The ownership of all characters related to and involving the novels of The Vampire Academy and Bloodlines Series remain the sole property of Richelle Mead, the Penguin Group and any affiliates.
No copyrights have been infringed on maliciously.
A/n: I was asked by a guest reviewer for The Engagement if I would consider doing a one-shot for Rose and Dimitri's wedding at some stage. I would, but not as a one-shot. It would be a short (hahhah) story including the rehearsal dinner, wedding, reception and probably the honeymoon.
By the Baring of my Soul
~ Chapter Ten ~
"Dimitri!"
Pausing with my hand hovering over the polished handle of the main assembly room door; I turned to see Emil marching towards me down the centre of the corridor lined with off-duty guardians from every part of the Academy grounds.
None of them wanted to miss out on the spectacle that was about to take place; I thought bleakly annoyance and anxiety playing havoc with my determination to find out the truth of what had happened between Rose and Stan.
Word of the disciplinary hearing had spread quickly throughout the campus in the fifteen minutes since Alberta had called for it; the unavoidable whispers and veiled glances had spread almost as quickly.
I had known what would be said even before it was…Hathaway is reckless, unpredictable, wild, irresponsible, rash, impulsive…a liability…a loose cannon. Belikov should have known better…what was he thinking…Alto was right…Alberta should have listened to him…she should be removed…she doesn't belong here…but it still didn't make hearing it any easier.
Their mistrust of my own motives meant nothing; I had meant what I said to Alberta…it was their almost eager readiness to vilify and scapegoat Rose that set my teeth on edge.
I didn't believe Stan's version of the events for a second. His animosity towards Rose made impartiality impossible even if he had convinced himself of what had happened, but the others were more than willing to believe his every word when they knew as well as I did that he couldn't be trusted around her.
Their own eagerness to take part as witnesses in the hearing; a rarity in our fold, was more than enough proof that they were willing to view her as a sacrificial lamb. It didn't matter to them that they would be watching the potential end to everything that Rose had worked so hard for…they had merely come to participate.
"Dimitri!"
Cursing softly beneath my breath, I curled my fingers inward and away from the door handle as Emil called out to me again.
It didn't help knowing that Rose was on the other side of the door. I could feel the irresistibility of her pull luring me through the panels of wood, but I knew that I couldn't get to her…not until the hearing began.
If only I could have found a way to speak to her, even for a few minutes. Not to reassure myself that what Stan had accused her of was false – my faith in her was absolute, but to see with my own eyes that she was unharmed in any way.
Jerking his head to the side and a small alcove off the main corridor that was further away from the others, I crossed the hallway and waited for Emil to reach me. A sitting member of the committee, Emil; along with Alberta and Celeste, would be the three that would act as judge, jury and in this case, the executioner of a career that had yet to begin.
Looking harassed as he joined me in the recess, Emil's blonde brows were drawn together over his eyes and met at a point at the slightly crooked bridge of a nose that had been broken at some point in his youth.
Normally easy-going and unruffled, he looked anything but as he asked in a low murmur, "you know what happened?"
Arching a brow in silent reply, I dug my hands into the pockets of the duster and rested my shoulder against the smooth wood panelling of the alcove, but my attention to his question was distracted by the arrival of Alberta, Celeste…and Stan.
Sneering at me, he nodded mockingly in my direction before turning back to Celeste. Alberta, having seen the gesture, glared at him sharply, but he paid her no attention. Eyeing me warily, she shook her head subtly in warning before turning away to open the door.
"This is bad, brother," Emil muttered heavily, pulling me back to him. "If I had any idea that Hathaway would do this, I would never had made the comment about her selling out Ozera"
Stiffening before I could stop myself, the look I gave him would have easily betrayed the frustration I felt. "She didn't sell him out, Emil."
Shaking his head at me at the others followed Alberta, his doubt was clear. "Listen, man. I know she's your student and no instructor wants to think badly of the novice they teach, but the evidence on this is overwhelming."
"Stan is the evidence, Emil."
"Yeah, and I know how you feel about him, but both Christian and Brandon are witnesses. Their stories match up word for word. She didn't protect either of them and you heard her with Alberta this morning. It's exactly the kind of stunt she loves to pull."
"Not with this. Yes, she was angry at not having Lissa assigned to her, but she would never, ever deliberately leave one Moroi, let alone two, exposed. Even for the field experience. I know her, Emil. She would find some other way of voicing or showing her displeasure, but not like this and not with Stan."
Straightening, I tucked the strands of escaping hair behind my ears. "She's been chomping at the bit for an opportunity to face-off against him…do you really think she would miss out on it just to prove her point? You're the one who said she would want to spill a little of his blood."
Snorting beneath his breath at the reminder, Emil looked on as the last of the witnessing guardians crossed the threshold.
"No…no I don't. But none of this makes sense. If all she's been waiting to do is prove herself whilst bruising Stan a little in the process, then why the hell did she freeze? We can't afford to lose any novices – especially female, but if she's not up to this…if she's going to be a liability…"
"She is ready for this, Emil…and as for the freezing, I don't know. I haven't been able to talk to her, but there's something else there. Something that I haven't figured out yet."
"Stan is pushing hard for her to be removed." He remarked casually, but the reaction his words created was anything but calm.
"Yeah, I know. Which way is Celeste leaning towards?"
"She's listening to Stan at the moment, so the lean is towards removal. Rose needs to explain herself whilst convincing the council not to remove her and be contrite whilst she's doing it. If she's going to flout procedure like she always does…if she's unapologetic and defiantly unreasonable, Alberta's going to have no choice but to remove her."
Nodding grimly at the truth of his words, Emil clapped my lightly on the shoulder before he headed into the hearing and left me standing alone in the hallway.
Contrite was not a word that Rose knew very well...this could be a recipe for disaster. Collecting myself, I followed him. The last to arrive, I closed the door quietly behind me and scanned the room quickly, but my eyes lingered on only one person.
Sitting rigidly on a chair placed in the centre of the room, Rose somehow managed to exude defiant rebellion and vulnerability all at the same time. Facing her accusers, she held the eyes of the committee that would decide her fate with an unflinching gaze fuming with angry indignation.
Relieved that physically there were no signs of any injuries, I walked along the edges of the room and sat in a chair behind and to Rose's right. If she had seen my arrival, she gave no outward appearance of it as I viewed her profile.
Chin stubbornly set, lips tightly compressed and a flush of angry colour highlighting her highly angled cheekbones, Rose impatiently brushed aside strands of hair curling against her jaw and tucked them behind her ear as a weighted silence fell over the room and the murmuring guardians turned their attention to Alberta as she cleared her throat.
Sitting in the middle of a long mahogany table and flanked by Emil to her left and Celeste to her right; Alberta shuffled her paperwork and read over what I could only assume were the charges that Rose faced.
"Miss Hathaway. You are facing a disciplinary hearing today for dereliction of duty. The primary charge brought against you is the deliberate endangerment of Moroi by way of your refusal to protect them. The secondary charge is your refusal to stand in defense against their attacker; Guardian Alto in any way, shape or form in order to protect them."
Shifting in her seat, the muscles of Rose's back became taut lines of fury; the line of angry colouring along her cheekbones became flaming flags of the same emotion.
"Do you understand the charges, Miss Hathaway?"
Exhaling slowly in a controlled movement which would have cost her every ounce of limited self-control she possessed, Rose replied in a measured, concise manner which gave me hope that she realised how serious a situation she was in and was going to behave accordingly.
"Yes, Guardian Petrov. I understand."
Folding her hands together, Alberta cocked her head to the side at Rose's reply. Clearly surprised by the nature of her response, there almost seemed to be a thin thread of approval relaxing the tightly gathered muscles of Alberta's face.
"Good. Do you have anything to say regarding the charges?"
"Yes, Guardian Petrov, I do."
"What do you have to say, Miss Hathaway?"
"That I can't believe I'm being thrown under the bus!" she burst out, sitting forward and glaring at the three in agitation. "I've told you all already what happened. Why won't any of you believe me?"
"Miss Hathaway – " Alberta reprimanded sternly; her approval evaporating in the face of her irritation.
"For the last time," she ground out from between clenched teeth. "I didn't do it on purpose."
Waiting for her to continue; to deny that she had refused point blank to protect either Christian or Brandon, I felt the air in my lungs compress into a heavy feeling of stunned disappointment when the denial didn't come. Rose merely sat there and refused to explain herself further…to offer any answers to the questions racing through my mind.
It barely registered with me that Stan's accusations were right. That the whispers and rumours that would swirl around the school would be based on truth for once and not gossip…what mattered to me, was that the faith and belief I had in Rose was beginning to slip.
Forcing myself away from the agony of the realisation that I never thought I would have or the uncertainty that it brought with it, I focused my scattered concentration on the proceedings.
There would be time later to pick it apart.
Narrowing her eyes ominously enough for most to back down instantly, Alberta was trying her best to remain impartial, but Rose wasn't doing herself any favours by continuing to rage…something she had done at orientation this morning and something that Alberta now reminded her about.
"Miss Hathaway. You must know why we have a hard time believing that."
Nodding in agreement beside her, Celeste – who had remained silent during the hearing so far – spoke up for the first time. "Guardian Alto saw you. You refused to protect two Moroi – including the one whose protection you were specifically assigned to."
Cheeks flushing a brighter red as her infamous temper began to boil over the lid of her control, Rose shifted forward agitatedly in her chair to emphasise her displeasure with Celeste's remark as she all but shouted, "I didn't refuse. I…fumbled."
Hearing a softly scoffing sound of disbelief to the left of where I sat, Stan stood up from his seat. "That wasn't a fumble," he corrected harshly, glancing over towards Rose who had slumped slightly in her seat at his voice.
Looking away from her, he turned his focus to Alberta; seeking her permission to speak and address the committee with a smoothly, conniving facade. None of the raw aggression that had been present in the office earlier was anywhere to be found. He needed to keep his calm if he was going to prove a point to the committee.
"May I?"
Gaining her permission with a nod, he turned to face Rose and directly argue against her excuse. "If you'd blocked or attacked me and then messed up, that would be a fumble. But you didn't block. You didn't attack. You didn't even try. You just stood there like a statue and did nothing."
Flinching slightly, I covered it with a shrug of my shoulders beneath my coat. Hearing those accusations now were no easier to hear than they had been before…only now, I knew they were true.
Jerking upright in outrage, Rose's head swivelled around to answer Stan's accusation with a voice tightened by fury. "Why am I getting into trouble for messing up? I mean, I saw Ryan mess up earlier. He didn't get in trouble. Isn't that the point of this whole exercise? Practice? If we were perfect, you'd already have unleashed us upon the world!"
Some of Stan's poise began to slip at Rose's flippancy; the veins that had been bulging earlier were now on the brink of ripping though his skin; the flow of blood beneath them was clearly visible.
"Weren't you listening?" he snapped. "You didn't mess up, because 'messing up' implies that you have to actually do something."
Sizing him up rebelliously, Rose knew that she was rubbing him the wrong way and wasn't about to back down. "Okay, then. I froze. Does that count as messing up? I cracked under the pressure and blanked out. It turns out I wasn't prepared. The moment came, and I panicked. It happens to novices all the time."
This was true, I reasoned with myself, but not with her…she was no ordinary novice and as I thought it through further, I also realized that there was something else about her defence that was not ordinary and it helped to relieve the tightness in my chest.
She was hiding something.
It gave me renewed hope that chased away the disappointment and also reminded me that my faith in her couldn't be so easily broken…that I should never have thought for a single second that it ever could be.
Emil leaned forward and clasped his hands together; looking to speak for the first time. He was careful not to catch my eye, but there seemed to be an ulterior motive as he asked. "To a novice who has already killed Strigoi? It seems unlikely."
"Oh, I see. After one incident, I'm now expected to an expert Strigoi killer?" Rose muttered sarcastically, sliding further into her chair as her arms crossed defiantly over her chest in a display of glaringly obvious mutiny. "I can't panic or be afraid or anything? Makes sense. Thanks, guys. Fair. Real fair."
Tapping her fingers against the wood, Alberta warily exhaled before addressing Rose. "We're arguing semantics. Technicalities aren't the point here. What's important is that this morning, you made it very clear you did not want to guard Christian Ozera. In fact…I think you even said you wanted us to be sure we knew that you were doing it against your will and that we'd soon see what a horrible idea it was."
Twisting her lips to the side, Rose mumbled something beneath her breathe that didn't seem flattering to either herself or to Alberta. She was only now realising the rashness of her words.
"And then," Alberta pressed. "When your first test comes around, we find you completely and utterly unresponsive."
Surging forward in her seat, I had the instinctive reaction to reach out and stop Rose, but my hands stayed in the pockets of the duster. Touching her now would be a mistake.
"That's what this is about?" she voiced incredulously, looking genuinely outraged by her realisation of what she was actually being accused of. "You think I didn't protect him because of some kind of weird revenge thing?"
"You aren't exactly known for calmly and gracefully accepting things you don't like," Alberta voiced drolly.
"Not true," Rose defended loudly, jumping to her feet and pointing an accusatory finger at Alberta who looked as though she had just been slapped. "I have followed every rule Kirova laid down for me since coming back here. I've gone to every practice and obeyed every curfew."
"There's no reason I'd do this as some kind of revenge! What good would it do? Sta— Guardian Alto wasn't going to really hurt Christian, so it's not like I'd get to see him punched or anything. The only thing I would accomplish is getting dragged into the middle of something like this and possibly facing removal from the field experience."
"You are facing removal from the field experience," Celeste replied flatly, eyeing her with a coldly unsympathetically gaze.
Watching the shock of what I had feared would become a reality deflate her defiance and bravado, Rose's legs lost their strength and she sat down heavily, whispering a quiet, "Oh."
Unable to watch or listen to this for a second longer, I made my opinion known. "She has a point. If she were going to protest or take revenge, she'd do it in a different way." Standing, I closed the distance between us and stood at her side.
I might still feel a mixture of confusion, hope and faith, but that didn't change how I felt about Rose or the fact that I would do anything that I could to protect her and the future that was still in danger.
"Yes," Celeste agreed reluctantly. "But after the scene she made this morning…"
"This is all circumstantial," was my smooth reply. Charm was a natural advantage that I rarely felt I had to employ unless it was strictly necessary…and right now, it was necessary. "Regardless of how suspicious you think it looks, there's no proof. Removing her from the experience – and essentially ruining her graduation – is a bit extreme without any certainties."
Emil, I could see, was supressing a grin at my words, whilst Alberta and Celeste couldn't find fault with the logic of my comments. Ignoring the baleful glares I could feel traveling towards me from Stan in my peripheral, I waited patiently for their verdict.
During the whispered conference between the three, I had an opportunity to look at Rose for longer than a second…and the sight of her caused my chest to tighten in a way that was becoming all too familiar. And altogether dangerous.
"Miss Hathaway," Alberta began as Celeste and Emil returned to their seats and once again faced her. "Do you have anything you'd like to say before we tell you our conclusion?"
Waging an inner war with herself as she thought on a dozen different answers, Rose eventually settled with a quiet, biddable reply that couldn't have been more out of place for the girl who was anything but docile.
"No, Guardian Petrov. Nothing more to add."
Nodding warily, as if she had only just ended a hard-fought battle and wasn't quite sure if she had won or lost, Alberta passed the verdict.
"All right. Here's what we've decided. You're lucky you have Guardian Belikov to advocate for you, or this decision might have been different. We're giving you the benefit of the doubt. You'll go on with the field experience and continue to guard Mr. Ozera. You'll just be on a probation of sorts."
Sighing quietly in relief beside me, Rose nodded quickly as her fingers unknotted from her lap. "That's okay. Thank you."
"And," Alberta added ominously enough for Rose to sit straight up again. "Because the suspicion isn't entirely removed, you'll be spending your day off this week doing community service."
Launching from her chair again, Rose shrieked, "what?" as my hand shot out and curled around her wrist. I had been better prepared this time to anticipate her reaction. Holding her at my side, my grasp was gentle, but unbreakable and as always, the frisson of aware that arced between us was enough to make my pulse pound unsteadily through my veins during a time when I needed it steady.
"Sit down," I whispered into her ear as I bent over and pulled her back to her chair in one movement. "Take what you can get."
Not appreciating Rose's response or lack of graceful acceptance for what she would consider a punishment far too lenient to fit the crime, Celeste narrowed her eyes warningly. "If that's a problem, we can make it next week too. And the next five after that."
Listening to my advice and aware that Celeste could make things as difficult for her as Stan could, Rose sat down and shook her head as I released my hold, apologizing almost at once. "I'm sorry. Thank you."
Shuffling her paperwork again, Alberta collected it and stood. "The hearing has hereby come to a close. Miss Hathaway, please return to your normal schedule and find Mr. Ozera immediately. Your services as punishment will be handed over to Father Andrews after the church service has ended on Sunday. You will report to him and he will report to me as to whether or not he found it to be satisfactory. Is that understood?"
Nodded once, Rose looked her squarely in the eye with a vitality that was never waning even as I could hear the exhausted wariness in her voice. "Yes, Guardian Petrov. I understand."
"Good."
Walking around the table, Alberta caught my eye and slowed her departure as the others left. She would know that I wanted to talk to Rose alone and motioned Stan to leave ahead of her. He wanted to argue, but she wasn't looking at him.
Throwing a daggered glare over his shoulder towards me, he stomped off ahead of Emil who sent me a look of equal intensity, only his was a warning and not a threat. Stan couldn't argue with the verdict of three guardians in the middle of a hearing, but that didn't mean he was going to accept the leniency of Rose's punishment easily.
Resting my hand briefly on her right shoulder and ignore the throb of attraction, I bent to murmur in her ear. "Wait here for me. I'll be right back."
Approaching Alberta, I recognized the look of resignation on her face even before I spoke. "Do you really think talking to her will get the answers you need?" She asked quietly, looking beyond my shoulder to the girl still sitting where I had left her.
"There's something more there, Alberta. Something she's not telling us. I think you know that as well as I do and I think that's why you were merciful."
"I was merciful because we can't afford to lose a guardian of her potential and is there really something she's hiding…or is that just what you want to believe, Dimitri?" Glancing guardedly at me, Alberta gave me a look that resembled compassion before leaving me alone with my student and the task that lay ahead.
The quiet click of the door behind her might have signalled that the hearing had ended, but I knew the difficult part – the part that involved me trying to pry the truth from Rose – was just beginning…