A Long Time after the Reclamation of the One Ring:
It was raining. It was cold. It was foodless. Pippin had never been so miserable in his life. He did not know how long and how far he had ran from the Battle of Pelenor Fields or how many of his friends had died while he fled. He tried not to think about it.
Rain began to drip into the cave where the dejected hobbit tried to hide from the world. Just as Pippin stood to find relief deeper in the cave, he fell back as a burst of light filled his eyes. When he could see again, Pippin gasped. Before him was what looked like a large, glowing green door made of some kind of liquid.
Could it be Gandalf?
Pippin approached the glowing passage, though he bumped into a flailing figure that stumbled from the other side.
"Hey you suckers!" The person yelled to no one Pippin could see "Sorry it's been so long since the last update!"
"W...wh...what?" Pippin stammered. The strange man looked somewhat like a taller than average Hobbit, with a mess of shaggy brown hair and a crazed, sleep deprived look in in his eyes.
"OOOHHH Hey Pippin!" He embraced the Hobbit, who gagged when the man's alcohol laced breath hit his nostrils. "Sorry I never wrote anything about you. I kind of just thought you died on your way out of Chapter One!"
"Who the bloody hell are you?!?" Pippin yelled.
"Oh, I'm your Creator! Well not really, he's a much better writer than me, but I'm the writer of this shitty alternate reality fanfic. I'm pretty much the whole reason all of this went to shit, considering I gave the Ring back to Sauron, allowing him to kill Gandalf and all of your friends except for Aragorn who got turned into a wraith but Shadow of War stole that idea from me so now I'll probably have to change it."
"G...Gandalf is dead?" Pippin's eyes stung as his mind was filled with questions and his heart was filled with sorrow.
"Yep, oh and Sam died in the Dead Marshes in agony, Frodo got eaten by Shelob, and the Elves are murdering each other in a civil war based entirely on me watching Game of Thrones when I wrote chapter three and wanting a sex element in the story!"
Pippin curled up in a quivering ball and began to sob.
"Why?! Why would you do this to us?"
"Because I'm an asshole who likes to fuck with people's emotions! By the way, loyal readers," he began to talk to no one again, leaving the hobbit to sob, "I don't know when I'll ever start this back up again or even if I'll come back at all! Have fun wanting to know what happens! Now back to my miserable and passionless life of mediocrity!
LORDOFANGMAR, AWAY!!!!!!!
And he flew away into the sky, never to be heard from again (or until the next update).