Real note at the end, insert basic disclaimer here.

The days in Mississippi were dragging on. All plans for a fun-filled two weeks hanging with my little sister were being derailed, as I could barely summon the energy to get out of bed, never mind leave the house. My father and Melissa had neither noticed nor cared, too wrapped up in themselves to do much more than pass me an envelope with a hundred bucks in it as a Christmas present, and mumble a half-hearted thanks to the scarf and gloves I'd gotten them, respectively.

Today I'd made it to the basement, a first for this week, watching old movies and shoveling popcorn down my throat at a frankly alarming rate, while Cynthia looked on, concerned.

"You're going to tell me eventually, right?"

"Hm?" I paused to swallow the mouthful of popcorn I was chomping on. "What are you talking about?"

"You're depressed about something. I won't push, so long as you promise you'll tell me eventually, right?"

"I…" I shook my head. "I think the cookies are done, I'm going to get them out of the oven."

It was true, I was depressed. Over a boy. Which was pathetic. Which I knew. Which only made me more depressed.

I got dumped. Without having dated the guy first. How sad was that? And what was worse, I couldn't stop replaying that night in my head.

"I think you should stay in Mississippi."

"What?" I was sure I'd misheard I had not been expecting that.

The hurt that slammed into me when he said that must have bled into my voice, because he hastily continued, "Alice, I'm not trying to hurt your feelings. But things are dangerous here. You'd be better off."

"What are you talking about? This is Forks. There's nothing dangerous here."

"Things aren't always as they seem." His voice went flat, emotionless. "My family and I… We're different. And I need you to trust me when I say that it doesn't matter how, but it's not something you should be around. If you stay in Forks, things could get very bad."

"Are you threatening me?" I didn't ask accusatorially, but I was floored, trying to get my head around how things could have gotten so warped, when just a few minutes ago we were laughing over my milkshake.

"No," Jasper was speaking slowly and deliberately, as if each word was carefully chosen. "Alice, never. But there are larger forces at work here, things you couldn't even imagine, and I need you to trust me when I say that you are better off in Mississippi."

"You want me to leave." It was a statement, not a question, but I could see him working his jaw after I said it, like it caused him pain.

"If I were a better man, I would."

"Okay, what the hell does that mean?" I crossed my arms, leaning against the passenger door, putting as much distance between the two of us as possible.

"It's a catch twenty two," Jasper laughed, bitterly, a much changed man from the one I'd just had dinner with. "If I told you, if you knew the truth, you'd be running away as quickly as possible, there'd be no need for me to warn you away, but if you knew… You'd be that much more entangled, that much more at risk if anyone else knew, so I am begging, Alice, for your own sake, stay in Mississippi."

"I don't understand," I shook my head. "Th-this doesn't make sense." And the world, the future I'd built on the dreams I'd had was falling around me, but before my feelings could expand out of hurt and rejection to downright despair, I felt them catch, as a wave of calm overtook me, and I tried to use it to think logically, although the situation itself defied logic.

"I'm sorry. I am so sorry; if there were a way I could explain, if I could tell you everything, believe me, I would. But all I can say is that you being here, and us being friends, only will serve to hurt you in the long run."

There were two warring urges within me; pride, that wanted to scream that we weren't friends, of course we'd never been friends, that he meant nothing to me so of course this didn't hurt at all. Curiosity was telling me to pry and pull at his story, break it apart and learn what had turned someone I'd come to consider one of my best friends here against me.

Ultimately, neither won out as he pulled up to Aunt Mary's house. Feeling numb, I unbuckled my seatbelt, and opened the door. Before I could get out of the car, Jasper's hand wrapped around my wrist, and I turned, hoping for a punchline or something, anything, that would explain the miserable conversation we'd just had. "Goodbye, Mary Alice."

So there I was, left trying to piece together exactly what he meant.

He'd spoken of danger, of something he couldn't tell me, and then he'd said goodbye. As if this was the end of it, as if he didn't owe me a better explanation for why he'd decided to shut me out all of a sudden, as if I didn't deserve at least something more detailed than 'for your own sake, stay in Mississippi'.

And I couldn't even find it in me to be mad; instead I only felt sad. I'd pictured things between us going so differently, seen and known that they could. I didn't have the consolation of more visions to tell me that things would end up alright either. I was half-considering staying in Mississippi, mostly out of the fear of the humiliation I'd face walking into school in January and seeing Jasper. And given that I'd taken the time to actually look at re-enrolling here in Biloxi, my future was too muddled for my dreams to show me more than just flashes of what might be, nothing concrete enough for me to actually grasp. The more frustrating side of my gift was showing itself; until I made up my mind, I couldn't see anything, but I couldn't make up my mind about such a big decision after spending so many years just depending on my visions for guidance.

I supposed I'd have to handle things the frustratingly normal way, and talk about them.

I plated up the gingerbread cookies Melissa had made, and dodged the woman herself with practiced skill as I made my way back down to Cynthia.

"Okay, so here's the thing…"

The story Cynthia got was a little more condensed. I left out most of the stuff about danger, and just told her that he'd said that things could be bad for me if I stayed, and that I had no idea what he'd meant. And that I was sad because of it, and I didn't know what to do.

"Well, he's an ass."

I probably ought to have expected this response, having known Cynthia her whole life, but as always, the big sister in me was shocked whenever I turned to see that Cynthia was not a seven year old asking me when the tooth fairy would come.

"He is not." My knee jerk reaction was to defend Jasper, and I stood by it. I knew that there had to be something more to the story, some reason he acted the way that he did.

"Alice, he totally is. Who the hell does he think he is, telling you what to do? He doesn't even know you, not really. He can't tell you that you need to move. Who gave him the right? He's an ass."

"I don't—"

"Alice, don't tell me you are seriously considering listening to that guy? Where does he get off, bossing you around like that?"

"I mean… What if they're in the mob?"

"What?"

"What if the Hales are in the mob, and he's trying to keep me safe?"

"Oh my God, Alice, he's just being an asshole, you can't actually think him telling you to get out of town is some sort of sweet, protective gesture."

I shrugged, and looked to the side. "I don't know. If you'd asked me five minutes prior to the conversation, I wouldn't peg him as that much of an asshole."

"Look, here's what you're going to do. You're going to go back to Forks, and if he says boo to you about it, you're going to tell him to screw himself, and that you're a grown-ass woman who can make her own choices, and he needs to back the hell off. But first, you're going to stop laying in bed all day, and actually spend some of your holiday with me as a real, live, functioning human being, okay?"

I smiled at Cynthia. "Can I still eat all the cookies Melissa keeps baking?"

"Girl, yes you can, calories don't count on holiday, everyone knows that."

So it was decided. More by my bossy baby sister than me, but it was decided. I was going back to Forks. It was for the best, really. Life with my Dad and Melissa was difficult and uncomfortable even during such a short period of time, I'd never make it through the year and a half until graduation.

And with the decision finally made, the waters clear, I was able to dream.

I stood in the middle of a forest, just after a storm. The air was heavy and damp, and I could feel the cold from the ground seeping in through the soles of my shoes.

Jasper stood a few feet away from me, watching me with amber eyes. Waiting for me to speak.

"Kind of murdery that you brought me to the middle of the woods to talk to me."

Jasper laughed. "Sorry. Just didn't want anyone to overhear this."

"Well, I think you've accomplished that. No one around to hear me scream."

"You're not really afraid."

"No," a smile began to creep its' way across my mouth. "I'm not."

"So you heard the legends. What possible reason could you have for believing them?" He didn't sound angry, just curious.

"Well, if not for the fact that you and your family all act shady as hell, I probably wouldn't have tried to pry."

"Alice." His face became stern. "If I tell you this… I was serious before. You knowing puts you in more danger than before. Not from me or my family, but if someone else finds out that I told you, they might try to kill you."

"I mean, there are lots of reasons someone might try to kill me. I'm a very annoying woman."

"Don't joke." Before I could blink, he was in front of me, cradling my face in his cold hands. "If something happened to you, I couldn't live with myself."

"I know." I leaned forward, pressing my forehead to his shoulder. "But I already know."

The scene dissolved, and suddenly we were hurtling through the woods, me cradled in his arms, my own arms around his neck. I was half-screaming, half-laughing, the wind causing me to tear up as Jasper ran.

The world faded once more, and reformed to Emmett and Bella wrestling in a way that no humans should be able to, Bella throwing Emmett over her shoulder and into the tree line, Jasper, Edward and Esme cheering in the background.

The images began blurring, coming faster and faster.

Rosalie on one side of the room, then the other, a half second passing.

Carlisle and Esme, fingers entwined, dancing together in the kitchen of their house, moving with ethereal grace.

Emmett lifting a car overhead while Rosalie stood under and worked on the engine.

Bella and Edward racing across the yard of their house, darting through the trees and leaping over a river that snaked its way around the edge of the property, clearing it in a single bound.

Jasper and Emmett, rough housing. Jasper pushing too hard, and a tree coming down as Emmett hit it.

Jasper hunting a deer, stalking it before pouncing, like a giant cat, bringing his mouth to its neck. He pulled away, his mouth dripping red.

Jasper, Jasper, Jasper.

I sat straight up in my bed. My eyes adjusted to the dark of my childhood bedroom. The world still seemed to be in place. There were still glow-in-the-dark stars on the ceiling, still an overflowing bookshelf in the corner, still Cynthia's sleeping form in a bed across the room.

But my world had shifted off of its' axis.

Jacob's story from Thanksgiving came flooding back to me. Cold ones. Blood drinkers.

Vampires.

And I was sure. These dreams, with this much clarity, they only came when I was sure. Excluding the part between myself and Jasper, I'd probably just seen their activities for the next day, played out in my mind. Just a day in the life of a vampire family.

The Cullens and Hales were vampires.

I knew that if I was a rational human being who knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that there were vampires in her town, I'd probably be terrified. I'd probably be in my father's room right now, begging him to let me move back to Biloxi.

I wasn't.

Instead, I leaned against my headboard as the last few months snapped into a new perspective. It made sense why they were so reclusive. Why Jasper and Emmett had been rude to me in the beginning. Why Rosalie had looked at me as if I'd killed her cat when I got my bloody nose in gym class, and why Edward had burst into the nurse's office a few minutes later.

Why Jasper had told me to stay out of Forks, and told me that he couldn't say why.

Contemplatively, I swung down out of bed, walked downstairs, and poured myself a glass of water. Was I crazy? Had something inside me finally snapped? Was that what this was? It would be pretty easy to get myself committed, saying that I could see the future and I had a crush on a vampire.

I'd long since put to bed the fears that I was losing my mind over my visions, but sometimes they crept back up. Then again, they say that those who worry about being crazy aren't crazy. So as long as I kept up some reasonable skepticism, I might be alright.

But then, of course, the fact that I was acknowledging that I felt fairly certain that a family at my school was comprised of vampires probably indicated that that skepticism was long gone.

And now I was just confusing myself.

I sipped my water, taking a seat at the kitchen table. It was only four in the morning. I should probably go try and get a few more hours of sleep, but after the revelations of my dream, I wasn't sure if I'd be able to.

It was almost a new year. Christmas had come and gone, without much fanfare. Ever since… Well, ever since last year, we Brandons hadn't been much for celebration. Melissa hadn't even bothered with a tree. I knew that it killed Cynthia, that she was ready to be done mourning and live life again, but that she'd never dare say it to our father, or Melissa. Or to me.

No, staying in Mississippi hadn't ever really been an option. In this house, with its history and with Melissa looking at me the way she did, I knew I would never be happy here. She hadn't spoken two words to me since I'd come back. I didn't blame her. I hated myself for how things had happened, before. I didn't think I'd ever forgive myself.

My father was likewise distant. He'd hugged me when I first got in, all elbows and angles as he welcomed his eldest child home. Since then, we'd had a few conversations, mostly about the weather and my grades. But nothing substantial.

Cynthia had once explained to me that she believed that there were strings of a sort, keeping souls tethered together, tying people to those most important, that couldn't be damaged by distance or age. She said the two of us had a rope between us, thick and strong and unbreakable. If that was true, the strings between my father and I had snapped years ago, and I didn't believe that they could be repaired or retied, even if we'd wanted to try. We couldn't undo the damage of a decade of neglect and emotional abuse.

I hated him, in a way. For not understanding, for pushing me away when I was too little to understand why, and for never reaching out to repair our relationship, instead focusing on his replacement wife and his second daughter who didn't ask every night when Mommy was coming home. It wasn't Cynthia's fault, and, unpleasant though she may be, it wasn't Melissa's either. I had been a child, but my father, the adult, still couldn't find it in him to try and make things right between us.

I put my glass in the sink and walked up to bed.

Four days later, I was back in Aunt Mary's car, driving back to Forks from Port Angeles, the situation strongly reminiscent of my first day in Washington. But this time I knew what I was getting into.

"The house was quiet, with you gone," Aunt Mary observed.

I clicked my tongue but didn't respond, leaning my forehead against the window of the car.

I'd spent a lot of time, thinking about what I'd say when I saw Jasper again. How to get us to the conversation where he chose to open up and share it all with me. I was debating between just walking around like everything is normal, or going up to his lunch table, slamming my hands down to get his attention, and just asking, 'So, vampires, huh?'

Neither one seemed particularly promising.

I spent my night unpacking my suitcase and repacking my backpack for school the next morning. I'd finished my homework over the first few days of break. Turns out that not wanting to talk to anyone or do anything that involved being social actually did wonders for my productivity when it came to school work. Who knew?

I didn't sleep well. Too nervous about the upcoming day, I tossed and turned the whole night. That morning, I was so tired that I lost track of time in the shower, had to do a rush job with my hair and ended up just throwing it under a beanie, didn't get more than eyeliner on until I saw that I was already late, and was down the street before I realized I'd walked out of the house wearing shoes from two different pairs. Giving the morning up for a wash, I trudged back to the house, and kicked off the red pump on my left foot to switch it out for a matching black boot.

Aunt Mary came into the hallway and gave me a half-smirk, half-grimace. She seemed to be on her way out, keys in hand. I hated to do it, but given the morning I'd had and the day I'd likely continue to have, I had no choice. "Aunt Mary, could you write me a tardy slip?"

I expected a fight. It had been a condition when I moved in that I'd be self-sufficient, and at most she'd write a sick note if I had appendicitis or diphtheria or something. And when Aunt Mary raised her eyebrow at me, I was ready for a 'get your ass to school and stop being lazy', but instead, she just said, "Pass me a pen."

I dug one out of my backpack, and handed it over.

"Don't make a habit of it," Aunt Mary said, giving me the note. "But if you're going to be late, take the time to fix your hair."

"Thank you." I tucked the note into my pocket.

Aunt Mary left, giving me ample time to rewash my hair and properly style it, fix my make up, and find a more flattering dress to wear, this time with matching shoes. I was ready to go.

I checked the clock on my way to the door. If I left now, then I'd be getting in just in time to see Edward and Bella in Bio. But I couldn't do that, couldn't face them, not yet. And I'd already missed English and French, so what's one more class, in the grand scheme of things? That was a reasonable enough rationalization to pause and eat something more substantial than an apple for breakfast, I decided, texting Mike to ask for a copy of his Biology notes, and pouring myself a bowl of Fruit Loops while I ran down the clock.

Call me crazy, but I needed to see Jasper first.

So I walked slowly to school, chatted with the receptionist in the front office, dallied around my locker, and made it to class in time for fourth period, Art, where I was able to sit in a corner and sketch and not talk to anyone about my holiday while I waited for my lunch period, to commence. I had too many confusing thoughts going through my head about the Hales, not to mention my family, to bother with making something up about having a merry Christmas, or a happy New Year, if anyone that I ran into wanted to make small talk.

I'd only been back in Washington for a day, and I already missed Cynthia. My sister's tendency to kick my ass into gear had been invaluable in Mississippi, but I needed more, needed something to encourage me in that moment, in the hallway outside the cafeteria, to force me to take those steps through the double doors and face the man who'd been taking over my dreams for months now.

Instead, like a coward, I stood outside the cafeteria, scuffing the toe of my shoe over the ground while the noise from inside filtered out towards me.

"What are you doing?" I spun around to see Lauren making her way down the hall.

"Excuse me?"

"Why aren't you going in?" She gestured to the cafeteria, her brow wrinkled.

"Oh. Um, I was trying to remember if I had Math homework I forgot to do. But, you know, I think I'm good."

Lauren nodded slowly, still giving me a strange look, before she passed me and walked into the cafeteria. Steeling my nerves, I followed her through the doors. Involuntarily, my eyes were drawn to the table with the Hales and the Cullens. And they were all staring at me.

I jerked my head away, turned back to my usual table. Jess had half-turned in her seat, and was grinning at me, waving me over. She and Mike were holding hands under the table, and I couldn't stop myself from smiling when I saw that. Angela actually got up to hug me, and asked me how my holiday was, and I shot off about how nice it was to be somewhere warm for a change, while Eric teased me about being too southern to function in Washington. But I was quickly able to turn the conversation to the Winter Formal, and Jess leaned over to show me all the photos she'd taken, which I'd already seen on Instagram, but, you know, it's important to be polite.

"I really wish I could have been there," I said, examining their group selfie. "But what did I tell you, was that the dress, or was that the dress?"

"That was the dress!" Jessica laughed, bumping my shoulder with hers. "Seriously, thank you so much for helping me find it… But, hey, what about what happened to you that night?"

Mike, Eric, and Lauren, all seemed to vary between interested and confused, while Angela looked like she wanted to hit Jessica. "Come on, Jess, we don't need to bring that up."

"Um… I got freaked out, I'm sorry I kind of spaced on you guys."

"No, not that! You saw my car get smushed, I'd have been freaked too. After. When you and… well, you know who," she cast a glance over her shoulder at the Hale table, "went off together!"

"Oh. Yeah, that." I began chewing on my lower lip. "Well, I can promise you that Voldemort and I aren't having some torrid affair, if that's what you were wondering."

"Come on, something had to happen! I'll tell you what happened with the sister if you tell us what you guys talked about."

I quirked a brow, and smiled. "What happened with Bella?"

"We sat in awkward silence for about an hour and Jessica got out of the car with me at my house instead of riding ten more minutes alone with her," Angela cut in. At least Jess had the decency to duck her head while the rest of us laughed.

"But you went out on the closest thing Jasper Hale's had to a date since he came to Forks, we do need some details," Lauren added. I nodded along, and pulled out my lunch, picking at the bagel I'd packed.

After a few minutes of silence, I looked up to see them all staring at me. I gave them all a tight smile, but kept eating.

"Alice!" Jess burst out after another minute.

"Nothing happened. He took me to a diner so I could get something and like, I don't know, not pass out from low blood sugar, then he drove me home, I packed up my stuff and went down to Mississippi. That's not a really interesting story."

"Alice, you haven't lived here long, but still, at this point it's been like three months, so you should know that they—" Lauren gestured over her shoulder to the Hale table, "—They don't talk to anyone. He took you to a restaurant. That does not happen."

I thought, 'Probably because you wouldn't like it if they really took you out for dinner,' but kept my face schooled neutral, even as my mind flashed back to the image of Jasper with blood dripping down his chin. Really not sexy at all, and there was probably something very wrong with me that I was willing to overlook it, but I'd have to at least hear him out before I decided how skeeved I was going to be by the whole 'vampire' thing.

I shook my head to myself; there really was be something wrong with me. But hey, from what I'd observed, it didn't seem as if human actually was on the menu; I'd give them the benefit of the doubt.

There was a snapping noise, Angela let out a soft squeak, and both she, Lauren and Eric stared at something over my shoulder with sheer panic. I turned in my seat, and saw Edward Cullen standing at his table, his chair pushed back, his lunch tray snapped in two in his hands, glaring at me with unadulterated hatred. As one, all of his siblings turned to focus their amber eyes on me as well, before they all stood up in unison and walked out of the cafeteria.

"They were staring at us, right? I didn't just imagine that?" Mike asked slowly, looking between all of us.

"Yeah, let's just move along," I said, eating another bite of my bagel. "Eric, you went skiing, what was that like?"

So, something had happened that had tipped my hand. They knew that I knew.

Well, it was bound to happen eventually. I didn't need one of my dreams to know that I'd say something, tell Jasper, probably by the end of the day. After the dreams I'd had, I knew that I wasn't going to be able to keep my feelings at bay, no matter what horrible things I unearthed, and I'd become rather resigned to that fact. I'd confront him, and deal with this. He wouldn't hurt me. Edward might, judging by the black looks he'd been giving me, but I'd have seen that, if it was coming today. And I was calm, so calm. I probably shouldn't have been, but I felt steady, steady enough to examine what was going on at least. "Bell's about to ring, we should go."

Eric insisted on walking me to the gym. "Cullen looked like he was about to go Columbine on us, I want to make sure you get to class in one piece."

"Eric! That's an awful thing to say, jeez!"

"Come on, you're telling me you'd honestly be surprised to learn that one of them had like… Murdered a hitchhiker and the others had helped hide the body?"

"Don't be mean, come on," I shook my head, and Eric frowned at me. "I'll see you later, okay?"

Eric crossed his arms. "Yeah, whatever," and left me by the locker room doors.

Gym class and Math both dragged on. The second hand took eternities to tick along, never mind the minutes. I knew that in just a few measly hours I'd be sitting beside Jasper, with Emmett a few seats down, and he'd know that I knew.

I was slightly incorrect; when I got to History, Emmett was nowhere to be found. To that point, I didn't think I'd seen Rosalie in the gym locker room after lunch either.

But Jasper was there, his face grim and his hands clenched into fists.

Okay, I thought sliding into my seat, a shiver of apprehension rising in my chest. This may have been a bad idea.

Aight bitches, got you guys a nice long one today. Don't tell sober UT, she'll be pissed, cause this nasty bitch is unedited, but I am drunk as a skunk, so guess who's got two thumbs and doesn't give a fuck? This girl.

A couple orders of business: Yes, Alice is being irrationally level-headed, and this will be addressed later on, but considering what we know of her character, don't you think she'd react pretty oddly regardless? Also: Tragic backstory is coming up, I promise, I know there's a lot of mystery about her home life, but that will all eventually be addressed. Pinky swear.

If you guys wanna follow me on tumblr, I literally just made a sideblog for this, because drunk UT is way the hell more productive than sober UT, which is ironic. Anyways, I'm at unfortunate-twihard. tumblr. com with no spaces cause is real rude about using links in fics. Come drop a line, ask a question, and I'll probs post updates on when the next chapter can be expected. Please do it I love it when people talk to me.

This may just be the liquor talking, but I totally am gonna do a companion fic, or at least companion bits from other POVs, because I put so much thought into the reason things happen as they do and you guys just have no idea what's going on under the surface, and you guys should know.

Anyways, even if you don't want to stop by my tumblr, say hi in the reviews. I like talking to people. Sober UT is pretty brief in most of her A/Ns but sober UT also made you guys wait like 7 months between chapters, so really, let's work together and not let this bitch win.

Enjoy, my loves.