Hey guys. Sorry there's no Jafar, Maleficent or Grimhilde in this chapter. They'll be in the next one.

I'm not that good at humor but I try my best and this idea popped into my head and I wanted to write it. No flames please. And thank you all for the reviews. They make my day.

All the characters belong to Disney. This chapter is dedicated to Nakajima Aya.

The lounge was dark and gloomy like the rest of the castle. Not many villains used it because the living room was large and spacious and all of them could be in there to discuss their plans. Cruella, Ursula and Hook were sitting down on the black and red chairs in the room. A glass table was in the centre of the chairs. Cruella drank some of her tea and placed the cup down on the table.

'I've been thinking darlings...' she started.

'Well I thought I could smell something burning.' Hook remarked, smirking evilly. Cruella picked up her cup without a single word and chucked her tea in Hook's face and then placed it back on the table. That would teach him a lesson for interrupting and insulting her. Hook jumped out of his seat after the boiling hot liquid reached his face.

'Ahhh blast you Cruella De Vil! Ow, hot, hot, hot!' Hook screamed in pain. He pulled his handkerchief out of his sleeve and wiped his face clean, although it didn't take away the pain. Hook ran out of the room and ran to the kitchen which was only a short distance from the lounge. When he arrived at the kitchen he opened the door, ran to the sink and turned the cold tap on. He splashed the cold water onto his face and sighed in relief when the pain subsided. After that he made his way back to the lounge.

'As I was say before I was rudely interrupted...Cruella continued when Hook entered the room and sat back down...why don't we talk to Grimhilde and Hades? Talking to Jafar and Mal will do us no good.' she suggested.

'But what will that accomplish?' Ursula asked. What was Cruella up to?

'We could try to convince them that Jafar and Mal are not the right people for them.' Cruella explained.

'And just how will that work? Oh wait weren't we the ones that convinced them to go on a blind date with those two in the first place? Oh bravo for coming up with that plan.' Hook drawled sarcastically.

'Would you like to have tea in your face again you twit?' Cruella threatened. Hook raised an eyebrow.

'You just go ahead and try my dear.' Hook challenged smirking at her.

'We don't have time for this nonsense so just shut up and listen!' Cruella ordered. 'Jafar and Mal have only been on two dates so it can't possibly be serious. All we have to do is point out how wrong they are for them. It's quite simple really darlings.' She explained.

'Do you really think that that's going to work angelfish? We haven't had much luck with our plans so far.' Ursula pointed out, taking a long sip of her coffee.

'Yes so I see darling...Cruella cast a deathly glare at Hook which Hook only rolled his eyes in response...but as they say if at first you don't succeed try, try again. And is our darling Hook going to join my plan or is he going to just lay about and do nothing like he usually does?' Cruella teased. Hook crossed his arms over his chest. 'Look who's talking but aye I'll help you out. I doubt you'll be able to convince Grimhilde AND Hades.' Hook remarked. Cruella stood up and slapped him across the face.

'Ow.' Hook shouted, rubbing his stinging cheek. He was really getting fed up with this humiliation and decided to get back at Cruella.

Cruella and Ursula made their way out of the room. Hook was about to drink his coffee but he had a better idea. He carried his cup in his hand and followed them out of the room. Cruella and Ursula were talking and Hook walked a little in front of them. He discreetly poured his coffee onto the floor to make it look like an accident. Cruella wasn't looking at the floor and slipped on the coffee.

'Ahh! Ursula!' Cruella shouted as slid down the hallway. Ursula tried to catch up to her without slipping on the coffee but she wasn't quick enough. Cruella eventually came to a stop as she hit smack bang into the wall and fell to the floor. Ursula caught up with her and helped her stand. Cruella wiped her front down but she noticed that her coat had coffee on it. She turned around to see Hook not far behind them, arms crossed over his chest smiling smugly.

'Now that's what I call payback.' Hook commented.

'Right that's it. I've had enough.' Cruella snapped. Cruella ran towards Hook and tackled him to the ground. They started fighting and Ursula had finally had enough. They need to put their plan into action. Why couldn't they just co-operate for once? While they were fighting Ursula walked back into the lounge and opened the cupboard that was in the corner of the room. She took out a pair of manacles that she had hid their in case of desperate times. If Hook and Cruella wouldn't co-operate willing then they would have to by force. She left the lounge and walked over to the two fighting villains. She quickly grabbed Cruella's arm with one tentacle and fastened one manacle around her wrist and fastened the other one around Hook's wrist. The pair stopped their fighting when they realised what had happened.

'What is this?' Cruella and Hook yelled in unison.

'Please tell me I'm dreaming this.' Cruella thought, worryingly. It was bad enough that they she was always arguing with him but to be chained to him was an absolute nightmare.

'What on earth do ya think you're playing at woman?' Hook exclaimed. Ursula glared at him and put her hands on her hips.

'Well you two can't and won't get along so I had no choice but to chain you together.' Ursula told them in a calm voice.

'Darling please release us. This is torture.' Cruella pleaded.

'And I don't like it anymore than she does.' Hook put in. Surely Ursula wasn't going to keep them like this...was she?

'Until you two co-operate willingly you will stay together.' Ursula explained. Cruella and Hook froze in shock. They would never be free. After their moment of quietness Cruella turned to Hook.

'You see what you've done you idiot!' she shouted.

'Me? I beg to differ!' Hook shouted back. They both stood up and dusted themselves off, with some difficulty. How were they ever going to get used to this?

'Now then. You two will convince Hades that Maleficent isn't the one for him and I will convince Grimhilde that Jafar isn't the one for her. We will meet in the lounge after.' Ursula informed them and walked off to Grimhilde's room, leaving behind an angry Hook and Cruella.

'Oh this is just splendid.' Hook drawled sarcastically.

'Oh will you shut up! You're giving me a headache.' Cruella snarled.

'Good. Some peace and quiet for a while.' Hook remarked.

'Why you...when I get out of these chains I will never work with you ever again!

'Likewise!'

Cruella resisted the urge to smack him across the face. 'However daaarling...she sounded in a voice laced with venom...considering we won't be free anytime soon I suppose I will co-operate with you till then. What do you say Hook?'

'Hmmp. I suppose I will too.' He forced a smile on his face and Cruella managed to smile back. Things were looking up.

'Now that that's settled lets go to Hades room.' Cruella said and started to walk but Hook pulled her back.

'Hold on a minute. I'm going to make another cup of coffee before we talk to him considering I did drink my last one.' Hook stated.

'We haven't got time for that you idiot.'

'But I haven't had one yet.'

'Well if you hadn't have give it to the floor you would have had it.'

'It was your fault I didn't have it.'

'What? How dare you!'

'You had to throw your tea in my face so I had to use my coffee as payback!'

'You shouldn't have insulted me you incompetent fool!'

'You shouldn't have pushed me yesterday you blundering imbecile!'

'No wonder we're not getting anywhere with our plans. You keep annoying me and coming up with stupid, idiotic ones!'

'You're always annoying me! I say we are going back to the lounge and then to Hades.' Hook shouted and yanked the chains.

'Oh no we're not. We're going to Hades first!' Cruella shouted back and yanked the chains.

'Never! To the lounge!' Hook yelled and yanked the chains again.

'In your dreams to Hades!' Cruella yelled and yanked the chains again.

'Lounge!'

'Hades!'

'Lounge!'

'Hades!'

Suddenly Hades appeared out of nowhere in a puff of smoke. Cruella and Hook quickly hid their chained hands behind their backs. So much for going to his room...

'Whoa, whoa, who keeps calling ma name?' he asked. Cruella and Hook smiled nervously.

'Why no-one darling.' Cruella said, innocently. Hades raised an eyebrow, unconvinced.

'Yeah...right. So what's the problem? Wait lemmie guess Hooky givin ya problems again?' he smirked. All the villains knew that they never got along and it always amused Hades to see them argue. However he now noticed how close they were to each other and he ran a hand through his hair and stared at them in confusion.

'What is with the closeness? Shouldn't you guys be bickering, arguing, tormenting each other yadda, yadda, yadda?' He asked. Cruella and Hook tried to come up with a good reason for this. They didn't want to explain the whole scenario to him. It was too embarrassing. There just had to be another way to explain this. Cruella thought of an idea and she dreaded the thought of saying it but there seemed to be no other logical explanation for this.

'We're...dating actually.' Cruella told him.

'What? We certainly are...she covered his mouth before he could say another word. Hook tried to finish his sentence but his words came out muffled.

'Hook daaarling. We don't have to hide it anymore.' She leaned and pressed her lips to his ear.

'Just go along with this you moron. There's no other way to explain this.' She whispered and removed her hand from his mouth.

'I hate you.'

'Likewise.'

Hades smirk widened at this. 'So how long have ya been dating for?' he asked. He didn't believe their lie for a second. Something was going on and he was going to find out what it was.

'Let me think...hmmm...how long has it been my handsome captain?' Cruella asked, smiling at him.

Hook did his best not to glare at her and sighed inwardly. He was never going to live this down.

'Er...two months my dear.' He answered and smiled back at her.

'When I'm with him time just seems to fly by you see darling.' Cruella explained to Hades. She tried to put her arm on Hook's shoulder but the chains restricted her. Hades raised an eyebrow at what she was trying to do. He disappeared and reappeared behind them. He laughed when he saw the chains.

'Makin sure she doesn't get away huh? It must be serious' He commented. Cruella and Hook turned around and faced Hades.

'Yes it is serious.' Cruella told him. Hades decided that he would have some fun and see how long they could keep up this charade of theirs.

'When's the wedding then eh?' he asked, raising both his eyebrows at them and crossing his arms over his chest.

'Well...it's...we...er…' Cruella stammered.

'Hey Hooky I'm surprised that ya haven't givin her a kiss yet. Ain't she ya girlfriend?' Hades questioned. Hook gulped and shuddered inwardly at the thought of doing such a thing.

He slowly leaned into Cruella and she closed her eyes, trying not to scrunch up her face in disgust. Hades struggled to keep himself from laughing. Their faces were just so hilarious. He was wondering if they would actually go through with it to keep up their lie. Cruella leaned into Hook but he quickly pulled away before his lips could touch hers turned his head away. Hades bent over laughing. He couldn't believe that they had been so close to kissing each other.

'Yuuuck. That's disgusting. I won't degrade myself to doing that.'

'Nor will I. I would rather kiss Jasper or Horace than kiss you.'

Cruella faced Hades. 'You knew didn't you daaarling?' She hissed. Hades smirked in amusement at her angry face.

'Come on babe. Did ya really think ya could fool the lord of the dead? There's more chance of me defeatin Jerkules than there is of you two gettin together. So what happened to you two huh?'

Cruella sighed and put her hand over her eyes. 'Ursula chained us together and will only free us if we willingly co-operate together.'

'Hmmm...well that's unlucky for ya guys.'

'Would you free us darling? My wrist is starting to ache, I need a cigarette and I hate being chained to this man!'

'My wrist aches as well and I hate being chained to this woman!'

'Eh why not but don't tell Urs that it was me that freed ya got that?' Hades told them. Cruella and Hook nodded in response and Hades zapped their chains. As soon as the chains melted and they moved far away from one another, avoiding eye contact. Once they meet Ursula in the lounge they would have to come up with a believable explanation for why they were free.

'While you're here darling we have to talk to you.' Cruella informed Hades.

Hope you all enjoyed this chapter.