Disclaimer: Trigun is not mine. This story is outright horrible abuse of the characters, and I apologize. Just remember I'm the sick one, and Yasuhiro Nightow is the king.

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ARACHNOPHOBIA

pathological fear or loathing of spiders

Chapter 10: Closer

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Completely tantalized, Knives touched the corner of his left eye. He then brought his fingers to his lips and tasted the bittersweet moisture. Tears? It could not be. He wasn't supposed to cry. He wasn't supposed to know how to cry. Not anymore...

"What did you do to me, Vash? What did you do?"

"What are you talking about?"

"S-something's broken." Knives stammered. "Inside of me. I can feel it... it hurts."

Vash actually smirked. "It's your heart, no? Imagine that. I never knew you still had yours."

Looking wild, Knives only waited five seconds before he roughly pushed his brother aside and ran out of the room.

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Vash stood there in the hotel room, staring at the empty spot where his brother had only moments ago been. Then he realised what had just happened, and the glass of thomas milk he'd been holding fell down on the floor.

"Shit."

Vash kicked the door open so hard that it nearly fell out of its hinges as he rushed after his brother.

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Luckily, Vash didn't have to run very long before he spotted his brother's limping figure in the waning lamplight at the end of the road. Vash was slightly surprised he'd gotten even that far, seeing as he could hardly walk without assistance. Shaking his head and sighing with relief, Vash began to jog towards his twin. What an idiot! Knives didn't even have his jacket and boots on. He would freeze to death unless Vash could get him back to their room and quickly. And now that he really thought about it, he noticed that he, too, was only in his pyjamas.

Vash gained his brother, grabbed him from the shoulders and turned him forcefully around. "Where the fuck do you think you're going?"

Knives was breathing rapidly, his shoulders shaking with the effort of walking and holding back his tears. "Where do you think I am going, stupid? As far away from you as possible!"

"Don't be ridiculous, Knives!" Vash shook his twin quite harshly. "You're not going anywhere. Come on, let me take you back to our room."

Knives slapped him. And slapped him again.

Vash grimaced, but didn't ease his grip on his twin –only held him tighter so that Knives couldn't move his hands, anymore. "Happy now?"

"No!" Knives glared at him with venom. "If you think for one second that you can treat me like this... treat me like he did you're sorely mistaken. I'll die before I let you imprison me. I'll..."

Vash slapped him back. "Shut the fuck up and take a breath, will you? Fuck!"

Knives did shut up, although he was silently growling with anger like a rabid dog.

"Listen..." Vash didn't quite know what to say, but he tried, anyway. "What I said was horrible and I didn't mean it. I just... I mean... Whatever I say or do, you never listen! You never learn! I yell at you, and you yell back. I hit you, and you hit back. If I threaten to kill you, you just laugh at my face. You always underestimate me, always mock me. That's why..."

Vash swallowed. He was embarrassed to find out that he, too, had started to feel the familiar moisture gathering in the corners of his eyes.

"I just wanted to threaten you with something you might actually think I was capable of doing, Knives. I just wanted you to know... that I really could be dangerous."

Knives watched him, a look of careful contemplation in his eyes. Their eyes met, and Vash felt suddenly very weak in the knees. For the first time since their childhood, Knives was looking at him without hostility, without disappointment. In fact, Vash could almost detect some kind of deep affection in those deep blue eyes. Some kind of strong, primitive connection between them...

And then Knives kicked him hard in the stomach.

Vash doubled with pain and released his grip. Knives kicked him again before punching him straight to the nose. Vash tasted blood in his mouth as he staggered backwards and glared at his twin.

Knives was looking at him with barely concealed disgust, massaging his fist. "You stay the fuck away from me, Vash."

Vash spat out the blood that had gathered in his mouth. "You wish."

Knives tilted his head and narrowed his eyes that looked almost golden in the wavering light of the crackly old street lamp. He really looked rather breath-taking, in Vash's opinion. "I won't let you conquer me."

"That's all right." Vash smiled, blood trickling down his jaw. "I never asked for your permission, anyway."

The next moment, Vash bounced his brother and pushed him down on the ground. It wasn't exactly a difficult thing to do since Knives still was half invalid, even though Knives himself had obviously momentarily forgotten this fact in his blinding rage. Easily and swiftly, Vash settled down on his brother's hips and grabbed his pale blond hair in his strong, prosthetic hand. He twisted and pulled back, and Knives moaned with pain.

"You bring this upon yourself, you do realise that, don't you?" Vash leaned forwards so that his face was very close to his brother's. "You'd better accept the fact that you're completely under my mercy now. There's no-one else on this godforsaken planet who would take care of you. And say what you say... we both know that you do need to be taken care of. We both know... that you need me."

Knives' chest was rapidly rising and falling beneath him, and Vash smirked as he realised that Knives was, in fact, turned on by all this activity. Could it be possible that Knives hadn't been faking at all? Was there something real hidden behind all his artificial flirting? Vash was both shocked and exhilarated by this revelation, and wanted to find out exactly how genuine Knives' reactions to his advances were.

Still pulling at his brother's tangled hair, Vash began to fondle his neck and jawline with his other hand. The skin felt hot in the coldness of the night, and so very soft. Knives was immovable underneath him, and only his ragged breathing proved him to be still alive. Quickly, Vash lowered his lips to his brother's ear and whispered. "Well? Am I right? Do you need me?"

Knives didn't answer. Vash smirked before he gently bit his brother's earlobe. Knives tensed completely underneath him and loudly gasped for air. Satisfied, Vash nibbled his way down to his brother's neck and finally kissed him right under the chin. Then he let his mouth hover a few seconds above his brother's slightly parted lips, and just when Knives was about to close the distance between them, he pulled back.

"I guess this means you're not going to give me any more trouble tonight, right?"

Knives didn't reply, but only stared at the nearby lamp post, eyes gleaming with tears of mortification.

Vash tousled his hair and smirked. "Good boy."

The coldness seeped through every fiber of his being like fast plague. In vain, he tried to control the wanton shivers that continuously ran through his aching body. Pearls of cold sweat formed on his forehead as he tried to endure the dull pain that had suddenly began to throb in his every muscle.

He felt sick.

The pillow felt rough under his cheek and the blanket felt heavy. The faint daylight that was seeping through the ugly curtains hurt his swollen eyes, but he still couldn't close them. He couldn't take his gaze off his brother, his beautiful brother, who was sleeping right next to him with a touch of smile on his serene lips.

It was two hours after his little adventure with Vash, and they were both back in their hotel room. Vash was sound asleep, but Knives couldn't relax. What exactly had happened tonight? Knives huddled into a tight ball and tried to figure that out.

This entire situation was macabre. Completely twisted and deformed. Knives didn't know what was happening, and that frightened him. He was used to being in control at all times, and this role of a well-treated puppy didn't quite suit him. He wasn't good at following or taking orders, he was the one to give them. However, he knew he couldn't resist his brother. Not now. Not in his current condition –both mental and physical. Knives was utterly confused, and things just kept on becoming more confusing. Did he even want to resist his brother, anymore? He was horrified to find out there was actually a little voice in his heart that told him that things could be much better if only he'd let Vash take care of him. Take care of them both.

All of a sudden, Knives' mind was filled with memories of their distant past. Bitter night surrounded him, and he felt a small seed of panic settle in his heart. He was two years old again, feeling powerful and young. He was resting in the shadow of a tall rock, pretending to be asleep. And he heard those voices in the darkness again; the sounds of Vash picking up a heavy rock and breathing rapidly just behind him.

On guard, body entirely tensed, Knives once more prepared for what he knew would soon happen. He waited, and he waited... and then he heard the rock fall. On the ground. Not even near his head. Running footsteps, accompanied by painful sobs, indicated to Knives that Vash had gone. That good-for-nothing, weepy-faced kid! Honestly!

Knives opened his eyes he'd not even realised he'd shut. The memory was rapidly fading.

Who exactly was the good-for-nothing, weepy-faced kid, now? With insecure fingers, Knives touched his own cheek. It was damp; whether from feverish sweat or silent tears, he didn't know anymore. Maybe from both. The shivers of the fever engulfed him, and he felt the reality slip away. Nightmares tortured him, one after another, and he just couldn't stop silently crying in his long, restless sleep.

When he woke up several hours after, he felt his brother's cold hand resting on his forehead.

"Shit, Knives! You're outright burning!"

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To Be Continued

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A/N: I'm sorry it took me this long to update this chapter. I've been very busy and the chapter was very difficult. Please visit/friend my Livejournal if you're interested to know how I'm proceeding with this story. There you can find my poor excuses as to why I'm not updating, as well as some other ramblings you might as well want to skip. Anyway, the LJ is under the username 'angryon' if you'd like to check it out.

-Lances