Yay! Another difficult fic done! I can't believe how easy these 'hard' ones are turning out to be! It's amazing! I've done my second ever Varia fic and frankly, I think it's a stroke of genius. I hope I haven't disappointed those of you that were counting on this story. Three more to go! Who's as excited as me? Let me know what you think? Many thanks and enjoy!
DISCLAIMER: I do not own KHR nor do I claim any rights to it or any of the characters in this fan fiction story. I only own the plot and nothing else.
Being the only female in the Varia was annoying. You were literally the only female in the entire castle! You had no privacy whatsoever and you had to put up with a lot of dirt, grime and generally disgusting stuff that would make any other girl squirm and run out of there screaming her head off.
You had dealt with the cuts, bruises and scrapes. There were quite a number that were especially serious and, being the best doctor that money could afford, of course you would go with the most brutal Mafia gang around of your own accord, right? Wrong. You were there to clear the debt you owed the leader, Xanxus, That you were a good doctor was simply a bonus and you had to work for the Varia for ten years to be free.
The Tenth Vongola heir knew about it but either he didn't bother the Varia that much or he was intimidated into silence, the latter being the likely case. You sighed as you checked the bandages on Belphegor for the third time. He had gotten pretty beaten up but paired with Lussuria's Sun Flames, of course he was getting better faster and would be able to get back into action in two weeks give or take a few days. You gave him his ointment and left the room heading for your own.
Xanxus wouldn't let him stay too long in the infirmary though. He didn't believe in resting to allow a would to heal. What was up with that? He could be rather stubborn and you had learned that in your first year of working with him. He wouldn't even let serious wounds be dealt with and really, you never bothered with him anyway. If his wounds festered and he died of an infection, it would really be better for you...
But really, the laws of medicine as you were taught them, applied to anyone. As long as someone needed help, it was a doctor's duty to tend to them. Still, there was nothing against imagining the various ways to kill that bastard. He could be so pig-headed sometimes! Then you heard a commotion at the door. You hoped it wasn't what you thought it was. You really didn't need this this late at night. It was the holidays after all so it wouldn't be unwarranted really. Xanxus didn't let you go home for any reason, so of course your mother would miss her eldest baby.
Your mother had come twice or thrice to the castle and demanded, yes, demanded to see you. Nobody ever demanded anything of Xanxus unless they were either demented or too strong to care. Your mother was neither, but it was your father's fault you were indebted to the Mafia to begin with and he had left home a long time ago, too long for you to even remember what he looked like. All the times she had come, she had been turned away. After that last time, he had come into your room to warn you. You had glared at him defiantly and he had looked like he was seriously considering crushing your neck.
"Consider yourself lucky," he had said, or rather growled. He punched a hole in the wall beside your head for good measure. You took a deep breath and clutched the collar of your top. He scared you for sure. The very first time you met him was the scariest day of your life. It was unnerving how much he unsettled you. You weren't alone in that. He scared everyone, the Varia members included, in some situations.
Luckily, it wasn't your mother, just Fran and Squalo having it out. Mammon was around somewhere, probably just waiting for you to mess up or biding his time so he could scare you for the millionth time that week. It got really old after the tenth time and after the twentieth time, you had stopped keeping count. To the Varia, you were just another plaything. Either you were getting yelled at or you were the centre of all their jokes.
You sighed and sat back in the arm chair in your room with a sigh. You needed a break from the Varia, for good! You scratched your scalp freeing your (h/c) hair of its band and leaned back cursing your dead-beat dad for the billionth time that week. God only knew how that bastard had died, but you were sure he was dead. The reports had come back and your mother had gone alone to confirm it. She wouldn't let you see what he looked like and you weren't really so bothered.
At least you were getting some pay since half of it went towards buying your family's freedom. You opened your weary eyes as your door slammed open. That was another thing you hated. There was no privacy whatsoever in this castle. You had to either put up with it and simply show yourself in various versions of nakedness so the guys would blush and apologise (this would never happen except maybe, stress on maybe, with Squalo) or find a way to keep yourself hidden while you changed.
The bathroom worked best for this because at least you were allowed to keep that key. Your bedroom key had been taken from you since Xanxus didn't trust you further than he could throw you, which was pretty far if you thought about it. Back to the intruder at hand.
"VOOOI! (NAME), THE BOSS WANTS YOU AT THE TABLE TONIGHT AND HE SAYS NO ARGUMENTS! WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN THAT CHAIR? AREN'T YOU MEANT TO BE LOOKING OVER THE PATIENTS IN THE INFIRMARY?" he asked. You rubbed your sore neck and leaned forward with some difficulty. Every one of your muscles was screaming bloody murder and you were sure you would collapse from fatigue. On top of all that, you now had a headache from the very vocal Rain Guardian of the Varia. You found it a bit ironic that he was the tranquillising factor of the Varia.
"I already looked over the patients, unless more have come in. I already heard about dinner, but thanks for reminding me. You can tell Xanxus I'll be there," you said with a smile.
"Voi, you don't look so good. Wh... what's wrong with you? You look pale... (Name)!"
That was the last thing you heard before you passed out. You weren't sure how long you were out for, but when you woke up, you were in your bed with Xanxus' bright red eyes glaring down at you. You sighed and shut your eyes again hoping this was all a bad dream, praying with all your heart that it was.
"Get up trash," came his angry voice from above you. It was no dream. You sighed again and moved to get up, your bones all protesting with all they had. You winced and settled finally on your pillow then looked up at him.
"What happened to you?" he asked, his arms crossed, his eyes fixed on you. You looked down. Really, you guessed it was the fatigue and the strain of being the only medical help in the entire castle besides Lussuria who was mostly out on a mission or something and bringing you the worst cases, like Bel. You just remembered that you had been taking care of him.
"Have you gone dumb as well? Answer me!" he said his face taking on a very subtle hard edge. You were thankful for that small psychology lesson from the doctor you had been under as an apprentice and thus taken over from.
"I don't know. I would say it's fatigue," you said raising your hand to your forehead. You didn't feel feverish, but it hurt like the devil and you really were in no mood to deal with your temperamental temporary boss.
"You missed dinner," he said and turned away, "don't expect any food until breakfast." You sighed when he finally left. Those red eyes had haunted your sleep for very many nights. You crawled back under the covers and pulled them up to your neck. All you really wanted was to rest. You were sure you would be fine for breakfast. It didn't seem like you had been out that long. You shut your eyes and promptly fell asleep.
The next morning, it was Lussuria waking you up dressed in a rather fashionable pair of pants and a shirt although the ridiculous pink apron with the frills spoilt the entire look. You smiled fondly though. Of all the Varia, you liked Lussuria and Fran the best; Lussy-chan (he preferred that) because you had a lot in common and he looked after you in times like this and Fran because aside from his very frank, very annoying side, he was quite nice. You didn't like Xanxus at all, the proud goat.
"Good Morning (Name)-chan!" he said coming in with a breakfast tray, "I have brought you some of this fabulous breakfast. I know boss is angry with you because you got so sick, but I keep telling you he shouldn't make you work so hard, hmm?" He set the tray down and faced you with his hands on his hips. He headed for your drawer as you sat up and propped up some pillows behind you.
"You shouldn't do that (Name)-chan! That's why your Lussy-chan is here to help you!" He grabbed the pillows from you and plumped them before putting them behind you and making sure you were comfortable. "That's nice, nee?" he said and smiled brightly before getting the tray.
"This is a nice healthy breakfast for you since you are so weak. Have you even been eating at all? Oh darling, you are skin and bone, you have to eat more, hmm? Here, have a scone. I made it myself!" You sighed and watched him rush about your room opening the curtains and talking a mile a minute. He was always like this and you loved it. He fussed over you like a mother hen over her chicks... like your mother used to when you were younger.
"Now, make sure you eat that and drink all your porridge. The tea will get cold if you let it stay. It's herbal so it will clear up your system and you'll be good as new in no time. But if you still don't feel so good, I can get out my box-animal to make you feel all better," he said sitting on your bed beside you.
"Thank you Lussy-chan," you said and sipped your porridge. It was pretty good. You had to hand it to him, when Lussuria decided to cook, he went all out. You put down your empty bowl and looked at his smiling face, your own expression falling a little.
"What's wrong now, do you feel worse?" he asked already getting out his ring. You shook your head and gave a weak smile as a rebellious tear rolled down your cheek. The truth was, you missed your family. You missed your mother and the way she would smile proudly at you. You missed your younger brother and his tricks and mischief. You missed your sister and her constant fussing over the little things.
"I... I just wish he would let me go home. I just want to see them again. I mean, I know I have a debt to repay, but I wouldn't mind doing it for the rest of my life if I could get to see my family every now and again..." you wiped the single streak on your face and sighed with a slightly brighter smile. Lussuria patted your shoulder and smiled.
"Well, maybe boss will have a change of heart. He likes you, you know," he said getting up and handling the dishes on the tray beside your table. You looked at him shocked, your cup held in place halfway to your lips. What had he just said?
"You know, I think you need to change the curtains in this room. They are rather bland, aren't they? You need a little more yellow, or maybe red. Brown doesn't do anything for you at all,"he said, hands on his hips.
"I'm sorry what was that?" you asked putting your cup down and away from you afraid you would drop it if you didn't.
"I said brown doesn't do anything for you. Why do you think I haven't bought you anything brown before?"
"No, no, the other thing... He likes me?"
"Yes, he likes you. How many times have you seen him throw a tantrum over one of us being sick? You do remember the food poisoning you got last year, don't you? The cook was fired within the hour of you getting sick. Who do you think asked me to take care of you, hmm?" he said pinching your cheek and getting up.
"I have to go now, but you had better finish all that tea. I'll send someone up for the dishes later. You stay healthy now, eh? See you (Name)-chan!" he said with one last wave then he was out the door. What a morning! Xanxus liked you? That in itself was amazing! He did have an awfully funny way of showing it though, but you were a little sceptical. Xanxus was never nice an you could bet anything that he was never nice to anyone.
Maybe Lussuria was wrong. No, he was definitely wrong. Xanxus didn't like you. He didn't like anyone. He was incapable of feeling. With that thought safely settled in your mind, you finished your breakfast and went to sleep. By the time you woke up, you would be good as new and ready for the gruelling time ahead of you.
*.*.*.*.*.*.*
Your work shift had changed and there was a new nurse in the infirmary when you finally got there. There was a much lighter load, you found. You couldn't understand it, but you were grateful that Xanxus had noticed. You supposed you should go and see him about it. You had to tend to the newest patients though so you would do that first. It was the holidays and you wished you could see your family, but that was enough. At least you didn't have to work yourself to the bone any more and the new nurse was very helpful.
Some time after the nurse had left, you sat down to finish up a report and an inventory of the drugs you needed. You felt much better so you could do this without as many complaints as you had before. You didn't mind this change one little bit.
"You're still here. Weren't you meant to be resting? I thought your shift was changed," came a deep voice from the doorway. You nearly jumped a mile when you looked up and saw who it was. Xanxus stood there leaning against the door frame and watched you. Your paleness gradually faded and you stood and smiled.
"It was changed, but I still have a report to write. I just have to finish that and I'll be out of here. Is... is there something I can help you with?" you asked with your most sincere smile yet. In spite of yourself, Lussuria's words had affected you and for some unnamed reason, you couldn't stop smiling. He took out his arm from under his coat and held it out to you. You saw a large gash there.
On impulse, you reached for the medical kit and went to work immediately you had him seated. It was pretty bad.
You supposed Lussuria was out on a mission if he was coming to you for something like this. You weren't even sure you needed to know what had cut his arm that badly. You cleaned up his wound and bandaged it, all the while working in silence. You put away the equipment when you were done and went to the sink to wash your hands. You hadn't noticed him watching you. When you went to work on a patient, you gave it your all, so obviously you wouldn't notice.
You hadn't even noticed that you had pulled him into the room and made him sit. That was something you would never do and something he probably would never allow you to do. He had watched you carefully dab around the wound and ignored the pain altogether when you had cleaned the wound directly. The bandages at least stopped the bleeding and would keep it clean until Lussuria could come back.
That was the reason that when you looked up, you were surprised to find Xanxus' gaze fixed on you. Before you could blink, Xanxus' hand was behind your head and holding you in place as he crushed his lips onto yours. His other arm, the one you had just bandaged, went to your side and his hand rested on your hip.
You couldn't help that your eyes fluttered closed under his brutal ministrations. Bruised as you knew your lips would be, you didn't want it to stop. His tongue invaded your mouth and your head swam. You clutched at his shirt and gave a little moan. He groaned and kissed a flaming path down your cheek to your neck where he bit you. You cried out, your hands now on his shoulders having crawled up his chest at some point. You couldn't believe what was happening.
"You taste good, trash," you heard him murmur huskily near your ear. You shivered marvelling at the fact that you could like that voice. You sighed as he licked the mark that was probably there. You didn't mind it. Lussuria would wonder what had happened to you there, but you didn't really feel like worrying about that.
"You're mine now, you understand?" he said with a tiny squeeze at your waist. He smirked when you nodded and turned to head for the door.
"You can go and see your family tomorrow, but you had better come back or I'll come for you myself." Without a backward glance, he left the room. You looked at your reflection in the mirror above the sink and smiled. Your skin was flushed and there was a tell-tale mark on your neck. You smirked and covered it with your hand. You would be hard-pressed explaining that to your mum, but you were going home! So Lussuria had been right. Xanxus didn't have a good side as you had originally thought though. He just had another bad side, and you liked it.