You can hit restart

But you cannot overwrite this save


Leonard was always a grumpy person, perhaps just seemingly unhappy all the time. It was Jim's first impression of him. This paranoid guy who just wanted to sit in the bathroom and got told off by a women half his height. Everyone knew of grumpy McCoy, from the Academy to the Enterprise.

That wasn't the McCoy Jim was looking at now.

What he was looking at, this was pure anger.

It was hatred and rage.

And it frightened Jim.

Another loud crash echoed through the hall of the hospital.

Jim flinched as the drawer slammed against the wall just inches from his face.

Glass and medical supplies littered the floor of Leonard's room.

"We should call the authorities," a young nurse said. This was obviously the first time she had seen a patient lash out violently.

"No," Pike said, "Captain Kirk will handle things."

"But, Admiral, the longer we wait the more dangerous it could ge-"

"Only Kirk could reach his husband now."

The young nurse still felt unsure about this, but turned back to the scene before her.

"You're protecting her!" Leonard shouted, his through raw from the days of silence. Jim could see the fatigue laced through his body, standing on shaking legs, only the adrenaline kept Leonard upright.

"Starfleet has her in custody and is interrogating her as we speak, along with the others we got in custody. There's nothing we can doing anymore, we have to leave it to them. We're going to find out everything," Jim said in a calm voice despite being shaken to the core.

"I don't care!" Another drawer was sent flying and crashed against a wall; the clatter of hypos filled the air.

"You don't…care?"

"Knowing anything about that place won't make a difference! I was a fucking lab rat, it happened; knowing any other information won't change any of that for me! She killed our child Jim! Our child!"

"I know, Bones, I know."

Jim didn't know. He hadn't even known Bones was pregnant. He really didn't even know if this was true or if it was something…made up in Leonard's head. He knew he had to be careful with his words and actions; he took slow steps forward, the glass sharp against his bare feet.

A sudden change in the atmosphere made Jim stop short and he noticed the blank look on Leonard's face.

"You need to know, don't you?" Leonard's voice was hoarse and Jim was barely able to hear him.

"Bones…"

"I'm dirty and used. Tainted and bruised. You need to know what stained scraps you're getting handed back."

Jim was losing focus. How could Leonard ever think that? Jim had to take a moment and breath and remember that Leonard isn't in his right mind. As harsh as that may sound it's true.

"I will always love you," he reached into his pocket. "Remember?"

Jim held up a silver ring.

He could see something click for Leonard, something register. He took a few more slow steps until he was standing right against his husband.

"Remember where it all began?" Jim took Leonard's left hand and slipped the ring on, just like he had done the day they proposed to each other.

"I'm broken, Jim."

"No, a little cracked, maybe," Jim lifted Leonard's head so the man was looking him in the eyes. "But I'm here and I'm going to mend you."

"There'll be scars."

"Everyone has scars. You saved me, now it's my turn to save you."

Tears formed and fell from Leonard's eyes and he leaned his body into Jim's, dragging them both down to the ground. After a few minutes the medical team finally moved in to do their part.

After Leonard was settled into a new room and fast asleep (thanks to sedatives) Jim went to the roof of the hospital. He just needed some fresh air to help calm his nerves and settle his own mind. He looked out upon the night sky and the lights shining off the city. It was a beautiful site in this chapter of turmoil his life was currently going through.

He didn't know what was going to happen from this point onwards. What would happen to him and Leonard concerning the Enterprise.

Whatever happened he'd take the path with his husband, even if that meant giving up his beloved ship and space travel.

Leonard meant more to him than any of those things.

"Captain?"

Jim turned to the call of his title and smiled a tired smile.

"What can I do for you Lieutenant?"

Uhura walked up beside Jim and looked out at the skyline. "Wanted to see how things were," she turned to him. "How you were."

There was no use lying to his communication officer.

"I'm tired. Upset and terrified."

She nodded.

"But hopeful."

"Things might not be able to go to how they were but that doesn't mean they can't get better," she said.

"Yeah and don't think I've forgotten about you. Or the crew."

"Captain?"

"I know it's been all about me and Bones, but I know my crew went through a lot. I'm going to fix everything. I'm going to make everything better."

Uhura saw the determination through the weary look on his face and smiled.

"Just know you're not alone with that task, Jim."

He smiled back at her.

"Keiuuk."

Jim and Spock looked up from the PADD they were mulling over. Leonard sat by the window staring out at the busy skyline.

"What's that?" Jim asked.

"A planet," he looked down at his bandaged arm. "At least…what I thought was a planet."

He went silent after that.

Jim and Spock looked at each other.

A few minutes later after Spock left, he perked up again.

"I want to go home."

Jim didn't look up from the PADD. "You haven't been cleared yet."

"I'm fine."

"Mmmm."

"I'm sick of being in a fucking bed!"

Jim looked up.

"Well, right now you're in a chair."

"Fuck you."

Jim looked back down at his PADD. Jim didn't take of it personal. Leonard's been having these bouts of anger towards anyone and everyone. Yelling at doctors and nurses who would touch him just a bit too long, at Spock who just spoke as he always did in that tone of his and at Jim whenever no one else was around. Jim figured it was better than a silent drugged up heap in a bed (which he was for a few days after his outburst). He needed to see Leonard alive and moving.

"Which home?" Jim asked after fiddling with the PADD for a few minutes.

"Enterprise."

Jim nodded and stood up, handing the PADD to Leonard.

"Look over them carefully."

"What's this?"

"The only way you'll ever get cleared to serve on the Enterprise again."