sirius, seeming to burrow up against his long fur, finding heat and comfort in it.
The wolf inside seemed to be sated for now, though Remus could still feel him somewhere inside. He stretched, yawing and rolling onto his side, his long limbs laying across the dusty floor. Hermione was fast asleep in front of him, her dark curls falling to frame her soft, pale face. Her lashes looked dark against her complexion and he found his eyes roaming her face, sharp and absorbing each and every crevice of her. He could smell her scent on the air, tinted with the light tinge of soap and a mildly flowery shampoo. The wolf shifted inside, finding her to be intriguing and exciting compared to most humans. His animal instincts wanted to cuddle her, sniff her hair as he fell asleep, even lick at her as if she were a fellow animal. His eyes fluttered with the need to fall asleep, though he knew he'd be awakened by the painful change soon to come. Still, he couldn't hold off the sandman any longer and he drifted away, inhaling deeply to imprint her soft, feminine scent on his senses.
Remus woke to excruciating pain. His heartbeat sped up so much he was sure it would burst. Fur retracted itself, bones moved back into human form, and his skin burned with each. His whole body was throbbing and thrumming, while his skin broke out in a heated sweat. His senses were still on high as he fell like a lump to the floor. He felt tiny and inconsequential compared to how he was before. His screams of anguish, mixed with Brighton's from a few feet away, seemed to be bouncing off the walls still, echoing back to him and banging around in his head loudly. He was stripped of any strength, feeling like a heavy body of limbs that couldn't twitch let alone hold him up. His throat was dry and he felt desperately parched. His gut was twisted and he felt the desire to retch. He was almost shaking, he was so tired.
He felt a calming hand running over his face and hair, cool and relaxing. His eyes were shut tight but he knew who it was. Her scent lingered near him and he'd never felt anyone touch him so gently before in his life. He felt heat against his cheek and realized his head was laying in her lap. Most wouldn't come near him after he'd just finished a transformation. Even his friends waited a little while because he sometimes lashed out, the last little bit of wolf in him didn't take kindly to being touched directly after. But she didn't consider it or simply didn't care. He sighed lightly with content, the top of his head rubbed against her stomach and he felt as though he could fall back asleep already. It usually took hours, but she had pulled him back from the strain as if it were the easiest thing in the world. He wondered if she did it with all werewolves or just him and a growl of jealousy escaped him as he thought of anybody else being so close to her.
"Shh," she murmured, her knuckles running lightly over his cheek. "Rest, Remus, when next you wake up, you'll be back at Hogwarts, with a chocolate bar waiting," she reassured, her voice soft and soothing. He wanted to reply, wanted to thank her, but his mouth wouldn't work. "James, put the other blanket around Brighton, please. We'll move them over soon." Remus found himself smiling against her thigh, certain now that she wouldn't be concentrating on Brighton like she was him.
He told himself that his small obsession with her would have to stop, that he was just leading himself down a path that would end badly, but neither he or the wolf were interested or able to stop his infatuation. Perhaps it was idol worship in some way, but some part of him was sure that even if she hadn't given him the opportunity for freedom, he would have still found her to be intoxicating. Her intelligence and wit, her beauty and strong beliefs, her passion for loyalty. By some stroke of fate, he had found his perfect half. It was only too bad about the age difference. It would be wrong for a student and Professor to have anything besides a professional partnership, wouldn't it? But hadn't they already created something outside of school? Wasn't she already a friend and confidant to at least three of the Marauders? Was that professional? He couldn't explain it really.
She wasn't like others. He felt as though she were sent to watch over them, to keep them safe, and all the same he felt as if part of her wasn't meant to be there. Not exactly. She appeared out of thin air, which wasn't really all that surprising, after all apparating had the same effect. But her destination appeared odd and rather convenient, given she arrived in front of a werewolf and happened to be a werewolf tamer. If he didn't trust her wholeheartedly he would have thought it suspicious, like Sirius still tended to. He got the feeling however that if it came down to her life or his, James', or Sirius', she would pick theirs over her own. For some reason he couldn't understand and wasn't sure he wanted to know, she considered them to be much more important than most. She held them in such high regard that it could be seen plainly in her face. He wasn't sure what they had done to deserve it, or if they even earned it, but he was content knowing that she would always be there to help them. It worried him that he felt as if they would need saving, but there was always a lingering feeling that they did.
A blanket fell around his body and he felt it being tucked in around him. "Usually he tries to walk," Sirius' voice could be heard telling her, rather loud and grating on his nerves.
"You're all seventeen now, you can use hovering charms on both of them. They should relax as much as possible, the energy drained from them is huge. I've studied it, he won't be so irritable and tired if we move him instead of letting him walk," she replied quietly.
"Never much liked having to half carry him anyway," Sirius joked. "He's much heavier than he looks."
"It's all the chocolate he eats," James quipped.
Hermione sighed, "Oh honestly, he's more fit than either of you. A werewolves metabolism works twice as hard. In fact, years from now when the both of you are fat and stooped over, he'll likely still be tall, lithe, and have all his hair," she told them, sounding amused.
"I'll never lose my hair!" Sirius and James exclaimed, sounding shocked and appalled.
Hermione laughed, rich and melodic. The sound sent a pleased shiver down Remus' back, which Hermione read wrong. "Oh," she said, sounding mildly worried, "we should hurry back. We need more blankets, I don't want their fevers causing problems." She shifted a bit beneath him and he momentarily wished they could just stay where they were and he could sleep in her lap.
"Peter, please grab my book for me," she said, politely. She carefully moved out from beneath Remus' head, holding it in her palms and then murmuring a hovering charm. She reached up and placed his arms on his stomach so they weren't left dangling down and then charmed the blanket to wrap around him tightly and not slip. He rather felt like he was in a cocoon and though he was already quite hot from his fever, he knew it was needed. "Sirius, why don't you walk ahead so you can stop the Whomping Willow, you have quicker reflexes," she told him.
"Flattery will get you everywhere," Padfoot said charmingly, before walking ahead out the door.
Remus dozed on and off during the trek back. The sky was still rather dark though the sun was beginning to rise far off. The school was in the distance, his drooping eyes caught sight of its large stature during one of the moments that his friends voice stirred him. Hermione walked next to him, her fingers running through his hair whenever he woke up, putting him back to sleep. "Almost there," she whispered and a small smile pulled at his lips. "One day," she continued, her mouth close to his ear as they walked, "you won't have to hide any longer. And even though the mornings are hard and tiresome, the nights will be just as filled with a content freedom that you'll never have to fear them again." She sighed, sounding wistful. "I've always found a sense of comfort in knowing that every werewolf who's passed my training has walked away with that. You will have that, Remus, I guarantee it. Freedom will be yours."
Remus was both comforted and worried about her words. What would he do when the day came that she moved on? How would he feel when she left to train others, believing that he no longer needed her assistance? How would he cope without her around? It seemed so odd to rely so much on her, but ever since she arrived, he felt the weirdest sense of togetherness with her. As if somehow she was supposed to be with him forever. He'd never believed in soul mates or fate before, but he often got the feeling that they were meant to be with each other. Was it just wishful thinking on his part? Was it just an infatuation that became hopeful? He opened his eyes as best he could and gazed up at her. She looked down, as if feeling his eyes, and smiled. Why was it that whenever she bestowed that sweet smile on him, his heart rose up to his throat? Maybe one day, when he wasn't a student and she wasn't his professor, he would have a chance. Maybe the future would grant him that beautiful possibility. He could hope.
A/N Hope you enjoyed this! I'm trying to update my other stories as soon as I can. The second half of my recent HHr story, "He Could Always Read Her", has been updated if you're interested. It's a rather humorous romance, more romance than comedic.
Thanks for reading, please review, it's very much appreciated.
Much Love,
-Amanda