"You swore in front of those kids?" Clark asked Lois.

"I didn't swear so much as—okay I swore, but it's nothing they won't hear on TV. How did you find out about that anyway?"

"Ms. Kenney doesn't trust you with notes anymore," he tried to stay sternly, but he couldn't keep the amusement out of his voice. "She also said something about a guidance counselor. Care to explain that?"

"Oh, kiss my—"

"Careful, Lois. You better get out of the habit of that before you get in more trouble. What are you going to do when we have kids?"

"They will have a wide vocabulary."

He shook his head. "You know my parents were in perfect agreement about teaching me not to cuss. We're not going to be in agreement on this one, are we?"

She shrugged, "If you want to teach our kids to have clean speech, I don't mind. Just don't expect their mother to follow suit."

---

"Mom's sick," Clark told Lois the following morning.

"Is she okay?" Lois asked, worriedly.

"She'll be fine, but there's no school today because of parent-teacher conferences. Who are we going to get to watch you?"

"I guess you have no choice but to leave me here. There's no way I'm going to let you call a babysitter."

"But what about—" Clark began, but he was interrupted by knocking on the door. Clark used his x-ray vision to see who it was. "And speaking of the devil."

"I couldn't help but notice that Lois isn't in school," Ms. Lambert said to Clark when he opened the door, without so much as a hello.

"Of course, you couldn't. You watch me leave every morning through your blinds," Lois retorted.

"Delightful child," Ms. Lambert told her smilingly, but it was obvious she wasn't that amused that Lois knew she spied through her blinds.

"Not that it's any of your business, but I have the day off," Lois told her.

Ms. Lambert turned her attention back to Clark. "You weren't thinking of leaving this little girl home alone, were you?"

Clark got a strange look in his eyes and Lois knew he was thinking of letting Ms. Lambert watch her.

"Of course not," Lois said. "Daddy's taking me to work."

Clark's eyes widened. As soon as the satisfied Ms. Lambert was gone, Clark asked, "Are you out of your mind?"

She shrugged, "It's not like any of them knew me as a child. Just give me an alias for work. We can say that I'm a cousin of Lois and call me…Anne."

"Anne?" he said, raising his eyebrows. "I don't know."

"It would explain any resemblance they spot."

"What would you do? It's not like you could chase down stories."

"I'd find a way to keep myself amused."

"That's what I'm afraid of." He gave a deep sigh. "I suppose it might work out."

---

"Where in the world is Lane!" Perry yelled when he saw Clark.

Lois stepped out from behind Clark.

"Who is this?" he asked, looking at her as if he knew he should recognize her but didn't.

"This is Anne," Clark answered, hoping he sounded normal and convincing. Lying was pretty much an everyday activity for him, but it had never become easy. "Lois' little cousin. She's staying with us for a little while and I thought I would show her where we work."

"Where is Lois?"

"Still sick, chief. My mother has it now too. It's a nasty bug. It must be the flu."

"It's peculiar she hasn't tried to sneak back into work, sick or not. She really must be feeling poorly. I'll stop by on the way home and visit with her."

"Oh, she's not really up to that, sir, and you shouldn't risk catching it."

"I suppose you're right. I'll just send some flowers." He started to walk away much to Clark's relief, but then he turned back. "Oh, and I have a video game system in my office that I never use. My son gave it to me. He said that it would help me relieve stress, but all it has done is make me more stressed. I don't know how you're supposed to work those stupid controllers and the screen moves so fast, but young people seem to like it."

Lois followed him into the office. The small TV and game system was set up in the corner. Perry brought a chair over to her.

"If only I was getting paid for this," Lois said to herself, while the PS3 came on.

"What was that?" he asked.

"Nothing."

Lois played a Zelda game while Perry got down to work.

Johnson, the newbie, came in, "I have the piece on the Founder's Day celebration."

"Hmm," Perry commented after reading it.

"Is that a good hmm or a bad hmm?" Johnson asked nervously.

"It's passable. I was just thinking that I gave the same story to Lane when she first started working on this floor and she uncovered scams going on at the celebration. But I suppose it's unfair to compare. Lane has a talent for sniffing out dirt and intrigue, the best I've ever seen. Some reporters just see what's on the surface and that's okay. It won't win you a Pulitzer or a promotion, but it'll do. Oh, and your desk isn't far from Kent's. Have him read your articles before you bring them back. Lane might be the better reporter, but Kent is the better writer."

"Yes, sir. Thank you for the advice, sir," Johnson said, still sounding nervous and scurrying out in a hurry.

"Oh, and by the way," Perry said, getting Lois' attention. "Don't tell your cousin what you just heard."

"She won't hear it from me," Lois said with a smile.

Lois had just gained the ability to turn into a wolf on the game. She paused it and stood up.

"Where are you going?" Perry asked.

"To the ladies room."

"Oh, of course. Go ahead."

---

While Lois washed her hands, there were 2 women using the restroom as a gossip room. She pulled down a paper towel and wiped her hands, not paying it any attention until she heard her name. She slowed down the process of drying her hands so she could hear their conversation.

"Oh my gosh, she's such a floozy." Lois recognized her as a writer of the gossip column, Sherry something or other.

"I think she is just pretending she's sick when Clark's there and having an affair when he's at work. 'Cause face it, when else does she have the time? They're with each other all the time. It's hard to cheat on your husband if you work with him. There's no staying late at the office." This woman was Melody, who had a Dear Abby kind of column. She always seemed so nice. Lois was rather surprised.

"I didn't think about that, but you're right. You know Randy said he drove by their house yesterday and Lois didn't look sick to him and she was with a man."

She gasped, "Do you think Clark knows? I wonder who the man was. Superman?"

Sherry rolled her eyes, "Don't believe everything you read in the tabloids. As much as she throws herself at him, he's too good for her. No, it's probably the cable guy or—"

"That does it!" Lois said, tossing the paper towel into the trash. "Who do you two think you are?"

"Excuse me?" Sherry asked with raised eyebrows at the little girl.

"I happen to know Lois very well and you couldn't be further from the truth."

"Listen, honey—" Melody began.

"Don't honey me, you viper. I know now that nice act is a phony facade."

"I think someone needs a nap," Sherry said. "And who's supposed to be watching you?"

"I think you ladies are the ones who need a chaperone. Either you lack moral character or your own life is so humdrum, you need a little excitement. I've got news for you. This isn't As the Planet Turns. Save your gossip for the paper."

The two women walked out of the restroom, shaken and offended. Lois went after them. "Come back here. I'm not through with you yet. I still want to tell you where you and Randy can shove your juicy gossip." The women walked a little faster.

Clark quickly jumped up and went over to intervene. "Anne, can I talk to you in private for a minute?"

She didn't look happy that he had stopped her from pursuing her conversation further, but she followed him to the elevator.

After the doors closed, one of the men leaned over to his desk buddy. "You know what's creepy about that little girl?"

"She seems like an adult stuck in a child's body?" he supplied.

"No, that's not quite it," he said, still trying to come up with the answer himself.

"She's an exact copy of Lane?"

He snapped his fingers, "That's it."

"All I have to say is if the whole family's like that, that's not a family I want to meet."

TBC