A/N: Well, I kept busy during the weekend and finished two whole chapters! Happy reading, everybody!

(Note: Some dialog taken directly from the episode.)

Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer and its characters are the property of Joss Whedon.

What have I became

in this false fantasy?

Thriving on something sweet,

submerging into another world.

Without it I tumble

transforming into nothing.

I'm locked in a stalemate

not capable to stir.

Look closely through my eyes,

as deep as the end of sight.

See! My ailment and do

your very best to repair.

Save me from this ogre

I have become, before

I sit in a dark painful void...

lost inside my addiction.

-Addiction, by Claire Nixon

Buffy gradually woke to find her head pillowed against something firm and cool. It rose and fell in a slow, comforting rhythm. Her eyes cracked open to see a span of pale skin; she was lying on Spike's bare chest. Buffy mumbled and snuggled closer, then gasped and sat up, staring around her with wide, bewildered eyes. She and Spike were both sprawled in the middle of what looked like a bomb site. Rubble and broken timbers were piled up all around them, thin shafts of light cutting through the gaps. Buffy looked down at herself and saw she wore nothing but Spike's duster draped over her like a blanket. Spike didn't even have that much on. Both of their bodies were covered in scratches and bruises. What the hell did they do last night?

Oh, right, we... She felt the heat rise to her cheeks and bit back a giddy laugh. Her smile broadened as she saw the vampire start to rouse. He looked up at her with sleep-glazed eyes. As they slowly cleared, he smiled drowsily. "Hey."

"Hey. Um," she looked around them, "When did the building fall down?"

Spike followed her gaze to their surroundings. A quiet, surprised chuckle escaped him. "I don't know. Must have been sometime between the first time and the, uh..." His eyes met hers and he grinned.

"Oh." Buffy smiled back. Then the realization occurred that those beams of light were in fact sunlight and she jumped to her feet in panic. "Oh, my god! It's morning!"

Spike watched, bemused, as Buffy scrabbled about, collecting her strewn clothes while at the same time trying to keep herself covered with his coat. As if he wasn't familiar with every freckle of her body after last night.

Buffy got dressed quickly, her hair still a frazzled mess, and hopped on one foot as she pulled on the single boot she'd found. Once it was on, she began searching for its mate. "Shoe. I need my shoe," she muttered to herself.

"What's the hurry, luv?" Spike asked, still lounging naked on the floor.

"I left Dawn all night."

"Not alone," Spike reasoned, "I'm sure Red was there to see to the Niblet."

"That's not the point! I've never been gone this long before without getting word back to let them know I'm okay. They're probably frantic." She found her second boot wedged between a couple of fallen boards and put it on.

"I just don't see why you have to run off so quick. Thought we could..." he smirked suggestively.

Buffy gave him an incredulous look. "Again? Wasn't last night's marathon enough?" She saw her denim jacket draped over some rubble across the room and moved to fetch it. Spike suddenly grabbed her as she started past him and yanked her down onto his lap. "Spike!" Buffy squirmed, "Let me go!"

"Make me," he taunted, then pulled her into a breath-stealing kiss. Buffy's willpower melted and she flung her arms around him. "Mmm, no," she protested feebly, "I have—I have to go."

"Stay," Spike panted against her lips, "I'm stuck here. Sun's out." He rolled them until Buffy's back was on the ground. She moaned as his mouth traveled down to her neck. His lips brushed against the scar left by the previous vampires that had bitten her: the Master, Angel, Dracula. They'd all left their mark on her. A possessive growl rumbled in Spike's throat. He wanted to sink his fangs into her flesh and obliterate those interlopers' marks, show the world the Slayer was his and only his. It took all his self-control to keep from slipping into his gameface and doing just that. Instead, he sucked hard on those puckered scars, causing Buffy to arch beneath him. His hands pulled up her skirt and he settled himself between her open legs. She was already wet and ready for him. He slid in, groaning at the feel of her tight heat enveloping him. He raised himself onto his arms and gazed down at her as he began to move in slow thrusts.

"I knew it," his voice quavered, "I knew the only thing better than killing a Slayer would be fucking one."

Buffy laughed. Oh, my god. He's as bad as me! His emotions run high and he blabs out the first thing in his head. It was a trait they shared; one which had gotten Buffy in trouble more than once. If she hadn't understood that about him his tactless words would have pissed her off. "That's what this is about?" she teased, "Doing a Slayer?"

"I wouldn't throw stones, pet. You seem to be quite the groupie yourself." He leaned down to breathe in her ear, "Vampires get you hot."

"Not vampires," she sucked on his earlobe, "You. Just you."

"Oh, god, Buffy," her words drove him to quicken the pace, "I love you. Love you so bloody much."

"Spike!" Buffy keened. Her body trembled as she reached her peak. Spike buried his face in the crook of her neck and moaned, his own climax washing over him.

They lay together in the blissful afterglow. Buffy ran her hands over the planes of his back. In the indirect light of morning, Spike's skin had an almost golden hue. "You're beautiful," she whispered.

Spike stirred, raised his head just enough to kiss her. Unlike their passion-fueled kisses before, this one was sweet and gentle. When it ended, Buffy's brow furrowed in remorse. "I-I really have to—"

"I know," he sighed, "Little Bit needs you."

"I'm sorry."

"It's okay," he smiled, "I'll be fine here 'til sunset." He withdrew from her with a sigh of regret and got up, helping Buffy to her feet. He found his jeans lying nearby and slipped them on. "I'll see you again tonight, yeah?" There was the faintest hint of uncertainty in his voice.

Buffy brought her hand to his cheek. "Yeah." She leaned in and kissed him. "Tonight can't come soon enough. I love you."

"Love you, too." He watched her start to pick her way through the rubble towards the basement's exit. "Buffy."

She turned, a question in her eyes.

Spike reached into the back pocket of his jeans and pulled out the frilly bit of lace that was her thong underwear. "You, uh, gonna want these, too?" He smirked.

When she arrived home Buffy passed Tara in the hall on her way out. The quiet blonde woman kept her head down, and Buffy was too surprised and sleep-deprived to say anything before Tara was out the door. She wandered into the kitchen to find Dawn behind the breakfast bar and Willow and Amy standing by the backdoor. The latter two women looked just as worn out as Buffy felt.

"Buffy!" Dawn exclaimed, "Where were you? Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." Buffy made her careful way to one of the stools.

"You're not," Dawn disagreed in obvious worry, "You're all sore and limpy."

"I-I'm not sore," Buffy winced as she slowly lowered herself onto the stool, "I just, uh, had a fight. Y'know, the all-nighter kind."

This explanation seemed to reassure her sister a little. "Figured. I knew that's why you didn't call. So, what's the big bad? Should we be worried?"

Buffy bit her lip, hoping no one noticed the blush she felt coming on. "Nooo. I think you guys are safe." She quickly changed he subject, "Tara was here?"

"I guess she stayed over with Dawn," Willow said.

Buffy frowned. "You guess? Where were you?"

"We went out," Willow indicated herself and Amy, "Kinda lost track of time."

"Oh." Great. As if Buffy didn't feel guilty enough about not coming home last night.

"I-I never would have if I knew you weren't coming home," Willow stammered, unwittingly compounding her friend's remorse.

"No, o-of course," she hurried to reassure the redhead, "I mean, you know...it wasn't intentional. And, y'know, everyone's safe." She turned to her sister. "You are, right? You're okay?"

"Oh, yeah! I mean, um, I think my pancakes are burning, but..." The teen shrugged.

Willow went to the stove and turned off the burner. She stared down at the ruined pancake, a lump forming in her throat.

"Tara was making them," Dawn explained unnecessarily.

Willow shook herself out of her sad reverie. "I've, uh...I've got to get some sleep."

"Me too," Buffy said, rising from her seat.

Amy nodded and headed for the door. "Yeah, I should go home. Dad's expecting me."

"Okay, I'll call you later," Willow said to her. Amy waved and left the house.

Buffy took a step closer to Dawn, her expression concerned. "Are you sure you're alright? I'm sorry about everything."

"It's okay," Dawn shrugged again, "You should rest. You're beat from monster wrestling all night."

You have no idea, Buffy thought. "Yeah. Right. Thanks."

"Yeah, I'm gonna crash, too," Willow stated, following Buffy upstairs to their bedrooms.

"And I'll just...go find some awake people," Dawn sighed.

One of the advantages of being the Slayer: quick recovery time. After a few hours of near-comatose sleep, Buffy woke refreshed and mostly ache-free. She took a long shower and changed into some fresh clothes. Some makeup covered the more visible bruises—some of them gained during the sparring match with Spike, the rest from the subsequent rigorous activities. She started to tie her hair back when she noticed a massive hickey on the side of her neck that all but obscured her bite scars. Buffy snorted in amusement and left her hair down instead. Wasn't like she hadn't left a few hickeys of her own on Spike's fair skin.

Satisfied with her appearance, Buffy left her bedroom and headed for the stairs. Along the way she noticed the door to Willow's room was closed. Apparently the redhead still had a lot of sleep to catch up on.

Buffy found Dawn in the living room watching TV and snacking on a bag of Doritos. The teen smiled brightly in greeting. "Afternoon, sleepyhead! Feeling better?"

"Much." Buffy sat down next to her. "Hey, Dawn, can I talk to you for a sec?"

The girl muted the TV. "What's up?"

"There's something I need to tell you. About last night."

"This about how you got that hickey?"

Buffy's eyes widened. Her hand flew to her neck. "You saw that?"

Dawn grinned. "Yeah, when you got home. I don't think Willow noticed, though."

"Oh. Good. I mean, I'm not ready to share this with any of the others. But I thought you should know..."

"So, who is it?" Dawn leaned forward eagerly. "Anybody I know?"

Buffy felt a smile pulling at her lips. "Spike."

Dawn's eyes bugged, then she squealed and flung her arms around her older sister's neck. "Ohmigod! I knew it!"

Relieved by the teen's enthusiastic response, Buffy laughed and hugged her back. "I take it you're not unhappy."

The girl drew back. "Are you kidding? I totally saw this coming! You've been acting different around him ever since you came back." Dawn practically bounced up and down in excitement. "He totally loves you, y'know."

"I know," Buffy smiled, "I love him, too."

"So, does this mean he'll start coming by more?"

"Maybe." Buffy shifted in her seat. "I'm not all that ready to let the others know about this. I only told you because I thought you had a right to know. I'd like to keep it between us for now."

Dawn nodded emphatically. "No problem. I totally get it. You're not ready to deal with everybody's judgeyness."

"Yeah," Buffy grimaced. Much as she loved her friends, she knew they wouldn't understand or condone her relationship with Spike. She would tell them eventually, but for now she just wanted to enjoy what she and the vampire now had.

"Thanks for telling me." Dawn smiled in gratitude.

Buffy kissed the girl's forehead. "Nobody I trust with this more than you, Dawnie."

Buffy spent the rest of the afternoon and evening at the Magic Box with Xander and Anya; more fruitless research on the diamond-stealing frost-monster. Whatever this thing was, it didn't exist in any of the books. Buffy was beginning to wonder if it was some kind of man-made creature, like Adam.

When night fell, she called home to let Dawn know she was going out on patrol.

"With Spike?" the girl asked, her sly grin obvious even over the phone.

"Probably," Buffy replied primly, "I'll try to be home at a more reasonable hour, though. No more all-nighters for a while."

"It's okay if you do. Willow's here, so I won't be alone."

"I'll see you later. Love you, Dawnie."

"Have fun 'patrolling,'" the teen giggled and hung up.

Buffy rolled her eyes, then left the magic shop and headed for Restfield Cemetery.

She sensed him before she saw him. Her entire body tingled in anticipation as Spike stepped into view from behind a mausoleum. He stood with his hands in his duster pockets, mouth stretched in a suggestive grin. "Slayer," he drawled. His teeth curled behind his teeth.

Buffy's plan to play it cool flew away as she practically lunged at him. The impact of her body against his sent Spike staggering until his back collided with the wall of the mausoleum. He chuckled into Buffy's mouth as she hungrily kissed him. "Thought you wanted to patrol," he said when their lips finally parted.

"Patrol later," she panted, half dragging him in the direction of his crypt. Spike wasn't about to argue.

The night before had been about passion and release. This time, they made love slowly, exploring each other's bodies with soft caresses and questing lips. They whispered tender words of love as they moved together in perfect harmony. It was an aspect of their eternal dance that they hadn't experienced before. They held each other afterwards, reluctant to break the afterglow.

"I didn't know I could get this happy," Buffy murmured and snuggled closer. She was sorely tempted to blow off patrol altogether and just stay with Spike in his crypt. But as usual, her sense of duty nagged at her conscience. Spike coaxed her into showering with him in the makeshift stall he'd set up—as well as indulging in a wet and slippery quickie—then the two of them dressed and went out on patrol. It was a fairly busy night; they dusted about a dozen fledgelings in all. Spike then walked Buffy home where they spent a few more minutes kissing on the front porch before finally parting ways. All in all, not a bad night.

Buffy's mood dimmed a little when she found out Willow had gone out with Amy again. Dawn insisted she was okay on her own, but Buffy was worried. This behavior was out of character for Willow. Buffy knew she needed to talk to her friend, but Willow didn't return until early morning and Buffy didn't want to disturb the redhead's sleep. So, she let it go for now.

Buffy spent the next day much like she had the day before; research at the Magic Box, followed by patrol that night with Spike. Her guilt over the other night prompted her to phone the house every hour to check in with Dawn, at least until the patrol part. It was hard to focus on anything else lately when in the presence of her vampire lover.

Spike grinned as soon as he saw Buffy with her hair styled in the braided pigtails he mentioned liking. She also had on her black turtleneck to cover the hickey from her friends' prying eyes. This time, Spike and the Slayer did their patrol first, then spent the last couple of hours in the vampire's bed.

Spike sprawled lazily in bed as he watched Buffy put her clothes back on. "You can't stay?"

Buffy shook her head, her reluctance obvious. "Willow's been going out with Amy lately. I need to get home so Dawn won't be alone." She finished putting on her sweater, then leaned down to kiss the tired vampire one last time. Spike ran his fingers over one of her braids and gave it a playful tug.

"'Til tomorrow, then," he smiled, eyelids drooping.

"Yeah. Night, Spike." Buffy left the sanctuary of the crypt and returned home.

The house was quiet when she stepped inside, although the lights were on. Buffy frowned. "Hello?"

She thought she heard something upstairs. She climbed the steps, made her way to the doors leading to the bedrooms. "Willow? Dawn?"

There was a sound from Willow's room. She walked in to find the place in disarray, things strewn about, drawers half opened. The hairs on the back of her neck rose and she spun around in time to see Amy trying to sneak out. Buffy grabbed her and shoved her against the door. "What's going on?"

Amy cringed. "Uh oh. Busted."

"Where's Willow?"

The woman's eyes darted nervously, bringing to mind the rodent she used to be. "She said—She said I could—Wait!" she cried as Buffy pried a plastic bag from her fingers. It was full of what looked like half-crushed leaves. "It's not what you think it is," Amy blurted anxiously, "It's sage."

Buffy glared at her. "That is what I think it is." She tossed the bag aside, gripped Amy's shoulders. "What's going on? Where's Willow and Dawn?"

"Well...I saw—I saw her, but that was..." Amy blinked, distracted. "I like your coat. When does a Slayer find the time to shop?"

Buffy gritted her teeth in impatience. Amy's jitteriness was getting on her nerves. She tried to get her back on subject. "So they didn't let you in," she accused.

Amy looked away. "Not that they know of."

"What else did you take?"

"Nothing."

Buffy roughly searched through the woman's pockets. She pulled out a handful of items she recognized as ingredients Willow used in her spells.

"Please, I need this stuff!" Amy begged, "Willow wants me to have it. She understands."

"Understands what?" Buffy snapped, "Breaking into someone's house for kitchen spices? No, I don't think so."

Amy glared at her. "You should. She's as bad as I am. Worse. I bet she's at Rack's right now."

Buffy felt a sense of dread begin to take hold. "Rack's?"

"A place. H-He does spells. Heavy stuff," Amy explained. "Willow's his new favorite," she added bitterly.

"She's there? With Dawn?" Buffy shoved the other woman against the door, her anxiety growing.

Amy groaned, "Oh, don't shake me again. Super strength. I think I'm gonna boot."

"Then tell me where this place is and I won't."

"It's downtown, but it moves. I-I'm not sure where it would be tonight, exactly."

Buffy shook her again. "Tell me how to find it!"

"You just kinda have to feel it out!" Amy's complexion took on a greenish cast. "Oh, god, I think I'm gonna— Oh, god..." She put a hand over her mouth and made a mad dash for the bathroom. Buffy turned away in disgust and hurried out the door. Her instincts screamed at her that something bad was going to happen. She needed to find Willow and Dawn.

Spike's dream about an earthquake morphed into a pair of hands shaking him by the shoulders. He blinked away the last dregs of sleep and gazed up at Buffy's worried face.

"God, do you sleep through anything?" she exclaimed, "I was, like, yelling, and nothing."

Spike groaned and sat up. "I'm a bit knackered. Had a long night." He grinned suggestively. The bedsheets pooled around his hips, low enough to show that he was still naked. Had Buffy been in a less agitated state of mind, she would have found the sight drool-worthy.

She grabbed his jeans from the floor and handed them to him. "Get dressed. Dawn's missing."

The vampire rolled his eyes. "Again? Ever think about a LoJack for the girl? What's the story?"

Buffy nervously shifted from one foot to the other. "She went out with Willow."

Spike chuckled, "Willow? That's kind of a sorry excuse to come by. You want the touch, all you need to do is—"

"Spike," Buffy interrupted, "Willow's into something, okay? Her and Dawn have been missing for hours. There's some guy named Rack."

"Rack?" Spike visibly tensed at the name.

"Yeah, he's, uh, some kind of—"

"I know who he is. He deals in magic. Black stuff. Dangerous."

Buffy wasn't happy to hear that her worries weren't for nothing. "I've been all over downtown and I can't find his place."

"Because he cloaks it," Spike said, "You can't feel it unless you're into the big bad. A witch or a vampire."

"So, let's go."

Spike threw on his clothes while Buffy fidgeted. The second his bootlaces were tied, they left the crypt and headed downtown. They wandered the nearly deserted streets, Spike straining his senses for any hint of Rack's hidden lair.

"Anything?" Buffy asked for what seemed like the hundredth time.

"Not yet," Spike replied, a slight edge to his voice, "I might pick up on it if you'd stop asking me every two seconds."

Buffy chewed her lip. "I knew Willow was acting strange. She hasn't been the same since Tara left. If anything happens to her or Dawn—"

"Let's focus on finding them first." Spike reached down and took her hand in his. "They're probably fine, luv."

"I should've been there for Willow," Buffy berated herself. She squeezed Spike's hand, taking a small measure of comfort in the vampire's presence.

"You're not responsible for her choices, luv," Spike gently chided.

"But I am responsible for Dawn," Buffy sighed under the familiar weight of guilt.

They were passing an empty parking garage when they heard Dawn's screams. Buffy rushed ahead, Spike close behind her. She saw her sister being attacked by some kind of mangy ape-like demon. Buffy tackled the creature, knocking them both to the ground. They rolled on the concrete, then leapt to their feet and began exchanging blows. Spike, meanwhile, went to check on Dawn. He knew Buffy could handle this demon on her own.

The creature suddenly stopped and began to shake.

"Now you're scared?" Buffy remarked, "Better late than never."

The demon let out a prolonged croak and smoke began to pour from its skin. Within moments it seemed to burn from the inside until it was nothing but a pile of dying embers. Willow limped into view, power crackling from her hands and obsidian-black eyes. Blood seeped from a cut at her hairline.

Buffy stared at her in cold anger, then Dawn's whimpers caught her attention and she hurried to her sister's side. Spike was trying to coax the teen into letting him look at her arm. She was cradling it to her chest.

"Dawn, are you okay?" Buffy knelt beside her.

Dawn sobbed, "H-He was after Willow. She made the car drive. Don't!" She flinched away from Buffy's touch.

"Honey, let me look at it," Buffy tried to sound soothing.

"Think it's broken," Spike told her, his voice low.

"Dawnie?" Willow staggered towards them. "Oh, god. There's blood."

Buffy ignored the redhead and said to Spike, "We need to get her to a doctor." She and the vampire helped Dawn stand and supported them between her as they started to walk away.

Willow stumbled after them. "Is she okay? Is she okay?" Her voice was frantic.

"Back off, Will. I got her." Buffy didn't even try to hide her anger.

Willow reached out to them. "Dawnie..."

"I mean it. Stay away from her."

Willow maneuvered herself in their path, bringing the trio to a halt. "Dawnie! Dawnie, I am so sorry!" she pleaded, "It was an accident. I didn't see. I'm so, so sorry."

Dawn glowered at the older woman, then lashed out with her uninjured hand, palm connecting with Willow's face in a resounding slap. Neither Buffy nor Spike said a word. They continued walking, leaving a distraught Willow behind them.

"Dawnie. Dawnie. Don't!" she cried, "Dawnie, I'm sorry. I'm sorry..." She fell to the ground in a broken, pathetic heap, weeping uncontrollably. "I'm sorry!"

Buffy hesitated in spite of herself and looked to Spike. He nodded to her unspoken request and continued on with Dawn while Buffy returned to stand in front of Willow. "Get up," she said coldly.

"I screwed it up. Everything...Tara..."

Buffy grabbed the distraught witch and hauled her to her feet. "Yeah, you know what? You did screw up, okay? You could have killed her! You almost did!"

"I know. I know," Willow sobbed, "I can't stop, Buffy. I've tried, and I can't."

"You can."

"I can't! I can't. I just... God! I need help! Please, please help me." Willow fell against her, clutching at her in desperation.

Buffy swallowed, her anger warring with her guilt, until she finally allowed her arms to circle her broken friend.

Dawn had a fractured arm and a mild concussion. But worse than that, she suffered a complete loss of faith in Willow and Buffy. Willow for putting her in danger, and Buffy for not preventing it.

"I can't blame her," Buffy told Spike later in her room. Willow and Dawn had fallen asleep a few minutes ago and Buffy had gone into her bedroom to find Spike waiting by her open window. She'd immediately stepped into the comfort of his waiting arms, her face buried in his chest while his chin rested atop her head. "I knew Willow was getting way too obsessed with magic. I should've seen this coming."

"Willow's a grown woman," Spike argued quietly, "You can't keep shouldering responsibility for what your friends do."

"She is my friend. My best friend. I should've been there for her and I wasn't." She tilted her head back to meet his gaze. "She needs me more than ever now. I can't turn away from her. And I can't..." her voice cracked, she swallowed, "I can't leave her alone while she's struggling with this." Which meant no more nights spent in his crypt for a while.

There was a flicker of hurt in his eyes, but he nodded in understanding. "I'll do patrol the next few nights."

"Thank you." Buffy blinked back her tears. "I don't know if I can handle this alone."

"You don't have to. I'm here for you."

"I know." Buffy lay her head against his chest again, taking solace in her lover's embrace.