Every day I have to look to the sun
To see where it was that
I have come from

Traveller In Time by Uriah Heep

"Wow." I say aloud watching Dereks retreating back. I forget Mark is still there until her places his hand on my shoulder.

"Cool huh?"

"Seriously. I get to scrub in on an advanced procedure. Seriously?"

Mark laughs "Seriously Doctor Grey. I'll be in the gallery. I have a free day. Have fun. And remember," he leans towards me and whispers in my ear "Not too much staring at Derek."

I blush furiously red, but Mark just laughs at my embarrassment.

Walking away he calls "Bye Grey" over his shoulder. Shaking my head I go off in search off Doctor Bailey to inform her of the surgery.

I'm sat on a gurney in one of the tunnels when Cristina catches up with me.

"Hey. I heard you're on an advanced procedure with McDreamy."

"What? Shepherd? McDreamy...?" I grin

Izzie joins us, "Are you talking about that Plastic surgeon? Cause he is hot."

"No, we're talking about McDreamy, not McSteamy."

"God, they'd cringe if they heard you call them that." I laugh.

Cristina looks at me and narrows her eyes. "Yeah?"

"I expect Mark would find it funny though. He is cocky like that!"

"Mark?"

"Mark Sloan, he's the plastics guy." I explain.

"How do you know them?"

"Oh, we met last night at the mixer, I took them to Joes, you know the bar over the road." The two nod.

"That's why you were late this morning?" asks Cristina accusations in her voice.

"God, no, well.. I mean, sure I overslept, but I overslept alone."

"Oh." I think they believe me. At least I hope they do. I look at my pager as it beeps.

"Pre-op!" I smile. "Will you be in the gallery?"

"Yep." Izzie smiles. I walk away turning back before I reach the corner.

"By the way, how did George do?"

Cristina smirks. "007."

"Ahh.. license to kill." I nod.

"Don't be mean" says Izzie, a hint of reproach in her voice. I turn back and see George walking past.

"Hi George."

"Hi Meredith." I carry on walking to my goal, forgetting all thoughts of his surgery going wrong when I walk into the scrub room. I look in through the window and see Katie lying on the table hair shaved and ready for us.

"You ready?" asks Derek, appearing beside me.

I nod, not trusting my voice.

"I had to promise to make her look cool." He smiles. "Apparently," putting on a peppy voice continues "being a bald beauty queen is like.. so the worst thing in the history of the world.."

I laugh and immediately my nerves are settled.

Hands clean he looks at me.

"Ready Doctor Grey?"

"Yes Doctor Shepherd." I smile.

A nurse pulls Dereks gloves on him whilst another does mine. Not that I need them as I am not actually gonna touch anything.

Walking towards the table Derek surveys the OR smiling behind his mask. I can tell his smiling as I hear it in his voice and see it in his eyes.

"Alright everybody. It's a beautiful night to save lives. Lets have some fun."

I stand in silence, watching Derek silently and skilfully work, hovering over the patient's brain, tools in his hand and headlamp shining bright. Derek looks up and nods for me to step forward, I widen my eyes silently asking "me?" he nods and I walk over. As I move I look up into the gallery into the faces I recognise, Doctor Bailey, Chief Webber, Izzie, Cristina and George, and Mark. They all smile encouragingly, except Cristina who just lessens her permanent scowl. I look Mark in the face and he winks, and suddenly I am standing over the open brain of Katie Bryce. Derek nods towards the microscope and I lean in looking down.

I silently think wow, tearing my eyes away I look at Derek,

"Welcome to the game Doctor Grey." he smiles before going back to work.

I wait outside the scrub room. Slumped in a hard plastic backed chair.

"48 hours over" Derek says coming from the room.

I nod. He glances at the chart in his hand.

"You helped save a life Doctor Grey. Be proud."

I look up into his smiling face. "Thank you Dr Shepherd." I smile shyly.

He looks at his watch. "We're both off. Want to grab some breakfast? Proper food. Not hospital crap?"

I gaze into his eyes. I should say no. I shouldn't go. I shouldn't be a friend of my attending. I shouldn't be flirting with my attending. If the others found out I was doing this they'd.. well what would they do? There is no explicit rule against this. And it's only breakfast. Work colleagues everywhere eat together all the time. Why shouldn't I?

I stand up and smile, eyes that were heavy from tiredness suddenly open wider, "I'd love to. See you in the lobby in 15?" I ask.

He nods and grins.

Walking off I smile.